Alone again (naturally)

I’ve been around some places in this life.  I moved out of the house I shared with my parents on Milton Avenue in Westminster CA in July, 1973 at the tender age of 17.  Moved into an apartment on Magnolia Avenue in Garden Grove with a neighborhood pal.  I had two girlfriends at the time, Gail and Karen.  Karen lived down San Diego way so it wasn’t too difficult to make sure they were never in the same place at the same time.

A few months later I moved further down (up?) Magnolia to Huntington Beach and shared an apartment with my brother Keith.  I was living there when I had the misfortune of bringing Karen home with me from San Diego while Gail was amongst the friends having an impromptu party at my place.  So shortly thereafter I found myself with zero girlfriends.

About a year later I was dating Bridget and knocked her up.  So we took an apartment in Midway City during her pregnancy with the intention of giving the baby up for adoption. Turns out once I saw my baby girl I wanted to keep her, so I married Bridget.

We rented a nice little house on 22nd Street in Westminster from my parents and engaged in the family life.  Before long my son Kevin came along and we started dreaming of raising our kids somewhere other than Southern California. I managed to secure a transfer of my letter carrier job to the mile high city of Prescott, AZ.

Rented a nice little house on Western Avenue sight unseen, this was before the internet, I found it advertised in the Prescott Courier.  I don’t recall where I managed to get my hands on a copy though.

Anyway, Prescott might just be the best place I ever did live.  Back then it was a bustling little metropolis of 25,000 souls nestled in the Bradshaw Mountains.  It seemed like a place I could spend a lifetime in, so I became a first time homeowner in a sweet little house on San Carlos Road.

We were living there when the marriage fell apart, so I rented a place on the other side of town on Shadow Valley Road.  It was one of those modified A-frame cabin-like things, and I shared it with two random roommates.  I fell in love with a Phoenix gal whom I met in Flagstaff and was attending graduate school in Pocatello, Idaho.  I only got to see her on the occasional weekend when I’d make the drive up north and during school breaks when she’d come home.  Thought she was going to marry me but then she wound up pregnant. With another man’s baby.

That was a pretty devastating blow and I felt the need to change my life.  So I took a job in Fort Smith, AR and rented me an apartment in the illogically named El Conquistador complex.  At least I was close to my kids again who had been staying with my mom and dad on their little 80 acre ranch across the border in Monroe, OK.

I experienced a rather lonely year before the locals determined I was “all right” despite my odd accent.  I had some success with the ladies and eventually started staying with Pamela in her apartment in Poteau, OK.  Got bored after awhile so I moved back into Fort Smith and commenced to dating Iris and Darla.  Iris was seven years older than me and Darla was 7 years younger.  I fantasized about putting Iris’ brain in Darla’s body.  Failing that, i settled for Beckie and moved into her fine house back in Poteau.  We got married and I got promoted and we moved to ourselves and the kids off to Columbia, SC where we rented a house on Greengate street.

Of course, the kids had grown accustomed to having horses, so we bought a house in Lexington on 2/12 acres that was zoned for horses.  In fact, all the streets were named after horses.  We lived on Shetland Lane.

As testament to my selfishness and degenerate character I fell in love with another woman.  Beckie moved out and Carol moved in.  Not long afterwards I got promoted to a job in Arlington, VA.  I lived a few months in an apartment in Crystal City before purchasing a house in Stafford where Carol joined me.

A few years later my misbehavior led me to rent an apartment in Arlington, but eventually I returned home to my house and wife.

In January 2005 I took a job in Seoul and had a government paid for villa in Hannam-dong. Carol was supposed to join me there but got cold feet and backed out.  I chose to stay in Korea rather than return to my American life.

I made several trips to the Philippines where the young women were more than willing to assuage my loneliness.  Then I met Se Hwa through a Korean dating site and she moved in with me for a year and a half.  She left me to move to the USA for a Masters Degree.  And there she remains as far as I know.

Not long after Se Hwa left I met Jee Yeun and we’ve been together ever since.  When I retired I bought us a house on Lockleven Drive in Columbia.  When we stayed in Seoul we lived in an apartment in Gireum-dong.

And now it has come to pass that I’m living in cozy villa in Itaewon.

By my reckoning, during the 43 years of my adult life I’ve spent roughly three years on my own.  It takes some getting used to.

 

 

Still in the game

Sorry for the lack of posts.  Dealing with some issues I’m not prepared to share here yet, but I’ll find my way through.  I was lamenting to a bar friend about the forlorn state of my psyche, when this stranger walks up to me and says “I’m sorry to eavesdrop, but don’t ever give up!”  Then she asked if I’d ever read “The Laughing Heart” by Charles Bukowski.  Now, I’m a sucker for poetry and have read some of Bukowski’s stuff, but never this particular poem.  So I grabbed my phone and pulled it up for a quick read:

your life is your life
don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission.
be on the watch.
there are ways out.
there is a light somewhere.
it may not be much light but
it beats the darkness.
be on the watch.
the gods will offer you chances.
know them.
take them.
you can’t beat death but
you can beat death in life, sometimes.
and the more often you learn to do it,
the more light there will be.
your life is your life.
know it while you have it.
you are marvelous
the gods wait to delight
in you.

Well, that hit the spot.  And I was very moved by the random act of kindness of the person who reached out and shared it.

I’m still in the game, aren’t I?

Say it was only a dream

Last night I dreamed there was a Paris-like attack on the Army base at Yongsan.  Except it was on a much larger scale.  It was vivid and detailed.  And it was a joint effort by the North Koreans and ISIS.  I woke up before I could do anything heroic though, and had difficulty going back to sleep.

