F.I.A.S.C.O.

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Fucking insane and stupid crap occurring.

Today I was supposed to go to San Fernando in the neighboring province of Pampanga to shop for a new Fitbit. Shortly before my driver (yeah, I have a driver, get over it) was scheduled to pick me up I got a message that my future landlord was on his way from Manila. Thanks for letting me know! So, I canceled my shopping and waited for the landlord’s arrival. He got here at one o’clock.

The purpose of this impromptu visit was apparently to get the electricity and water turned on at the house, and put in my name of course. So, off we went. And went. The electric company main office is two cities over and the journey took almost 45 minutes. Did I mention it is rainy season in the Philippines? Well, it rained in torrents (a torrent is more than a bucket, right?) almost all day long. By far the heaviest rain I ever seen here. Which led to some flooding. The National Highway upon which we were traveling looked more like a river than a road. Made for slow going to be sure.

So, we arrive at the electric cooperative offices and it seemed that my landlord, Mr. Ocampo, was a familiar face. That was something of a relief. But then the trouble started. It seems the previous tenant left an outstanding bill to the tune of 23,000 pesos ($460) and the power company wouldn’t budge on signing me up until the arrears had been reconciled. And Mr. Ocampo was just as adamant that he was not paying for a bill he did not personally incur. So, the upshot as I understand it is that there is some paperwork in Manila that will be gathered to resolve the conflict and we will return and try again on Monday.

On the long return trip to my neck of the woods Mr. Ocampo told me the story of the previous tenant of my future house. It seems an American purchased the property in the name of his Filipina wife (the only way it can be done). Apparently they had a young daughter together. Anyway, the wife said she needed a driver and suggested they hire her “cousin” for the job. There is a basement room for live-in staff. Well, long story short, the husband finds out that the driver is banging his wife when he is not around. Except it turns out that the cousin wasn’t a cousin after all. He was the Filipina’s husband. The American of course bailed out and the house was foreclosed by Mr. Ocampo.

Well. Given my luck and history with women, perhaps I’ll be able to continue this house’s ill-fated traditions in matters of the heart. Although I hope that won’t be the case.

Anyway, I did get the water put in my name today and the repair crew has indicated that the house will be ready to occupy next Friday when I’m supposed to vacant my apartment. Hmm, methinks I’m going to see if I can get a one week extension here.

Second place finish in darts tonight. My partner was a sweet and cute 21 year old. Between matches she related the story of her previous boyfriend. He was 68. And now he’s dead. Maybe it was my imagination but I got the distinct impression she was hinting that I might make a suitable replacement. I guess she wants to see what it’s like with a younger man. Did I mention she is a hottie?

No. I’m not going to go there. It would be insanity. She’s not at all what I’m looking for.

But.

God help me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JywK_5bT8z0

Immigration man

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Today’s adventure found me at the immigration office in downtown Olongapo. Yes, my initial 30 day no visa entry has just about reached it’s expiration so I needed to request another 30 days. And that’s just what I did.

I’m clean as a whistle. A model non-citizen!

So I paid my 3500 pesos (around $70) got the requested extension stamped into my passport and was on my way. Easy peasey. Next go round I can get my ARC (alien registration card) and an additional 60 days as a tourist. Although hopefully I’ll be completing the process for my retirement visa (basically granting me permanent residency) by then.

Exciting times, no?

There he was with his immigration face
Giving me a paper chase
But the sun was coming
Cos all at once he looked into my space
And stamped a number over my face
And it sent me running
Let me in – let me in – immigration man
Can I cross the line and pray
I can stay another day
Let me in immigration man
I won’t toe your line today
I can’t see it anyway.

Missing in action

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Here’s how my day started. How about yours?

Well, my landlord never showed up yesterday. Didn’t respond to my text messages and when I called I got some recording that “the phone was unattended or out of service” whatever the fuck that means. Seriously, I’m paying a premium for a house that has been vacant for over a year and the landlord can’t be bothered to let me know what the hell is going on?

So, I’ve been despairing that the house of my dreams may be the stuff of nightmares. I did some neighborhood reconnaissance during my morning walk in search of a viable “Plan B”. I need to be out of my current abode by June 15 and that clock is ticking. I got a few phone numbers and saw some possibilities, but it still amounts to settling for less than I want. At this stage of my life I’ve had just about enough of settling, thank you very much.

In desperation I contacted the construction guy that is supposed to be doing the repair work on “my” house. He said he was submitting the the cost estimate to the landlord TODAY. Ten days after we did the walk through! He also confirmed that Mr. Ocampo (the landlord) is tough to get a hold of. Tell me about it.

Anyway, I enlisted the support of Gem (bless her heart) to see if she can find out if there was any reason to think the deal would go through. She couldn’t reach Ocampo by phone either, but called his office. The secretary took her message and later Ocampo’s wife called to say “yes, the deal was still on”. Hmm. Finally, Ocampo called Gem and told her he had been ill (LBM) so he wasn’t able to keep the appointment with me. Since when does diarrhea preclude picking up the fucking phone and letting me know that? Oh well. He assured Gem the deal was still on and the repair work would only take two days to complete. We’ll see.

I would have walked away long ago, but damn, I haven’t found any place I like even half as much (even at half the price). So I’m going to remain cautiously optimistic that this deal is going to happen.

