Happy Leap Year, everyone! I’m not sure if that’s even a thing. I’ve not even heard this 29th day of February mentioned in passing. Oh well, only four years until the next one.

I celebrated Leap Year’s Eve with a night out on the town. I wasn’t feeling like playing darts, and with nothing better to do I changed things up by attending the SOB dance contest. This week’s venue was Man Cave and there was a full house:

The man on the left in the photo above is Dave Fisher, a legend here in Barretto. He owns several of the bars and at least one hotel that I know of. At the Aftermath event in Rum Jungle, Dave joined me at my table and we had a very enjoyable chat. Dave’s a licensed physician who prior to retirement worked for a large pharmaceutical company in Europe. He still maintains a residence in Amsterdam and splits his Philippines time between Manila and Barretto. The guy is in his mid-seventies and shows no sign of slowing down at all. Had a great time hanging out with him.

All that activity kept me out later than normal and I’d been drinking SML’s (Zero was out of stock again). I had intended to walk home, but a few steps down the highway I thought better of it and summoned a trike. I’d spent enough time walking that damn highway the past couple of days. Why push my luck?

Today’s “interesting” photo comes from my afternoon walk yesterday:

The good news is I can probably mark myself safe from the Wuhan virus:

Speaking of the worldwide epidemic that is bound to kill us all, still not much happening here in the Philippines. Or at least, nothing much is being reported. They have however banned entrance from Korea now, so if any of my old friends from there were planning a surprise visit, you’ll need to change your plans. For now at least.

That’s it for now. I’ve got some walking to do.

For my morning walk, I went the opposite direction on the National Highway towards Olongapo City. It’s a bit dangerous in the face of oncoming Friday traffic, but I was feeling suicidal brave. Made it to the Kalakayan gate of the old Navy base, then turned around walked back to Barretto on the beach.

I know, I know. You are asking yourself “does this guy do anything besides walk?” Why, yes. Yes, I do! Last night I went out on a little lonely bar crawl. Even visited a new (to me) place called Captain’s Arms. Turns out the manager there is the ex-girlfriend of one of our Hashers. She gave me a warm welcome which was nice.

So, in addition to Captain’s Arms, I visited Out Back, Cheap Charlies, and finished up at Queen Victoria. Went home with my brain sufficiently numbed to enjoy a peaceful sleep.

What else besides walking and drinking? Well, I found this grammatical question somewhat interesting:

It seems lately I’ve been finishing my daily post here with a funny meme take on politics. How about this:

Alright, time to do some afternoon steps. What about tonight? Well, a big thank you to Kevin Kim for providing me a useful tool in making that decision:

Carefree highway, let me slip away on you
Carefree highway, you seen better days
The morning after blues from my head down to my shoes
Carefree highway, let me slip away, slip away on you

–Gordon Lightfoot

Feeling down in the dumps this morning so I headed out for a long walk to Subic town and back.

For whatever reason, I’d never actually done this walk before. I guess there is just not that much of interest to me in Subic. But I was curious about what this store may be like:

Nothing like a Wal-Mart back home though. It was actually more mall-like, with several shops and eateries. The Waltermart itself was a grocery store.

The “interesting” photo from the walk would be this example of riverside living:

Anyway, it’s been quite a while since I’ve done walk this long without a break. I was tired at the end, but maybe slightly more right in the head.

I’ll leave you with some words of wisdom from a dog’s perspective:

It’s the bitches you gotta look out for.

The ladies come to see you
If your name still rings a bell
They give you damn near nothin’
And they’ll say they knew you well
So you tell ’em you’ll remember
But they know it’s just a game
And along the way their faces
All begin to look the same
And when you stop to let ’em know
You got it down
It’s just another town along the road

Another day, another hike. Hey, it’s what I do. When I’m not drinking beer anyway. Today I met up with the remains of the Wednesday Walkers. Günter has run that group into the ground with his insane marathons and only a few die-hards remain. My Hash buddy Scott and I had already decided what we were going to do and figured we’d invite anyone who cared for a sane walk to join us. Turns out Günter was a no show, so the seven of us set off for our adventure.

