Dungeons and Dragons

The dungeon otherwise known as Friends Bar...

The dungeon otherwise known as Friends Bar…

I reckon it’s time to once again accommodate Thirsty’s request for regular dart league updates.  Last night my team (The Dillinger’s Dartitis Quarintine) played the boys from Friends Bar.  This bar is not my favorite venue by a long shot.  I wrote a review of the joint way back in 2009 and suffice to say things have not improved.  It’s dirty, dark, and dank.  And they don’t serve draft beer.  So I settled for large bottles of OB at W5000 a pop.  To be fair though, the boards were in excellent condition and the lighting of said boards was also better than I remember.  And the bartender was friendly, efficient, and well-decorated.

The "dragon" in the dungeon.  Don't recall her name, but she is the sister of the waitress at Dillinger's.  I'm not much for tattoos, but I'll admit her ink was excellent.

The “dragon” in the dungeon. Don’t recall her name, but she is the sister of the waitress at Dillinger’s. I’m not much for tattoos, but I’ll admit her ink was excellent.

Our team suffered another ass-kicking, which makes us 0-3 on the season.  I’m playing in the “A” division, but I am not throwing “A” division darts.  I went 0-3 in singles, 2-1 and 1-2 in doubles.  I just can’t seem to hang with the big boys these days, which is frustrating.  Ah well, nothing to do but keep throwing and hope for better results.

On Sunday I attended a surprise birthday party for my buddy Matt (and potential future boss) at Shenanigans.  It actually was a surprise for me because I showed up by chance without an invite.  I felt a little weird about that, but the next day I noticed that I had been sent a message asking me to come.  Anyway, we did an impromptu tourney and I drew Matt as my partner.  We managed a second place finish, but had I thrown even marginally better we could (and should) have won the damn thing.  I couldn’t help but feel I let the birthday boy down.  Ah well.

The party turned out to be quite a bit of fun...

The party turned out to be quite a bit of fun…

Friday night at Dolce Vita I fared a little better, taking a first place with my partner YS.

My eyes were as fuzzy as this photo, so sadly I don't recall many details from the match...

My eyes were as fuzzy as this photo, so sadly I don’t recall many details from the match…

And other than that I guess all I can report is that I’ve been feeling a little moody lately.  In fact, this pretty much sums up my state of mind:

fourmoods

Just gonna roll with the flow for now and see what tomorrow brings.

The Y of the V

A sign of the times

A sign of the times

According to Time magazine, the ubiquitous “V” sign that Asians universally flash whenever they are photographed is all about a fallen American figure skater.

I remain unconvinced.  Plus, I’m doing it wrong.

UPDATE: Commenter Kevin notes that my “V” style is more apropos to the traditional British fuck you.

Fook you, ya damn Yankee wanker...

Fook you, ya damn Yankee wanker…

The origins of which are well known:

Winston Churchill famously telling Hitler to fuck off...

Winston Churchill famously telling Hitler to fuck off…

 

Regarding religion

So, I’ve found myself thinking about religion of late.  Not in terms of getting me some, just in general.  Which is to say I’m not exactly sure where these thoughts are taking me, but bear with me and we’ll muddle through together, okay?

Now, I was pretty much raised in the protestant tradition, at least to the extent that my grandmother dutifully took us to Sunday school every week.  I even played steel guitar in a little church band that toured the western states when I was 12.  At around 15 or 16 though I entered my rebellious phase and pretty much came to the conclusion that organized religion was all bullshit.  I certainly want no part of the Old Testament vengeful and jealous God, nor do I believe the stories of the virgin birth and resurrection.  Which I guess means that I ain’t much of a Christian.

Having said that, I do try very hard to be respectful of the religious beliefs of others.  I have a couple of Facebook “friends” (meaning people I’ve never actually met in real life) who constantly mock people of faith (usually Christians since they don’t have the balls to publicly criticize Muslims).  They are as strident in their atheist beliefs as any other religious zealot I have encountered.  In fact, I find their rants every bit as irritating as a knock on the door from a Jehovah’s Witness.