Then this morning I came across this article about the alleged ties between the North and ISIS and it was a bizarre feeling for sure.

The reality is I doubt such an attack on the base could be pulled off.  But I’ve taken note of the fact that Itaewon offers ample opportunities for soft targets frequented by Westerners. All of us unarmed.  Although I suppose a bunch of armed drunks wouldn’t provide much sense of security either.

When I get a Round Tuit

blog

Had in mind to blog this morning about politics.  Then I couldn’t be bothered.  Tomorrow I’ll be heading down Songtan way to represent the Itaewon dart league against those Osan boys.  We rented us a bus for the trip so it oughta be relatively hassle free.

And that’s all I got for now.  Unless you want to hear about the chili I’m cooking.  Didn’t think so.

And there it is.

And there it is.

Still crazy after all these years

Thanks yobo!

Thanks yobo!

So, another birthday, number 60. Sixty is traditionally a special milestone in Korean culture.  As commenter Kevin Kim helpfully shared:

That’s five times around the twelve-year Chinese zodiac, and Koreans normally celebrate this with a special party called “hwan-gap,” a reference to having completed the 60-year cycle. If no one’s said anything to you about hwan-gap plans, it could be that you’ll be in for a surprise on Thursday. And, hey—if you don’t get a proper hwan-gap celebration, go have an awesome meal at your favorite meatateria, anyway.

Well, there was no hwan-gap today for me, Jee Yeun advises that people live so long these days that 60 has lost its significance.  Instead, the big party is for hwan-gab, the 70th birthday.  What a difference a “b” makes, eh?  Here’s hoping I’m still around for the hwan-gab celebration!

Hwan-gap or no, it turned out to be a pretty fine day.  It started with awakening to the flowers pictured above and a sweet card from my spouse.  Then it was off for another day on the chain gang serving the American people to the utmost of my ability.

Although I did take time out for a selfie whilst I contemplated all the wisdom I've accumulated over the years.  It didn't take long.

Although I did take time out for a selfie whilst I contemplated all the wisdom I’ve accumulated over the years. It didn’t take long.

At lunch time my boss and two co-workers joined me for a fine Mexican feast at On the Border in Itaewon.

Upon my return to the office the long awaited email from the embassy was there informing me that MOFAT (Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Trade) had finally seen fit to issue the documentation verifying that my vehicle had been de-registered from it’s former diplomatic status.  So, I hoofed it over to the embassy annex and picked up said paperwork.  Then I hiked over to Camp Kim to get my car registered with USFK.

I had all my required paperwork, but the vehicle inspection is only good for 30 days, and 30 days came and went on Wednesday.  Despite my urging for an exception to policy (being as how the vehicle has been parked for the past three weeks) I was given no quarter.  Instead, they gave me a temporary registration and licence plates (for $3.50, U.S. currency only).  Then it I carried my plates back to the embassy annex, finagled a visitor pass, and went in to finally take possession of my 1999 Hyundai Sonata.

My embassy contact handed me the solitary key to the car, I dutifully inserted it into the ignition. turned it, and…nothing.  Yep, the battery was as dead as that ambassador Hillary hung out to dry.  My helpful embassy contact secured me a jump start and then had one of the mechanics install my temporary tags.  And this time I was able to actually drive back to Camp Kim (and the A/C worked perfectly!).  First stop was the AAFES car care center for a new inspection and a $122.00 battery.

Battery installed and inspection passed, I completed the reams of paperwork, and was given two shiny new license plates (for $6.50 U.S.) and told to install them myself.  No big deal I suppose, but that is a service the registration folks used to provide.  And it was hot and I was in slacks and a tie.  Oh well. I got ‘er done and drove back on post just like I knew what I was doing.  Found the car wash ahjussi and he cleaned my new old car up like a champ for a mere W10,000.

I did a little more office work and then Jee Yeun arrived to take me shopping at PX (she buys, I pay).  We had discussed purchasing a new backpack, but after trying a couple on for size I decided I liked the one I’m currently using better.  So I settled for a pair of slacks and a shirt.  Suits me.

Jee Yeun said she was hungry and although I was still stuffed from lunch I drove her (even opened her door like a proper gentleman) to Dragon Hill Lodge for a fancy dinner at Sables.  We had us a live Maine lobster which on the menu was listed as “market price”. That turned out to be a mere $65.00 and included three sides of our choosing.

A huge ass lobster served up with a baked potato, broccoli in cheese sauce, and asparagus in butter,  I was glad we didn't order two lobsters because I was stuffed.

A huge ass lobster served up with a baked potato, broccoli in cheese sauce, and asparagus in butter, I was glad we didn’t order two lobsters because I was stuffed.

My fat and satisfied 60 year old self.

My fat and satisfied 60 year old self.

After dinner we drove over to the commissary and stocked up on all the heavy items we could now easily transport home in the very spacious trunk of my Hyundai.  Then I got to find our way back to Gireum-dong.  The GPS that came with the car is next to worthless, but Jee Yeun did a great job navigating and we made it home in less than a hour, which considering the traffic wasn’t bad at all.

So Hee brought me a birthday cake from Paris Baguette.  A cheesecake which I truly do enjoy.

All decked out with 6 ten year candles...

All decked out with 6 ten year candles…

...which these old lungs managed to blow out with a single gasp.

…which these old lungs managed to blow out with a single gasp.

And that’s pretty much how my day went.  As regular readers know I’ve been a little melancholy upon reaching this milestone.  Glad I did of course, but reflecting on the ever dwindling time I have left has been somewhat disconcerting.  The fact is I still feel young (the aches and pains notwithstanding) so I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m going to embrace that and keep on going as hard and long as I can.

It's a sorry shame is what it is...

