So, in keeping with the theme of my working life, here’s a photo of my coworkers (well, the picture was taken on October 11, so my coworkers at that time).

My new family in Korea.

L-R Front Row: Corine Rodriguez; Kim, Yong-im; Yi, Kyong-ae; Sharon Alsop; Yi, Yong-in; So, Chong Cho; Yi, Tok Hui; Joel Springer
L-R Back Row: Choe, Song Won; Donna Cole; Kim, Yong-tae; Me; Bill Dyer; Leora Andersen; Bosong Mayer. (not pictured: Walt Washington)

Handsome group, eh? You can see our cool shed that serves as office space in the background.

So, since October 11 here’s what changed: Walt died. Corine left for a job in DC. Joel left for a promotion in HR at Installation Management Command-Korea. Donna has accepted a lateral assignment at the Civilian Personnel Advisory Center (CPAC) in Yongsan (although we are not releasing her until we have a replacement selected). Leora also took a job at the CPAC and left last week. Bosong took a job at the U.S. Embassy and leaves after next week.

As you might imagine, things are pretty f’d up at work right now. We are at 33% of our (already lean) U.S. staffing authorization. At this point we are just trying to avoid a critical mission failure, but my stress level is way up there. We will get through this. I’ve actually found replacements for Bosong, Joel, and Corine, although they won’t come on board until late January. Just got to suck it up until then.

You know, I don’t fault people for doing what they need to do to advance their careers. In a way, it’s a compliment when your people get promoted. Donna to her credit has been a real trooper in delaying her departure pending getting some new staff on board. I’m extremely disappointed in one individual that I consider selfish and disloyal. Everyone is replaceable though. And you burn bridges at your own peril. ‘Nuff said about that.

So that should bring y’all up to speed on my working life. Far be it from me to complain…

Well, it doesn’t really matter because not much has changed here since my last post way back in August. Well, the leaves have changed because summer is long gone and autumn is in her death throes. It’s actually been quite beautiful, I love the yellow and red leaves blowing about the city streets like confetti. Bleah, my writing has not much improved has it?

Anyway, I’m not going to try and catch you up on everything in one fell swoop. First, it would be boring as hell. And second, after my long hiatus I expect I’m down to literally one or two faithful readers and they probably can guess what’s been up. But thanks Jenn and Susan and Nomad for checking up on me. I actually had a couple of other acquaintances ask what happened to my blog and expressed some remorse that I was not posting. As did my mother. So, I may never have had many readers, but damn those few of you are loyal. I did miss my little blog more than I would have imagined and I am resolved to post with some semblance of regularity now that I have her back. I know, promises, promises.

For those curious about why my account was suspended so long I’ll share that story. Even though it makes me look stupid. It was really all just a misunderstanding. Here’s how it went down:

Way back when (late August, early September) I happened to check my credit card statement. I only do so periodically as I am lazy and disorganized. And it is actually not a credit card, it is the debit card for my checking account. So, I see this charge to “West Bend Web” for $172.80. And by God, I never even heard of West Bend Web and I damn sure didn’t make a purchase from them through PayPal.

So, I marched on down to my bank (which is actually a credit union) and in my outrage filed a dispute and canceled my debit card since someone had obviously stolen the number somehow.
About a week later I get a letter from the credit union saying they had notified PayPal of the dispute and had provisionally credited my account in the amount of $172.80. Ok, so far so good.

A couple of days later my blog was suspended. What’s up with that? I went to the help page at Blogs-about.com (my blog host) and initiated a claim ticket. I started this blog in December 2004 so I figured I was paid up until December (I pay annually) and besides, I had never gotten a bill. It took several days for Blogs-about to get back to me with the news that PayPal had rescinded my payment in the amount of $172.80. Oops!

Turns out, I had been on a month-to-month basis until August 2005, and then switched over to the annual payment. Not that I remembered doing that. And it also seems that I set this up as an automatic payment, which is why I never got a bill. Well. Geez. So, I’m stupid, ok?

And then began the nightmare of trying to reverse the events my ignorance had set in motion. First, I went back to the credit union and said “my bad, West Bend Web is the name Blogs-about uses for billing (no, I don’t know why, but that’s what caused the confusion) so, please withdraw the dispute.” A few days later I get the letter confirming that the dispute was withdrawn and advising that the $172.80 credit was being reversed. Ok. So, I figure PayPal would remit the money to West Bend and I would be back in business. Nope.

After waiting a few days, I went back to Blogs-about and asked what was going on. They said PayPal had not remitted the funds and I should contact them for the status. Trust me, if you have never navigated the Byzantine world that is PayPal consider yourself fortunate.

Since I had made a disputed payment claim, they had blocked my account. To reinstate my account. I had to jump through several hoops. One of which involved FAXing my credit card statement. Except I had canceled that account. The other involved FAXing a utility bill from the address on my account, which is in Virginia. And as most of you know, I live in Korea these days. And oh yeah, PayPal has no record of the $172.80 being remitted by my bank.

So, I found a phone number for the PayPal folks and actually talked to a real live human being. I explained the situation in detail and the kind female voice on the other end of the line was very understanding and promised to see what she could do.

A couple of days later I received an email from PayPal explaining in step-by-step detail what I needed to do to reinstate the the account. And yes, it involved a credit card statement for an account that no longer exists and a utility bill from a place I no longer reside. And no mention whatsoever of the $172.80 that was withdrawn from my account. Hmm.

So, I emailed the woman at the credit union (in San Diego) who had handled my initial dispute and got an “out of office” reply indicating she was no longer employed there. I then emailed the contact address at the credit union explaining the situation and got a form letter reply with a dispute form attached. Yeah, that worked out well for me last time!

