As I related in yesterday’s post, I rented a room for the homeless woman I call “mama”. The first month’s rent and a security deposit set me back 6000 pesos ($120.). A small price to pay to make a difference in someone’s life and I was happy to do it.

Late in the afternoon yesterday, I headed out for some liquid refreshment at Cheap Charlies. And lo and behold, mama was sitting under her ever-present umbrella right outside the stairs to the bar. I gave her the good news and told her to stick around for a bit. I contacted my Filipina friend who had found the place and asked her to join us. Once she arrived she contacted the woman getting extra keys made so we could take mama home. Soon enough, we were all in a trike on the way to Baloy beach.

Upon arrival, we showed mama her new place, demonstrated how the lock worked and where to turn on the lights. We also told her that in the morning we’d come back with a bed cushion, a shower curtain, a fan, and anything else needed for her comfort. My friend told her she would help give the place a good scrubbing as well. Then we invited mama to join us for dinner.

Dinner conversation was light and mostly in Tagalog. I did learn that mama is 68 and was very popular back in the days when Subic was a regular port of call for the US Navy. I think I heard her say that at some point she was married to a Marine. After we ate, we walked back to mama’s new place. I wanted to be sure she could open the door and turn on the light (you have to plug it in before hitting the switch). She managed that just fine and so we reminded her we’d be back in the morning to fix the place up some and said our goodnights.

On the way out, we saw Gerlie, mama’s new neighbor and a friend of mine. She invited us to join her for a beer, so we sat on her porch and enjoyed a cold one. Before I finished that beer, the words Kevin Kim left in a comment on an earlier post echoed in my brain:

Keep in mind that many homeless folks get so used to living on the street that, when they’re gifted with lodging, they fail to maintain their domicile and/or abandon it completely. Some habits are too deeply ingrained, and for the benefactor, the whole thing becomes a waste of money and time. I suspect that “mama” will need some constant supervision if this project is to go well and smoothly.

Back in my more bleeding-heart days, I did a lot of work with the homeless in the DC-Metro area. There’re tons of homeless folks in and around my hometown of Alexandria, Virginia. Most of them have some sort of mental/psychological condition, which is what often compels them to fuck up a good thing. As much as I’m a believer in free will and personal responsibility, I know that some compulsions are powerful and extremely hard to beat (viz. me and overeating). They CAN be beaten, but it takes time, effort, focus, and the care/support of other people to help one along.

Upshot: I’m not optimistic that giving “mama” a home will solve whatever you perceive her problems to be. I mean, I might be totally wrong, but experience and instinct both whisper that I’m probably right.

A few minutes after we left her, mama walked up and held out the key to me saying “I can’t do the lock”. I said I’ll help you with that and she responded “no, I don’t want.” I told her to keep her key (I’d put it on a necklace so she wouldn’t lose it), I’d use my key to lock up for her. She repeated, “no, I don’t want.” You don’t want to sleep there, I asked? “No, papa.” Why don’t you try it for a few days and see? “No papa, I don’t want.” She handed me the key and walked away. Alright, then.

Okay, I figured it was a 50-50 chance it wouldn’t work out. But I was surprised she didn’t even want to give it a chance. Granted, it’s a pretty crappy room, but still, you’d think it would be better than sleeping on the street. Apparently not, at least in mama’s tortured mind. Kevin’s thinking proved to be spot-on; sometimes the people you think you are helping don’t want to be helped. And really, one of the things I have always admired about mama was that she seems genuinely happy whenever I see her. Perhaps I was foolish to think I could make things better for her. Although in my defense, she did tell me when I asked that she would like a place of her own. Heh, maybe she was thinking it would be fancier. Who knows? I don’t regret trying. And if any of my readers are looking for an inexpensive place to stay close to the beach, let me know!

My dreams of upgrading my own accommodations hit a snag when the agent for that house I like advised that the owner was not interested in renting it out, only selling. Oh well. I do think I’ll email the owner directly and ask, the agent has a financial interest in making a sale. The owner might find a long-term lease more attractive than a house that has been sitting vacant for over a year now. We’ll see.

The day wasn’t a total loss though. I had a nice 8K solitary walk in the morning. I did that 1000 step photo thing again:

You can Relive that walk here if you are so inclined.

And here we are with another Hash Monday upon us. Leech My Nuggets is the Hare and he has a 7.5K trail lined up. I will be short-cutting at my discretion, but I am walking to the start which adds about 3K,. So, subtracting one of those hills should even things out some.

And so it goes.