It’s a sorry shame is what it is…

Well, I’ve been blessed.  And instead of focusing on the things I no longer have in my life, I’m going to work at being satisfied with the things I do have.  It’s not a bad life I’m living at all and I’m certainly in no hurry to let it go.

Back in college I read Hemingway’s A Clean Well-Lighted Place (full story at the link, it’s short).  It moved me then, but re-reading it tonight from the perspective of an older man gave it a rich new meaning.  A couple of days ago I came across a story (fiction, I think) that also resonated.  Living life in regret will consume you if you let it.  I won’t.

Happy Birthday to me!

Jobs

And I’m not talking about Steve.

Vacation is just about over.  The alarm will ring at 0530 tomorrow morning and I will begin my new old life as a worker bee after a lengthy hiatus as a retiree.  Do I still have what it takes?  I admit it is of some concern since I’ve been out of the game so long.  But I’ll take comfort in the warm embrace of cliches–fish to water, riding a bike, etc.

My impending re-employment has also led me to think about all the other jobs I’ve done in my lifetime.  If memory serves there’s been 25 occupations all told.  Here’s a brief rundown:

1. Paper Boy, Westminster, CA (1967) Hell of a lot of responsibility for a 12 year old.  It was an afternoon paper (plus Sunday mornings), the now long defunct Los Angeles Herald-Examiner, which I delivered from my bicycle 7 days a week.  Had to collect from my customers each month and I was expected to knock on doors to gain new subscriptions as well.  I recall it being a major pain in the ass.

I quit long before the paper did...

I quit long before the paper did…

2. Car wash, Huntington Beach, CA (1971).  A summer job in high school and probably the hardest physical labor I ever performed.  I think the pay was $1.35 an hour. This song came out around the same time:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WwuP7ILX32E

3. Flagman, Huntington Beach, CA (1971).  This was at a motorcycle race track.  When there was a crash I’d wave my flag like a madman to warn other riders.  It was hot, noisy, and dirty work.  I lasted maybe three weeks.

4. Ray-o-Lite, Huntington Beach, CA (1972). You know those reflective lane markers on the highway?  Well, someone has to make them.  I did one summer.  What I remember was falling hard for one of my co-workers who, alas, had a boyfriend.  I finally got her to go out out with me to a CSNY concert.  She was into the music but not into me.  Years later I found myself delivering mail to her house in Anaheim which made me a little sad.

Doing my part to keep America's highways safe.  Because when I was making these I wasn't out driving.

Doing my part to keep America’s highways safe. Because when I was making these I wasn’t out driving.

5. Blinky’s Pizza, Westminster, CA (1972).  The closest I ever got to the fast food industry, but this was a full fledged pizza restaurant.  The job had it’s perks–I’d always take a pie home at the end of my shift and sometimes we’d sneak some beer out too. Whenever I eat out I try very hard to not remember some of the stuff that went on in the kitchen, which even after all these years is still too gross to recount.

6. Pacific Coast Publishing, Garden Grove, CA (1973).  I got to use the skills I developed as the editor of my high school paper putting together church directories for area Seventh Day Adventist (SDA) congregations.  I seduced one of my SDA co-workers out of her virginity which was probably the highlight of my tenure (oh hell, it was definitely the highlight!).  The owner of the business was apparently embezzling money from the church and he killed himself (and my job) when he was exposed.

7. Newspaper delivery, Orange County (1973). So, I got back in the newspaper business, but this time I was feeding those vending racks you see in front of the store.  It meant getting up at 0400 or so seven days a week.  My car at the time was a piece of shit clunker and when it quit so did I.

8. Stop-n-Go Market, Cypress, CA (1973).  Ah, who doesn’t aspire to be a convenience store clerk at least once in their life?  I worked the graveyard shift (11-7) until the night I got robbed at knife point. Decided then that my life was worth more than a couple bucks an hour.

9. Teledyne Cast Products, Pomona, CA (1973).  This was a foundry that made cast aluminum parts for jet aircraft engines.  My job was to monitor the temperature of the molten aluminum so it was just right for pouring.  As you might imagine things got more than a little hot and I was always paranoid that some stoner would spill some on me. Never happened though.  I actually didn’t mind the job, but the foreman wanted to hire his nephew so he fired me.

I wonder if some of the jet engines fan blades are still in service.  I hope not.

I wonder if some of the jet engine fan blades are still in service. I hope not.

10. Adco Plastics, Santa Ana, CA (1974).  Leaving my life in aluminum behind, I entered the realm of vinyl plastic fabrication.  Our main product was the Boat Bath, a device in which rich folk would park their boats so as not to have to clean off algae and other maritime growths (the boat bath would be filled with chlorine or something similar) .  I still have a nasty scar on my finger from an unfortunate accident with one of those razor blade knives.  The memory still makes me cringe.

A Boat Bath.  Park your boat, add some chemicals, and voila!

A Boat Bath. Park your boat, add some chemicals, and voila!

11. Modern Messenger, Orange County (1975). In this job I provided the vehicle (my 1974 Datsun pickup) and the company provided the two way radio.  I’d be dispatched to banks, law offices and the like to pick up important documents and deliver them to their intended recipients.  Sorta like being a mailman without the pay and benefits.

12. Brown’s Distributing, Anaheim, CA (1975). With the birth of my daughter I was looking for some stable work and I found it in route sales.  My company made a product called “Picnic Sandwiches”.  My job was to keep the convenience stores on my route stocked with fresh sandwiches.  There were also incentives for getting new customers, and I proved to be a pretty good salesman.  Go figure.

