Regarding yesterday’s Hash–I swear I will never complain about one of Günter’s trails again. I know this to be true because I will NEVER hike one again. I was leaning that way anyway, but still feeling chastened by my cowardice in Baguio, I decided I’d take a chance. I was encouraged by the fact that we were walking out instead of driving, so I figured I could easily bail whenever I’d had enough. Well, it didn’t turn out that way. Here’s how it went down:

Alright, so I’m thinking this isn’t going to be so bad. I was contemplating the possibilities of where we might start climbing from here, and I knew of two likely trails. But I was wrong about that. Once we got into Marian Hills, the marked path had us enter a dry creekbed. I’m thinking what the hell? So, I continue on and it was pretty disgusting. People had been using the creek as a trash receptacle and it was littered with all kinds of garbage, including a significant number of used diapers. It was literally a shit creek.

And then things took a turn for the worse. Or should I say that Günter didn’t disappoint? The creek bed turned into a steep uphill climb that required crawling up and over boulders.

But yes he did. Part of the climb up actually required a rope that the Hares gleefully provided. Bastards! Well, too late to turn back now.

We all got to the top without injury. I was pissed though. And then we almost immediately started a steep and slippery downhill trek. One guy eventually gave up trying to keep his feet and slid down on his ass. My walking stick served its intended dual purpose of keeping my balance and being my brake.

Once we reached the bottom there were only four of us left in my group (I had waited on the elderly guy and his wife to make sure they made it down okay). I recognized that the trail was going to go up again through a different, albeit not as steep, creekbed. We were nearly an hour and a half into the hike at this point so I asked if anyone wanted to shortcut the trail. There was hearty and unanimous agreement with my suggestion. So, shortcut we did! Made it back on-home at Treasure Island at 5:30 after our abbreviated 6K hike.

I saw Bush Diver at Treasure Island and asked what he thought of the trail. He commented that it “separated the real Hashers from the wannabes.” I told him I disagreed because a real Hasher wouldn’t put other Hashers in unnecessary danger. He just walked off. Later in the circle when we provide our customary feedback to the Hares, Bush Diver repeated his comment about “real Hashers” and bragged that he had done the whole trail. Yeah, because someone was there to pull his ass up off a cliff. What a fucking cunt. And speaking of cunts:

I’ve had all the shit from you guys I’m gonna take. I’m thinking whenever you next Hare I’ll offer up a “safe and sane”alternative trail. We’ll see who the “real Hashers” are then I suppose.

Oh well. There is a Hash song that seems appropriate to the occasion:

Melody: 
Auld Lang Syne

Lyrics:
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt
Fuck off, you cunt, Fuck off