My second ex-wife was a Baptist (the other two ex’s were Catholic and the current wife is Buddhist) and I didn’t object to her taking my young children to church every Sunday.  For awhile I attended with them, but damn, I rarely left church feeling uplifted.  The sermons tended to piss me off as much as anything.  The final straw for me was the Sunday school session where we talked about “free will”.  Which was immediately followed by an entreaty to join in a planned march on the state house in favor of anti-abortion legislation.  I asked the Sunday school teacher how it could be that God gave mankind free will, but the Baptist church wanted to pass laws restricting choice?  I got the old standard reply that it was “a matter of faith”.  Whatever the hell that means.   The epilog to that incident came when the leader of the anti-abortion contingent got pregnant and was told the fetus did not a brain stem.  Yep, she aborted.

So, if I have a problem with religion it’s with the hypocrisy of the adherents.  The stuff people do in the name of God makes me want no part of the God they profess to believe in.  Oddly enough though, I don’t think of myself as an atheist.  I can accept the concept of some intelligence or power manifested in nature and the universe.  It’s just not the God you read about in earthly religious texts.  The closest I ever felt to this “God” was the night I had an epiphany after making love to my Mormon girlfriend.  “God is love” is what I felt in that blessed moment of understanding.  The very next day this woman whom I loved like I’ve loved no other broke up with me.  Which proves I guess that my God has a whacky sense of humor.  Still, I will confess that in times of crisis throughout my life I have found some comfort in prayer.  If that makes me a hypocrite too, so be it.

What prompted me to write about religion now I guess is current events.  Jews killing Palestinians in retaliation of Palestinians killing Jews.  Muslims killing Christians and everyone else who doesn’t adhere to the dogma of that particular sect.  All in the name of the same God of course.  But that is where any moral equivalence ends.  Israel has the right to defend herself.  If Hamas doesn’t like civilian casualties, they should stop trying to kill Israeli civilians.  And what ISIS is currently doing in Iraq (and the Taliban in Afghanistan) is an affront to all humanity.  So, when my liberal friends lament the “war on women” as evidenced by Hobby Lobby not wanting to pay for birth control on religious grounds, I share this photo:

“We have established the brigade to raise awareness of our religion among women, and to punish women who do not abide by the law” --ISIS commander

“We have established the brigade to raise awareness of our religion among women, and to punish women who do not abide by the law” –ISIS commander

Now, I want to accept as fact that of the billion or so Muslims in the world, only a relatively small percentage are of the radical Islamist variety that engages in head chopping, stoning, honor killing, and flying passenger planes into buildings.  But here’s the thing–I never see protests or outrage from these “moderates” regarding the atrocities being done in the name of Allah.  In fact, what I have witnessed is quite the opposite.

I have a couple of Pakistani Muslim friends in Itaewon.  Both are smart, kind, and generous.  They own a bar I regularly frequent. Both drink, smoke, and have married outside the faith.  I guess it doesn’t get any more moderate than that, right?  Except they have gone ballistic (no pun intended) over the current conflict in Gaza.  I finally had to block one of them on Facebook because I grew weary of the anti-Israel and anti-American (like it’s our fault!) rants.  I could match ten photos of some outrageous act being perpetuated in Pakistan for every Israeli impropriety.  And at least Israel is acting in self-defense, not out of some misguided belief in religious justification (what, she was raped?  We must stone her for being a whore!).

Anyway, I posted the picture above on my Facebook in the context of American politics (the so-called war on women).  And my Muslim friend responded that it was “anti-Muslim propaganda”.  One of the commenters asked if he was denying the existence of the Islamic State of Iraq (ISIS) and the murderous acts in which they are currently engaged.  He responded:

yes ISIS exist and they have broken Syria and Iraq in to parts. They are trying to create a divide in Sunni’s and Shiites. Rumor has it that the leader of ISIS Abu Bakr Baghdadi was trained by CIA and mosad to create chaos in middle east so that the idea of greater Israel can be achieved. I came across a world map issued by the US think tanks in which they have shown 5 middle eastern countries dividing into 15 smaller countries. If u Google it you can find it and then you search for greater Israel map and you will know a secret.

