Sucked in

Portrait of the blogger at work.

Portrait of the blogger at work.

It occurs to me that I ought to be posting something here at LTG.  The problem is every time I sit down to share the juicy details of my most interesting life here in the USA I have to face the sad fact that there aren’t any.  I’ve been working on a political post for a few days, but frankly I’m in so much despair about the state of our nation that I just can’t bring myself to finish it.  It’s not that I don’t care, it’s that I care too much.  Ah well.

My biggest fear when I retired and moved back to the states was that I would get sucked into the mundane and vanilla lifestyle that is so uniquely American.  I had hoped to counter that inevitability by spending significant parts of the year back in Korea.  Unfortunately, Uncle Sam has illogically tied my departure to coincide with with the issuance of my wife’s green card.  Last I heard from the government they advised it would likely be February before a decision was made.  And of course given the dysfunction of the bureaucracy that’s probably optimistic.

Which is not to say that I haven’t been making the best of things during my sojourn in the United States.  I’ve been working hard at building a vibrant darting community here in my hometown of Columbia.  I’ve got things to the point where I can now play four times a week (versus the previous one) without leaving the Midlands.  That was pretty much my darting schedule in Korea, so I reckon I’m generally satisfied.  And I guess I’ve made some new friends and acquaintances along the way, so I’m happy about that.

But I’m missing my Korea life quite a lot and can’t help but feeling sometimes like the world is passing me by while I’m stuck here in South Carolina.  To be sure, there are worse places to be stuck. It’s just not in my nature to be happy about being stuck anywhere I suppose.

There you have it.  A post about nothing noteworthy.  Which certainly is in keeping with the fine tradition I’ve established here at LTG.

 

 

 

Screw jihad!

Where have all the comfort girls gone?                                                                            Long time passing                                                                                                            Where have the comfort girls gone?                                                                                 Long time ago                                                                                                                 Where have all the comfort girls gone?                                                                           Gone to Syria everyone                                                                                                   When will they ever learn?                                                                                                      When will they ever learn?

with apologies to Pete Seeger

I suppose it’s an inapt comparison to the Korean comfort women of WWII since there is no indication these Tunisian lasses are being forced to fuck the Syrian terrorists rebels freedom fighters.  The folks back home are none to pleased that their women folk are returning preggers.  But as they say, terrorist babies don’t grow on trees.

What I find interesting is that apparently in Islam everything goes–murder, torture, sexual intercourse–provided you announce that you are doing it for the purpose of jihad.  Hey, it worked for the Prophet!

http://youtu.be/IvC9sbK725M

More or less

Second place finish in the blind draw tourney last night.

Second place finish in the blind draw tourney last night.

I threw some brilliant darts yesterday.  But more often they were mediocre.  Finished with 6 wins and 9 losses in the cricket qualifier, which means I won’t be getting a paid trip to Las Vegas.

Did manage to make it to the Championship round in the blind draw tourney last night.  A hard fought battle, but alas, we had to settle for second place money.  Which is of course much better than getting poked in the eye with a dart.

More on tap today and tomorrow.  Back to work!

 

A shootout in Charleston

Bright and early in the morning I’ll be making way to Charleston, SC to participate in the Bob Dailey Open darts tournament.  Starting things off with the Cricket Regional then I’ll play all the usual events during the course of the weekend.

I feel like my game has improved these past couple of months.  Has it improved enough to actually be competitive?  Time will tell.  But I’m gonna shoot ’em up as best as I am able.

 

Remembering when everything changed

nineeleven

Forgetfulness occurs when those who have been long inured to civilized order can no longer remember a time in which they had to wonder whether their crops would grow to maturity without being stolen or their children sold into slavery by a victorious foe.

They forget that in time of danger, in the face of the Enemy, they must trust and confide in each other, or perish.

They forget, in short, that there has ever been a category of human experience called the Enemy. And that, before 9/11, was what had happened to us. The very concept of the Enemy had been banished from our moral and political vocabulary. An enemy was just a friend we hadn’t done enough for — yet. Or perhaps there had been a misunderstanding, or an oversight on our part — something that we could correct. And this means that that our first task is that we must try to grasp what the concept of the Enemy really means.