(deep breath, relax, accept the Filipino way)

Darts this afternoon. Good times even though I didn’t finish in the money.

Enjoyed the sunset on the walk back home.

Facebook yanked my chain with its “memories” feature. Seven years ago the family gathered for a memorial to my mom and dad. We planted a tree in my back yard for each of them. Of course, that life and everything in it (including the house and trees) are gone now.

Everything changes.

But life goes on. Until it doesn’t.

I’ll feel better once I get my house. Might even bring in a helper to keep me company and take care of me. Strictly platonic this time though. Been there, done that, got the scars to prove it.

Down to the wire

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Yesterday’s Hash was a fun time. In fact, it had me in stitches. Let’s go the photos:

Out of the truck at the trail head and ready to rumble, well, ramble anyway…

Climbing these steps proved to be rather, um, tire-ing…

It’s On-On the trail…

How the other half lives. My blessings are counted for this beautiful life I’m living.

As pretty as this path may be, it was leading me to peril… (that’s what we call foreshadowing)

A view from the top…

And the view at the bottom…

“Tractor? I don’t need no stinking tractor!” Old school farming via carabao…

Anyway, along the path I got tangled up in some rusty old razor wire. Why it was there on the ground I have no clue, and just how it wound up wrapped around my calf I can’t say. I do know that it ripped me a good one, that’s for sure.

Assessing the damage when we arrived “On-Home” at Treasure Island…

Speaking of Treasure Island, it’s the resort I stayed in when I first arrived. It’s also very convenient to my current apartment. The staff is friendly (and cute) so it is no surprise I’m a regular there. That paid off because without even asking, one of the waitresses offered me some first aid. Mark, the security guy, came over and thoroughly cleaned the wound with soap and water, then disinfected with hydrogen peroxide.

Then he did a nice job wrapping it all up neat and tidy. I offered to buy him dinner for his efforts but he declined. Later on though I slipped him a 500 peso note (around ten bucks) which he seemed to appreciate.

Got up this morning and did my regular beach walk then popped into Treasure Island (of course) for some breakfast. Afterwards I made my way over to the local hospital.

Our Lady of Lourdes International Medical Center, right here in Barrio Barretto. I’ve asked several folks for the assessment of the care here and they have all said exactly the same thing “it’s where people go to die.” Well, I just wanted someone to take a look at my wound, so I ventured into the emergency room.

And a friendly female doctor and her cute nurse assistant had me all stitched up in no time. They also gave me a tetanus booster shot. Total cost–4,650 pesos. That’s about $95. if you are keeping score.

Also got some prescriptions meds (antibiotics and something else I’m not sure of what it does, anti-inflammatory maybe).

On the walk back I home I popped into the money exchange shop to pick up my Remitly money transfer ($2000.). “Sorry sir, no funds available now. Try back after lunch.”

Then it was over to Western Union to pick up another wire transfer, also for two grand. “Sorry sir, no dollars available. I can pay you in pesos”. Fine. It’s going to be a problem apparently wiring large sums of money over here. I’ve got enough together to pay the advance rent/deposit on my house, but I’m not sure how I’m going to pull together the $10,000 I need to deposit to secure my retirement visa. Ah well, I’ll figure it out.

Speaking of the house, the landlord stood me up yesterday. Was supposed to meet today before lunch. Now I hear he is “on the way” with an ETA of around 2:00. Which precludes my planned playing in a dart tourney this afternoon. And it still does not appear ANY of the promised repairs have been completed. What a pain in the ass this has been.

(taking a deep breath, relaxing, and accepting the Filipino way).

Ah yes, that’s better.

Take the time to close your
Eyes and look around
Cause anyone who helped you out
Can let you down
And look out, look out, look out
The voice is now the choir
Can you feel it getting
Down to the wire?

Well, damn

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As I mentioned in an earlier post, my Fitbit died. And so did my back-up. Both displayed the same symptoms, the batteries refuse to retain a charge. Since I bought them both in Korea, pursuing a warranty remedy is out of the question. So, I begin my quest to purchase a replacement.

A quick online search showed several places where you can order and have them shipped. I’m not comfortable with that option given the transient nature of my housing situation (and the fact that I don’t know my address). So, I looked for retail outlets. At first it seemed I’d have to go to the mall in Angeles City, but then I saw something saying that a place called Tony’s Sport carried them and their webpage indicated a store right here in Olongapo at Harbor Point Mall.

So, I hopped into a Jeepney and made my way to the Subic Bay Freeport Zone (the old Navy base) then hoofed it over to the mall (about a kilometer away). Got to the mall and asked where I might find Tony’s and was told “oh, they closed in 2016:.” WTF? Anyway, I took a deep breath, relaxed, and accepted the Filipino way. Then I walked over to another nearby mall (SM) and had no luck there either. Walked back to the Jeepney stop and came home.

And here I sit with no Fitbit. Maybe I’ll head to Angeles this weekend.

I’ve got the Hash this afternoon so that will be good I hope, even if the steps go unaccounted for. I can actually gauge my step count by time as I consistently have a 7,000 step per hour pace. Still want my Fitbit though!

From this morning’s Fitbitless beach walk…

During which I popped into the Arizona Beach Resort and enjoyed their All-American breakfast. Why wouldn’t I? I’m an All-American boy! And I limited myself to one slice of toast and one taste of hash browns. Still gotta watch those carbs!