So much for moderate Islam, eh?  Suffice to say, I no longer feel comfortable patronizing their bar these days.  I have taken an oath to avoid drama in Itaewon and I fear that drinking there may lead me to say some things that will lead to dramatic consequences.  And to what end?  Clearly, no minds will be changed.

Of course, America’s feckless foreign policy has played a part in what is taking place in the Middle East.  Can’t blame God for that, although I can and do blame Obama.

Jews

Sorry for the rant.  I’m just thinking things are gonna get a whole lot worse before they get any better.

God help us all.

 

An ugly night

In dart league last night we played Dillinger’s Dill Pickles, the top rated team in Itaewon.  The results were as one might expect, but to get beat and throw badly was not a pleasant experience for yours truly..

After the match two people I like very much got into a verbal altercation.  It appeared to me to be a simple misunderstanding, but one of the two was drunk and he tends to be a mean drunk.  I tried to calm him dawn to no effect and keeping with my “no drama” policy I got up and went to pay my tab.  When I returned things had escalated to the physical and tables were being knocked over and beer glasses were flying.  Soon enough some folks stepped in and managed to separate the combatants, but it was a very ugly scene.  I left at that point not wanting to deal with the aftermath.

Fights are relatively rare in dart league, but I found the whole experience disconcerting, disappointing, and depressing.  A sorry shame it was.

 

No Mo!

And no more Tony either...

And no more Tony either…

Another weekend, another farewell party.  This time it was Tony and Mo saying their goodbyes to Korea as the Army has deemed they are needed in San Antonio.  When I returned to Korea after a 13 month hiatus, most of the old faces were gone.  Tony and Mo were amongst the new faces I met and enjoyed spending time with, if only for a little while.  Such is the life in Itaewon I suppose.  I will say they put out a nice spread of food and free beer for their friends and we all had a good time.  I wish them both best of luck in the future.

As in the tradition at these farewell parties, a darts tournament broke out.  Traditionally, the guests of honor do not win said tournament.  Last night I drew up Mo as my partner, and Tony was paired with Dolce Vita proprietor Jim.  And sure enough the four of us met in the finals, guaranteeing that at least one of them would break the tourney jinx and go out on a high note.  After a long and drunken match in which none of us could hit the outs for which we aimed, I snuck  in a double 1 for the win.  Tony was philosophical about it, saying if I win Mo gets the money, if she wins she gets the money.  So I guess it all went according to plan.

After the party I wasn’t quite ready for the subway journey home so I headed up Hooker Hill to a country bar I used to favor, The Grand Ole Opry.  It’s been years since I was in there, but the ajumma who runs the joint remembered me as did the waitress, so that made me feel pretty good.

The guy in the cowboy hat was doing the Texas two-step and making the girls smile.  There was a time when I fancied myself a pretty fair country dancer, but alas I was without a partner last night.

The guy in the cowboy hat was doing the Texas two-step and making the girls smile. There was a time when I fancied myself a pretty fair country dancer, but alas I was without a partner last night.

And since I promised Thirsty more posts about darts I’ll briefly mention Friday night’s action at Dolce.  I teamed up with Shane and we both struggled all night, but somehow managed to make it through the winner’s bracket undefeated.  We met Wan Jun and Steve in the finals and they dispatched us pretty quickly in the first set.  We were down and almost out in the final leg of the match–behind on points and 17s wide open.  We had bulls closed, and they needed one more bull for the win.  And then I managed a double bull on my first dart which put us up on points, hit a double 17 with my second dart, and then a single 17 for the win.  Yeah, I was lucky, but it was still a sweet finish.

We both went home W20,000 richer...

We both went home W20,000 richer…

Thirsty?

I’ll drink to that!

neil

Last night I had the pleasure of running into a long time LTG reader and old friend Neil Hirst (aka Thirsty) at Dolce Vita.  I’ve been knowing Thirsty since we met at a dart match in December 2006 when he impressed me by recounting his favorite posts from the blog, including the time I busted open my skull and witnessed what turned out to be a friend of Neil’s falling out of a cab. And over the years he’s continued to read the blog and occasionally even comment!  You can’t buy that kind of loyalty, but you can reward it with a beer.  So I did.