13.  Letter Carrier, United States Postal Service, Anaheim, CA; Prescott, AZ; Fort Smith, AR (1976-1985).  Ah, the sweet memories I have of my days as a mailman.  Hiking around outdoors, meeting lonely women, and being a union agitator.  Good stuff.

14. Softball Umpire, Prescott, AZ (1981-1983).  I used to be big into softball.  Even founded an organization called “The Mile-High Softball Club” (an intentional double entendre–the elevation of Prescott is 5400 feet).  We sponsored an annual Cinco de Mayo tournament which was a pretty big deal.  The Parks and Recreation Department asked me to join the umpire cadre, it was a paying gig and so I did.  A pretty thankless job, no matter what call you made someone was unhappy.  I remember one player after unsuccessfully arguing that he was safe telling me “ah well, you are still the second best umpire in town”.  I said “oh yeah, who’s best?”  He responded “everyone else is tied for first”.

15. Safety Specialist, United States Postal Service, Fort Smith, AR (1985).  The only real problem with carrying mail was it eventually got mind-numbingly boring after a while.  Also, them Arkansas winters were brutal.  I had met a woman on my mail route who was smart and well-connected and she saw in me some potential I really didn’t see in myself. Anyway, she provided the motivation for me to apply for a management job.  I knew nothing about safety, but the HR Director knew me from our labor-management meetings and I guess she wanted me on her side.  Twelve weeks of training at the USPS Management Academy in Potomac, MD and I actually learned how to do the job.

The training was much more fun than the actual job...

The training was much more fun than the actual job…

16. Labor Relations Representative, United States Postal Service, Columbia, SC (1986-1993).  Once I had made the jump into management I got the urge to use the skills I had acquired as a union steward and branch president.  I figured it was the same collective bargaining agreement, I’d just be approaching it from a different perspective.  So I started applying for every vacancy around.  I finally got interviewed for a job in Charleston, SC. After that interview, one of the panelists said he had a vacancy in Columbia he wanted to talk to me about.  He asked me some technical questions and the only answer I had was “I don’t know, I’ve never done that”.  I figured that was that, but when I got back to my office in Fort Smith there was a message waiting for me that I’d been selected for Columbia.  When I asked my boss later why he’d picked me he said “because you didn’t know anything, you wouldn’t have to unlearn any bad habits.”  True story.

17. Acting Director, Human Resources, USPS, Roanoke, VA (1988).  I guess I was doing pretty well at my job in Columbia because one day I got a call from the big boss asking me to go to Roanoke, VA and clean up a mess.  The HR Director there had been fired for sexually harassing a member of his staff.  When I arrived on the scene I found the staff in complete disarray–half supporting the former director and half supporting the victim.  By the end of my assignment I had everyone pulling in the same direction again and the big boss said “well done”.  It was a good experience and I loved Roanoke.

That's me in Roanoke getting some recognition...

That’s me in Roanoke getting some recognition…

18. Labor Relations Specialist, Mid-Atlantic Area, USPS (1993).  The Postal Service had a major reorganization in 1993, going from five Regional Offices to ten Area Offices.  I scored a labor relations spot on the Mid-Atlantic Area staff.  It was probably the sweetest gig I ever had in my career.  I remained domiciled in Columbia, but I had responsibility for the entire Mid-Atlantic (offices in Philadelphia and Arlington, VA and the states of Maryland, Virginia, Kentucky, West Virginia, and the Carolinas).  So, I was generally on the road three weeks a month (racked up a kazillion air miles with US Air).  And I was basically a hired gun–I’d blow into town and kick the union’s ass in arbitration, then get out of Dodge.  Sweet!

19. Manager, Labor Relations, Mid-Atlantic Area, USPS (1996-2000).  My boss got promoted into a Postal Executive position and he wanted me to fill his old job.  I told him no thanks, I’m loving the job I have now (see above).  One day he called and said “John, I need you to do me a favor”, which was his way of saying he wasn’t asking this time. So, I got promoted and moved to Northern Virginia.  It was a helluva lot of responsibility–six people working for me, three major unions whinging and agitating for the 80,000 employees within my sphere of influence.   Long hours and a long commute, but I never got bored.  I was also selected for the Advanced Leadership Program, which was designed to develop future Postal Executives.  Lots more classroom time at the Management Academy and a Masters program at Marymount University.  Hell, I’m tired just remembering how tired I was during this period.

20. Acting Human Resources Director, Little Rock, AR USPS (2000).  My boss retired and I thought I was in the running for his Postal Executive position.  However, I was deemed “not ready”.  Now, I suspect this was because I had pissed off all the right people at Postal Headquarters (including the guy who eventually became Postmaster General) by not appropriately kowtowing to their superior wisdom and calling bullshit when they dished out bullshit.  Anyway, I realized that I had gone as far as I was gonna go with the USPS, so I started applying for jobs in the federal sector (which paid substantially more than the postal service does).  In the meantime I took an assignment as far away from L’Enfant Plaza as I could find, which happened to be Little Rock.  I actually enjoyed going back to Arkansas where my management career had begun.  I even considered staying permanently.  And then one day I got a phone call.

21. Labor Relations Specialist, U.S. Department of Education, Washington, DC (2001-2005).  I got offered a job as the number two labor guy with ED, an agency with a total of 5000 employees.  It was a GS-14 with maybe a third of my previous responsibility and a $25,000 per year increase.  It was an easy decision to make, and even my commute got better because I could take the train to work rather than spending hours in the nightmare traffic of I-95.  Oh, but the boredom I experienced!  The few issues I dealt with were all so silly and there weren’t that many of them.  The politics were marginally interesting.  The political appointees (Bush Republicans) liked my hard-ass style  and my boss was a go along to get along kind of guy.  So, I’d get the call to attend meetings on the 10th floor which understandably pissed off the guy I worked for.  We managed it, but by my fourth year I was on the verge of going insane.