 

The Enemy is someone who is willing to die in order to kill you. And while it is true that the Enemy always hates us for a reason — it is his reason, and not ours.

–Lee Harris

Nothing ventured, nothing lost

All I lost last week was some dart games.  My own damn fault really.  Too much time on the couch, not enough on the treadmill.  Got a little too cocky after breaking the 50 pound barrier I suppose.  That and my inability to resist Jee Yeun’s tasty smoothies.

One pound gain, puts me back at 228.5.  This week I am rededicating myself to being dedicated.

Onward and downward!

Puking with the stars

The Big Hominid recounts a recent brush with fame, which set me to thinking about the only celebrity encounter I experienced, at least that I can recall.

It was sometime in 1979 or so, back when I was residing in the lovely city of Prescott, Arizona.  My wife from that era was working at a local dining establishment and I came in and sat at the bar while I waited for her shift to end.  I hadn’t really noticed the gentleman sitting on the bar stool next to me until some female patrons approached and asked him for an autograph.  After he obliged I guess he noticed me looking at him trying to figure out who in the fuck he was.  He smiled, offered his hand, and introduced himself as “Jan”.  To be honest, the name didn’t ring a bell but the face was somewhat familiar.

Anyway, we began to chat.  He was in town attending some sessions at a nearby gun school.  I don’t recall if he said this was preparation for a movie role or if he just liked guns. As we talked periodically someone would recognize him and come up to meet him.  He was always gracious, but I could tell he found it somewhat irksome.  About this time my wife appeared and judging by her giddiness I guess she recognized him too.  As we were preparing to leave I asked if he’d like to join us.  I was mostly just being polite so I was a little taken aback when he said “I sure would!”  I don’t recall now where we intended to actually go, but it was likely one of the dives we liked on Whiskey Row.

As it turns out we didn’t make it far.  Once we got into my vehicle (an older but rugged Toyota LandCruiser), Jan asked if we’d like to smoke a joint before we left.  I was a big pot smoker back in those days so naturally I answered in the affirmative.  Damn, it was some good shit.  In fact, it may have been laced with something, because I got real wasted real quick.  And then he pulled out a tin of cocaine!  I did a snort or two of that and the next thing I remember I was leaning out the car door puking my guts out.

I’m pretty sure Jan found my lightweight antics equally disturbing and disgusting.  Suffice to say he changed his mind about joining us, quickly said his goodbyes and left.

And so ended my chance encounter with the B-list celebrity Jan Michael Vincent.

jmv

Thanks for reminding me of that night Kevin Kim!

Saving the world one city at a time

The collapse of Detroit has of course been much in the news of late.  Detropia does a nice job of documenting the decline of this once great city.  A quick Google search reveals hundreds of articles and opinion pieces from all  points on the political spectrum pontificating about the root causes of Detroit’s death spiral and its implications (or lack thereof) for the rest of America.  Paul Krugman (bless his Nobel Laureate heart) weighed in blaming the fall of Detroit on urban sprawl (shhh, nobody tell Los Angeles!).  All of which of course ignores the elephant that truly devoured Detroit: political corruption, union cronyism, and irresponsible short-sightedness of greedy corporate executives.  Or take your pick. See, there’s plenty of blame to go around.

But really, as Hillary Clinton might say, what does it matter now?  Our focus should turn to how we fix the mess that was once one of America’s richest cities.  Now, the mayor of Boston had a pretty good plan–blow it up and start all over again.  Assuming that course of action may be a bit extreme for my gentle readers, let’s look for something else.  A Facebook friend posted this story on why Toronto is succeeding while the rest of the rust belt is, well, rusting.  The solution proposed is to bring in a bunch of immigrants and repopulate the city.  Which is a fine plan I suppose except for the parts about there being no jobs and the city can’t be expected to provide much in the way of social services when it can’t even keep the streetlights burning.  Lord knows though, there is plenty of available housing.  Unfortunately, Detroit can’t even give houses away these days because no one can afford the outrageous property taxes.  So, adding more jobless people (even if they are not homeless) won’t fix Detroit’s problems.

We need a radical solution here and after stewing on the problems for awhile I came up with a plan.  Let me present to you The Free City of Detroit.  My idea is sort of built around the concept of Free Trade Zones, but with much, much more to entice people, and just as importantly, businesses and manufacturing back into this forlorn and nearly abandoned city.