Neil left Korea a few years back for Jakarta but we stayed connected via LTG. He then spent some time in China where he acquired a beautiful Chinese wife who subsequently provided him with a handsome son.  Thirsty proudly reports the boy can cuss in three languages!  These days he calls Singapore home, but a recent promotion will afford him the opportunity to visit Korea several times a year.  So, I’ll be looking forward to our next chance encounter.

Speaking of which, there was a fair amount of kismet involved in my running into Thirsty last night.  I wasn’t even supposed to be at Dolce Vita as I have a standing Wednesday night dart date at Bull and Barrel with my Canadian friend Craig Cowper.  Craig had to cancel last night, so I made my way over to Shenanigans where I enjoyed some beer and conversation with a university professor who hails from Alabama.  He wanted me to stay and throw some darts with him, but alas, I had left my darts at Dolce Monday night.  So, I went to retrieve them and ran into a friend whose son was visiting from Russia and she asked if I’d give him a game or two.  Which I did.  He’s a fine lad and his game is improving, but let’s just say his missiles weren’t flying as accurately as Mr. Putin’s.

And then Thirsty appeared and we played us some darts, drank us some beers, and had us some fun.  Oh, and Neil’s also a big fan of the Big Hominid’s blog and he mentioned that he enjoyed reading about me and Kevin meeting up a couple of months ago.

So, that’s the story of how I quenched my thirst for a good night in Itaewon!

 

Metamorphosis

Once upon a time I was a lowly caterpillar crawling through the muck and mud, lost and directionless, unable to find my way.  And then one day I awoke to find myself a butterfly!

But in all seriousness, my political transformation was not this extreme but I can certainly relate to what the author is saying.  My personal biggest irk is #4 and #5 on the list.  The left tends to demonize contrary viewpoints by making shit up.

Sometimes I lose hope for my country, but you never know.  People may actually wake up.  And given the left’s tendency to overreach (the current border crisis comes to mind) maybe we’ll actually get the Change we were Hoping for.

Sadly, the Republicans aren’t much better than the Democrats, so I’m not sure that winning a Senate majority will make much difference.

The link is worth the read.

 

 

Farewell, so long…

…I’ll be the same tomorrow.

But things will be different here as two, well technically three, old timers are moving on.  Two goodbye parties yesterday made for a bittersweet weekend.

Doug is being returned to Columbus, OH after 21 years in Korea.  He goes involuntarily having (finally) ran afoul of DoD's "five year rule" which requires civilians to rotate out of overseas assignments after five years in country.

Doug is being returned to Columbus, OH after 21 years in Korea. He goes involuntarily having (finally) ran afoul of DoD’s “five year rule” which requires civilians to rotate out of overseas assignments after five years in country.

Bill and June are excited about their move to Vietnam where Bill will teach at the international school in what appears to be an outstanding opportunity for the family.

Bill and June are excited about their move to Vietnam after 10 years in Korea.   Bill will teach at the international school in what appears to be an outstanding opportunity for the family.

.I wish them well and thank them for the memories.

 

About last night

So, I had my typical Friday night of darts at Dolce Vita although somewhat atypically I managed a first place finish.  My nephew Justin came by the bar for a couple of beers and then we headed out to the samgyapsal joint I favor.

As is our normal practice the conversation soon turned to politics. And when I start getting wound up my voice gets somewhat intense.  Not shouting really, just kind of aggressive.  I was in this mode when the waitress came to our table and shushed me.  Now, I was taken aback by this because it was just the two of us at the table surrounded by crowded tables of loud Koreans drinking and laughing and enjoying their grilled pork belly. Which is how it should be.  I mean, this was not a fine dining establishment. And to be honest about it, I may have been talking louder than normal if only to be heard above the din of the surrounding crowd. As I looked around the room and noticed just how loud everyone else was being I got pissed off.

At that very moment the waitress who had offended me was serving the largest and loudest table of Koreans in the joint. So I turned around and said (probably shouted) “are you going to tell them to be quiet too, or is it only the miguks who aren’t allowed to make noise?”  Of course, I said this in English so I’m sure she didn’t understand most of it, but it did appear from her reaction that she got my point.  I turned back to my nephew and said “am I wrong?”.  He agreed that we hadn’t been louder than anyone else but he said he was embarrassed by my outburst.

