Are you bored?

Posted on 06/April/2019 by John McCrarey

“You can appreciate Schubert if you train yourself. I was the same way when I first listened to him—it bored me silly. It’s only natural for someone your age. In time you’ll appreciate it. People soon get tired of things that aren’t boring, but not of what is boring. Go figure. For me, I might have the leisure to be bored, but not to grow tired of something. Most people can’t distinguish between the two.”
— Haruki Murakami

If you are visiting LTG on a regular basis then chances are you are indeed bored out of your mind. And if you are not bored now you likely will be after reading this post. I’m only half-kidding when I say that people like my blog because it makes them feel better about their own lives.

Anyway, Althouse was blogging about boredom today. She included a link to a long and boring Wikipedia article on boredom. There is also this quiz you can take to discover how easily you get bored. My result was that I have an average propensity to become bored. So nothing to get excited about I suppose.

I’ve been retired now going on one year. Do I find my life boring? Surprisingly, and notwithstanding the drivel I post here, for the most part no, I do not. I have my daily routines and rituals and they pass the time, however comfortably and well*. I wake each morning at 0600, spend some time on the internets, walk the dogs, have breakfast, walk myself, take a nap, try to blog here, take another walk, shower, drink beer/throw darts, then sleep around 10 p.m. Every fucking day of my life. Well, sometimes I’ll travel and do the above in a new location. And I am plotting some international travel in the coming months.

Is that enough? For now it has to be. Could it be better? Hell yes! For example, I’d love to have someone to love and share my life with. But I’m not really able to open myself up to the pain and disappointment that potentially comes with the love thing just yet. As I often remind myself, there are worse things than being alone

**This pretty much captures how I fee**l.

Had a brief and drunken text chat with the last woman I loved yesterday. She told me she has chosen to be happy in life and that “happiness is within”. Well, if that works for her I’m glad. But it smells like bullshit to me. Don’t get me wrong, I am not unhappy. I am content with this life I have chosen. I have all I need to live comfortably and worry-free. Living here is a daily reminder that my first world problems truly are meaningless.

**I’m not dead inside quite yet. And I hope to keep it that way**!

I can’t control what the people around me do or how they choose to live their life. What I can control is who I let into MY life. Unfortunately, I’ve demonstrated an amazing inability to judge the true nature of another person’s character. So I’m often disappointed and frequently taken advantage of by so-called friends. I know who I am and what is in my heart and I’ll continue to live my life in a manner that in some small way might make a difference. I’ll do unto others not as they’ve done unto me. I’m bound to have some good Karma coming my way eventually.

Man oh man, talk about going off on a tangent. Bored yet?

Let’s get back on track. Facebook reminded me that two years ago I was meeting the U.S. Ambassador to Korea.

***And giving the clenched fist salute My Way!***

I enjoyed my working life and the intellectual stimulation it provided. Now I have 8+ more hours to fill each day and for the most part I spend them alone. Or with other drunk expats. But although I’m not often mentally challenged, I think I’m staying engaged on some level. The hours I spend hiking are also hours I spend thinking. Or listening to music. Sometimes both at the same time! Nothing boring about that.

Today’s hike. That bow-tie looking thing is where I was searching for that extra kilometer to add to my upcoming Hash trail. I’ve got a small addition on the back now. Perhaps I can add a bit more towards the front. I’ve still got a month to work it out.

***And in the meantime I’ll still make time to stop and smell the flowers.***

I’m a lucky bastard with too much time on his hands.