Alright then, time to get dressed for today’s Hash…

Our drinking club with a running problem!

Well, I was going to end this post with a joke about time travel. But no one thought it was funny. (Ahem)

Another day

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Hmm, although I now have no excuses time-wise to not post something everyday here at LTG, I’m not sure it’s necessarily a good idea. Want proof? Try this:

A morning beach walk and breakfast. Then a longish walk up the National Highway through Subic town. Rainy season seems to have arrived and the clouds rolled in on the return trek. I ducked into Johannson’s and had a Coke Zero while waiting out the storm. The storm outlasted my patience though so I took a trike back home.

I’ve incorporated a daily nap into my routine now, so I took one.

Played in the dart tourney at Alley Cats bar and finished second. I’m making an effort to be more sociable, but it really is not my nature.

Came home and recharged my e-cigarettes then went to Treasure Island for some dinner (and more beer). Had the orange chicken, it was pretty good. Then I started feeling poorly (too much beer?) and headed back home. Took a two hour nap, woke up, and decided to keep the streak going on the blog by writing this post.

My decision making skills definitely need improvement!

Definitively speaking

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Reflections upon completing three weeks of living in the Philippines.

Well, to begin, I am not depressed. That’s kind of a big deal because on previous visits I’d start feeling overwhelmed with sadness after a week or so. To be sure there is much I’m seeing that is sad, most of which is poverty related, but I’m managing to keep the right attitude so far and I continue to believe and hope that my presence here can make a positive difference, even in a small way. Lord knows I’ve been pumping quite a bit of money into the local economy. I’m sure the San Miguel brewery folks are happy that I’m here!

Of course, not being depressed doesn’t necessarily make you happy either. I’m still a work in progress in that regard. I will say that my attitude and sense of well-being is much improved over my former life in Pyeongtaek. Of course that’s a pretty low bar on the satisfaction scale, but on balance I am content and satisfied with my life here so far. Certainly no regrets about making the move. And once I get settled into my permanent home I’m sure I’ll feel even better about things.

I’ve incorporated a stroll through my future neighborhood into my morning walk routine. That’s gonna be my house someday soon I hope. Although I STILL am not seeing any movement on the promised repairs…

But once the house is ship-shape, I’ll pays my dues and soaks up the views….

Meanwhile, I continue on with the solitary existence to which I’ve become accustomed. I’ve made my share of acquaintances here and I guess I’m another familiar face in the venues I frequent. But of course I crave for more than that. Being alone does have it’s advantages I suppose. Like ample time to think about why I’m alone. And maybe it’s a simple as being out of sync in my definitions of words like “love” and “friendship”. I know what they mean to me, but apparently the people I encounter in life define them in a completely different way. A way that lets them simply walk away without remorse whenever they grow weary of being a friend or lover. It doesn’t work that way for me and I have suffered many disappointments from having believed that those words actual mean to someone else what they mean to me.

And that’s on me of course. If you have unrealistic expectations you are bound to never have them met. It does make me wary moving forward and perhaps that comes across as disinterest to people I’m actually interested in getting to know. Anyway, my smart readers are probably thinking “gee, Captain Obvious, you just know figuring this shit out?” Why yes. Yes I am. I’m a slow learner.

But I’ve got lots of time on my hands. I’m bound to figure it out someday!

Indeed.

After a while you learn
the subtle difference between
holding a hand and chaining a soul
and you learn
that love doesn’t mean leaning
and company doesn’t always mean security.
And you begin to learn
that kisses aren’t contracts
and presents aren’t promises
and you begin to accept your defeats
with your head up and your eyes ahead
with the grace of woman, not the grief of a child
and you learn
to build all your roads on today
because tomorrow’s ground is
too uncertain for plans
and futures have a way of falling down
in mid-flight.
After a while you learn
that even sunshine burns
if you get too much
so you plant your own garden
and decorate your own soul
instead of waiting for someone
to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure
you really are strong
you really do have worth
and you learn
and you learn
with every goodbye, you learn…

–Veronica Shoffstall

All things must pass

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The streak has ended. Finished 4th tonight at darts. Although honestly, I played pretty well and had a decent partner too. Just the way the arrows fly sometimes.

Said a goodbye to a sweet and sassy lass…

Good luck in Thailand, Joana. Have a happy life!

Maybe I’m paranoid, but it seems the gals are sending me subliminal messages…

Are you sure?

Anyway, I’m drunk (again). Had a busy day exchanging dollars for pesos and picking up dollars that I’ve had wired in from the states. Supposed to meet the landlord Monday, but honestly I haven’t seen any of the promised repairs taking place yet (I walk by the house everyday).

And my Fitbit died. Hopefully I can find a replacement soon.

Trying mightily…

Embracing the poetry of life. Whatever gets you through the day.

your life is your life
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
know them.
take them.
you can’t beat death but
you can beat death in life, sometimes.
and the more often you learn to do it,
the more light there will be.
your life is your life.
know it while you have it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
in you.