The Friday walking group has a sense of adventure. Or at least we try to by changing things up some and looking for new or little-used trails. Preferably outside of our usual stomping grounds. And that’s just what we did yesterday. Loaded up the eight of us in the Hashmobile and drove out to the Naugsal barangay to climb a new mountain. Well, it was new to me at least. A couple of the old-timers had last been up this way five years ago.

I’m sure I’ve mentioned this before, but adventure is a two-edged sword. Sure, you get the excitement of seeing and doing new things. But you also sometimes encounter the unexpected, leading to the inevitable unanticipated consequences. We dealt with a lot of the latter yesterday.

Things change over time. This became abundantly clear near the beginning of our hike when our trail leaders could not find the way up the mountain they had used all those years ago. So, we found an alternative trail of sorts to climb and thus began our adventure.

It was a long, hard, and steep path to the top of the mountain. It took about an hour to do that one-kilometer climb if that gives any indication of how difficult it was. The trail appeared to be little used as well. One thing I noticed early on was that there were no shanties or shacks or other signs of people spending time up there. Another thing that stood out was the absence of litter, which is pretty much unheard of in this country. In retrospect, that should have been a warning sign. Near the top, there were a couple of piles of harvested thatch grass waiting to be carried back down. Other than that, no indications that people spent time up here. At the time I thought that was a nice change from the ordinary. And despite the challenging climb, I was really enjoying the new vistas and perspectives.

Once we reached the top, our trail leaders fanned out in search of the true trail we were aiming for but there was nothing to be found. So we commenced hiking along the ridgeline keeping our eyes peeled for a trail down the other side of the mountain. This effort was stymied in large part because the thatch grass up top was taller and thicker than any I’ve encountered previously. Eventually, we came across something with a path-like appearance and given the lack of viable alternatives, decided to see where it might take us.

It wasn’t long before it became apparent that what we were on was not a human-made path, instead, it was the way that water found to travel down the mountain. Eventually, we found ourselves in an actual creekbed. Those are generally a pain in the ass to traverse and this one was no exception. Several times we had to climb up and around nature’s obstacles in the watercourse. And still no sign of an actual trail made by and for human beings. Despite our hike becoming more of an ordeal, no one wanted to turn around and go back from whence we came. We all agreed that the nightmare behind us could be no worse than whatever might still lay ahead. So on we plodded.

That thatch grass is always a bitch to walk through and sometimes will leave scratches and/or itches. But in the creekbed, we were constantly getting tangled up in vines and roots that would trip us up. Even worse, some of those vines were covered in sharp thorns that hurt like a motherfucker when they stabbed you. It was also a very steep descent in places which made for really slow going. I managed to keep my feet somehow, but poor Scott went down three times that I saw. Once was perilously close to a drop-off that would have definitely ruined his day had he gone over the edge.

I’m writing this so that’s a pretty good clue that I survived. So did everyone else. Near the bottom of the mountain, we did finally come across a path that led us back to civilization. It was one of the hardest trails I’ve ever done. It was only a bit more than 6K from beginning to end, but it took us over 3 hours to complete. That’s slow, even for me!

What’s an adventure without photographic evidence? Here you go:

And so ended our adventure. How whipped was I? Well, I didn’t do the traditional after-hike beer stop. That should give you some indication.

Next week we are going all the way out to San Antonio for our Friday hike. Scott promises it will be a flat and adventure-free trail. We’ll see.

UPDATE: Here is Scott’s Relive video of the hike brought to you by popular request.

UPDATE II: My Relive finally uploaded:

Oh wait, it WAS only yesterday! Here’s how it went down:

I walked up the National Highway towards Subic town for 45 minutes, then walked back on the other side. It was as boring as it sounds, but I got my steps in at least.

Napped and showered, then headed into town for a haircut. Stopped at Queen Victoria on the way to have a chat with one of the waitresses there I’m friendly with. She had messaged me the afternoon before asking for help because her son in the province had been injured in an accident. Accidents are common especially when it comes to slip and fall injury cases . In such cases people can contact attorneys to compensation. Well, she offered to clean my house or do laundry, but I have people for that already. I told her my masseuse position was vacant, but she said she wasn’t good at massage. I asked if she wanted to go hiking with me the next day and she responded that she didn’t feel like it. Okay, then. I’m thinking, “you want my help but you don’t want to help me”, that makes it easy to say no. I didn’t tell her that though. So, after thinking about it some more on my morning walk I decided I would relent and give her the 3000 pesos ($60.) she had requested. She was very surprised when I handed her the money and got a little teary-eyed. I told her I’m more inclined to help those who are willing to at least try to return the favor and let it go at that.