We caught a bus out to Castillejos, 12 kilometers or so down the highway. And then we commenced walking.

So, we had intended to go up over the mountain and down into Philseco. But when we commenced climbing a local warned us that the way we were attempting was not easy. He was strident enough in his entreaty to turn around that four of us did. Almoranus the German and two others insisted on going forward. And we haven’t seen them since. Us that remained instituted Plan B, which was to walk around the valley and circle back to Castillejos.

At some point, we lost the path and had to wing it a bit. And it turns out we had to do a water crossing. Well, actually, we had to do three water crossings. But once your shoes are wet, does it really matter?

And that was today’s walkabout. Just under 7K all told. Enjoyed the scenery and the company.

I’ll close with a little bit of politics in the form of a meme if you don’t mind:

I’m out on the highways and byways, up in the hills, and passing through some sketchy areas on a regular basis. But it seems the most dangerous place I experience is right here at home.

So, I’m heading into the kitchen and have a sudden sneezing fit. Which caused me to somehow lose balance and stumble into that baseboard corner.

I’m not sure if there is any significance to the fact that only the middle toe was impacted, but it seemed like a big “fuck you” somehow. This happened prior to the Hash and I wasn’t sure if there would be any effect on my hiking. Turns out I only felt pain when going downhill. It seems fine today though.

Yesterday’s Hash was nothing to complain about, which coming from me is a pretty big deal. It was, in fact, Saturday’s trail in reverse, but since I’d only done the flat portion then most of the hike was new to me.

It was a pretty uneventful Hash, but I had a little incident when it was over. The on-home was in Calapadayan, about 5K from Barretto. I wasn’t about to walk the highway at night, especially after drinking quite a few beers. I also didn’t want to wait for the Hashmobile to be loaded up and ready to go. Instead, I opted for a Jeepney ride back home. About three-quarters of the way there I had an “oh shit!” moment, realizing I had left my hat and walking stick on the table back at Hunters. I called out “para po!” (stop please), hopped out of the Jeepney, crossed the highway, and quickly caught a Jeepney going in the opposite direction. Made it back in time to retrieve my stuff and catch the Hashmobile back to Barretto. I had the driver drop me at the road leading to Alta Vista, and hopped out. As I was walking home I experienced another “oh shit!” moment. I had left my phone in the truck. So, I started running back up the highway hoping I’d catch the truck on its way back. And not too far up the road the Hashmobile was pulled over letting some other Hashers out. They had my phone in hand and were having a good laugh at my drunken expense. I’m sure I’ll spend time on the ice next week for littering. Ah well, nothing lost at least.

And so ended another adventurous day. I hope you enjoyed the re-telling. I found a handy little guide I use to hopefully improve the quality of my writing.

And the toe jam football I played reminded me of the song that bears my Hash name:

He wear no shoeshine
He got toe jam football
He got monkey finger
He shoot Coca-Cola
He say I know you, you know me
One thing I can tell you is
You got to be free
Cum together, right now
Over me

And I am very lucky that it didn’t result in a broken neck!

Things always happen when you least expect them it seems. A typical morning. One minute I’m sitting in front of my computer. Then I lean back in my chair and hear a loud *snap*. Next thing I know I’m clutching at the desktop to avoid cascading backward onto the floor.

No other injuries. Looks like I’m in the market for a new office chair though.

Walked my Hash trail for next Monday this morning. I’m going to call it “The 69er”–a 6K hike for the lazy bastards and a 9K for the runners. One climb at the beginning, a meandering trail incorporating a lot of My Bitch, then down into the valley for some flatland walking. I like it!

Anyway, it should be a good safe and sane trail.

I’ll offer up this photo for today’s “interesting” feature:

Now, here’s a Democratic ticket that would be hard to beat stop laughing at:

I guess after Nevada it is going to be hard to stop Bernie though.