Sitting on this barstool talking like a damn fool
Got the twelve o’clock news blues
And I’ve given up hope for the afternoon soaps
And a bottle of cold brew
Is it any wonder I’m not crazy? Is it any wonder I’m sane at all
Well I’m so tired of losing- I got nothing to do and all day to do it
I go out cruisin’ but I’ve no place to go and all night to get there
Is it any wonder I’m not a criminal?
Is it any wonder I’m not in jail?
Is it any wonder I’ve got

Too much time on my hands?
It’s ticking away with my sanity
I’ve got too much time on my hands
It’s hard to believe such a calamity
I’ve got too much time on my hands
And it’s ticking away, ticking away from me
Too much time on my hands
(It’s t-t-t-t-ticking away)
Too much time on my hands
(And I don’t know what to do with myself)
Too much time on my hands

*when I wrote “however comfortably and well” it felt like something I had read somewhere, maybe in a Hemingway short story. I googled it and came up with nothing. If it’s plagiarism it’s unintentional…

On this day

Posted on 05/April/2019 by John McCrarey

Welp, it looks like I’ve been officially designated the Hare for the Hash on May 13. In preparation for that event I went out this morning to measure the trail I’ve been working on.

***This is the short version for us walkers. It incorporates most of “My Bitch”. Still would like to find a seamless way to add another kilometer or so.***

As it turns out May 13 is also election day here in the Philippines. That’s significant because Filipinos are not permitted to consume alcohol during elections. The bars here in Barretto are granted a waiver to serve foreigners only, but we have quite a few Filipinas in our kennel.
Since our beer is self-serve from ice chests it would be difficult to enforce a no-drinking edict. And that could pose a problem for our “on-home” venue should a Filipina be caught drinking. So one solution is to have the on-home activities done at, well, someone’s home. Heidi has a great house for it but we need to confirm she is willing. My house is Plan B. Stay tuned.

On this day four years ago I was meeting up with Kevin Kim and Young Chun to celebrate the publication of Young’s book The Accidental Citizen-Soldier (and to get my copy autographed of course).

And on this day six years ago promises were being made that were destined to be broken.

Speaking of Kevin Kim, on this day fourteen years ago I was discovering his blog Big Hominid’s Hairy Chasms. And posts like this one have kept me coming back for all these years. Those photos of hiking Namsan really make me homesick for Seoul.

Anyway, that’s the past and my future for better or worse is here in the Philippines. Forward march!

UPDATE: HaHa! This makes FIVE times I’ve used the “On this day” title. Perhaps it’s a sign I’ve been blogging too long. Nah, that can’t be it.

Anyway, on December 12, 2018 I recognized the 14th anniversary of the birth of LTG.

On June 22, 2018 I wrote about getting settled into my new (current) house here in Alta Vista.

On March 11, 2018 I blogged out some birthday love for my son Kevin.

And finally, the first time I used ” On this day” was back on January 25, 2015. I was talking about the excitement that comes with making up some burritos at home. And coincidentally, I was linked to a funny story from Kevin Kim’s blog about his encounter with the Korean National Police. Good stuff.

Dogging it

Posted on 04/April/2019 by John McCrarey

I’m amazed at how quickly Lucky’s skin condition has improved. He’s growing in a nice new fur coat and his itching and scratching are greatly diminished. I deemed his health good enough to finally relent and allow him to interact some with Buddy.

***Lucky is good on a leash and now participates in the 30 minute morning walk ritual with his step-brother Buddy.***

***And they like to roughhouse around. I do get a somewhat nervous because of the size differential. And Buddy tends to play a little rough…***

***But they seem to enjoy each other’s company so I’m glad about that.***

For me, it just nice to have some unconditional love in my life. A dog has never broken my heart before…

Give the devil his due

Posted on 03/April/2019 by John McCrarey

If there is one thing Uncle Sam excels at, it is collecting his debts. I was reminded of this fact when my daughter sent me a copy of a letter mailed to her address from the Department of the Treasury. It seems the powers that be in my homeland believe I owe them some money. That was shocking news to me since I made it a point to be debt free prior to commencing my second retirement from government service.