–Charles Bukowski

Undefeated

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Sad news to learn that one of my Columbia buddies lost his battle with prostate cancer yesterday. 52 years old. Scott “Gunny” Taubl was a Marine tanker and even in retirement continued his service to our nation. Especially in his dedication to veteran’s causes. I first met Gunny when I moved home to South Carolina in 2011. He was an enthusiastic supporter of my efforts to establish a dart organization in Columbia and continued working to build the darting community long after my departure. Just one of those rare and outstanding individuals you encounter on the road of life who has his shit together and makes the world a little bit better place by his presence.

A good man is hard to find. Thank you for your service, may you rest in peace.

One of the things that comes with growing older is seeing people you know start passing away. What’s been especially disconcerting for me is that the last three friends I’ve lost have all been younger than me. Nothing like a slap-in-the-face wake up call from mortality. A good reminder to live the best you can, while you can. And also to take care of the vessel containing our life force.

Another night of darts last night and my undefeated streak (4 now) remains intact. As does my streak of failure with the ladies.

That’s Anabel. She’s a real cutie. I’d like to give her a whirl. She’s made it clear through her actions (and lack of reactions to my overtures) that she’s not interested. A shame that.

Desperate times call for desperate measures:

Maybe this will work?

I was kinda sorta hoping Anabel would join me for some after darts dessert at Treasure Island, but she bailed before the tournament was over. So, I stumbled over alone when I was finished. I was surprised to see one of my waitress favorites all snuggled up with a man at the bar. A fat old fuck (and if I’m saying that, you know he was old and fat). Now, don’t get me wrong. I was not jealous at all. The fact is, I always considered Jessa to be out of my league. Too young and pretty for a slightly less fat and old guy than the one she was with. I was disappointed to see her settling for less than she deserves, but then again, what do I know about her and her situation? I guess it also underscored that I remain alone in a country where the young gals apparently go for fat old fucks.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Trifecta

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Another day, another darts tournament.

And another 1st Place finish! Hey, like I always say better to be lucky than good. Although I do seem to be improving.

In other news, there was a little hiccup with the house. And by hiccup I mean a major miscommunication. I met the landlord yesterday to review the lease agreement. Now, what I recall being discussed was two months rent up front (the security deposit and first month of a 12 month lease). The contract I was presented said two months security deposit, plus one year rent in advance on a three year lease. WTF?

The landlord said that it was a standard practice to pay the rent on an annual basis. Which made some sense seeing as how that was the way it often works under the “key money” concept in Korea. Still, it was a little different when Uncle Sam was footing the bill on my behalf. Anyway, I told the landlord I didn’t have that kind of cash on hand or readily available. So he offered a compromise–the security deposit plus 6 months advance rent. Well, I might be able to swing that.

Anyway, there is work to be done on the house (primarily termite damage in the kitchen and downstairs bathroom). A few other minor repairs as well. He called his construction guy out to the house (a retired American) and we all did a walk around the house together. Really liked the Yank and he will be a good source if and when I need to find some help fixing shit. I won’t be turning over any cold hard cash until I see the place is move-in ready, that’s for sure.

So today I busied myself exchanging the American dollars I have on hand and started the process of getting additional funds wired in from the states. I gave Remitly.com a go, and they actually called me here to verify some identity information. That was cool with me. Apparently, the service is primarily intended to be used within the USA. They wanted to know how long I planned to be in the Philippines. I told them I had a flight out on June 8. Which is technically true. I just have no intention of being on that flight.

I also gave Xoom.com a try. I thought that went smoothly, but just got an email saying they needed a copy of my bank statement and passport. I wrote back and said who the hell gets paper statements from the bank anymore? I did send them a screenshot of the account I want the money transferred from. Also sent the requested copy of my passport. Well, a picture of my passport anyway.

I next went to my old standby, Western Union. They seem to have a bad reputation with the expat community here for some reason. I’ve used them quite a bit in the past, but only for hundreds of dollars, not thousands. They are the only ones (so far at least) who haven’t given me any shit requests for more info yet. They did want to know my log-in and password for my bank account for “verification” purposes. That was disconcerting. I finally went ahead and gave it to them, and they verified whatever they needed to verify. Then I went in and changed my log-in ID and password. So I should be okay. I hope!

Anyway, if all or most of that money from the above outlets comes through, I can pay the rent. We shall see.

More darts on tap for tonight. Life is good.

The first cut is the deepest…

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A good day yesterday. For the most part.

Did my morning beach walk then headed over to my first and probably last “pool party” at Treasure Island. Close observers will note that I’m wearing my Hash shirt, which was my afternoon agenda….

So, there were bar girls frolicking in the pool…

…and engaging in games of some sort. Frankly, I found it all pretty boring and left after consuming the 3 drinks that came with the price of admission.

So, I came back home, took a power nap, then made my way to Johannson’s, the traditional meetup location for the Subic Bay Hash House Harriers. AT the appointed time (3:30) we loaded up and headed for the hills. Literally.

It’s pretty cool that the Hash here has it’s own truck for transport. It’s about as comfortable as it looks…

See what I mean?

The day’s trail…

It’s On-On!

The thing I really like about Hashing is that we hit places I’d never find on my own…

And probably wouldn’t want to walk alone anyway.

But it’s scenic…

And nice to be out and about seeing new sights…

Like these carabao cooling off on a hot day….

And it is nice to get away from town and traffic…

And see how the country folk live….

But watch your step!

It was hot (it’s always hot) but nice…

Your intrepid reporter engaged in Hashing!