I’ve got the Hash this afternoon. Leech My Nuggets is the Hare. He told me he’s basically doing the same trail he laid for the Manila guys, just in reverse. Well, I’m up for one of those mountains anyway. As long as I have a leg to stand on.

Anyway, nothing to write home about, yet here I am.

Did my first run with the Manila Hash House Harriers. Nothing really remarkable about the trail, since it was pretty much a Subic Hare’s work. There were too many Hashers at the on-home to fit in the truck, so me and another Subic Hasher walked from Treasure Island out to the start of the short trail. The mountains were both on the long trail as it turns out, so we pretty much had a boring and flat 5K trail. But that’s okay, I got my steps in.

The circle was conducted at Hot Zone and the Manila rituals are similar to what we do, but there is no ice involved. To be honest it was kinda blah, mainly because I didn’t know any of the individuals being recognized. And again, with no women in the group, there weren’t even any pleasant distractions. Well, I take that back. We had four waitresses to serve our beers. And they all worked topless. Two of them were actually quite attractive. And I bought one of those two a couple of lady drinks and she sat pleasantly at my side for most of the proceedings. So there was that.

Went to Alley Cats after the Hash and the night ended on a sour note for me there. When will I learn? I certainly don’t have any room for bargirl drama in my life right now. Time for some new shit I suppose.

What else? Well, things can always be worse. Like this guy:

Speaking of fools and their money soon being parted, the thought of this guy getting the Democrat nomination is mind-boggling. But he appears to be on a roll.

Ah, the “tit for tat” title reminds me of this story from my working days. We were in a class about sexual harassment (not a how-to, but a not to) and the instructor was talking about the quid pro quo type of harassment. Someone in the class asked him what that meant and he responded, you know, tit for tat. We all cracked up even though he hadn’t intended his remark to be funny.

Ah well, time marches on and so do I. Time for an afternoon stroll.

I’ve now completed another first here in the Philippines with a visit to the dentist. It was pretty consistent with what I’ve experienced in the two other countries where I’ve had someone looking down in my mouth. My first impression was generally positive because they had me complete a medical history questionnaire, including inquiries about drug allergies. Thankfully, I don’t have any but it has always been disconcerting when I’ve seen a doctor here who gives me shots and meds and doesn’t think (or care enough) to ask if I might have a fatal reaction to the drugs.

The dentist (sorry, I’ve already forgotten his name) had a small facility but it appeared relatively up to date. He didn’t take any x-rays which was a little surprising. Not sure if he even had that capability. I told him I’d lost a filling and that was his examination focus, not even a cursory check for cavities or other potential problems in my other teeth. After digging around in the problem tooth a bit he told me it was fractured and that with a filling I’d likely still experience pain. He recommended extracting the tooth and I asked about a root canal and crown instead. According to him, the fracture precluded that course of action, but I could get an implant after the extraction if I wanted.

Hmm. I know in the USA extracting a tooth is always the last option. Judging by the smiles of many of the Filipinos I meet pulling teeth seems to be the preferred way to deal with dental issues here. Well, I hadn’t been experiencing any pain in the fractured tooth even without a filling, so I told him to just fill it and see what happens. And so he did. Took about 30 minutes all told and cost me a mere P2,200 ($44.). So far I’m still pain-free and I have one less hole in my head. I’d call that a win!

I came home and decided to celebrate by firing up my seldom used grill.

After my meal, I headed back into town to participate in the dart tourney at Alley Cats. Along the way, I encountered one of those uniquely Philippines moments.

They’ve recently built an extra lane on the National Highway going through town. People are still parking in what used to be the shoulder of the road, negating whatever benefit the extra lane provided in easing traffic congestion. So, the local barangay officials took action by setting up “no parking” signs up and down the highway. Of course, they placed them in the middle of the lane so people still can’t use the roadway as intended. I actually laughed out loud when I saw this.