So. I decided to try and work an end-around. I registered for a new PayPal account (which required me to use a new email address (only one account per email address apparently). To establish a new account PayPal bills your credit card $1.95. When that charge appears on your statement there is a four-digit number. Then you send that number to PayPal and you are verified and can make purchases. This took about a week.

So, with my new account in hand I paid for a new subscription at Blogs-about. And waited. And waited. And wrote the help desk. And wrote the help desk again. And then in the wee dark hours of last night, my blog as if by magic reappeared.

Meanwhile, I have no idea where the $172.80 currently resides. I’m wondering if the woman at the credit union took it with her. Assuming PayPal has the money, it will be placed in the account I can no longer use because I can’t verify I am who I say I am.

So, after all this hassle all I’ve got to show is a blog I’ve paid twice for and this crappy post. Well, I’m not done fighting to get this resolved but I’m pretty much exhausted at this point and lord knows what havoc I will wreak by filing a new dispute with the credit union. Stay tuned for more of my exciting life.

Ok, I also need to bring you up to speed on my dart life and happenings at the office. But we will save those posts for another day. I have my Korean lesson tonight and I have not studied since the last one. I’m learning verbs these days which I think may be a key ingredient to me speaking in actual sentences someday. I have an amazing vocabulary consisting of fruits, animals, seasons, body parts and the like, but practically speaking, it’s not much help in conversation with the natives. Although one night when a Korean guy called me a hippo I said “do you mean hama?”. He was quite impressed with my grasp of the language. Well, hell, I can order beer and ask where the bathroom is in Korean. Really, what else do you need to know?

I’m not talking about tomato paste either. It’s been awhile since I’ve posted, so I guess it’s time to play some catch up. Not that much has been happening mind you, but what the hell, that’s never stopped me before.

Last Friday I had some good darts at the Dolce Vita tournament. Two firsts and a second. Was feelin’ a pretty good beer high when I left, then stopped at a soju tent on the way home. A soju drunk on top of the beer was not the smartest idea I’ve had in awhile. Anyhow, got to talking with a couple of the trannies from a nearby tranny bar who were sitting there, which is always kinda interesting. I’ve seen some good looking lady boys on the street, but these “girls” would never be mistaken for anything other than men in drag. Don’t actually remember what we talked about, but I must have bought a lot of soju because I spent W60,000 which was equal to my darts winnings. Ah well, cruised on home about 0500.

I woke up Saturday a little after one, which would have been ok except I had to meet Grant, Rick and Lonnie at the Itaewon subway station at two. Grant is getting married on 1 September and the plan was to head on down to Songtan for a bachelor party. Well, I rushed around and made it, then we subwayed to Nambu bus terminal for the ride down to Songtan, arriving about 4:00.

Surprisingly, after 2 and half years in Korea this was my first trip down there. For those who don’t know, Songtan is the village right outside Osan Air Base. Which means there are lots of bars, shops, and other entertainment that caters primarily to a military clientèle. Kinda like Itaewon on speed.

So, the first thing Grant says is let’s get our hotel rooms. I said, excuse me, no one said anything to me about spending the night. Call me old fashioned but when I do an overnighter I like to carry a change of clothes and a toothbrush. Rick and Lonnie said they hadn’t decided whether they were spending the night yet, so we kinda just let it slide. So we hit the dart supply shop and stocked up some dart paraphernalia. Then we decided to eat. I was thinking a good burger would hit the spot, but the other guys wanted Thai. Just what my stomach needed after a night of soju. I got some seafood noodles at spice level 2 (out of 5) and they went down ok.

Notwithstanding my hangover we decided it was time to drink some beer and play some darts. So, we did a bit of bar crawling and there were quite a few dart bars along the way. There is a dart tourney in Songtan every Saturday night and I was up for playing, but Rick and Lonnie had other ideas. So, we put away the darts and switched to the entertainment bars. I can’t recall the names of most of them, but I do know the first one we tried wouldn’t seat us because the other guys were carrying backpacks (yeah, they brought a change of clothes). So we wound up at a place called UN Club.

Ok, it was a juicy bar. And in between buying W10,000 juice drinks, the girls would do a pole dance on stage. Sexy outfits but no exposed breasts or anything like that. Now, those girls shore were friendly and being that it was a bachelor party and all we let them entertain us for awhile (in exchange for us buying them drinks of course. The girl sitting beside me was covered in tattoos which is kinda of a turn off, but since I was not looking for love in all the wrong places it didn’t matter much. An unnamed guy (hey there is honor among thieves) and the girl he was sitting with were really getting along in an up close and personal kinda way however. After a couple of hours we were ready to move on and being as how there weren’t many other suckers, I mean customers, around they were probably sincerely sorry to see us go. Once we got outside, Grant brought up the hotel room thing again. By now Rick and Lonnie had decided to stay and the unnamed one was wanting to get to “know” the girl from UN Club, so he got a room too. I had no intention of staying and knowing I had to find my way back on my own dampened my spirits a bit.

But being the good trooper that I am, I decided to hang awhile anyway. So, we stopped at Mickey D’s for the burger I was craving then moved on to some “go go” bars. These basically featured cute (mostly) young Filipinas dancing on stage in mini-skirts. Guess I’m getting old, but it just didn’t do much for me. One young dancer (couldn’t have been more than 19) wanted to sit with me after her dance, but I sent her away to Rick instead. Just wasn’t in the mood for that kind of company.