Here’s how it works.  Residents of Detroit will still have to pay federal and state income taxes (I just don’t see a Constitutionally viable way around that).  However, under the Charter of the Free City of Detroit all those taxes will be refunded to the city.  With that money the city will be able to provide necessary services and infrastructure making the city a much more pleasant environment in which to live.  But more importantly, the city would not be permitted to impose any additional taxes on people or businesses.  No sales tax, no property tax, no business licensing fees, no corporate taxes.  It’s a Free City after all.  Any federal or state tax dollars not spent by the city would be returned to the people–not unlike what Alaska does with it’s oil revenues.  Think about it–you could actually be paid to live in Detroit!  It would also be a good way to keep the politicians in check (more on that later)–the people would not stand idly by when money is wastefully spent that would otherwise be in their wallets.  The beauty is that the more people who move back to Detroit (along with  the businesses that support and employ them) the richer the city becomes.

But wait there’s more!  In a Free City the only laws that would be enforced are those reasonable and necessary to protect property and the people from violence.  Gambling, prostitution, drugs–all legal in the Free City of Detroit!  No longer will residents be victims of victimless crimes.  Just making drugs legally available would go a long way to reducing violent crime.  Here’s some science to back up that claim.  Who wouldn’t want to live in a libertarian paradise like the Free City of Detroit?

Alright, let me answer the questions the preceding paragraph may have sent careening through your brain.  Most federal laws and regulations would still apply, unless specifically exempted by Congress.  I’m not looking to have workers unprotected, so OSHA standards would remain in place.  And any racists out there should not rejoice, the equal protection clause of the Constitution (and all other Amendments) would guard the rights of all citizens.  Feel a little better now?

But what about jobs?   Detroit didn’t lose it’s historic manufacturing base because of some inescapable natural phenomenon.  Rather they were driven away by an unholy trinity of high taxes, unsupportable wages and benefits, and corporate greed.  Well, I’ve already addressed the tax issue.  Michigan has adopted right-to-work laws which should keep jobs protected from unscrupulous union demands.  And hell, corporate greed is what will bring the jobs back!  Automobile manufacturers are building cars for a profit in Tennessee and Alabama.  If you make it cheaper to build them in the Free City of Detroit, they’ll come rushing back to do so.

Finally, the toughest nut to crack might be political corruption.  Lord knows that played a significant role in the demise of old Detroit.  So, I propose a five member board of governors to rule the city.  And given that I have a certain fondness for democratic principles, the Chair of that board would be elected.  The other four would be appointed to represent the various constituencies with an interest in the health and welfare of the city: one from the State, one from the Feds, one for corporate interests, and one for small business owners.  They would be required to manage the city in strict accordance with the terms of the Charter, and no funds could be dispersed for any purpose other than for the overall interest of the city at large as determined by a majority of the Board of Governors.  As a safeguard, the Board would also be limited to 3 year terms with no reappointment or reelection.  Not perfect, but what is in this world?

So there you have it.  A viable plan to save the city of Detroit by destroying it (without bombs of course!).  And from the ashes of failure a new and free Detroit will arise, built on the principles of freedom, justice, and good old fashioned American ingenuity.  Have you heard any better options?

Yes we can!  Do we have the courage and foresight to try another way?

Yes we can! Do we have the courage and foresight to try another way?

And the walls come tumbling down

 

Try strapping this on and carrying it around for oh say, years.

Try strapping this on and carrying it around for oh, say years.

Blasted into the 220s this week and also broke through the 50 pound barrier.  Week 29 of the LCHF lifestyle saw me drop 5 pounds to 227.5.  If you are keeping score at home that makes 51 pounds lost overall.  Also managed to lose an inch of that stubborn girth to bring my middle to 43″, an 8 1/2 inch reduction overall.

My 3XL shirts fit me like tents now.  On the other hand, some 2XLs that have been hanging unworn in the closet for a couple of years actually look good on me again.  I’m now wearing 38″ waist jeans (with a belt!).  And of course it feels great to not struggle so much with daily tasks like putting on my socks or picking up dropped darts.  Not to mention that laying down that 50 pound bag of rice just makes me feel better in general (no more pregnant woman style backaches!).