Finished second in the dart tourney. Steve, the Englishman who doesn’t drink, drew Alan, one of the other top players as a partner, so it was pretty much a foregone conclusion that they would be unstoppable. And they were. I wasn’t playing my best game but my partner Anabel (one of the bargirls at Alley Cats) was throwing surprisingly good darts, making second place all the more satisfying.

I’m not sure what it is about the litter that captures my attention, but I’ll offer up this trashy shot from my morning walk for today’s “interesting” photo feature:

Another adventure on tap for this afternoon. The Manila Hashers are in Barretto for their annual out-of-town events. They started last night with a bar crawl, but I was otherwise occupied. I’m going to do their Hash run this afternoon and see how that goes. Leech My Nuggets helped the Manila Hare (Nancy Boy) set the trail. I expect it will be a tough one. I know we are going to start in Subic-town and finish at Hot Zone in Barretto. I’m guessing that will involve climbing two different mountains. Unless I shortcut. We’ll see how it goes. Oh, and interestingly, the Manila Hash doesn’t allow females to participate. I think that sucks, to be honest. I appreciate the view more with a sexy Filipina on the trail.

And there you have another glimpse into my so-called life.

So, yesterday I decided to change things up a little and bust out of my normal daily routines. Hopped in a Jeepney and rode it out to Barangay Kalaklan, for the whopping fare of 13 pesos (26 cents). From there I hoofed it to the old Navy base, continued on and through Harbor Point mall, and then arrived at my ultimate destination: SM Mall Olongapo City. Not to be confused with SM Mall Central, about a mile away.

I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before but there is a “mall culture” in the Philippines, unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. In the USA malls are going bankrupt and closing down, apparently everyone shops at Amazon these days. But here the malls serve as a social gathering place and they seem to always be busy. Somewhat odd in a country that is so relatively poor. Even the poor folks though can enjoy free air conditioning (that was running so smoothly after regular hvac services) and wifi I suppose.

Anyway, I personally very rarely go to the mall, and when I do go I’m in-and-out as quickly as possible. I went to SM Mall because I wanted some things that I thought might be most convenient to find in a large department store, as opposed to shopping around in the specialty shops. Yesterday’s trip was prompted by the realization that the clothing I brought with me from Korea and/or my last trip to the states is finally wearing out.

I was only going to buy two pair but when I got to the checkout the cashier told me they had a promotion going on where I would get P200 in coupons for every P2200 that I spent. Hmm, so I grabbed the third pair of shorts.

I recall shopping in the states and struggling to find anyone to assist me. Here they have tons of sales help and they were almost as aggressive as a thirsty bargirl. Almost. Anyway, they were very helpful in finding the sizes and colors I was looking for. I would much rather have too much assistance than not enough that’s for sure!

I told you it was an exciting day! Glad I was able to bring you along to share in it.

What else? Well, Facebook reminds that it was ten years ago that my nephew Justin experienced Itaewon for the first time.

A peaceful morning walk. Even the National Highway was unusually quiet.

I’ll offer up this for today’s “interesting” photograph:

I think I figured out why I’m having such a hard time giving up ice cream:

Here’s a shot of my boys out back guarding the neighbor’s chickens.

I’m not sure I’ve ever posted a Gif here before, let’s see if this one works:

It worked! Now I’m REALLY excited! And there is even more excitement to come. I’ve got my first dental appointment here this afternoon. Nothing major, I had a filling fall out. Then again, this is the Philippines so we’ll see what happens.

Stay tuned!

As Kris Kristofferson sang long ago, “nothin’ ain’t worth nothin’, but it’s free.” I hope you’ll generously apply the same philosophy to this worthless post. Here goes:

A third-place finish in darts last night. Considering that both me and my partner were off our games that was a better than expected outcome. And yes, I lost to Steve, the Englishman who doesn’t drink. Ah well.