Everyday on the train ride home I realized just how off the rails my life had gone.

Everyday on the train ride home I realized just how off the rails my life had gone.

22. Human Resources Specialist, 8th U.S. Army, Seoul, Korea (2005-2007).  Things were so bad that I started applying for every vacancy I could find, including Iraq.  The then-wife was certain I had lost my mind, and she was probably right.  Well, Iraq didn’t want me, but Korea did.  I had absolutely no clue about what I was getting into, but I was certain it had to be better than what I was getting out of.  And obviously, I made the right call.  I had two big adjustments to make, learning about Korea and learning the ways of the Army.  Hell, I’d come out of meetings with a list of acronyms to look up.  The Army language was as foreign to me as Korean.  But the work was good and exciting and different.  The Koreans I worked with were outstanding, even the union leaders.  And this job  is where I’ll be going back to the future tomorrow.

23. Deputy Director, Human Resources Management, 8th Army/USFK, Seoul (2007-2008).  My supervisor got cancer and died, and the Director asked me to fill his shoes.Being a Deputy is basically just making sure the staff gives the Director what she wants, when she wants it.  As easy as that may sound there was a learning curve.  A couple of times I had not understood precisely what she required and I’d get blasted with “this is not what I asked for”.  Before too long we got in sync and I came to really enjoy working with her.

My new family in Korea.

My new family in Korea, circa 2007.  About half of them will be there to greet me upon my return tomorrow.

24. Director, Human Resources Management, 8th Army/USFK, Seoul.  When it came time for my boss to return to the USA she encouraged me to apply for the job.  I was a little ambivalent given that I expected to retire in less than two years myself.  Still, I figured I’d rather be the boss than work for a bad one, and I wound up getting the job.  I actually enjoyed my time as Director.  Given that I knew I was going to retire I had a certain freedom to “speak truth to power” and somewhat surprisingly, the brass seemed to appreciate my honesty.  Most of the time anyway.  Anyway, it was a great way to finish what I assumed was going to be the end of my career.  Obviously, things change.

Everybody's so different, I haven't changed...

Everybody’s so different, I haven’t changed…

25. Admin support, MES, Seoul, Korea.  When I retired on December 31, 2010 I figured my working life was over.  The plan was to spend six months in the USA and six months in Korea.  After doing that for 4 years, Jee Yeun balked at returning to the states.  I decided I’d rather be with her here than without her back home.  To facilitate my return I started beating the bushes for a job.  It’s easier to have a SOFA visa and base access than it is to be without it.  So, I briefly became a Wal-Mart greeter of sorts at the K-16 Airbase Multi-use Learning Facility.  The job was as boring as it sounds and the pay wouldn’t cover my month bar tab.  But it got me back here, and for that I am grateful.

The misspelling of my name was emblematic of my "career" with MES.

The misspelling of my name was emblematic of my “career” with MES.

And now the circle is complete.

 

 

 

It’s better to be lucky than good

My older brother posted the picture below on Facebook today.  I actually recall that day.  I was four and couldn’t swim.  Call the raft rickety is an insult to the word rickety.  I was scared shitless.

I also routinely rode in the back of open pickup trucks, played outside all day long without adult supervision, rode my bke without a helmet, etc. etc.   And yet I live.

I also routinely rode in the back of open pickup trucks, played outside all day long without adult supervision, rode my bke without a helmet, etc. etc. And yet I live.

 

Welp, it could always be worse

They made me wear those funky shorts for the x-ray.  30 minutes in the crowded waiting room was pretty humiliating.  The peels of Jee Yeun's laughter didn't help much either...

They made me wear those funky shorts for the x-ray. 30 minutes in the crowded waiting room was pretty humiliating. The peels of Jee Yeun’s laughter didn’t help much either…

I told the hilarious Dr. Yu about the leg pain I’ve been living with, described it’s onset and duration, and my fear it might be vascular.  He gave me a quick examination and then discounted the possibility of a clogged artery, saying the pain intervals were inconsistent with that diagnosis.  He thought it more likely it was muscular or a nerve problem.  So, he ordered up a blood test to check for elevated “CPK” and an x-ray of my lower spine.

My office visit with Dr. Yu was interrupted by a radio interview he conducted regarding the MERS outbreak here in Korea. He said he was going to try and tamp down the panic that has ensued as the result of two Koreans dying from the disease.  His view is that while MERS is serious, the potential for an epidemic is low and with proper medical care the fatality rate could be minimized.  Let’s hope he’s right about that.  And my leg.

So I gave the blood, got the x-ray, and reported back to Dr. Yu. He put the x-ray up on his monitor and declared my spine “a miracle”.  I confirmed that by miracle he meant no issues, and indeed that was his meaning.  He said my CPK level was slightly elevated (10-120 being normal, mine was 160) which confirmed to him that my problem is indeed muscular.

Well, he’s the doctor so who am I to argue.  I just don’t understand why it’s not getting any better, in fact, it’s a little worse, after three months.  So, he gave me a prescription for a muscle relaxer and told me to soak in the tub for 10 minutes every night before bed.  And I guess that’s what I’ll do.  I wish I wasn’t such a pussy when it comes to pain, otherwise I’d just walk it off.

But by god, I’m still alive.  Which makes me luckier than my two friends in Columbia. As much as I love irony, I sincerely hope those don’t prove to be my famous last words.