My initial reaction was the letter which threatens to withhold up to 25% of my pension check as of June 1st, was that this must be some kind of scam. For instance, the letter does not say to whom and how much I owe or why I’m suddenly indebted to something called “DMSOC-East” in Birmingham, Alabama. I wracked my brain throughout the day trying to figure out why I was being targeted. Of course my first thoughts were that it must be tax related, but I had sent the IRS a hefty $8000. dollar check last April paying my tax obligations in full. I also wondered why whatever the issue with my unknown delinquency may be, I had never been previously contacted to advise me of the mysterious debt. All the letter had to offer in answer to these questions was a 1-800 number I could call.

Well. The first thing I needed to do was to figure out just how in the fuck do I make a call to a toll-free number deep in the heart of Dixie? Once I had obtained some guidance in that regard I needed to wait until my night became working hours back in America the beautiful. On my second attempt (had to figure out how to do the +1 country code on my cell phone keypad) I got a recording with some options. I chose wrong apparently because the robot voice said they couldn’t help with that and immediately hung up. On my next try I was more diligent and chose the “other” option. Whereupon the voice said all agents were busy and would be busy for at least 10 minutes, but to hold the line or otherwise lose my place in the queue. Alrighty then.

In due course a human came on the line and the game was on! He needed to verify that I am who I say I am and after I satisfactorily answered a series of questions he asked me “how can I help you?” I responded please tell me what the heck is going on. Who do I owe and how much? I was advised that the debt was still with a private collection agency and I would have to call them for details. He was able to tell me that my indebtedness was to the Brian Allgood Army Hospital in Seoul, Korea.

Ah! Now I remembered. Just before departing Korea I had all of my prescriptions refilled. The normal process is that my insurance is billed and I’m on the hook for whatever amount is not covered. But for some reason I had never received an invoice for the unpaid balance. I had in fact been diligent about turning in a change of address to the Army Post Office but apparently nothing related to this bill ever got forwarded to my stateside address.

Well, at least I know now that the debt is legit. And I do take some pride in paying what I owe in life–unlike the socialists I’m not looking for a free ride. The agent on the phone was attempting to give me the contact info for the private collection agency and I told him not to bother. I’d prefer to just have the money deducted from the pension check in June. Much less hassle for me that way. The agent indicated there was no downside to my thinking in that regard so I thanked him for his time and we said our goodbyes.

And that constitutes the most excitement I’ve experienced in a good long while. And that is just about all the excitement I need or want. At least until April 15. Which reminds me, I’ve not heard back from my tax preparer. Damn it!

Popping a Cherry

Posted on 02/April/2019 by John McCrarey

Yes, you read that right. Last night I participated in deflowering a virgin. A Hash virgin that is. Go on, wipe that look of disappointment off your face!

Anyway, given that Leech My Nuggets was the Hare for yesterday’s trail I was pleasantly surprised that the walkers portion at least was not so bad. One major uphill but not too lengthy or overly vertical. And we were in the Calapdayan area where we don’t often Hash. So it was good to have some new views.

We’ll let the pictures (and captions) tell the story:

***The trail as seen from Google Earth…***

***There was a police checkpoint on National Highway and given the questionable legality of all of us riding in the back of the Hashmobile, we opted to walk out. Until we got past the cops anyway…***

***….and THEN us walkers loaded up for the ride out to Calapdayan.***

***Who’s that handsome guy at the back of the pack?***

***That’s Cherry (front) the Virgin Hasher with Salty Cum…***

***A view I liked enough to photograph…***

***…and on-home at Treasure Island for the customary end of trail liquid refreshment.***

That’s Heidi who completed her 5th run and thus was ripe for naming. I suggested Heidi Ho but alas the group voted for Revolving Whore. (She has a big house in Alta Vista and rents out rooms on Air BnB which I guess was the basis for the name she received.)