Now, in that paragraph above my Grammarly app is saying I should have written “both I and my partner”. Maybe so, but I don’t like the way that looks or sounds, so sue me if I won’t change it.

In the comments to my previous post, I learned that what little I thought I knew about French was wrong. Not really surprising seeing as how I have not even mastered the English language quite yet. I was reminded of that fact earlier when I came upon this passage on a forum I frequent:

The main official language is Filipino, though there are many regional dialects. You’ll find learning a Philippine language somewhat harder than Thai. They use the Latin alphabet, which helps, but they have a peculiar grammatical system (ergative/absolutive) which is hard for a westerner used to subjective/objective grammar to understand. It’s worth the effort though. Begin with about 20 phrases and 200 words of vocabulary and take it from there.

I have no clue what is meant by ergative or absolutive. Ergo, I’m absolutely sure that my very limited Tagalog (maybe five phrases and fifty words) won’t be showing much improvement anytime soon. That’s my subjective opinion at least, objectionable though it may be. (See what I did there? Man, I crack myself up sometimes!)

Notwithstanding the poor nature of my grammatical health, physically speaking I seem to be doing pretty well of late. This morning my blood pressure was a near-perfect 120/80. My resting heart rate was at 59 beats per minute, and my sleep score is also much improved. My focus now needs to be getting my weight down from the current 205 to something closer to 195. I haven’t gone full keto yet, but I’m trying to get by with two meals a day. It is my ice cream addiction that is tough to beat. That and the beer. We’ll see.

Alright, have you had just about enough of nothin’ yet? Good, me too! Let me leave you with today’s “interesting” walking photo:

Freedom’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose,
And nothin’ ain’t worth nothin’ but it’s free,
Feelin’ good was easy, Lord, when Bobby sang the blues,
And buddy, that was good enough for me,
Good enough for me and my Bobby McGee.

A slow news day here in my little town so let me tell you what’s cooking:

Today’s “interesting” walk photograph:

Les choses de la vie. Impressed with my French? Don’t be, just something I came across in my internet wanderings today. The choices life makes for you. I guess that resonated because it aligned with some of what I was thinking as I walked this morning. I don’t want to cede control of my choices in life to chance or fate, but would I have chosen the life I’m living now had circumstances not created the “opportunity”? Yeah, all this time later I’m still thinking about what I had and what I lost. Which is not to say I’m unhappy with this life I’m living now. It is what it is and I’m making the best of it. Knowing me, if I was somehow magically carried back to that old life I’d probably find myself missing this one. Best to just accept les choses de la vie.

My internet travels also encountered a brief mention of a collection of Buddhist inspired short stories by a venerable Monk titled: Un arbre dans la forêt (The Tree that Hides the Forest). The only quotation offered from that book seemed to underscore my thinking:

Be mindful, don’t hang on to things but let go and surrender to the way things are.

I’m getting there. One step at a time.

Regarding yesterday’s Hash–I swear I will never complain about one of Günter’s trails again. I know this to be true because I will NEVER hike one again. I was leaning that way anyway, but still feeling chastened by my cowardice in Baguio, I decided I’d take a chance. I was encouraged by the fact that we were walking out instead of driving, so I figured I could easily bail whenever I’d had enough. Well, it didn’t turn out that way. Here’s how it went down:

Alright, so I’m thinking this isn’t going to be so bad. I was contemplating the possibilities of where we might start climbing from here, and I knew of two likely trails. But I was wrong about that. Once we got into Marian Hills, the marked path had us enter a dry creekbed. I’m thinking what the hell? So, I continue on and it was pretty disgusting. People had been using the creek as a trash receptacle and it was littered with all kinds of garbage, including a significant number of used diapers. It was literally a shit creek.

And then things took a turn for the worse. Or should I say that Günter didn’t disappoint? The creek bed turned into a steep uphill climb that required crawling up and over boulders.

But yes he did. Part of the climb up actually required a rope that the Hares gleefully provided. Bastards! Well, too late to turn back now.