My transgender barber was wearing short shorts and a halter top. I briefly thought it would be easy for a dick to fall out of those cutoffs, assuming she still has one. Then, just to be safe, I kept my eyes closed for the remainder of the haircut.

After I left the barbershop, I ran into my homeless “mama” in one of her usual spots. She was laying down again, and as I approached I asked if she was still resting her mind. She laughed and said, “no, I’m thinking about finding a boyfriend.” Why? For boom-boom? I asked. She said, “yes, and to take care of me, and take me shopping.” Hmm. I asked if she wanted her own place to live in and she told me, “oh, yes! I would like that very much, papa!”. Well, I can’t help her in the boyfriend department but I’ve asked one of my Filipina friends to help me find a small cottage-type place that I can rent for her. We’ll see.

Since I was already on the far side of town, I popped into Dive In for a beer and to say hi to Jessa. I was the only customer, so I bought Jessa a drink. We chatted a bit, then she challenged me to a game of pool. I suck at pool but played her anyway. I wound up scratching on the 8-ball so she got the victory. A bit later one of her regulars came in, so I finished my beer and headed out. Jessa was looking good though, and I almost felt some regret that things didn’t work out for us. C’est la vie!

Headed down the highway for some beers with a view at Palm Tree. One of my neighbors from Alta Vista was there and we had a nice chat. I was surprised when he told me he had rented his house out to a Canadian who’ll be moving in next month. I guess he’ll be my ex-neighbor soon. I’m still considering moving when my lease expires in June. I really like living in Alta Vista though. Wish I’d known that Tony’s place was going to be available. Oh well, I’ll keep my eyes open for future opportunities.

What else? Well, this gal from Manila I “met” on a dating site calls me “boss”. I don’t know why. She claims to be an extreme introvert, and I don’t get the sense she has any desire or intention to ever meet me in the real world. But she sent me this creation for some reason:

I wasn’t a big Rush Limbaugh fan, but I did appreciate that he gave voice to some viewpoints shared by people like me that would never be aired in the lamestream media. Rumor has it that this was his last tweet:

This was the poison I posted yesterday to annoy my lefty Facebook friends:

Alright, time for me to head out for Friday night darts! I had quite the adventure on today’s hike. I’ll tell you all about it tomorrow…

I did have several beers last night. I also wound up not playing darts. Just wasn’t “feeling” it somehow. Instead, I moseyed up the highway to sit outside and watch the world go by at McCoy’s. Well, truth be told that ain’t all I watched.

Anyway, I had a rather nice time hanging out with Joy. She was new to the bar, returning after a two-year hiatus. She told me I had bought her a drink once before back in the day. I have no recollection of that event, however. Joy also revealed the reason for her long break–she had a baby. She resides with the father as well, so despite my perverted attraction to those legs her warm heart, there will be no Joy in my future.

It was Wednesday night, so on the way home I popped into The Pub and ordered up some Korean wings for takeout. 10% off on Wednesday so it’s becoming my new tradition.

Earlier in the day, I participated in the Wednesday Walkers group hike. We did a relatively hard (for us) 6K hike in the hills around Barretto. We did two moderate climbs along the way. It’s interesting how an up affects you. I’ve done twice that distance on flat ground and didn’t feel nearly as tired as I did yesterday. Oh well, as Stephen Stills sang long ago: “it’s no matter, no distance, it’s the ride.”

Can you wonder what lies beyond? Though you’ve been
There before and forget about the effort and the strain
Always ascending, each yard as a mile to the never ending pull
Of the steepening grade that’s before you

It’s no matter, no distance, it’s the ride

Another nothing Tuesday is behind me. Well, next to nothing anyway.

Got my groceries for the week. Hit two stores, Pure Gold and Royal, in an effort to secure some essentials I’ve been unable to find. Not much luck, although, I was able to score some frozen fruits to feed my smoothie addiction.

Went to get a haircut but my transgender barber wasn’t in. I did see “mama”, the homeless woman I help out, laying underneath her umbrella in front of a closed hotel. As I approached she sat up, and I asked if she had been sleeping. “No, I was just resting my mind”. I don’t know why, but that cracked me up. We should probably all take the time to do that regularly.

Played darts in the tourney, drew a good partner and achieved first out status. That’s where you play so poorly you are the first to be eliminated from the tournament. It was just one of those nights when we were both off our game and got our asses kicked. Oh well, it happens.