So about midnight the guys decided they were ready for a return visit to UN Club. Which is when I said my goodbyes. I was as drunk as I wanted to be and unlike them, I still had to make it home. So, I found my way back to the bus station, and of course it was closed. So, I hailed a cab and asked if he wanted to take me to Itaewon. The cabbie agreed and we were off. Of course, after midnight taxi fares are higher but I was surprised at just how fast the meter was rolling off the Won. I checked my wallet and found W73,000, so I crossed my fingers that I would have enough for the trip. As fate would have it, when we he pulled up to my door 40 minutes later the fare came to W71,000. So, I gave him the W73,000, said kamsamnida, and headed upstairs. Yeah, I could have gotten a room for less than the cab fare, but I was glad to be home.

And on Sunday I rested (hey, it worked for the Lord). Watched a good movie called “The Departed”.

Monday was dart league. We played one of the weaker teams in our division, T.A.P. from 3 Alley Pub. We took them down 14-5, which is even more impressive than it sounds because our best player Cuatro was not available due to the military exercise. I went 6-0 with a few marks which will hopefully move me up from my embarrassing 14th place ranking.

I also found out Monday that my star employee Corine has accepted a job in Washington, DC. She is leaving at the worst possible time, but I can’t fault her as it is a big promotion. So, I am happy for her but pretty bummed to be losing her. She has been like a big sister to me and I am going to really miss her friendship as well as her stellar job performance. Anyway, I’ll say more about her later, I am really not wanting to think about it much now. She is here until 15 October, but I won’t be able to get a replacement on board before she leaves. My only other US employee (the one who had twins) is leaving next Friday. So, I’m pretty much fucked work wise, but that’s life.

Tuesday was my 3rd week of Korean lessons from my tutor. I have to give her credit, she does a lot of preparation for me. Makes little games so I can practice what she has taught me. Although it makes me feel like I’m in kindergarten, which is probably about the right assessment of my current skill level. Still, I am reading better and she says my pronunciation is good. At this point I am just building vocabulary, I am a long way from conversation. I’m enjoying doing the reciprocal English lessons I’m providing, although I don’t work near as hard at it as she does. She says it is helping and she seems appreciative, so I’m glad for that. I need to have her and her husband over for dinner one of these days. I’ve met him a couple of times now. He is a Korean rapper, apparently of some local fame (at least he has a weekend radio show). His stage name is “Rapatizer”, but I’ve never heard him perform. He dresses kinda urban and has a big afro which is a little peculiar looking on a Korean guy. Tells me he is going to get some corn rows soon. Ok, then.

Last night I got asked to pinch hit for a missing player on the Dolce Vita pool league team. I haven’t even picked up a pool stick for months. So, I had low expectations going in and I managed to achieve them. Well, I won one game when my opponent scratched on the 8-ball. Still, I guess that was better than a forfeit.

And so that brings us up to the moment. Glad we had this chance to catsup.

Well, more accurately an ass kicking. The Blessed Bulls from Bless U Pub took us down last night 12-7. My game was definitely off and I was lucky to escape with 2 legs won (losing 4). Ah well, nothing to do but keep plugging away.

Congrats to Craig and the boys on a well played match.

UPDATE: In the comments Nomad points out this excellent post from the Party Pooper which provides a very in depth discussion on the “virtues” of a dog meat diet. He even has pictures which may be more than most dog lovers can stomach (heh, a double entendre and pun at once). Here’s a PETA add I lifted from PP. As he notes, this may have not been the most effective anti-meat ad here in Korea.

The Nomad has an interesting post today concerning the alleged nutritional benefits of man’s best friend. Apparently the Western mind and modern science is incapable of comprehending these “facts”. Well, I do admit that I can’t grasp the concept of drinking dog penis wine even if it were proven to be a magic elixir of youth. I will continue to cure what ails me with kimchee, thank you very much.

It’s the time of the season again. Soldiers rotating out after completing their tour of duty in Korea. A good thing for them of course, but it also means saying goodbye to friends.

This time we bid farewell to Mario. A great guy who always wears a big shit eatin’ grin on his face and is quick to laugh and offer words of encouragement. He joined our dart team last year and really contributed to our successful season. Just an all around great guy who kept us loose and always found a way to keep it fun. He is missed already.

Anyway, we did his going away gig at Dolce Vita Thursday night. Lots of food and beer and a dart tournament called “Last Chance to Beat Mario”. I wound up playing against Mario and his partner. I admit to being somewhat conflicted because while it would be nice for Mario to take first in the tourney held in his honor, I only play darts one way–to win. So, we took the first leg in cricket, and they came back to take the ’01 leg. We jumped out to an early lead in the third cricket leg, but then Mario threw a 7-mark on 15s for points. Damn dude. We got beat fair and square and Mario wound up taking the championship match. And I got W5000 for 3rd. Perfect ending!

Mario’s next duty station is in Hawaii so don’t feel too sorry for him. Here’s some pictures from Thursday night:

Mario in action. Should have blinded him BEFORE that 7-mark!

Mario and Se Hwa.

Food, beer, and darts. Does it get any better than this?

Mario’s friend and teammate Lonnie.

Jun from Bless U Pub.

Me and my partner Mac. We gave Mario a good game, but in the end he was just too good for us.

Petro, the dart league president and a Korean guy I’ve never seen before.

Mario holding court. I think these are some of his Hash friends.

Jim, Dolce owner, teammate, and host of the event. Dolce kicked in W100,000 to sweeten the tourney pot.

Mario modeling our new dart league Jersey. Pretty cool, huh? Lonnie did the graphic design.

Bill and Joon. Got an invite to their wedding in October.

Mario with his share of the winnings from the tourney victory. Good luck spending that Won in Hawaii dude!