We all got to the top without injury. I was pissed though. And then we almost immediately started a steep and slippery downhill trek. One guy eventually gave up trying to keep his feet and slid down on his ass. My walking stick served its intended dual purpose of keeping my balance and being my brake.

Once we reached the bottom there were only four of us left in my group (I had waited on the elderly guy and his wife to make sure they made it down okay). I recognized that the trail was going to go up again through a different, albeit not as steep, creekbed. We were nearly an hour and a half into the hike at this point so I asked if anyone wanted to shortcut the trail. There was hearty and unanimous agreement with my suggestion. So, shortcut we did! Made it back on-home at Treasure Island at 5:30 after our abbreviated 6K hike.

I saw Bush Diver at Treasure Island and asked what he thought of the trail. He commented that it “separated the real Hashers from the wannabes.” I told him I disagreed because a real Hasher wouldn’t put other Hashers in unnecessary danger. He just walked off. Later in the circle when we provide our customary feedback to the Hares, Bush Diver repeated his comment about “real Hashers” and bragged that he had done the whole trail. Yeah, because someone was there to pull his ass up off a cliff. What a fucking cunt. And speaking of cunts:

I’ve had all the shit from you guys I’m gonna take. I’m thinking whenever you next Hare I’ll offer up a “safe and sane”alternative trail. We’ll see who the “real Hashers” are then I suppose.

Oh well. There is a Hash song that seems appropriate to the occasion:

Melody: 
Auld Lang Syne

Lyrics:
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off

Baguio city that is. There’s a lot to like about Baguio, especially if you enjoy mountain vistas. It’s a green city with lots of forests, parks, and flowers. It’s the only place in the Philippines I’ve been where they emphasize protecting the environment. Still too much litter, but much cleaner than my home town. The poverty is not so much in your face here either. I’m thinking they move the squatters, shanties, and shacks outside the city limits. The infrastructure is also much better with generally wider streets and wonder of wonders, sidewalks! It’s a cool town too. Never seen so many sweaters and long-sleeved shirts since I made the move from Korea. I also saw quite a few locals out jogging which is pretty much unheard of in my area. Baguio is also a tourist destination and the summer home of the Filipino government. So it has quite a bit to offer in the way of accommodations, restaurants, and the like. All in all, a pretty fine city.

Would I ever want to live in Baguio? No, not really. I enjoy my annual visits, but honestly, that’s enough. It’s just too isolated for my tastes, and that trip up and down the mountain on a dicey two-lane road is potentially a killer. No real airport there either. I’m spoiled I guess by small-town life. I can walk from end to end of Barretto in about twenty minutes. And in that space, I can find numerous restaurants, beach resorts, and of course, bars. Baguio has all that (except beaches of course) but it is spread out over a wide area. Even as a walkaholic I’d need to cab almost everywhere I wanted to go. Just not the lifestyle I’m looking for these days.

I’ve got some pictures:

So, one of the other Hashers from Subic posted his photos from the trail I chickened bailed out on. Damn, it looked like a great hike. But I was afraid the bridge crossing I was warned about would be like this one:

Here’s the bridge from Saturday’s Hash:

Well, I fucked up. Shouldn’t have wussed out on the trail. Lesson learned I guess.

Anyway, I have another Hash today. And Günter is the Hare. What could go wrong? Stay tuned.

Acrophobia? Gephyrophobia? Or maybe just plain old being a chickenshit? Back home safe and sound but thinking I shouldn’t be so risk-averse. Here’s the tale from yesterday’s Hash in the mountains of Baguio.

So, there was a long 9K runners trail, a 6K trail for those who preferred something shorter, and a “VIP” trail for folks who aren’t into a strenuous hike. My plan was to do the 6K which is appropriate for my speed. And then when the Hare was providing pre-departure instructions he made this comment: “Any of you on the 6K trail who have vertigo may want to go with the 9k instead, as there is a ‘hanging’ bridge to cross on the shorter trail.