This view may be familiar to discerning viewers. Yep, the Hash passed through my soon to be new neighborhood—Alta Vista…

But not for long. This is actually a shanty town right outside Alta Vista….

Finished the Hash at the “On-Home” rooftop of the Hot Zone bar.

The traditional gathering at the end of the trail.

Under a full moon…

Where I had a chance to assess my injuries…

I’m bleeding!

Right leg….

And left leg….both grabbed and stabbed by a heretofore unseen thornbush! Tricky bastard!

Anyway, I will survive. As punishment for spilling blood on the trail, I was directed to drop my pants and sit on this….

It was cold and slippery and the 5 minutes or so were rather unpleasant. Of course, I would never let on about that!

Anyway, I had a blast and will look forward to new adventures every Monday henceforth!

I would have given you all of my heart
But there’s someone who’s torn it apart
And she’s taken just all that I had
But if you want I’ll try to love again
Baby I’ll try to love again but I know

The first cut is the deepest
Baby I know the first cut is the deepest
But when it comes to being lucky she’s cursed
When it comes to loving me she’s the worst

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gXXWjK0tD0

On a roll

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A memorable day yesterday. From what I can recall.

Sunday afternoon darts tournament. Which translates to drinking from one until six p.m. And throwing some arrows into cork.

And for the second day in a row I managed a first place finish. Slowly but surely my game is coming together again.

The only problem with an afternoon tournament is that when it’s done, so am I. Not much I can or want to do as a drunk man in the early evening hours. So I just came home and went to bed early. Which of course resulted in my waking up at o’dark-thirty this morning. Ah well, at least I didn’t have to work. Although oddly enough I did dream about work last night. I’m not sure that I miss working but I think maybe my subconscious is reminding me that there is more to life than darts and drinking.

I’ve got some ideas in that regard, just need to get settled in here first. Really want to get into my new house for example. I’ve been promised the rental contract today. We’ll see.

Meanwhile, on tap for this afternoon is the Treasure Island pool party. Never been to one before, but apparently it involves female staff from the various bars in town gallivanting about in bikinis. Luckily eye candy is on my diet! Afterwards I’ll finally make it out for my return visit to the Subic Bay Hash House Harriers. It’s On-On at Johannsen’s! Ran into one of the Hashers the other night at Cheap Charlies bar and he gave me a ration of shit about being here two weeks with no Hash. Time to get it done.

And of course, today is Memorial Day in the USA. The day set aside to honor and remember those who made the ultimate sacrifice in the defense of freedom. As is my custom, I pause on this day to remember my Great Uncle Frank who remained in Europe after the war.

And he’s one more arrow, flying through the air
One more arrow landing in a shady spot somewhere
Where the days and nights blend into one
And he can always feel the sun
Through the soft brown earth that holds him
Forever always young.

And of course, the Korean War Memorial in Washington, DC:

Here dead we lie
Because we did not choose
To live and shame the land
From which we sprung.

Life, to be sure,
Is nothing much to lose,
But young men think it is,
And we were young.

–Alfred Edward Housman

I can walk and chew gum…

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…at the same time! Who knew?

I came across this article today which links chewing gum while walking with increased calorie burn and hence more weight loss benefit. I figured why not give it a try? Especially after enjoying a french toast breakfast. Sometimes it’s good to be bad. Anyway, I’m walking, chewing, and vaping. How’s that for multi-tasking?

A good night of darts last night. My game is still frustratingly inconsistent, but I hit some big throws when I needed them most which is always satisfying.

Managed a first place finish with a relatively weak partner. That’s progress!

Bottom line though is I’m having fun at the game again and of course enjoying the social interactions that come with playing. That and the beer!

It’s all good.

The new kid in town

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It occurs to me on this, my 15th day in country, that this is longest period I’ve ever stayed at one time. It definitely feels different. Not quite home yet, but then again, it’s been a long time since I’ve felt at home anywhere. At least since the marriage ended.

It’s different in a good way as I’m starting to feel like a member of the expat community now. I see people I know around town and we exchange greetings and it’s just a nice feeling somehow. I’m learning shit too. Had a nice long chat we my neighbor Bill yesterday and he gave me some good pointers on the best way to wire money here. Good stuff to know.

Another new friend is Jerry, who lives out my way on Baloy Beach, plays darts some, and is an avid walker. We had a nice long chat last night at the Alley Hideaway darts bar. He’s been living here for over 12 years now and he pretty much knows everything about everyone it seems. I mentioned my attraction to a certain waitress at Treasure Island and he apparently knows them all by name. When I fessed up that it was Joana I was craving, he said he couldn’t blame me for that. But, as I suspected, Jerry told me she has at least one boyfriend and will be joining him in Thailand soon. Ah well. He advised me to just be patient and the one that is right for me will find me. So yeah, that’s what I’ll do.

Speaking of the Alley bar, I got fitted for my Alley Cats dart team jersey last night. WooHoo! It will be good to be playing league darts again, that’s for sure. Played in a tourney last night and there’s another one tonight, and again tomorrow afternoon. It’s for sure a lot cheaper for me to spend my time with dart pals instead of thirsty bargirls!

Not exactly sure what is going on with “my” house. I still haven’t seen a contract yet. Landlord is in Manila which doesn’t help matters much. Gem is doing her best to facilitate getting things done as promised. So hopefully there will be some movement soon. The caretaker let me inside for another walk around yesterday and I took advantage of the opportunity to snap some photos.