So, that’s the report on Mario’s big night. Dolce is going to be a lot quieter without you and here’s hoping our paths cross again one day…

Nothing reminds me more about how out of touch with American culture I’ve become than when I look at the movies being sold by the street vendors in Itaewon. I swear, I’ve never heard anything about 90% of the offerings. So, it is always a hit and miss affair when I make a purchase. Most of the time I miss. Got lucky last year when I bought “Crash” (well before the Oscar nomination). And I just watched another good one called “Stranger than Fiction”. I wanted to buy “The Simpson’s” but it was sold out, so I picked up STF only because I recognized most of the actors in the film. Will Farrell, Dustin Hoffman, and Emma Thompson were all excellent in a story that was quite different than I expected. Not really a comedy, although there were some funny moments, and maybe sappy in spots, but still very entertaining. It had a unique way of presenting the story that I won’t spoil here. Here’s a clue: I was reminded of the adventures of Gumby when he really got into a book. And I haven’t thought of Gumby for a long time. Probably longer than some of you youngsters have been alive.

Anyway, if you are looking for something to watch on the DVD, I can highly recommend this film.

but as for me, I’m sticking with the samgaetong…

For those who might not understand the reference, some Koreans believe eating dog meat on the hottest days of summer is good for the health. I’ve actually not met anyone who admits to eating dog meat though, but I’ve seen restuarants that specialize in this delicacy and pictures of the dog meat market. Not to be culturally insensitive but I find it all pretty disgusting. Frankly, the Koreans I know are also revulsed by the practice. The alternative is samgaetong, which is a chicken soup-like concoction. Bascially a half chicken served in a boiling broth. So tender it just falls off the bone. Which is good considering how klutzy I am with chopsticks. It is actually quite tasty.

Anyway, it has been miserably hot here these past few days. Air so thick with humidity you almost have to be a fish to breathe. And we are still in the midst of monsoon season, which means daily thunderstorms. Doesn’t seem to cool things off much though, just adds more moisture to the air. Ah well, not much you can do about the weather.

Pretty good night at the Dolce dart tourney last night. Two seconds and a first.

And that’s about it from here.

Great night for darts. Took down Gecko’s 13-6. As for me, went 6-0 with some six marks, five marks, tons+, and a 3bc. Maybe my slump is over…

Sorry, wrong hat.

Oh well, just thought it was time for a quick update on my so called life. Just finished a somewhat stressful week at work. I have been temporarily promoted to the Deputy Director position while the incumbent continues his battle with cancer. No big deal really, I’ve been basically performing the duties for the past several months. Now I’ll just make a tad more money for the effort.

One of my star employees has interviewed for a job in the States. I’m pretty much f’ed if she takes it as she is heading up the transition to the new National Security Personnel System, which is a ton of work and she has been doing an outstanding job with all the details required for our November implementation. I’ve been pushing her as hard as I dare to stay, but I think she will go if the offer is made. Well, no point in worrying about it overmuch, life goes on.

I was also recently “awarded” my first medal from the Army. Yes, folks, I am the proud recipient of the Korean Civilian Service Medal. What did I do to earn this honor you ask? Why, I completed two years of service here in the land of the morning calm. Which I guess makes it kinda akin to a Special Olympics participant award, but you know I still thought it was pretty cool. I guess I’m just easily pleased these days.

Lately I find myself dreaming of the Philippines. I’ve been checking out some expat websites and it is pretty amazing how well you can live there for just a small amount of money. I’m talking about having a nice house, live in maid, and livin’ large for two grand a month. And there are some real beautiful places, whether you like the beach or the mountains. It’s a freakin’ tropical paradise. Yeah, I need to go there and check it out on the ground. The poverty that surrounds you would take some getting use to for one thing. Still, nowhere is perfect and all things being equal I think I could adapt to living like a king in my golden years. Here’s one of the houses I kinda liked:

This is in a new subdivision in Tagaypay, a couple of hours north of Manila. It is actually pretty expensive for the Philippines at 6 million pesos, or about $122,000 US. I’ve seen better deals out there, but I’ve always fancied the idea of living in a log house. And this house would cost three times that in the USA. Well, who knows what the future holds. You gotta take each day one at a time and not get caught up living in the future (or the past for that matter). But it is also prudent to plan ahead. Watching my boss fight his battle with cancer and seeing people my age dying unexpectedly is pretty good motivation for thinking about what is really important in life. For me, it sure as hell isn’t work. I’m thinking January 2, 2011 is when I’m going to check out from the rat race. Here’s hoping I live that long.

I finally had some coworkers, including my Director, over for a dinner party last weekend. It went pretty well I suppose, although I’m not much for being a host. Lots of pressure to have everything turn out right. My boss finally told me to relax and enjoy myself. So, I had some more beer and things did turn out ok. Afterwards we all headed over to Grand Ol’ Opry for some good old fashion country music. We got a kick out of watching the Koreans doing the line dances and Texas two-step. Most of them are damn good and certainly much better at American-style dancing than I am. And of course at midnight we all stood up and sang “Proud to be an American” and “The Star Spangled Banner” which is the tradition at the Opry. A good night all in all.

What else? Well, I have hired a Korean tutor. My self-study program had kinda hit a wall, owing mostly to my lack of motivation and my tendency to be easily distracted (i.e. I find practicing darts more pleasurable than practicing Korean). Anyway, my tutor is the sister of a friend and I’m hoping my ego (read: fear of appearing stupid) will help me get my ass in gear and actually study. Plus, I am paying for these lessons so maybe the desire to get my money’s worth will also provide some incentive. I’ve also agreed to give her one hour a week of English tutoring (for free). I’m kinda looking forward to seeing if I’m any good at that sorta thing. I’m going to the bookstore later today to find an appropriate textbook to use.