So, 12 pounds left to go to reach my target weight.  Then I can go into “maintenance mode”.  Meaning I might occasionally be able to enjoy some of the foods I’ve been missing the most.  Like a big fat baked potato to go with my steak.  And some ice cream for dessert!

Onward and downward!

"Are you sure the baby is mine"?   No, it's just a big ol' bag of rice.

“Are you sure the baby is mine”?
No, it’s just a big ol’ bag of rice.

UPDATE:  More good news.  Just did my BMI calculation and I’ve gone from being obese to just good ol’ fashioned overweight.

There’s a new kid on the block

If you check my blogroll you’ll find a new addition–the Columbia Area Darts Association webpage.

Admittedly it’s not much to look at.  But cut me a little slack, I’ve never attempted to build a website before.  Sure, I used a template but it was still a struggle to get it as right as I did.  A full day’s work to boot!

Anyway, we now how a repository for Columbia-centric darts information.  More importantly, folks who might be looking for darts here in the Midlands of South Carolina now have a way to find us.

We’re getting there.  One step at a time.

Standings

This is a test to see if I’ve managed to figure out how to post documents from Word and Excel on a WordPress blog.

CSL standings

CSLstandings

Hmm, I was hoping to actually display those pages as opposed to creating hyperlinks.  Now, the only way I’ve been able view them is to right click and open them in a new window.  At least it works that way on my computer, but then, I have the documents saved to my hard drive.

Will some lucky reader try the links above and advise if they can access the documents?  Thanks in advance.

UPDATE:  Interesting.  Once I actually published the post, those hyperlinks turned into sweet little document-like looking things.  Again, they work when I click them, do they work for you?

I’ve installed another WordPress plugin, let’s see how (if) it works.

Leader Board

SIDL_TShirt_3

 

On this day in history

me

Ah, another birthday.  No great insights or wisdom to impart upon turning 58.  Although it can truthfully be said that I am less of a man than I used to be.

I’d say the worst thing about getting older is an acute awareness of the inescapable reality that the number of remaining birthdays is growing smaller.  Of course, that’s always been the case.  But now I recognize that my best case scenario is probably twenty or so more to go.  If I’m lucky.  Nevertheless, having a birthday sure as hell beats the alternative and by the time I finish this post I will have banished thoughts of mortality from my feeble brain.

On tap: Jee Yeun is taking me to her favorite place for breakfast–Waffle House.  And of course later I’ll be eating the traditional seaweed soup.  Tonight I’ll be heading downtown to scope out some darts venues and throw a few games.  I’d call that a good day!

What’s a birthday without a birthday song?  Here’s mine courtesy of Bob Dylan:

Crimson flames tied through my ears
Rollin’ high and mighty traps
Pounced with fire on flaming roads
Using ideas as my maps
“We’ll meet on edges, soon,” said I
Proud ‘neath heated brow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Half-wracked prejudice leaped forth
“Rip down all hate,” I screamed
Lies that life is black and white
Spoke from my skull. I dreamed
Romantic facts of musketeers
Foundationed deep, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Girls’ faces formed the forward path
From phony jealousy
To memorizing politics
Of ancient history
Flung down by corpse evangelists
Unthought of, though, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

A self-ordained professor’s tongue
Too serious to fool
Spouted out that liberty
Is just equality in school
“Equality,” I spoke the word
As if a wedding vow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

In a soldier’s stance, I aimed my hand
At the mongrel dogs who teach [no offense to Kevin Kim intended]
Fearing not that I’d become my enemy
In the instant that I preach
My pathway led by confusion boats
Mutiny from stern to bow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

Yes, my guard stood hard when abstract threats
Too noble to neglect
Deceived me into thinking
I had something to protect
Good and bad, I define these terms
Quite clear, no doubt, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

http://youtu.be/XMea-eGmd8c

What goes around comes around

First place gets the money, second place gets a "nice try".  I like this photo because it's a little ambiguous about which is which...

First place gets the money, second place gets a “nice try”. I like this photo because it’s a little ambiguous about which is which…

The Columbia Area Darts Association (CADA) hosted it’s first ever qualifying event yesterday.  We had six players vying for paid entry ($110!) to the ADO Regional Cricket Qualifier next month in Charleston, SC.  It was a round robin format, with each player playing the other players 3 legs of Cricket.  Winner of the most legs on the day takes home the prize money.