And now for some good news

 

Speaking of the old job, I submitted my formal resignation yesterday effective next Monday.  The boss asked if I was really sure this time because he wouldn’t entertain another round of “never minds”.  I told him yes, this time I really, really mean it.  Truth is, he has a woman ready, willing, and able to take the reins at K-16 who has been patiently waiting for me to get out of the way.  If there is any delay in starting my new job I’ll just have to deal with the inconvenience of losing base access in the interim.  Time to move on.

In other news, I got up early this morning and journeyed out to Hannam-dong for my appointment with the hilarious Dr. Yu.  I told him about my persistent cough/sore throat. He listened to my chest and said “it’s not pneumonia” (which apparently is going around). I told him I was more concerned about cancer.  He pooh-poohed this notion, but told me he’d send me for a chest and sinus x-ray to alleviate my worries.  Actually what he said was “so your worries will fly away” while flapping his arms like wings.  Told you he was hilarious.

So, the x-rays come back and it turns out I have sinusitis.  And my lungs are clear, other than some mucous.  Looks like I dodged the cancer bullet again.  Woot!

Came away with some new additions to my daily pill regimen. It seems like I'm becoming my parents. And things didn't end well for them. Although, if I make it as far as they did I'll have no complaints.

Came away with some new additions to my daily pill regimen. It seems like I’m becoming my parents. And things didn’t end well for them. Although, if I make it as far as they did I’ll have no complaints.

Dr. Yu sent me on my way with his standard entreaty to drink more water.  I told him I drink plenty of OB (my preferred Korean beer).  He agreed that OB “is mostly water”. Hilarious.

 

Coffin

It looks like I’ve quit smoking again.  Apparently.  As I’ve been known to say, quitting is easy, it’s the not starting again that’s the hard part.

What’s odd about this time is that I had no specific plan to give up cigarettes.  No psyching myself up with a target date, no drugs or stop smoking aids, and no more than the usual admonishments of the wife.  I didn’t make the decision to quit, my body did.

Saturday night I had a really bad coughing fit.  I went out Sunday morning for a smoke and it just didn’t taste good.  I tried again in the afternoon, got halfway through, and it was just yuck, so I put it out.  And I haven’t smoked since.  Now, I was a 20+ cigarette (sometimes twice that) so this has been a pretty significant break.  It’s not to say I don’t get the urge, but those urges are based on habits (like being bored at work or writing a blog post like this one) not a craving for nicotine.  I guess my body has just had enough.

Now the question is did I wait too long.  The cough is persistent and coming from somewhere deep in my chest.  The coughing fits are sometimes painful.  And my throat is sore.  So, I’m going to try and get an appointment with the hilarious Dr. Yu.  I’d like a chest x-ray and whatever other tests they might run to see if I’m dying.  I just read about some minor celebrity (who’s name I’ve already forgotten) who had a persistent cough, was diagnosed with esophagus cancer, and was dead within thirty days.  I’d like to avoid that fate of course, but if my time is up there are many things I need to take care of.  I’d rather know than not.

I also want to know what’s up with the intermittent pain in my left leg.  And now the arch of my right foot is also a source of pain.  I could barely stumble to the bathroom this morning.  I mean, I’m old, but not this old.  Yet.

Back to the future

I got the call today!

Yes, I will soon be back to where I started just over ten years ago.  My former organization called today with a job offer for a GS-13 Human Resources Specialist position–the job I took when I first journeyed to Korea.  I’ll be doing the type of work I did for most of my pre-retirement career and I’m pretty damned excited about it.  Not to mention I’ll actually be earning a living wage.

Of course, the downside is I’ll be working a full-time, 8-5 type gig again with all the stress and associated headaches that come with it.  Hopefully my work skills have not atrophied much during my four year hiatus from being a working man.  Whatever the case, I will *ahem* work through it.

For the record, I never thought I would be one of those guys who retire and then comes crawling back looking for a job. .  My plan was to spend 6 months in the USA and six months in Korea and live relatively happy ever after.  Plans change.  Turns out the wife wasn’t happy in the states and I wasn’t happy without her being there.  With my being back in Korea on a more or less permanent basis I may as well fill my days with gainful employment, right?

So as lucrative as this new old job will be (I’ll be making more than four times my current hourly wage) it is not quite as sweet as what I left behind when I retired.  Because I’m being hired “locally” from a position that doesn’t include a housing allowance I’m not eligible for one here.  Which means I won’t be moving into a big ass fancy apartment close to work like I used to enjoy.  I also won’t be getting my shit shipped over from the states.  Ah well, I have most of what I need and I’ve gotten acclimated to the commute from Giruem.  I will have to go out and purchase some appropriate work attire (slacks, shirts and ties, and maybe a suit or two).

I felt bad calling my current boss with the news.  He just got back from his sister’s funeral so it felt like piling on.  I certainly appreciated his getting me back to Korea when I really had no other viable options.  For what it’s worth, I did ask my new old organization to let me start mid-April so that I might give a reasonable notice of my departure and they agreed.

Yesterday I was finally granted access to the computer network which I should have known was a sign that I’d be departing soon.  Hopefully the transition to my new old job will go much smoother than what I’ve experienced these past few months.

Whatever.  I’m back in the game baby!

Losing it

I’m not the type of person who loses things.  I’ve never left my darts in a cab, my bag on the subway, or my wallet on the floor as have so many of my expat counterparts. Recently however I’ve apparently grown sloppy.

It started when I misplaced my office key.  Luckily, I had dropped it on the floor after locking the door and it was returned to me the following work day (after I had gone through the trouble and expense of getting a duplicate made).  Then a couple of weeks ago I left my credit card on the bar in Shenanigans.  Fortunately the bar owner found it and sent me a text message before I even knew it was gone.  And then yesterday I was feeling the need to listen to some music on the bus ride to work so I reached into my backpack for my iPod. Gone.  I figure I dropped while retrieving my darts from said backpack on Monday night. That means I lost it at either Shenanigans, Dillinger’s or Sin Bin (hey, I get around). Hopefully it will turn up as I had over 17,000 songs on that sucker.