On the bright side, I was able to escape the confines of Alley Cats and make my way to my beachside stool at Mango’s. Ordered up my favorite dish, the grilled pork chops, and they didn’t disappoint. A nice way to finish off a rather boring and lazy day.

And it is good to be alive, regardless. We had another death in our little town this week–John Francis Kingsley. I actually didn’t know the man personally but had met him at last year’s VFW Beach Bash.

I learned of his passing when I saw the announcement posted in front of the house I didn’t know was his.

Although I didn’t know Jack or where he lived, I had previously noticed the house with envy.

I’ll have to keep my eyes open to see if a “for rent” sign appears out front.

That’s all the news from here. But I do have these tidbits to share:

And finally, this one is for you, Kevin Kim:

When I was with USFK, we had lots of contractors working for us. Or is that a contradiction? Okay, I’ll sign off now.

Here’s hoping everyone had a great Valentine’s Day. Me? I don’t give a shit about VD. I don’t have a love interest, and if I did, I’d love her the same every day of the year, not just on February 14. VD seems to be a big deal here in these parts though. Most of the locals call it “hearts day”. Which maybe is better than VD anyway.

My dateless heart day was similar to every other day I spend alone here. Which is not to say I was alone. I was surrounded by women in Cheap Charlies. Ordered up some food from downstairs and shared it with the staff. Bought Lorena some lady drinks and couldn’t help but notice her protruding (more than usual) belly. She confessed that she is, indeed, five months pregnant. I would say they never learn, but I do believe getting knocked up is just part of the culture here. That explains why so many live their lives in poverty. Ah, well. I gave her a bigger tip than normal when I left.

I did see something that seemed genuinely sweet from my perch overlooking the highway. I noticed a young woman limping along with a deformed leg. And the guy she was with had a similar problem with one of his legs. So, maybe it is true that there is someone for everyone out there. Lorena speculated that perhaps they were brother and sister, but I think the odds of two siblings being born with the same defect have got to be very low. Besides, my idea is much more romantic and in keeping with the spirit of VD.

I was drinking gin and sodas which hit me harder than usual, so I made it an early night. Got a rare message from Jee Yeun, wishing me a happy Valentines. I responded “you too” and went to bed. Up before the sun this morning and the sky made me wonder if I should heed a sailor’s warning.

On the dog walk, I observed yet another house starting construction in my neighborhood.

Later on, I treated myself to a pleasant morning walk on the beach, as well.

I’ve got the Hash coming up this afternoon. Already have a plan in place to leave early and modify the trail as I deem necessary. That’s just the way I roll these days and I don’t give a damn if anyone doesn’t like it. I’ll let you know how it goes tomorrow.

On my beach jaunt, this old Kris Kristofferson tune came up in my playlist. I guess it is about as romantic as everything else in my life these days.

From the coalmines of Kentucky to the California sun,
Bobby shared the secrets of my soul,
Standin’ right beside me through everythin’ I done,
And every night she kept me from the cold.
Then somewhere near Salinas, Lord, I let her slip away,
She was lookin’ for the love I hope she’ll find,
Well I’d trade all my tomorrows for a single yesterday,
Holdin’ Bobby’s body close to mine.

Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose,
And nothin’ left was all she left to me,
Feelin’ good was easy, Lord, when Bobby sang the blues,
And buddy, that was good enough for me.
Good enough for me and Bobby McGee.

Another Friday is in the books! A long-ass group hike, an unusual bar crawl, and some good eats. But let’s start with darts.

I had a different kind of fun 49 years ago at the high school prom. My girlfriend Karen and I are still Facebook friends and had a good laugh at this memory.

My bar crawl last night was out of the norm because I went to bars I don’t normally visit. Started out at McCoy’s, a new bar formerly known as T-Rose. I sat streetside and enjoyed my first beers of the evening.

My next stop was Dive In, another rarely visited place. As the name implies, it’s a bit of a dive. Only place I know that actually allows smoking inside. That doesn’t bother me though, I enjoy my vape indoors too. Jessa was bartending and it was nice to see her again and chat a bit. One of the guys at the bar kept buying her lady drinks so I didn’t have to. Win-win!

The nicest thing about my time in Dive In though was the other two guys in the bar. Um, that sounds a little different than I intend. Both were also named John. One guy was doing the music via YouTube and playing an eclectic mix of tunes I enjoyed. The other John was actually someone I had met before at a Hash although he is a very infrequent attendee. We didn’t recognize each other at first because it is a very dark bar and both of us are old and going blind. Still, we had some lively bar banter and some laughs. For a solitary guy like me that was a nice change of pace.