And finally, let’s talk darts. I’m off to a slow start so far this season. I’ve managed to go 8-4 through the first two weeks, but my game is definitely off. I’m not getting much in the way of marks, and every leg is a struggle. Surprisingly, my wins are coming mostly in ’01 although I still believe cricket is my best game. I’ve been working hard in practice at hitting more triples, and that paid off last night in the Dolce tourney as I won the singles and finished second in doubles. Maybe I’m breaking out of my slump, we’ll see what happens Monday night.

And there you have it. The latest and greatest from yours truly.

Well, the first game of the summer/fall dart season commenced Monday night. We drew our nemesis and rival Alley Ratz from the 3 Alley Pub. Last time we met was in the league championship game, which we narrowly lost 10-9. Nothing nearly as dramatic this time as we were beaten rather handily 12-7.

It seems I always draw Max of the Ratz in singles–Monday was our third straight regular season matchup. Last season we traded 2-1 outcomes. He got me this time 2-1, although if I hadn’t been so inept in the third cricket leg I might have reversed that. I can’t afford to be off my game like that if Take it Easy is going to be competitive in the Artic Division (basically high B or low A calibre teams). Cuatro and I did take cricket doubles 3-0, but it was meaningless at that point as the match had already been decided.

The bright notes were Lonnie’s continued improvement. He played well against Eric who in the past would have dominated him. I’m looking for big things from Lonnie this season, he just needs to keep his confidence and improve his consistency. We also got our team jersey’s, although they arrived too late to be worn during the match. Lonnie did the graphic design, which is pretty damn cool–the Korean peninsula as the outline of a dart board. I will try to get a picture of the team in uniform next week.

Another tough matchup coming against the Wolfhound Pub team. Stay tuned.

Getting back into the routine of my life here, including the Friday night tourney at Dolce Vita.

The three week layoff has left me feeling a little uncomfortable with my throwing. I’m still getting decent results, but I just can’t seem to find my rhythm. Plus, I had some equipment trouble and had to replace my shafts with some that are a tad heavier. My darts seem to be highly sensitive to any aerodynamic alterations, and last night I was getting a lot of fallouts/bounceouts and a general lack of zip in my throws.

Regardless, Lonnie and I managed to finish second in the Early Bird tourney, and Dave and I took first place in the Die Hard event. Didn’t place in the Prime Time tournament, but my partner Margaret and I gave it a good run. So, coupled with my 100,000W payout from the challenge league championship I came home with more money in my pocket than I started with, which is good because I am definitely broke after my vacation.

Monday night the regular Seoul International Dart League season begins. We open with Alley Ratz from 3 Alley Pub, the team that beat us in the championship game last season. They look to be even stronger this year, so we have got our work cut out for us. Still, nobody has more fun than we do and I am really looking forward to getting back into the competition.

And that’s all I have to say about that.

Championship game against the Alley Ratz came down to the team game and we came up one dart short. We went down fighting though, and it’s hard to hang your head after a successful season and finals match as close as this one.

A recap:
0-3
1-5
3-6
6-6
9-6
9-9

and then the team game where both of us had taken shots at the out, and they got it first.

Lots of “woulda, coulda, shouda” but also some fine darts. We had to claw and scratch and dig ourselves out of a hole and gave them our best shot. We didn’t let them Take it Easy.

Congratulations to the Ratz.

Wait till next year!

Tourney time this weekend. Yesterday was the SIDL singles tournament at Blue Frog. I had a bye in the first round, then faced Grant. He took me in ’01 (overcoming my T-35) and I was pretty merciless in the cricket leg, pointing like mad. I was up by well over 100 points, needed two bulls for the win, and could not connect. I probably average one bull per 3 darts. I threw at least 20 times at the MFer with nothing to show for it. So, I lost a game I should have won. I believe it was the most disgusted I have every been with myself after a dart game.

I took the next three matches in the losers bracket throwing pretty solid and actually getting what turned out being the high out for the tourney, a 78. Then I wound up facing Cuatro. In the first leg he schooled me in cricket (pointing me at every opportunity) and winning handily. I held on to win the ’01 leg, so it was back to cricket for the marbles. I put my schooling from the first leg to good use, and had a one point lead heading into bulls. And then I suffered the recurring nightmare of being completely unable to throw a GD bullseye. Arrgh. I hate to lose, but losing like that just makes me so aggravated.

The good news I guess is that I still managed a 6th place finish, good for W40,000. Plus, W10,000 for high out. And I was really pleased that Colin played so well yesterday, winding up in 4th place. I know he was jazzed about that.

Also played in the inaugural Dolce Vita Friday night tourney. Had a good partner, but we faced two other strong teams out of the box and just didn’t execute well enough to win either match, so suffered an early elimination. Still, Jim was happy that we had twenty players there, and I’m thinking YJ enjoyed a packed bar of hard drinking darts players. Craig and his partner Alistair won the tourney and I don’t think I’ve ever seen a bigger grin than the one the Goat was wearing after that victory. Congrats again!

Someday I will post something here that doesn’t revolve around darts. But today is not that day.

Well, maybe not heaven, but I do believe last night’s playoff match against Sliders was the overall best I have ever had the pleasure of playing.