I had a good day of darts, going 2-1, 3-0, 2-1, 2-1 and 1-2.  Well, the 1-2 at the end stung a little, but it was one of those situations where I threw well but my opponent threw better.  Nothing to be done about that.  Anyway, I’m the one in the photo above giving the money away.

After the darts were done, a group of us went out to try Columbia’s newest Korean restaurant–The Korea Garden.

Jee Yeun is the expert and she declared the food at Korean Garden to be excellent.  I  enjoyed the galbi and "ding dong" jiggae very much as well...

Jee Yeun is the expert and she declared the food at Korea Garden to be excellent. I enjoyed the galbi and “ding dong” jiggae very much as well…

And finally, this morning’s weigh-in finds me at 232.5, down 2.5 pounds from last week.  It is good to be going in the right direction again.  Girth remains stubbornly unchanged at 44″.  If you are keeping score at home, I’ve lost 46 pounds since February.

Onward and downward!

Leggo my logo!

Fans of LTG will recall that I’ve been working hard to bring the sport of darts back to Columbia in a big way.  Well, truth be told even a small revitalization will be a helluva lot more than we have.  With either of those ends in minds, we recently founded the Columbia Area Darts Association, or as the lazy amongst us affectionately call it, CADA.

Knowing that taking care of the important details is the first step on the road to success, I undertook the effort of having a logo designed.  Lacking any relevant and necessary skills to complete such a project, I did the next best thing:  I asked for bids at a website called DesignQuote.net.

Most of the bids were ridiculously expensive, but two came back with quotes that were comparatively reasonable.  Unable to decide who to pick, I set them both to work.  A little design competition if you will. Now, I already had a concept in mind.  Back in those heady days of the 1980s when darts actually existed in Columbia the organization used this:

Old school graphic design.  Ugly, but functional I suppose

Old school graphic design. Ugly, but functional I suppose

I actually think it’s pretty damn awful.  Still, Columbia is a fine city and all, but when it comes to recognizable landmarks, it’s tough to beat the State House.  I just needed to pretty it up some. Here’s what I sent my designers as a starting point:

Hey, don't laugh!  I told you I had absolutely zero talent as an artist...

Hey, don’t laugh! I told you I had absolutely zero talent as an artist…

What the State House actually looks like:

Right smack dab in the middle of Downtown Columbia

Right smack dab in the middle of Downtown Columbia

So, the first designer offered me this:

Well, I guess you could say it is what I asked for, but it really wasn't what I wanted.  Know what I mean?

Well, I guess you could say it is what I asked for, but it really wasn’t what I wanted. Know what I mean?

With the State House in silhouette, it could be any damn building.  It was just not the “distinctively Columbia” look I was going for.

So, designer number 2 came up with this rendition:

Ah, my vision becomes reality at last!

Ah, my vision becomes reality at last!

Alright, that’s more like it, don’t you think?  Not perfect, but as we used to say in the Federal government, “it satisfices”.

Hey, speaking of logos, did I mention that CADA is now officially a member of the American Darts Organization (ADO).  Well, we are.  That’s the big time, baby!

We've only just begun, but we are on our way!

We’ve only just begun, but we are on our way!

 

What passes for excitement in my neighborhood

Pat, the elderly widow next door, called me yesterday morning.  She’s been spending the summer with her kids in Cape Cod.  Anyway, she reported that a woman down the street had observed a U-Haul truck in her driveway.  She told me that she had no idea who had parked it there and asked if I would investigate.  I had to admit it sounded pretty suspicious.

This is one of those times I wish I had a handgun readily available.  I briefly considered taking my single shot .22 caliber rifle out of the closet, but figured that was likely to cause me more trouble than it would help should a gun battle break out.  So, I walked over and peaked in the windows of the house, but saw nothing unusual taking place.  I checked the back gate and it was also secure.  Then I did a walk around the truck and observed the back door was padlocked.  I looked in the driver’s side window and saw a stack of mail on the passenger seat.  I moved over to the passenger side for a closer look and sure enough the mail was addressed to my neighbor.  It seemed like an awful big truck for a mail heist.