Still, it was getting late (for a guy like me) and I had baby back ribs in the crockpot at home. I said my goodbyes and headed out. One of the reasons I don’t visit Dive In much is that it is on the far end of town from my house. So, by the time I got to my side of town I was thirsty again. I popped into Outback and pulled up a seat at the outdoor poolside bar. You can even see the bay from there. Well, you could if the sun was out.

It had been a long time since I’ve been to Outback. I guess it’s safe now to mention this is one of the bars that operated as a speakeasy until I got word directly from the manager that the bar was closing. I wrote about that here and speculated at the time that perhaps it was just me being banned. I later learned that that was indeed the case. Since that time I’ve not felt compelled to support the bar after it reopened. If you didn’t want me then you don’t get me now kinda thing. Lots of other options these days anyway.

Among the options I prefer are the open-air venues. Mango’s beachside bar has been a favorite. And the Palm Tree next door has an awesome view from their second-floor deck. Of course, there is Cheap Charlies where you can watch the action on the highway below. I’ll probably add the previously mentioned McCoy’s to the rotation as well. These days being enclosed in a place like Alley Cats or Queen Victoria gives me an almost claustrophobic feeling somehow. I guess that damn COVID has changed my drinking habits forever! Oh well.

Anyhoo, there was a cute girl named Gina working the bar at Outback last night. I had had a few beers by now so I might have been a bit more flirtatious than normal. She was spunky and sassy though and gave back as much as I threw at her, so it was fun. I doubt I’ll become a regular though because of the bad history I had in the speakeasy days. So, that was my bar crawl.

On the way home my Fitbit started vibrating to announce I had hit a step milestone:

I got home around 8:00 and still needed to finish up the baby back ribs. Popped them in the over to put a glaze of bbq sauce on top and then enjoyed half a slab before bed. Got up this morning and had to decide whether to eat the leftovers from the burrito fixin’s I prepared for dinner on Thursday or the ribs from the night before. And then it hit me:

Life is good! As good as the sandwich I enjoyed after yesterday’s hike:

Speaking of Sit-n-Bull, one of the things I enjoy is their daily specials menu. Didn’t order off it yesterday because I was craving a French roast beef dip, but there were several tempting options.

Alright, I saved the hike for last this time but it was probably the best part of the day. The group met up at Barretto High School on Rizal Extension. We made our way up the mountain, picking up the part of Guenter’s Hash trail we avoided on Monday, for a steep and long climb to the ridgeline. We then followed the ridgeline all the way to where it intersected with Guenter’s “insane” trail. We weren’t totally out of our minds though, we just did one of the downhill portions. Hell, we had to get back down somehow, so why not? It worked out for us, but damn, that was a long and very steep descent. And just when I thought I had made it all the way down without a slip, trip, or fall, I stepped on a slick creekside rock and took a hard tumble. It could have been worse if I had come down on my head instead of my hand, but it stung pretty good at the time. We wound up doing close to 12K which is quite a bit longer than our Friday group of geezers normally does. Still, saw some new countryside that was very beautiful and now we can brag that we hiked the insane trail. To the pictures then:

Okay, I misled you in the title of this post. There was one butt.

And that was my day.

UPDATE: Damn, I can’t believe I used this title once before, back in November 2017. That post was about a prostate exam though.

I’ve got my routines and within those routines I have routines. I have my walking routines of course; three weekly group hikes and three days of solitary walking. Thursday is the alone day when I push myself to walk a little longer and further than normal. Yesterday I did a bit over 12K in a little more than 2.5 hours. Granted it was mostly flat. I had originally planned to walk to Waltermart on the far side of Subic town, then return home via the National highway. When I reached the GOVIC bypass road I changed my mind and turned left instead of right. Just wasn’t feeling that long walk home on the busy highway. Maybe I’ll do it next week.

I’ve got some pictures to share from the walk:

You can Relive the walk here if you’d like.

No darts on Thursday, so after the requisite nap and shower, I made my way down the highway to Cheap Charlies for beers and bargirl companionship. The beer was cold and the girls were hot. Well, one of those is true. The girls were friendly enough though and I of course rewarded their acting like I’m special with a couple of lady drinks. The traffic on the highway is especially bad lately because Subic is STILL doing their insane and pointless vehicle checkpoint which creates a gridlocked mess that is a danger to all involved, especially pedestrians.

After a couple (or was it a few?) beers I moved down the road to Mango’s and took my usual seat overlooking the beach. My beer bottle had a rust encrustation on the mouthpiece so the waitress provided a frosty mug to pour the beer into. As I sat there enjoying the view I thought about how someday I ought to write the story of my life.