Sliders, the other Dolce Vita “B” team took first place in the East Division (we finished second in West) and had handed us our most lopsided loss earlier in the season when they took us down 15-4. So, we knew going in we had our work cut out for us. I was undecided how best to set our lineup and after discussing with the team we decided to do it the way we had done it all season, by random draw. In playoff competition, the first team that wins 10 legs takes the match and we felt we had to take at least 6 legs in singles to have a chance.

I was up first against Ray, a dangerous player who can kill you with triples when he is on. Fortunately for me, he was off his game a little and I had my darts working good enough to take a 3-0 win.

Lonnie was up next and he had the misfortune of drawing Alistair, the top ranked player in “B” league (who had lost 2 legs total all season). Lonnie struggled early in the season, but he has really stepped up his game in the second half, including throwing a 9-mark. He has been beating me regularly in practice ’01 games and playing with more confidence overall, but Alistair appeared to be a real mismatch. Lonnie was not intimidated and played a great ’01 game and just missed the double 17 out before Alistair outed on 4. The cricket game was not as close, but Lonnie hung tough and made Alistair work for the win. So, after two games we are tied 3-3.

Mario had to rush down from Uijongbu where he’s working this week to make the match, and he drew Jin for the third game. I think those two are pretty evenly matched, but last night Jin threw just well enough to take Mario 3-0, making it 3-6 going into the last singles game.

To reach our goal of winning six legs in singles we needed a sweep from Cuatro. He was playing Grant who has really been throwing great darts this season. Cuatro took a hard fought win in the first cricket leg, but Grant came back with a blistering ’01 game for the win. Cuatro won the diddle for the third leg, called cricket, and won handily. So, we stood at 5-7 going into doubles.

It was Mario and Jim versus Grant and Alistair in doubles ’01. We had to have one leg to get to the cricket doubles and to be honest I was not confident it was going to happen. Grant and Alistar have been pretty much unbeatable as ’01 partners this season and the way they played in the first leg it appeared the season was about to be over for Take it Easy. To their credit, Mario and Jim maintained confidence and focus and threw great darts to win that key second leg. Grant and Alistair recovered and took the third leg, leaving us at 6-9 heading into doubles cricket.

Cautro and I knew there was no margin for error, we had to take all three cricket legs to force a team game to decide the match. We came out smokin’ in the first leg and dominated Fred and Ray for the win. They jumped out to an early lead in the second leg, and we may not have caught them but for their inexplicable inability to close 15s. This allowed us to catch up and pass them in points and close 17s, our last open number. So, we had the advantage of 3 bulls to 5 and we took care of business for the sweep, leaving the scored tied 9-9 going into the team game.

During the season the team game (’01) is generally meaningless and consequently not taken too seriously. Not so last night, as players from both teams were quite intense and focused on getting the win. We built a hundred point lead which kept the pressure on them. We worked it down to a double 16 out and Jim (aka Mr. Closer) hit it with his first dart giving Take it Easy a sweet and hard earned victory. We now advance to the championship game next Monday against the 3 Alley Pub Alley Ratz.

Both of the Dolce Vita teams had great seasons, and it was nice that we played it so tight in our playoff match up. Hats off to the Sliders guys who have nothing to be ashamed of, our team had to throw some of our best darts of the year to eek out the win.

Thanks to YJ (Dolce Vita owner) for all the support she provided this season. She fed us all pizza last night and remained nuetral (even though her husband Jim plays for TIE), saying whoever wins Dolce will be playing for the championship. Thanks also to Colin and Scott from Blessed Bulls who came out and cheered us on. Your encouragement and support were really appreciated.

Had a tough negotiation with the Alley Ratz captain on picking the nuetral bar for Monday’s match. We wanted Bless U, they wanted Wolfhound. I nixed Wolfhound because there is only one board available there, so after much discussion we agreed to play at Friends Bar (halfway up hooker hill). Alley Ratz finished first in our division (finishing ahead of us by four legs) and we went 1-1 in head-to-head play during the regular season. They are an outstanding team and we should have a great match next week.

Win or lose, I must say this has been an amazing season in many ways. We lost our top player (Duke) early in the year but held it together to have a very successful and competitive team. And a team is what we became. We have a good mix of guys and we played through the good and bad nights without dissension or controversy. What mattered most was how we picked each other up, it seemed like when our top rated players were off, the other guys were always there to fill the gap. And that is what being a team is all about. I’m just proud to have been part of it.

We took Shooter R Us tonight 10-3. No thanks to me. I took the first leg in cricket then let the ’01 game slip away. Then got blasted in the 3rd leg cricket game. Cuatro got us even with a 2-1 win, then Mario and Jim pulled out 3-0 wins to give us a commanding lead. Cuatro and I finished with a first leg victory in the ’01 doubles to seal the victory.

Thursday we have the other Dolce team, the Sliders. They beat us 15-4 in our previous game so we have our work cut out for us. Still, if we do what we are capable of we should give them a good match. Time will tell.

I had a kinda weird night yesterday. It started out in typical fashion with me playing darts at Dolce Vita. I got there around 7 and left around 10. I had 3 (or maybe 4) draft beers during that time frame and also consumed 3 slices of pizza.

I walked home to the villa and as is my habit took the stairs from the basement parking garage up to my abode. Now, I live on the second floor, which makes 3 flights of stairs. Ok, sometimes I get confused and lose count. Like last night. So, I punch in my code on the front door keypad, open the door and step inside my apartment. Only, it wasn’t MY apartment. Which dawned on me pretty quickly when I noted the tasteful furnishings and lack of clutter, not to mention a barking dog.

So, I beat a hasty retreat but was more than a little astounded that the apartment directly below mine has the exact same four digit combination that I chose for my door (and just recently changed due to my having fired my now former housekeeper). What are the odds of that happening? (meaning the same combination, not the odds of me firing the housekeeper).