I went back inside my house, retrieved my phone , and called Pat to report my findings.  She asked that I keep an eye out and call the police if I spotted anyone.  With her still on the phone I walked back outside just as a car was pulling up in front of her house.  A young man got out of the passenger seat and I asked him what was up.  He told me he was Pat’s grandson and he had rented the truck to move some patio furniture.  I put him on the phone with Pat and heard him say “hi Nana, I’m picking up the patio stuff.”  They talked a couple of more minutes and he gave me back my phone.  Satisfied that nothing untoward was taking place I left him to his business.

In other news, the scale was not kind to me this week.  While disappointed, I’m not particularly surprised.  I had company during the week which put me off my exercise routine, and I did drink a couple of smoothies.  Net result was a one pound gain which puts me back to 235.  I do believe these next 20 pounds are going to be a bitch.  My body seems to think my current weight is most excellent and it reminded me that I am after all back in my 38″ waist jeans.  I responded “fuck that, we are going DOWN!”

Onward and downward!

A day in the life

Oh boy.  It’s a sedate, if not serene, lifestyle I’m living in retirement.  At least as far as the USA iteration goes.  Hold on to your hats, here’s how my Friday went down.

The day started with me going to bed at 1:00 a.m.  Sometime during the night a heavy rain began to fall and continued throughout the day.  I was awakened around 6:30 by a persistent chirping.  I looked at the bedside clock and it was dark, so I realized the power had gone out at some point.  I couldn’t get back to sleep because of the chirps emitting from somewhere in the house every minute or so.  After 15 minutes the cobwebs in my brain had cleared out enough for me to grasp that the incessant noise was coming from my security system.  When the power goes out it chirps out its warning for as long as the back-up battery lasts.  Duh.  Rolled out of bed and reset the alarm, and then returned to my peaceful slumber.

I re-awoke at 9:00 and turned on the coffer maker/grinder.  Damn thing sounds like a jet taking off.  Fortunately our house guest Corine, who is visiting from Maryland, was already up and preparing for her long drive home.  My only real complaint about my ATT Uverse internet service is that every time there is a power interruption my personal wireless network disappears.  And sure enough, it was gone again.  My efforts to restore it were fruitless so I called the tech support folks.  And spent an hour and fifteen minutes on the phone trying to get the network back up.  We eventually managed to get my computer back on line, but the other devices (Jee Yeun’s laptop, Corine’s Ipad, and my Roku) would not connect.  I had an appointment to get to, so the tech promised to call me back at 1:00.  He didn’t.

I needed to get Jee Yeun to her physical therapy appointment, so we said our goodbyes to Corine and headed up the highway in the pouring rain.  I snoozed in the car while Jee Yeun had her shoulder worked on.  On the way home we stopped at Walgreen’s for a carton of smokes.

Back at the house, we did a reboot of Jee Yeun’s computer and this time it connected to our wireless network.  Hooray!  I had a chef salad for lunch and did a little internet surfing.  I put out some feelers for a graphic designer to come up with an appropriate logo for the newly formed Columbia Area Darts Association.  The bids are coming in at around $250.  Since I’m paying for this work out of pocket I’m hoping to get someone for closer to $150.  I mean, I have the vision, I just need someone with the skills to implement it.  We’ll see.

One of my favorite retirement perks is the ability to take a nap anytime the mood strikes me.  It did, so I did.  I woke up refreshed an hour later and knocked out a few games of Words with Friends.  My brother in California is the only person who still wants to play me these days .  I do fairly well at the game I suppose (it’s like Scrabble, only easier), but my bro still beats me the majority of the time.  Guess that’s why he still plays me.

Jee Yeun offered to make me a smoothie and I didn’t refuse.  Not especially in keeping with my low carbohydrate regimen, but I had it in lieu of dinner.  Besides, man does not live by not eating bread alone.  To coin a phrase.

Next up was a brisk walk for an hour (3.5 miles) on the treadmill..  Then an hour and half of darts practice.  Another round of Words with Friends, some television (Orange is the New Black) on Netflix, a shower, and this blog post.

And there you have it.  Hey you, wake up!  This is my life we’re talking about here!