It may not be much of a life, but strangely I don’t seem to give a shit. I wonder why that is?

So, I guess I better get after it before those caring feelings start slipping in. Back tomorrow with more of the same, but different enough to be almost new.

A drama-free day doesn’t have to be boring. An abbreviated version of the Wednesday Walkers took a hike out to, up, over, and around Black Rock mountain. Being in the shadow of Black Rock is relatively common on our walks but it had been a while since we’d done the actual climb. It’s really not that hard getting up but coming down the backside can get a little tricky. It’s not really bad on a dry day like yesterday but when things get wet it’s pretty much a no-go for those of us who choose not to risk life and limb.

You can Relive the hike here if you so desire.

After a nap and a shower, I had a quiet night in town. Just trying to stay healthy. Or alive.

And just now as I finish this post I encounter an epilog to the one I wrote yesterday.

Hi!?
You sent Today at 12:53 PM

What’s up?

Honey sent Today at 12:54 PM

I’m not OK where are u now!?
You sent Today at 12:55 PM

I’m at home…

Honey sent Today at 12:58 PM

Where!? I really really need to pay my rent apartment for tomorrow and if I not give I living out., can u helping me I need 3000 only please send me I pay back to u if u want meet me!?

I’ve been wracking my brain trying to remember who this is. We have five mutual friends on Facebook but none that I think I’ve met in person. Her profile says she works at Arizona but I don’t remember her from there either. I’m not there much these days though. I’m guessing that she worked on the floating bar in the pre-pandemic days.

Anyway, no response is the “no” I chose. So far it seems to have worked.

Ah well, time to play my singles league dart match. Back with more tomorrow.

It turned out to be a more interesting Tuesday than usual. Granted, that’s not saying much, but still. Here are the highlights:

I met up with Kate at the Mangos beach bar at the appointed time of 3:00 p.m. She was waiting when I arrived. I ordered up a beer and chicken fingers, she had a mango juice. Our drinks arrived, we settled in, and then she proceeded to share her tale of woe.

As I understood her to say, some time back they had pawned the family trike which was their primary source of income. Apparently, this was done to finance the cost of the baby she delivered last year.

Kate said that when the pawn loan came due she was unable to make repayment in full, but worked out an arrangement to make monthly installment payments. That changed recently when the owner of the loan demanded payment in full because of their own family emergency–grandmother in the hospital if I recall correctly. Kate tearfully told me that her entire family blames her for this situation and her father says it is her responsibility to make things right. Can I please help her?

Well, that was quite a story. Presented with excellent dramatic effect and with all the elements necessary to tug at your heartstrings. But how much was this story worth?

“How much are you looking for?” I asked her.

“50,000 pesos” she responded.

It’s a good thing I was sitting down. That’s $1041.41 at today’s exchange rate. Now, I may be an easy touch when you are asking for fifty or a hundred dollars, much more than that we better be related or at least intimate. And while I do have the means to “loan” someone the amount Kate is looking for, I don’t have any desire to do so. First of all, I barely know this woman other than as a fellow Hasher and Facebook friend. I was scammed for a thousand bucks by Gemma, a woman I had dated and considered a friend. My trust in her was unfounded. And y’all read my post a couple of days ago about the $400. laptop I bought for Jhen and how that worked out. Kate looked at me expectantly with tears still in her eyes and I told her the truth.

“You’ve got the wrong person. That’s way more than I can afford. I’m not rich, I’m living here on a pension. Sorry, but I can’t help you.”

She nodded and told me she understood. The fish sticks arrived and I shared them with her (see, I’m not a totally selfish bastard). She tried one and said they were dry. Well, they are fried, of course they’re dry I thought to myself, but I shrugged and said I think they taste good. She did take the leftovers with her.

Making small talk, I asked who had sponsored her (paid the P350 entry fee) at the Hash on Monday. She told me that Troy had done so. Hmm. I said maybe you should ask Troy, he might have more money than me. Yeah, that was kind of a shitty thing to do in retrospect. But on the other hand, Troy has been known to be pretty damn generous with the gals he favors, so who knows. Anyway, she finished her juice, thanked me for listening, and left. I paid the bill and departed shortly thereafter.

Next up for me was playing in the darts tournament across the street at Alley Cats. As fate would have it, I drew Troy as my partner. Naturally, I didn’t mention my earlier meeting with Kate. She had asked me not to tell anyone and I chose to respect her wishes in that regard. Troy and I both threw well and sailed into the finals. We were waiting for the losers bracket to play out so we’d know our opponent when Troy told me he was going to meet up with Kate after the tournament. Oh, how nice. And then a few minutes later, Kate showed up at Alley Cats and joined us at our table. That was a little awkward.