Shortly thereafter I needed to run a quick errand near the Hangangjin subway station. It’s only a few blocks away and I could have easily walked, but I didn’t. You know, one of the first observations most folks make upon moving to Korea is that traffic laws are very loosely enforced. Running red lights, driving on the sidewalk, illegal parking are all par for the course. Not that I engage in such practices, but it is a common enough occurrence as to not warrant more than a shrug.

The one exception I have noticed is drunk driving enforcement. Several times I have encountered the check points where the Korean police stop you and have you blow into a breathalyzer and then proceed on your way (provided you blow negative, which of course has always been the case with me). I support such tactics because it is insane to drive while drunk. When I’m driving in this wonderful country it often seems like even the stone cold sober drivers operate their vehicles as if inebriated. Maintaining strict situational awareness and exercising maximum defensive driving techniques is mandatory when sharing the road with insane cabbies, aggressive bus drivers, fearless motor scooter operators, and a generally clueless driving population.

Anyway, last night one of these checkpoints was set up right in front of the Hangangjin subway station. Now, I KNEW I was not drunk, but I also knew that I had never had anything to drink when I previously had to do the “blow and go” routine. Although I was not overly worried, I admit I was a tad disconcerted. So, I put my window down, the police officer sticks the breath detector in my face, I blow, and it beeps. He tells me to blow again, and I get the same result. At this point, another policeman, rather burly by Korean standards, comes to the window and barks “get out of the car”. I said, do you want me to pull over to the side of the road (this is a major four lane street) and he responds by yelling “GET OUT OF THE CAR”. So, I get out of the car and he gestures for me to go over to a police car parked at the side of the street.

Ok, at this point I am no longer disconcerted, I am actually feeling a fair amount of fear regarding the possible outcome and consequences of my first encounter with Korean law enforcement. I was quite confident I was not drunk, legally or otherwise, I’m a big guy and 3 or 4 beers over a 3 or 4 hour time period is just not enough to get me there. But that damn box I blew into seemed to believe otherwise. So the cop at the side of the road asks for my drivers license and asks if I speak hangul-mal. I figured if he heard my Korean he would definitely think I was drunk, so I said “annio”. About this time the burly cop walks up (he had moved my car to the side of the road) and asks for my license, and I indicated the other cop already had it. He took it, saw it was a SOFA license, and asked if I was Army. I said civilian. He then asked the question cops the world over must ask in this situation: “how much have you been drinking?” and I gave the standard response of “two beers” (yeah, yeah, not the whole truth but I was under a lot of stress).

The first cop then starts explaining the facts of life. Well, not explaining as much as drawing me a picture. On a piece of paper he wrote .5 with an arrow pointing up and .2 with an arrow pointing down. He pointed at the up arrow and said something about license and “100 days”, which I guess meant a suspension although in the back of my mind I was wondering about Korean prison conditions. I never did grasp the significance of the .2 and down arrow. Then he set up the high tech breathalyzer with a tube to blow in. They gave me some water and indicated I should gargle, which seemed like a good idea to me too. He patiently demonstrated how I was to blow into the tube, and showed me that the breath reader was set at 00.0. So, I blew. But the cop said “not long enough”. He reset to zero and had me blow again and I got it right this time.

Then we all stood there watching my “score” get tallied. It went 1, 3, 5, 7, 9 and I was about to freak out until I realized that it was the number after the decimal. Whew. Then the big numbers came up, but thankfully stopped well under that ominous “5”. 2.5 to be exact, one half of the legal limit. So, I was vindicated. Mr. Burly Cop returned my keys and said I could go.

I must admit my heart was racing and I had to smoke a couple of cigarettes before I resumed driving. You know, I was not drunk but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t stupid. Stupid for putting myself in that situation. Stupid for driving after any drinking period. Especially when I know you have to have your wits about you whenever you drive the mean streets of Seoul. Had I been in an accident I have no illusions about who the courts would deem to be at fault.

So, that was my lesson learned and my advice to you wherever you may be is: if you drink, don’t drive. Nothing good can come of it.

We finished up the dart season last night against our neighbor bar, the Bless U Blessed Bulls. First place for us was not mathematically impossible, but we had to win three more legs than the Alley Ratz in the final game and we had the stronger opponent. So, we went in knowing every leg was important. Blessed Bulls had clinched the wild card slot so they were just playing for pride. And they are one proud bunch.

Cuatro got us started out right by taking his match 3-0. Mario was next and he has been struggling a little the past few weeks. He dropped the cricket leg, but came from behind in the next two ’01 games to secure a 2-1 win. Lonnie followed and had the misfortune of drawing Scott as his opponent. Lonnie threw some good darts, but lost two close legs, resulting in an 0-3.

I was matched up with Craig. We had also played when our teams met earlier in the season, and I had pulled out a 2-1 victory. He was looking for a little revenge last night I expect. Anyway, I managed to take the first cricket leg and was feeling confident going into the ’01 game. Confidence doesn’t take the place of throwing good darts however, and Craig punished me by outing while I still in the high hundreds. But that was nothing compared to the ass kicking I took in the third leg. Craig took the diddle and called cricket. He closed 20’s to start and I hit one. He threw a 19 and a 20 for points. I missed 3 at the 19. He hit 4 19s, I answered with 2 18s. Not looking good, but I’ve come back from bigger deficits. Craig then hit the triple 18, triple 17, and triple 16 for the rare and coveted 9 mark. And that was that. I did manage to throw three single bulls in a meaningless gesture prior to be dispatched by Craig.