I guess in retrospect I am too. This is not the first time I’ve encountered being singled out for noise when Koreans are notoriously loud when dining (especially when soju is involved) and seem to be ignored. But responding to racism with rudeness is not the solution.  I’m sure all I did was perpetuate a negative stereotype when I loudly confronted the waitress.  I should have just let it go like I normally do I suppose.

I think it is also true that English voices tend to stand out in the crowd so to speak.  I’ve noticed it on the subway myself that foreigners always sound louder when they are speaking together.  Upon *ahem* more sober reflection perhaps I sounded louder than I was.

Meanwhile, I was again awakened early this morning by noise from the downstairs park. This time it was two ajummas shouting at each other. And so it goes.

Oh, I also doused my keyboard in diet Coke this morning.  I did my best to clean it up quickly, but as I feared some of the keys are now not functioning correctly. Which made typing this post especially challenging.  Ain’t life grand?

 

 

If you build it they will come

Things are pretty ugly in our nation’s capital.  Via BuzzFeed comes this article chock full of pictures of some of the worst buildings in Washington, D.C.  Well, I guess it’s only fitting that we house our crappy government in appropriately crappy office space.

I actually had the misfortune of working in two of them and had occasion to visit most of the others during my long years of government service.  L’Enfant Plaza housed Postal Service Headquarters.  I technically only worked there for a few months in the summer of 1998 during collective bargaining agreement negotiations with the National Association of Letter Carriers.  Many other days were wasted there for mindless meetings with the HQ brass though.  I also spent five soul-sucking years working within the walls of the Department of Education building.  How bad was it?  I preferred working in Iraq and actively pursued employment there, albeit without success.  I did wind up in Korea though and that was almost like being reborn after all those hellish years in D.C.

Which is why catching the Virginia Railway Express at L'Enfant station for the last time filled me with unbridled joy...

Which is why catching the Virginia Railway Express at L’Enfant station for the last time filled me with unbridled joy…

How great thou art

This morning at 0600 I awoke to the sound of Amazing Grace being sung by one of the drunk ajusshis who frequent the park outside my apartment building.  To his credit he could carry a melody.  Although it must have been the only song he knew because he repeated it for an hour or so.  The way our buildings are configured the park makes a near perfect amphitheater.  And with the window open in deference to the July heat it sounded like he was in the next room.  Which made going back to sleep impossible for a wretch like me.

Ah well, just another day in paradise.

Ha!  It sounded a lot like this:

Here’s to your health!

According to this report smelling farts may help prevent cancer.  I mentioned this to Jee Yeun this morning and she noted that that was only true in small doses.  I’m not sure what she was implying, but I owe it to her to do everything I can to keep her cancer free.

Although apparently the science on this is not “settled”.  And if we continue passing wind for the benefit of our friends and neighbors health are we not running the risk of increased global warming?  Damned if you do, damned if you don’t I suppose.

I get knocked down…

…but I get up again, you’re never gonna keep me down.

AT&T won’t unlock.  So, I bought a new phone.  Actually, I got the new phone basically free with a two year service commitment.  Which means I’m paying for phone plans on two continents now.  Although SK is only charging me around $35 bucks a month.  And I’m going to change my plan with AT&T and save at least that much.

It’s a sweet phone–Galaxy S-3 very similar to my US phone.  So, I’m familiar with the interface at least.

The real reason for this post though is I signed up for Google Analytics (hey I was bored) and I want to see how (or if) it works.