It still wasn’t time to play our finals match and Kate said she had a friend waiting outside who was too shy to come in and join us. I suggested Troy go outside to talk with Kate. He did so and a few minutes later rejoined me without Kate. I didn’t ask what had happened and he didn’t volunteer any information.

We then played our finals match and kicked ass.

I went home drunk and happy with my bank account intact. I’d call that a pretty good day.

And just in case you are thinking I’m a cheap Charlie, I sent a Filipina friend $60. so she could take a Valentine’s Day trip with her girlfriends. And I gave a beggar 50 pesos. While I was enjoying my lunch outdoors at Sit-n-Bull, a young woman holding a baby asked me for money. I didn’t have any small bills on me, so I shook my head and said sorry. She kept on standing there though. Then I looked up and noticed she was breastfeeding. Damn it. I went inside and got change and handed her 60 pesos. And no, I didn’t say “nice tit”, I’m not that much of a sick bastard. It was nice though.

So, there you have it. And life rolls on.

Yesterday I attended the beachside celebration of the 64th birthday of one of my fellow expatriates, Kevin. His gal and her family hosted the event and it was a nice experience to be part of a Filipino-style party. I’ve seen them numerous times from a distance and was always envious because they appear to be a simple and warm gathering with lots of smiles and good times. I wasn’t disappointed. It was quite fun. Cherry, Kevin’s girlfriend, told me that it was rather unique to have so many foreigners at what is normally a family event, and she was happy to see everyone co-mingling and enjoying themselves.

Anyway, it was a good time. Started partying a bit before 1:00 p.m. Around 6 they sent out for more beer but I’d had my fill by then and caught a trike home.

It was a nice way to end a good day.

It’s Hash Monday again so I’ll be heading out later to do my version of a Guenter trail. From the map Scott sent me it doesn’t look bad. I know the area well enough to shortcut as appropriate. I’m also going to start the trail earlier than the appointed time. Why? Because I can. I’m an American after all.

The On-Home is here at the Alta Vista community center. As is my custom I’ll be contributing a pot of chili to our food options. It seems to be quite popular with my fellow Hashers and always sells out quickly.

And that’s the way it is.

I’m sure I’ve mentioned that fine line between helping someone in need and being scammed that exists here. It’s actually more than that–generosity is often seen as evidence that you are stupid and ripe to be taken advantage of. I’m learning these hard lessons as I go and I am getting somewhat better at saying “no” these days. When I get the pleas about not having rent money or no food for the kids instead of feeling sympathy I’m more likely to ask “and why is it my responsibility to take care of that?” It’s an ongoing process though and I guess it comes with the territory when you are perceived as being “rich”, which I guess comparatively speaking, I am. I just don’t want to be an example of a fool and his money soon being parted.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I derive satisfaction from engaging in charitable activities. In fact, I’ve made the connection that giving for me satisfies an aspect of my selfish nature. Helping someone out tends to alleviate some of the guilt that comes with living large amongst those who have so little. And as regular readers know, some of my giving has come with a transactional quid pro quo element–I do for you and you do for me. Lately though, I don’t find those arrangements quite so satisfying. Maybe that’s progress of a sort.

I guess what prompted these reflections are several recent entreaties that I dispense with some cash in the service of others’ needs. The most egregious came last night in the form of a message from Jhen. I was quite surprised to hear from her as this was the first time she had contacted me since last July. Back then she was starting her college course work remotely due to the pandemic and she needed a laptop. I told that story in a post here. To recap briefly, I needed a new computer anyway and told her I’d give her my old piece of shit. Well, acquiring my upgraded unit took longer than anticipated and Jhen was desperate because classes were starting. So, I bought her a new laptop ($400.00). When it was delivered I invited her over to pick it up and had planned a lunch and movie afternoon. When she arrived though she said she couldn’t stay. Just took the computer and left. Jhen did send a couple of messages telling me how much she loved the computer and thanking me. And that’s the last time I heard from her. Until last night:

Jhenny sent Yesterday at 5:29 PM

Im not ok John…i hope you you understand me and not thingking that im taking advantage your kindness for so long not hearing from me…but i need to take my chance….and pls hear my story first

I got pregnant just the school started…unexpected cause never been pregnant for so long….i gave birth to premature son last sunday…so broke he’s 32weeks and currently incubator with oxygen….we got helps but its not enough because he needs 3 to 4weeks under observation….i need your help John…im sorry but i need to take any chances for my son’s life…..