Well, damn. On the trip up I had seen some real dicey looking pedestrian suspension bridges over large and deep chasms. I was thinking at the time “no way!” I also recalled the time I had to bail out on a river crossing here because I couldn’t deal with the scary and unstable bridge. So I was faced with a dilemma. We were going to be driven out and dropped off somewhere. If I was unable to make it over the bridge because of my cowardice I’d be stuck. The on-home was going to be somewhere out in the sticks as well, so even if I managed to find a way back to the hotel I wouldn’t be with the Hash group. And I just wasn’t feeling up to a 9K hike that the Hare described as “challenging”. What to do?

Years ago I had read a book called “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway”. And so yesterday I felt the fear and did the VIP trail instead. Well, a modified version of the VIP trail.

I’ve got some photos from my morning in Baguio that I’ll share with y’all tomorrow. It’s a very nice city in many ways and I’ll talk about some of those things as well.

Greetings from Baguio, the mountain kingdom of the Philippines! Or at least the summer capital of the government. The American Embassy even maintains a residence here. Anyway, it’s a beautiful city covered in pine trees. It honestly feels like a different world up here compared to what I’m used to down by the water.

An uneventful 3+ hour drive to get here, and knowing my driver, that’s a good thing. Last night I got pre-registered for today’s Hash and then got drunk. The floored kind. Come to think of it, the last time I got floored was here in Baguio one year ago. Maybe it’s the altitude.

Anyway, that’s about all I have to report. Here’s a couple of photos from the trip:

Oh, and the other thing is that it’s freakin’ chilly up here. I should have remembered that from the last trip and brought a light jacket or sweater. Everyone else did. Oh well. I should be fine while I’m hiking.

Full report tomorrow (assuming I survive).

Er, I mean witness. Yep, I finally got my time in front of the Barangay officials to explain what went down on that ill-fated boat ride.

Jeff (the accused) asked us all to report to the Barangay office at 1:00. And then we waited twenty minutes or so for the officiants to return from lunch break. Ah yes, they were on Filipino time. When I looked in the door I saw Resa and Hana along with their friend Eva, another participant on the boat trip, also waiting. I stayed outside until called upon.

I wasn’t sure what format the proceeding would take, one on one or as a group, but once called inside a conference room with a large table, I observed that Resa, Hana, and Eva were on one side, with two barangay officials at one end and a third on the other. Jeff had a total of six witnesses and we all crowded in on the other side of the table.

Based on my seating choice, I was called on first to give my account of events. To summarize, I stated the following:

Resa and Hana were both very drunk, having been drinking heavily from four bottles of Emperador rum all afternoon. When it was time to depart, Resa walked out on the narrow bow of the boat giving every indication she intended to jump off. The boat crew would not proceed with her not seated. So Jeff grabbed Resa and held her down in the bottom of the boat while others tried to get a life jacket on her. She continued to resist, so finally, Jeff released her and went back to his seat. At no time did Jeff punch, hit, choke, or otherwise harm Resa as alleged.

The other five witnesses for Jeff all stated pretty much the same thing. In support of Resa, Eva testified that there was no suicide attempt. She claimed that Resa merely wanted to pee. Eva claimed that Jeff had been unnecessarily rough and held Resa down in a chokehold. Whatever Hana said, she said in Tagalog so I have no clue. Resa didn’t say shit.

With witness testimony concluded the head of the Barangay delegation spoke. She told Resa that the people present were not strangers, rather they were individuals who cared about her well-being and did not want to see her get hurt. Next, she told us foreigners that we should not have intervened. If someone has to physically restrain a Filipino we should have another Filipino do so. Then she turned to Jeff and asked him if he would consider offering an apology. Jeff said he was sorry his actions had been misunderstood and sorry that he had gotten involved in trying to protect Resa. He promised he would never do so again.

And that was pretty much it for us. Apparently, there will be a final mediation session next week. The witnesses were advised that our services were no longer needed and we were excused.