<script>
(function(i,s,o,g,r,a,m){i[‘GoogleAnalyticsObject’]=r;i[r]=i[r]||function(){
(i[r].q=i[r].q||[]).push(arguments)},i[r].l=1*new Date();a=s.createElement(o),
m=s.getElementsByTagName(o)[0];a.async=1;a.src=g;m.parentNode.insertBefore(a,m)
})(window,document,’script’,’//www.google-analytics.com/analytics.js’,’ga’);

ga(‘create’, ‘UA-52645894-1’, ‘auto’);
ga(‘send’, ‘pageview’);

</script>

Lock blockers

As I mentioned in the previous post, I killed my phone last night.  That was the Galaxy S-2 I inherited from my nephew.  I am loathe to purchase a new smartphone, especially given the fact that I already “own” a perfectly fine Galaxy S-3.  When I first got back to Korea I attempted to have SK telephone install a new sim card in my U.S. phone but was told it could not be done because the dicks folks at AT&T had “locked” the phone in a manner that could not be legally undone.

As our president has demonstrated on numerous occasions, laws are for the little people.  And I am many things but little is not among them.  So I set about trying to unlock my phone on my own.  Found a handy website that offered step-by-step instructions on doing just that and I followed them to the best of my ability.  Alas, the assholes geniuses at AT&T had apparently installed a block to the unlock, because the lock would not open in the manner the website had promised.  I guess it wouldn’t have mattered anyway because after going through the unlocking process twice I discovered that the sim card from the S-2 doesn’t fit in the S-3.

What I find especially irksome is I’m paying AT&T a whopping $143.00 a month for the U.S. service I’m only using six months a year (that’s mine and Jee Yeun’s phone and data plan charges).  I do this for the privilege of keeping my American phone number which I need to maintain for a host of reasons I won’t bother discussing here.  But I’ve been on the AT&T plan for well over a year fulfilling my commitment which means I own the smartphones I bought when I signed up.  Anyway, when I turned my S-3 back on after the unsuccessful unlocking effort, I got a message from AT&T welcoming me to Korea and advising I could set up an international plan by calling (for free!) a number they provided.

I don’t need or want an international plan, but I would like my phone unlocked.  So I called.  And the pleasant AT&T customer service rep advised that requests to unlock have to be submitted through the website.  So that’s where I went and that’s what I did.  And somewhere between two and five days from now I’ll have my answer.  Which better be “yes” or I’m going to make some changes.  To hell with the consequences, I will not be denied!

Yobo Gangnam style

A photo blog of yesterday’s birthday celebration.

While Jee Yeun was still sleeping I went out to the local Paris Baguette and purchased a tasty birthday cake.  That's 4 tall candles and 9 small ones.  You can do the math.

While Jee Yeun was still sleeping I went out to the local Paris Baguette and purchased a tasty birthday cake. That’s 4 tall candles and 9 small ones. You can do the math.

In the evening we ventured out to a small restaurant in Gangnam that had come highly recommended.  We were not disappointed!  They feature various cuts of pork cooked at the table Korean BBQ style.  Although they actually supplied a cook to do the grilling properly.  He even had a clever laser-like device to make sure the grill was the right temperature for optimum cooking.

In the evening we ventured out to a small restaurant in Gangnam that had come highly recommended. We were not disappointed! They feature various cuts of pork cooked at the table Korean BBQ style. Although they actually supplied a cook to do the grilling properly. He even had a clever laser-like device to make sure the grill was the right temperature for optimum cooking.

All the cuts were tender and juicy.  The "skirt meat" tasted just like beef.

All the cuts were tender and juicy. The “skirt meat” tasted just like beef.

We then cabbed over to a famous jazz joint called Once in a Blue Moon.  I had the unique experience of drinking my first W17,000 beer which not so coincidentally was the cheapest beverage on the menu.  The music was good and all, but the prices were too rich for my blood.  Suffice to say I can only afford to visit this establishment once in a blue moon.

We then cabbed over to a famous jazz joint called Once in a Blue Moon. I had the unique experience of drinking my first W17,000 beer which not so coincidentally was the cheapest beverage on the menu. The music was good and all, but the prices were too rich for my blood. Suffice to say I can only afford to visit this establishment once in a blue moon.

We decided that we could make our own music much cheaper, so we ended the night at a nice little norebang.  I have some pictures, but I apparently dropped my phone at some point last night.  I’ve got spiderweb cracks on the screen which is otherwise dark.  I’m sure that faux pas is going to cost me more than the rest of the night combined.

Ah well, Jee Yeun said it was the best birthday she’s had this year.  So there’s that.