Two voids I need to fill in the kitchen…a stove and a refrigerator.

I’m gonna be lovin’ the view while washing dishes…

A spacious living and dining area. There’s actually an alcove not included in the photo where I’ll set up my television (also to be purchased).

The downstairs bathroom is rather unique. It’s pretty much an open-air shower set up. I think it looks pretty cool, but I’m already thinking it creates easy access for mosquitoes and the like. I doubt I’ll rarely if ever shower in there though.

Instead I’ll be using the handy master bath with a walk-in shower.

The master bedroom is plenty nice with built in closet/storage space and a great little balcony featuring the awesome bay view I’m paying a pretty penny for…

Anyway, that and two more bedrooms and a bath completes the package. Hope things turn out. Because whatever thought I had of saving money by moving upstairs from my current place to a more spacious and well-appointed apartment were dashed by this:

That’s the only access road to my current digs. Rainy season seems to have kicked off with afternoon thundershowers. We had a pretty good rain last night. I took a trike home which is good because otherwise I’d have been swimming across Lake Baloy to get home. This photo was taken this afternoon when the waters had receded enough to get around the edge without wading. That will not be the case once the rains come in full force. No thank you!

That’s it for today’s snapshot of life in the Philippines. It’s far from perfect here, but it is also oh so much better than the pathetic life I left behind.

There’s talk on the street
It sounds so familiar
Great expectations, everybody’s watching you
People you meet
They all seem to know you
Even your old friends treat you like you’re something new

Johnny come lately, the new kid in town
Everybody loves you, so don’t let them down

You look in her eyes
The music begins to play
Hopeless romantics, here we go again
But after awhile
You’re lookin’ the other way
It’s those restless hearts that never mend

Johnny come lately, the new kid in town
Will she still love you when you’re not around?

There’s so many things you should have told her
But night after night you’re willing to hold her
Just hold her
Tears on your shoulder

There’s talk on the street
It’s there to remind you
It doesn’t really matter which side you’re on
You’re walking away
And they’re talking behind you
They will never forget you ’til somebody new comes along

Where you’ve been lately? There’s a new kid in town
Everybody loves him
Don’t they?
Now he’s holding her, and you’re still around

Oh, my, my
There’s a new kid in town
Just another new kid in town

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAy49P8Tjuw

Taking stock

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5

Two weeks into my life of leisure, where do things stand?

Well, I’m living large. Too large? Maybe still too much in the tourist mode, but I’m not bleeding red ink so it’s all good. I do keep track of my expenses on a handy phone app, here’s how it breaks down thus far:

Rent: 22,000 ($440.)
Eating out: 16,500 ($375.)
Transportation: 13,000 ($260.)
Drinking: 12,500 ($245.)
Charity: 10,000 ($200.)
Groceries: 7300 ($145.)
Domestic help: 5,000 ($100.)
Shopping: 4300 ($86.)
Entertainment: 2450 ($45.)
Phone: 1100 ($22.)
Laundry: 1070 ($21.)
Medical/Pharmacy 950 ($19.)
Hair/Feet 90 ($1.80)

So, double those totals and I’m still well within my monthly budget. When I start eating in more often, that should reduce food costs some. Rent will be going up of course. And I suppose if I have the good fortune to find a girlfriend, that will inevitably reduce my fortune somewhat. Just need to be sure she is worth it!

I walked on the old Navy base yesterday, and found this little piece of Korea inside the Harbor Point mall:

Korean culture is huge here. The girls love the K-Pop and Korean dramas….

Sad to report a pretty disappointing night out on the town last night.

These two sweeties from Alaska bar were the highlight of the evening. They assisted me in distributing kisses to all the dancers. Hershey’s kisses that is…

Of course, I wasn’t going to sit there buying lady drinks all night. I ain’t quite that lonely yet. So I moved on to a bar I hadn’t tried before called Rolling Stone. The minute I sat down, some random bargirl joined me at the table. I tried to explain that I wasn’t interested in her company, but she ignored my entreaty and began stroking me. Well, that rubbed me the wrong way (ahem) so I quaffed my brew and left the joint.

I really don’t like drink pressure. I’m generous enough and I’ll buy at the time of my choosing. Ask me and I’m unlikely to buy at all. I’m better off sticking with the hotel/resort bars where the staff has no incentive to drink on your dime. And of course, the dart bars are a refuge as well. Anyway, I did go back to Treasure Island for a night cap. Joana (a gal I’m smitten with) seemed more aloof than usual which turned my already sour mood more dour. Finished the night drinking alone at Lagoon Resort.

Yeah, I’m looking for love in all the wrong places, I know. Speaking of which, I reactivated by Filipina Cupid account today. What could go wrong?

Whatever it is, you’ll hear about it here first. Stay tuned!

The world is turning…

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…I hope it don’t turn away.

Good morning from paradise! I’m starting to feel solid again, if you get my meaning.

Apparently there was a scheduled power outage from 0600 to 0800 this morning. I didn’t get the word until everything went dark. Ah well, had a nice chat out on the patio with my neighbor Bill. Interesting Yank, been here three years now and professes to love it. I enjoyed hearing some of his yarns and I’m looking forward to making some of my own in the coming days, weeks, months and years.