I always figured my body would give out long before I lost my mind.  Now it appears to be a race to the finish.  Alas.

The Facebook of blogging

Blogging is dead.  Long live blogging!

Rumor has it that blogs have become passe, and new-fangled formats like Twitter and Facebook are where all the cool kids share their thoughts and musings with the world. Although I keep up with friends and family on Facebook (and sometimes impart pearls of wisdom there), rest assured I save my “best” for my loyal readers here at LTG.  Ha! You’ve no doubt never heard “best” used in that context before.  To which I can only say “shut up!”

But things do change of course.  As I’ve delved through the archives of my blogging history I’ve noticed that I moved away from writing about politics and evolved into more of an autobiographical mode.  Hell, I’ll call this blog what it is–a personal diary.  Which of course holds little interest to the world at large, but I’m a subject matter expert on the fascinating topic of me.  So I reckon I’ll just keep on keeping on until I’m not.

I like what James Lileks had to say about the so-called death of blogging:

If blogs are dying I suppose I shall go with them, he said, using “shall” to put you in mind of someone tossing a scarf over his shoulder and facing the bracing wind. There’s been a few stories here and there about the expiration of the form, occasioned perhaps by Andrew Sullivan stepping away, and noting how everything is going Social and Sharable.

Am I worried about time and trends passing me by? Not at all. This has always been just what it is since the very first entry, and while it’s expanded in length and subject, I am not going to convert it to a series of sharable snacks for Facebook feeds. Perhaps that’s unwise. But I hate Facebook and have no desire to spend any time there, so tailoring the Bleat or lileks.com for Zuckerberg’s dull blue borg cube would be like spending a lot of time and money getting fitted for clothes I don’t like so I can blend in amongst people I don’t know in a country I don’t like.

Anyway: it worries me a little that “blogs are dying,” because if so we lose the idea of a place where people speak their piece, as oppose to speak in pieces.

While most blogs weren’t deathless examples of great writing, there was the opportunity for individualism, and you don’t get that from a Pinterest page. You don’t get it from a feed of things snipped and reblogged and pinned and shoveled into The Feed. The web turns into bushels of confetti shoveled into a jet engine, and while something does emerge out the other end, it’s usually made impressive by its velocity and volume, not the shape it makes.

Now, I don’t Twitter but I do on occasion read Tweets.  Usually on Twitchy or on Kevin Kim’s sidebar. And I don’t hate Facebook, but quite a few folks do.  I find it to be a useful tool for staying in touch with far flung friends.  If you are not my “friend” on Facebook, look at what you’ve missed this week:

I don’t recall ever recovering from a nine mark. Until tonight. 3-0 in cricket singles.

Back to normal after the holidays, standing room only on the subway. A seat came open in front of me, but I offered it to the woman standing beside me. A couple of stops later the seat next to her opened up but as I was in the process of sitting down the train jerked throwing me off balance and I wound up stepping directly on her foot. I apologized profusely but if looks could kill I would not be here to write this post. I’m not sure there is a moral to this story but it wasn’t the greatest start to the day. I guess for either of us.

As usual, Mark Steyn nails it.

Thank you Canada!

Mission accomplished! (if you only click one link, this is the one. Hilarious!)

Be careful out there guys.

So, the State Department asked for ideas on how to counter “violent extremism” by adherents of a religion that must not be named. Senator Tom Cotton’s response was beautiful. (Heh, I just realized that I found this link on Twitter, shared it on Facebook, and have now posted it on the blog.  Fusion baby!

Anyway, you get the idea.  It has been written  that “to every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven”.  This time for blogging has come to an end because it is my purpose to now eat lunch!

Yep, Jee Yeun has prepared me one of her internationally famous "egga burgers"!

Yep, Jee Yeun has prepared me one of her internationally famous “egga burgers”!

 

 

For all these years

(In celebration of ten years of blogging here at LTG, each week for the next 52 51 50 weeks I will delve deep into the sewer archives of past posts to bring you a tidbit of blog history.  I had originally planned to call this series “The best of LTG”, but damn, there just wasn’t much “best” to be found.  And mediocre is too hard to spell.)

On January 1, 2005 I found myself thinking (and blogging) about my life in Oklahoma in a post called “Journey through the past”.  Ten years later I’m thinking the more things change, the more they remain the same.

And that I guess leads to my current insight on this New Years morning. I never really had a plan for life, I just reacted to it. Whenever I reached a crossroad, I chose a direction and followed the road without a clue as to where it might take me. I guess it is natural to wonder about the paths that would have led to a different life, but you only get to live the life you chose. No mulligans. But I have been extremely fortunate and blessed. Good people got hurt along the way, and for that I am truly sorry. But the roads I have taken have led to some great adventures and life-altering experiences. A fool’s luck perhaps, but even though I could never have imagined what my life would turn out to be, it has been a very nice ride.

So it is time to look forward again. This year brings a new road in Seoul, Korea. And it will be an adventure with an uncertain outcome for sure. My point (if there is one) is just to say I have discovered that it is important to take the time to enjoy the life you are living even as you chase rainbows. I think I missed the best part of Oklahoma and it is only in looking back that I realize that I should have allowed myself to be happy there.

 

 

The last dance

We danced to the song we always do as a duet at the norebang--"It's the end of the world"....

We danced to the song we always do as a duet at the norebang–“It’s the end of the world”….