***Double Digits. Myself and Wonder Woman completed our 44th Hash and were honored by Helping Handjob and Salty Cum who have now completed 11 Hashes…***

***And that’s me completing the deflowering process (from behind) on a no longer virgin Hasher Cherry. She seemed to have a good time and claims she will be back next week. We’ll see.***

I mentioned Heidi is a neighbor here in Alta Vista. She’s a “rich” Filipina widow (her English husband died last year). I got a tour of her house a few weeks ago with the Wednesday Walkers and it truly is amazing. It features a beautiful rooftop bar and it is huge. In fact, we are considering using it for a future Hash event. Anyway, after the Hash several Hashers said Heidi had invited us all over for tequila shots. I wanted to confirm that myself, but Heidi was nowhere to be found. So against my better judgement we loaded into trikes and off we went. Upon arrival Heidi seemed surprised to see us and said she was heading out to take her kids to dinner. I hate when that happens!

Anyway, I invited the disappointed group down to my much less impressive place for some beer (hoping I did in fact have some in the fridge). They all agreed that was a good plan and we took off walking (it’s about 10 minutes or so). I did in fact have some beer chilled and served up some tortilla chips and salsa. And so the evening was saved!

***Going around the room is Bimbo (in the yellow shirt), Salty Cum, Pubic Face, Helping Handjob, Big Dick Lover and Cherry.***

Fun times!

What’s cookin’?

Posted on 01/April/2019 by John McCrarey

Dinner guests last night. On the menu: steak, baby back ribs, corn-on-the-cob, broccoli and garlic bread. Pro tip: Cook the meal before your start drinking. Well, actually I did the ribs in the crockpot so I started them in the morning. My timing was off is all. Some things were getting done (or overdone) in the wrong sequence. Anyway, being a little tipsy goes a long way to making everything taste better I suppose.

I broke down and bought some meat tenderizer. It did seem to help some. I got distracted and “flame broiled” the steaks which didn’t help much I suppose. Still medium on the inside, just a little *ahem* blackened.

***I had an attentive assistant. Lucky for me!***

I’m no foodie and honestly I’m not all that adventurous when it comes to local cuisine. I almost exclusively eat Western foods when I dine out and of course that’s all I cook at home. So when I came across this guide to Filipino street food I thought maybe it’s time to broaden my horizons:

***You really do need to*** ***go to the link*** ***and read the descriptions of each item to get the, um, full flavor of this cuisine.***

And in news from the world of science, this really explains a lot:

And now it is time for my weekly Hash adventure.

***Last week I had the Hashit. Perhaps today I’ll be able to avoid time on the ice.***

I got the Hashit, the Subic Hashit
For being stupid on trail today
I have to keep it until I pass it
Won’t someone take my Hashit away…

UPDATE: Well it turns out I used the “What’s Cookin’?” title back in April, 2013. I was cooking steaks that day too. Seems like a lifetime ago now. I guess in a way it was.

On my day

Posted on 01/April/2019 by John McCrarey

Turns out I was a fool to think I could take on the responsibility of two dogs. Oh well, lesson learned. I think the most humane thing to do is take Lucky way up in the hills and let him go. He’s a smart dog, I’m sure he’ll learn to fend for himself. I guess you weren’t so Lucky after all. Sorry!

I remember many years ago I was attending some labor relations training in Memphis, Tennessee. One evening in the hotel bar a couple of freelance prostitutes approached me and a buddy and offered their services. We declined and jokingly pointed across the room to where the instructor of our course was sitting and told them, “he’ll be interested!”.

The next day at the conclusion of the course the instructor called students up one by one for their certificate of completion. And then he said “Is there anyone I missed?” Me and my friend raised our hands. He looked at us and said “this is the first time I’ve ever had students fail my course” then tore up two certificates in front of the astounded group before dismissing the class. When everyone had departed except for us he came over and said those prostitutes wouldn’t leave him alone, even followed him into the hotel elevator. He then gave us our certificates, smiled and said “if you can’t take a joke, fuck you!”

That’s a true story. Unlike the first paragraph. Which you would have to be a fool to believe. Today of all days!

Long Time Gone

Monthly Archives: April 2019