Im dying everyday knowing my son is fighting his life in the incubator…i got complete medical records…again im sorry John but i dont have a choice….

What to do, what to do? I don’t think she’s lying about the baby. Still, I shared her story with a mutual friend (also a Filipina). Her response was: “you do know she’s married, right?” Um, no. I didn’t know that. Jhen’s marital status never came up during all the previous flirtatious chats we had between us. I know this for a fact because this morning I went back and read them all starting one year ago and never once did she mention having a husband. And then I did the math–even if the baby was born prematurely last week she knew or should have known she was pregnant at the time she was beseeching me for a laptop. That really makes me feel like a sucker. So, as sorry as I feel for her situation and as much as I hope the baby recovers, it ain’t my responsibility to pay the hospital bills. Take it up with your hubby, Jhen.

As if to underscore how I must be perceived, this morning I got a message from Reyna, a girl I’ve chatted with briefly through a dating site, and she begged me for some financial support because her cousin died. Well, that’s an easy one for me. I have a pretty firm rule that I NEVER send cash to anyone I’ve not met in person. I just block them and go on with my life. No big loss there.

Well, on Friday I did give money ($60.00) to someone I don’t know. An acquaintance (Irene, the woman I buy my meat from) contacted me asking if I knew anyone looking for a maid. I didn’t but said I was still looking to hire a replacement masseuse. She advised that her friend didn’t have any massage training. Oh well. Irene then explained that her friend was desperate because she had no money to feed her kids. I told Irene that if she was vouching for the validity of her friend’s needs, I would make a one-time donation on her behalf. I guess she talked to her friend and then relayed the message that her friend was willing to come and service whatever needs I might have (hint hint) in lieu of a massage. Hold on to your seats, dear readers: I declined the offer. To begin, this woman is a complete stranger to me (Irene did share a picture of her though–she’s fairly attractive), and I’m just not into getting intimate with someone I don’t know. That’s why I like the massage route–it is a legitimate way to be physical and if the chemistry is right, you can go from there. The other problem I had was that the money was allegedly for the purpose of feeding her family. It didn’t feel right to me to expect or accept something physical in return for my charitable donation. I don’t know what the fuck has gotten into me! Is this leopard actually changing his spots?

Or maybe I’ve just learned Rule #1 left by Kevin Kim in the comments of the post linked above:

…remember Rule #1: don’t be a sucker when women come a-pleading. You won’t be making any real difference that way; you’re just a corpse being plucked at by crows. Making a difference should be about proceeding from a sense of self-worth, i.e., from a position of strength and dignity; it shouldn’t be about trying to find a sense of self-worth. You’re already worthy, good sir, so don’t turn your gestures of charity into a subtle form of begging.

Yeah, I’m getting there. Hopefully.

So yesterday we took a longish drive (45 minutes) out to Castillejos for a new hiking adventure–the climb to Nagsangong Falls. None of us, including the old-timers like Scott, had ever made this trip. In fact, I just tried to search for Nagsangong and Google has never heard of it either. I guess Scott had found a map to the place or got referred from a friend of the girlfriend or something, but anyway it’s always nice to explore new territory.

We had a bit of a false start at the beginning and wound up in a rice field. The farmer family was very friendly and pointed us in the right direction. So we turned around and started over. Still, it wasn’t a bad journey at all. 10K or so to the falls and back and a 150-meter climb that was very gradual and not at all difficult. My kind of hike!

Here are the photos:

It was a long day. We stopped for lunch on the way back and I didn’t get home until a little after 3:00. No time for a nap, just a shower and headed out for Friday night darts.

And so ended another fine day in paradise.

But I repeat myself, or at least I repeated a good portion of Monday’s Hash trail. Partly in reverse. Here’s how it went down:

We only had three walkers on Wednesday and Dan took the lead. Led us up a steep hill and at the top, we intersected with the last portion of the trail I helped lay as a Hare. Except we did the downhill part going up this time. Ironic in a way, on Monday as I was slip-sliding down I thought to myself “at least I’m not having to climb this fucker”. Oh well. We did take a different route down the other side and wanted to find a new way up for the second climb. The path we took once again led us to Monday’s trail. I guess it was destiny. We did at least come back down a different way. All in all a little longer than the Hash trail but still a pleasant day to be out and about.

You can Relive the adventure here if you so desire:

What else? Well, three years ago I was enjoying this for dinner:

And it is nice to see that sleepy Joe is in good hands:

That’s all for today. Time for my singles league dart match!