So yeah, it was all basically a bunch of bullshit. If Resa proceeds with a criminal complaint I may have to testify again. I can’t believe that she will still pursue that course in the face of what she heard yesterday. Then again, she has demonstrated that she is crazy as a loon.

In happier news, I went out this morning with Pubic Head and Blow My Pipe to scout our upcoming (March 2) Hash trail. They let me take the lead and liked what I showed them. Still a couple of wrinkles to iron out, but we should have a nice “sane” trail of 6K with a 9K version for the runners. One climb and the rest gently rolling or flat. My kind of trail!

For today’s “interesting” photo, I offer you the Department of Education’s Vision statement, as painted on a wall outside Barretto National High School:

I’m really happy to see that the President is not holding any grudge against Mitt Romney:

And at the risk of being accused of virtue signaling, I want to share with you my no meat commitment.

And that’s all I’ve got for now.

…but I ain’t geriatric. Yet.

Yesterday’s so-called “Geriatric Hash” is in the books. And given my bitching the last couple of weeks about trails that were just plain outrageous I’m loathe to complain about this one. Much.

So here goes: The Hares did two trails–one for geriatrics and one for “runners”. I opted for the longer runners trail knowing in advance where most of it went. And as it turned out it was exactly the route I use for one of my regular morning walks. In fact, it was my Saturday morning walk this week and that’s how I discovered the portion of the trail that had already been marked.

And as it turned out only three of us managed to complete the runner’s trail. All those big strong guys who usually leave me in their dust were nowhere to be seen yesterday. Because they lost the trail. Yes, it was poorly marked. And to exacerbate matters, the Hares hadn’t bothered to erase or modify Hash markings from previous runs. So the majority of runners followed an old trail and by the time they figured out the error of their ways they said “fuck it” and kept on going. I avoided that fate simply because I had already seen where the true trail lay. Of course, me being a slowpoke I couldn’t share that bit of knowledge before the fast group made a wrong turn. Oh well.

And in less than an hour I was On-Done. So that allowed more time for beer drinking prior to the circle. As the Hash secretary noted, we were losing money on this run because beer consumption was WAY up.

Oh, I got a new Hash shirt last night. A commemorative jersey from our ill-fated encounter with the Philippine Navy.

And the close-ups…

Accolades to Moaner for a creative design. And yes, I notice the spelling/typo error of “unGodly”. On the other hand, our captors didn’t give us any gold, so in that sense it’s correct.

For today’s “interesting” photo, let me offer this:

And that’s today’s report. Günter is the Hare next week so I expect a trail at the other extreme from yesterday. There’s nothing to be done about it, other than for me to potentially boycott the Hares that are just intentionally outrageous. Well, I’m going to set an example on the trail I Hare next month. I may even give it a name: The Sane Hash. One climb and 6-7 kilometers long. Plenty of flat, but off the payment and out in the scenic beauty of our surrounding countryside. If my fellow Hashers don’t like it all I can say is “fuck off!”. Damn, I really AM a grumpy old man!

An update on the Barangay situation coming tomorrow, such as it is.

I attended the annual VFW beauty pageant yesterday afternoon. Arrived a bit too late to get a great seat (last year I was a judge), but it was still an enjoyable diversion visually. The beer wasn’t cold and no Zero, but I made do with San Mig Light and a glass of ice.

What’s that? You want to see some photos of the lovely ladies? I think I have a couple here. Hold on.

Anyway, it was something different and I was happy to support the work done by the VFW folks. In addition to helping out veterans in need, they do a lot of community charity. Things like purchasing wheelchairs or medical expenses for needy children.

As interesting as those photos of LBFMs above may be, they weren’t seen on my walk. So, I’ll submit this one for today’s “interesting” feature submission:

I’ve mentioned before how Lucky finds the oddest sleeping positions. When I saw him like this last night it cracked me up:

That’s all for this time. Thanks for dropping by!