Took off on my morning beach walk then popped into Treasure Island (which had power via a generator) for breakfast and a little flirting with the wait staff. My favorite, Joana, wasn’t working today. She lives in Olongapo City and I’d asked her to see if the fresh market there sold any fresh celery. She brought some into work with her yesterday. I was grateful for her efforts (the market in Barretto never has any) even if the celery itself isn’t up to American standards.

Skinny and limp though it may be, still tasty when dipped into a jar of creamy peanut butter…

I semi-teasingly asked Joana if she was looking for a boyfriend and she responded “I have enough boyfriends to last me ten years”. Love her attitude. Alas, it appears the attraction is a one-way street.

After a satisfying 3-egg omelette with ham, cheese, and mushrooms I recommenced my walk.

I walked by my soon to be future home…

….and then returned home via the beach walk…

Yesterday I played in the local dart league and then last night I played in the Wednesday night tournament. It was a lot of darts and a lot of beers kinda day. In fact, during the almost two weeks since my arrival I’ve played more darts than I have in the last two years. I’m starting to recapture the old passion for the game again. I’m slowly regaining some of my former prowess, but I remain way too inconsistent. I did throw my second ton-80 and racked up two second place finishes. Lost both times to older Filipinas who are both outstanding darters. I definitely need to be on my game to be competitive here.

I guess I’ve been drafted to play league with the Alley Hideaway Bar “Alley Cats”. Suits me fine. The team captain, Anabel, is a cutie. She calls me “Kuya” which means older brother. I asked her how do you say “boyfriend” in Tagalog. She told me, then laughed and said she’d just call me John. Struck out again, apparently.

Anyway, I’m feeling more and more at home and comfortable in my life here, solitary though it may be. There is still a void waiting to be filled, but I’m going to bide my time and patiently wait for nature to take its course. If she is worthy, she will find me.

Now I’m livin’
out here on the beach,
but those seagulls are
still out of reach.
The world is turnin’
I hope it don’t turn away

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKgj1FNToWY

Living large

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8

This pretty much captures the sentiment underlying my move to the Philippines:

I’ve sacrificed enough of my future lamenting the mistakes of the past, don’t you think?

One giant step forward is reaching a decision on where I’ll be laying my weary head in the future. And so I have.

The approach…

The view from the street…

The front entrance…

The “other” side of the house…

The back side features a dirty kitchen/maid’s quarters on the bottom, a balcony on the first floor living area, and a balcony off the master bedroom…

But this view is what ultimately sealed the deal for me. Even better from inside the house. Every day I will wake up and be reminded of why I came to the Philippines…

So, the house is not perfect. It’s been vacant for over a year and needs some serious maintenance. The landlord promised to get right on that and said it should be move in ready in two weeks. I’ll be responsible for providing two a/c units for the upstairs bedrooms, a refrigerator, and a stove. I’m sure I’ll need to fill out the existing spartan furnishings as well.

The rent is 45,000 pesos a month ($900.). That’s at the top end of what I had budgeted for housing. I can afford it but obviously, every dollar spent on housing is one less available for other things, like travel. Anyway, I’ve got sufficient savings as well, so I’m not going to have to curtail any of my retirement dreams in order to live large in this large house. And besides, did you see that view! It’s worth it to me and that’s what matters most.

Stopped in at a local pharmacy this morning to get something for my LBM (liquid bowel movement). I thought it would run its course, but last night was as bad as ever. Anyway, the pharmacy gave me a one week regimen of antibiotics (without a prescription!) and some other pills to take after every poop. Here’s hoping that firms shit up.

My own personal pharmacy. Hey, as long as it keeps me on my feet and active, I’ll be happy.

Fitbit has indicted me for collusion with the Russians. Apparently.

This badge represents a lifetime distance of 5,772 miles—the same length as the Trans-Siberian Railway in Russia! With an achievement this big, it looks like you’re en route to destination fitness.

Ah well, I’ll continue on being a self-satisfied smug bastard. Thank you very much!

Checking in, checking up, checking out

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Looked at four properties today. All coincidentally 45,000 pesos per month ($900.). I’m leaning towards one, but haven’t made a final decision as yet. Gonna sleep on it.

In other news, I’m monitoring my vital stats and it seems to be a mixed bag since the move. Back in Korea, my blood pressure was usually in the mid 130s. Here in the Philippines, it’s been in the 1-teens. Last night in fact it was an almost scary 109/66. This morning, I was 114/79.

Conversely, my resting heart rate was in the high 60s, here it is in the high 70s. Not sure why that might be.

Also monitoring the weight, it’s been up and down but most recently up. I’ve been lacking some dietary discipline and imbibing more fluids (i.e. beer) because of the hot weather. Things will settle down soon enough I expect.

Going to head out and take one more gander at the house I’m considering. Will give a fuller report on the search efforts tomorrow. Stay tuned!

Cheers!

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9

Or as we say in the Philippines “Tagay!”

While I was enjoying my solitary breakfast this morning at Arizona resort it occurred to me that it feels like I’m still on vacation. I was wondering how long that feeling might last, and then I thought “Hell, wouldn’t it be great if everyday for the rest of my fucking life felt like a vacation day?” Here’s to hoping that’s the case.