On Christmas morning Jee Yeun told me she was unhappy in our marriage.  I asked her if she was willing to work on making things better.  She told me “no, not really”.

For the next few days things seemed fine and I was thinking maybe she had reconsidered. But on Tuesday she said “I’ll help you find an apartment in Itaewon if you want”.  I asked her what her plans were and she said she wants to move to the “countryside”.*  Apparently, she already has a house in mind there.

It’s all very surreal.  She professes to still love me and I believe her.  I think she knows how much I truly love her as well.  She just wants a different life and in her pragmatic way she has chosen to pursue it without me.

She told me she wanted to be with me for New Year’s Eve last night.  And so for the first time in several months she joined me in Itaewon at Dolce Vita Pub.  We had spent many happy nights there during our courtship.

The picture in this picture was taking six years ago or so...

The picture in this picture was taken six years ago or so…

It was an enjoyable, but bittersweet, evening.  I just can’t imagine what my life is going to be without her in it.  And I have a good imagination.

* “countryside” means somewhere some three hours south near where her Aunt lives.  Jee Yeun says she’s happy there.

Bummin’

It’s been cold.  And I’ve come down with one as well.  My efforts at dressing to keep warm met with derision from Jee Yeun.  She suggested I take a can and sit outside for awhile.  Hell, I’d probably make as much that way as I’m earning at the new job.  ‘

Which reminds me, after my first day of work yesterday I rewarded myself with a couple of hours of beer drinking in Itaewon.  Now, my motives were pure–I simply wanted to let the rush hour subway crowds dissipate a tad before I ventured home.  When I did make it back to Gireum, Jee Yeun accused me of spending my entire day’s wages at the bar.  She was only half-right.

Brother, can you spare a dime?

Brother, can you spare a dime?

 

Hi-ho, hi-ho…

…it’s off to work I go!  It’s been four years since I’ve been paid for my time but hopefully I’ll remember how to “git-er-done”.

I’m up early this morning.  I intend to catch the subway from Gireum to Samgakji station at 0600.  That’ll leave me a ten minute or so walk to the on-base post office where I’m scheduled to meet my co-worker (also a John) at 0700.  We will then walk the block over to the bus station to catch the military shuttle going to K-16 Air Base in Seongnam.  In all the years I previously worked in Korea I never had occasion to visit K-16.  It’s been called the “most insignificant military base in Korea”.  Since I’m probably the most insignificant employee in Korea, it ought to be a good fit.

I’m still a little fuzzy on what my precise duties will be.  I think I’m supposed to keep track of the folks who come to use our computer lab.  That task will be made a little more difficult as I won’t have access to the database used for that purpose today or for the near future. There was a little hiccup with my security clearance.  Although my past clearance had been “archived”, when it was resurrected all my pertinent data was missing.  Which means I need to complete a raft of documents, get fingerprinted, and have my background investigated.  The security office is going to try and have that process started by Monday. Until it’s done there is not much I can do on the USFK computer network.  Well, co-worker John is going to be there today to show me the ropes and I guess we’ll devise a work around.

Anyhoo, it should be interesting.  Especially when my body tells me it’s nap time this afternoon.  Ah well, one of the sacrifices a working man must make, right?

 

 

Ten years after

10 years!

Still crazy after all these years…

One long ago winter’s day in Stafford, Virginia I sat down and crafted the first ever post here at Long Time Gone.   Looking back from the perspective of half a score of years, I can’t help but cringe a little at the naivete and cluelessness of the person I was back then.

I’m moving to Seoul, Korea. Although the general consensus among family and friends is that I’ve lost my mind (which I don’t necessarily deny), this is something of a calling for me.

I went on and on about duty and honor and serving those who served, which was perhaps the truth on some level, but as is usually the case with me, my motivations were at their core driven by my own selfishness.

I have lived a very comfortable life. Too comfortable perhaps. The chance to live and work overseas in a totally alien culture seems to be an exciting opportunity to get out of my box and experience a new lifestyle.

Now, what I meant to say here is that I hate my fucking white bread suburban life, I’m bored and miserable, and if I don’t find a way to get out of here I’m going to go batshit crazy. Although I guess maybe you can read that between the lines.

I have made a two-year commitment to the Army, and if I am miserable and lost and lonely, well I will deal with it and learn what I can from the experience. Going in, I have a positive attitude and believe that I have the power to determine what I gain and how I grow as I live this new life.

Oh my, but I was full of myself back then, wasn’t I?  That two years became six and carried me right up to retirement.  I did in fact find myself more than occasionally “miserable, lost and lonely”, as often as not from the sometimes cruel hearts of Korean women.  For example, a Korean woman I dated for almost two years broke up with me via email.  While we were living together!  Still, the good times outweighed the bad and in my ignorance I came to love Korea, even if I didn’t (and don’t) always understand her.  It is pretty funny that I actually believed I had the “power” to determine what I gained from the experience.  I still feel the pain of the things I lost by being here over the years.  What have I gained?  Well, I get to be the person I have become.  And I like that better than the person I was.

So, this blog will serve as a diary of my life in Korea. It will be a place where I share my thoughts on what I am seeing, doing, and learning.

I guess I got that part right.  Mostly.

I’m going to cut that guy from tens years ago a little slack though.  He wasn’t happy with his life and so he changed it.  There was a price to be paid for that, but I think it was worth it in the end.  And ten years later finds that guy back in Korea still pursuing his happiness. Hope springs eternal.

“Though half a score of years are gone,
Spring comes as sharply now as then—
But if we had it all to do
It would be done the same again.

It was a spring that never came;
But we have lived enough to know
That what we never have, remains;
It is the things we have that go.”

–Sara Teasdale