Ten days into this new life now and in some ways it’s starting to feel like home. I’ve got my regular hangouts where I’m always greeted with a hearty “welcome back, Sir John!”. Yeah, they’re bar staff and they work for tips, but still. Actually, I had a pleasant chat with Jerry, the manager of Treasure Island where I spend quite a bit of my “bar time”. And Barretto being the small town that it is, I’m also on a first name basis with a few of the local expats. So that’s nice. I’m sure with time I’ll integrate myself more fully into our happy little community here.

Anyway, the house search continues apace. The one across the street that I posted yesterday is a no go. The owner responded to my email yesterday saying she had decided that she only wants to sell, not rent or lease. And sure enough this morning I see the sign has been modified crossing out rent and lease.

The beachfront house viewing has been rescheduled for tomorrow morning. I did a walk-by yesterday and I’m not too hopeful that it will meet my needs. As I said it is very pricey and from what I saw, not worth it. Maybe I’ll be pleasantly surprised, but I’m not counting on it.

Tomorrow afternoon I’m meeting with the owner of some houses in the coveted Alta Vista subdivision. My understanding is he has three. And if I got the right information from the security guard, this is one of them:

The front.

The back.

The long view.

I walked by this morning and took a closer look without actually trespassing. It does not appear to have an occupant, although there is furniture inside. Both are good signs if I’m correct in my assumption. I like the location in that it is the first house once you come through the security gate, so that makes for easy access. Whether it is high enough up the hill to afford the views I’m hoping for remains to be seen, but I’m thinking at least from the upstairs I should have bay and mountain views.

One downside is that it has a smallish yard and it is not fenced. That raises some security concerns (although the house is within view of the guard shack) and also makes my dog plans more complicated. I’ll ask the owner about fencing at least part of the yard. Otherwise, I really like the place and can picture myself living there for the long term.

So that’s today’s update. Yeah, how about that. Daily blogging here at LTG. Well, after all, I do have more hours to fill these days. Now I can bore you loyal readers to tears more often.

Cheers!

Making your way in the world today takes everything you’ve got.
Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.

Wouldn’t you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name,
and they’re always glad you came.
You wanna be where you can see,
our troubles are all the same
You wanna be where everybody knows
Your name.

Ton-80

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4

Today was a good day.

Played darts at Alley Cats. Threw my first 180 in the Philippines.

For those who don’t know, a ton-80 looks like this (three triple 20s) and is the highest possible score in the ’01 game

In recognition of this rare event for pub league players, the bar gave me a coupon for a free drink. Just what I needed, more beer. Right?

More importantly, me and my partner managed to go through the winner’s bracket undefeated and take 1st place money for our efforts.

Ain’t she sweet? I mean, isn’t she a good looking dart player….er, we played well with each other. Ah, fuck…never mind!

Now, I ain’t saying that throwing a ton-80 and winning a tourney is enough to make you a celebrity in this town, but…

Just sayin’….

Anyway, it was a great afternoon of competitive darts with a good group who placed a premium on keeping it fun. It was!

Here’s a funny story that illustrates just what a small town Barrio Barretto truly is.

That’s my friend John and his girlfriend Mango. We got together for awhile on Friday evening at the SOB dance contest.

During the course of the conversation, Mango mentioned she had a friend I should meet. Apparently, this gal is somewhere around 26 years old and works at a local gift shop. I knew the gift shop because I had stopped in there back in January to by some sunglasses for Gem. Anyway, to counter my protestations that she was a bit young for me (which in retrospect was probably rude, Mango is 21, John is 66), Mango noted that this gal usually dates men younger than her and is continually disappointed. In part because they don’t have a pot to piss in. Mango said her friend had mentioned wanting to find an older guy who could support her financially like John does her (basically a small allowance). Mango also told me that her friend was half Filipina, half American, but that she looks American.

Well, I was non-committal. I mean, I’m thinking the best way to meet a “good” someone would be through an introduction by mutual friends. But, I didn’t really retire to the Philippines to hook up with an American looking woman less than half my age. Anyway, the conversation moved on and that was that. Or so I thought.

As I mentioned above, I played darts today from 2 p.m. until nearly 6. And it should come as no surprise that I consumed a fair amount of beer during the course of the afternoon. With darts finished, I noted that my fitbit indicated I was still well shy of my 20,000 step goal. So I took a long and roundabout route back home. And wouldn’t you know, I came upon the gift shop where this young woman works. Did I mention I was a little drunk? Anyway, I figured what the hell? Why not just go in and have a look see. And so I did.

The first words out of her mouth were “what are you doing here?”. You see, the young woman in question turned out to be MJ, my dart partner that afternoon. And then it all started making sense. I mean, even though MJ speaks fluent Tagalog, she doesn’t look like a Filipina (although truthfully, she looks pretty damn fine!). I just didn’t make the connection between her and the woman Mango described.

So, I told her that I was friends with John and Mango and they thought I should meet you. I guess we both found that pretty funny. And then I remembered something else. When I bought the sunglasses back in January, she was the person who sold them to me. Why do I remember that mundane detail? Because later that night she came into the bar where I was drinking. It was one of those “U” shaped bars and she was sitting across from me. We made eye contact and she said, you look familiar. How do I know you? I had to think about it myself, but then remembered I had seen her that afternoon in the store.

Anyway, it was another reminder of the joys of small town living. Or something.