Koichi and Craig then took Jim and Mario 3-0 in ’01 doubles, while Cuatro and I followed up with 3-0 win in cricket doubles. Which put us at 9-9 going into the team game. That game came down to the wire as well, but Lonnie managed a double 3 out which gave Take it Easy a 10-9 victory for the night. It doesn’t get any closer than we played it last night and we really appreciated the competition and sportsmanship of the Blessed Bulls.

Playoffs start next week….

One thing about the expat lifestyle is you get to meet and interact with lots of folks from other lands who are also on a quest of discovery. I have certainly encountered more Canadians here in Korea than I did in all my years of living in relatively close proximity to the Great White North. And having made some friends amongst these strange and mysterious people I have learned that the stereotypical view many Americans hold of our northern cousins just doesn’t hold up on close examination. In fact, I have found that Canadians are in many ways people in their own right. Go figure. (that was intended as satirical humor, just in case you missed it. Don’t want this post to be used as motivation to fire up the Blessed Bulls prior to our Monday matchup).

What prompted this post was a couple of things. First, I find this link to a story about a survey being conducted to determine “the worst Canadian of all time”. Seems that some folks want to establish that not all Canucks are polite, kind, and generous. The article says that Celine Dion and Shania Twain are in the running, but of course the leader is some hockey guy named Harold Ballard. And if you have heard of him, I expect you are Canadian (or at least related to one).

My vote, if I had one, which I don’t, being as how like most Americans I know little of that mysterious land (although I expect I could name at least five provinces if someone held a gun to my head), would be for the Canadian English teacher I encountered on last week’s river cruise. Now, this wasn’t really a hoity-toity affair, but most people dressed appropriately for the occassion. And the young cadre of ill-groomed, blue jeaned and t-shirted young people hanging out at the stern just screamed English teachers. Hey, live and let live and all that. I even borrowed a cigarette lighter from one of them. Now, they weren’t being particularly rude or loud or anything. But their wimpy facial hair and goatees just screamed liberal and their superior attitude reaked of disdain for anything as uncouth as an ignorant American. I knew they weren’t french (lack of capitalization intentional) as there were no berets and the women had shaved their legs and armpits. So, they had to be Canadian, right? Or maybe I just read too much into it. Whatever. (and yeah, I am still being satrical. Although, I guess if you have to continuously point that out, it nullifies the satire, doesn’t it?)

At the end of the cruise we had docked but folks were still milling about drinking wine, chatting and enjoying the fine April evening. Then one of the aforementioned individuals, a male in his early 20s, began removing his clothing. There were at least 50 people on the fantail plus another hundred or so walking along the Han riverside. He got down to his boxers, climbed up on the railing, and announced he was going to do a backflip into the river. And to the shock of the more reserved patrons and the amusement of his friends, he proceeded to do so. It was pretty insane. He swam around a little and I walked over to the rail and noted there was no way he could climb back on board and given the height of the dock (and lack of ladders) and the flood levee that constitutes the banks of the Han, he was going to have to be swimming for quite some time. Given his apparent state of inebriation I had visions of a tragic end to an otherwise pleasant day.

After 10 minutes or so, one of his friends climbed over the railing and perched precariously on the small outcrop at the stern and offered his arm, which was taken, and then another gent helped hoist him out of the water and back on board. The swimmer stood there grinning and dripping on the deck and must have enjoyed the attention, because he then jumped back into the river. You know, I’m sure he imagined himself the cool daredevil, but if he had heard the comments being muttered by the passengers standing near me, he might have been ashamed even in his drunken state of mind. Meanwhile, all these Koreans are lining the riverside snapping photos. God only knows what they were saying, but I don’t expect they were impressed. Eventually he was again pulled from the river and someone asked his friends where the swimmer was from. One of the gals loudly proclaimed “today he is an American!” Which kind of pissed me off and confirmed my earlier suspicions regarding his country of origin. I’ll bet he also has a maple leaf on his backpack.

But in all honesty I will say he is the exception to the otherwise fine cadre of Canadians I have had the pleasure of interacting with here in the land of the morning calm. So, here’s a shout out to Jenn of I’ve Got Two Shoes fame. My first Canadian buddy who I hope decides to stay in Korea, takes a job in Seoul, and joins the dart league. And Von Jackass, a smart and witty guy. Then there is Keel, the online novelist. Here’s a taste from Chapter 4 (which I hadn’t read before writing this post, but makes me feel less bad for good naturedly ragging on those who remained loyal to the Crown):

Although terrorism had not yet made a mark on Canada, it had sickened him to see what had befallen his historical brothers to the south – the brothers that had rebelled against the King – the black sheep of the family. They were still family though, even if they didn’t know it and acted like a spoiled kid sometimes. Keel had worked with American Special Forces in his past and had made lifelong friends with some of them. They were his brothers in arms and he felt the two countries were brothers as well. Brothers that had a common historical background, even if one had broken away from the empire at an early age while the other hadn’t.

And finally a guy I actually admire, The Goat. Of course, he is from Alberta which from what I’ve heard is not much like the rest of Canada, at least in attitude. You need to check out this video on his blog which is funny as hell and is exactly how I intended to introduce myself to Jenn should we ever meet in the 3D world.

The Goat is also a real creative guy and a fierce dart competitor. Leave a number open with him in cricket at your peril. His update of a Johnny Cash song (left in my comments to the previous post) is classic. In fact, it deserves posting in its own right:

(sung to the tune of “Don’t take your guns to town”)

A young shooter named The Goat grew restless on the farm
A bovidae filled with wonderlust who really meant no harm
He changed his clothes and shined his shoes
And combed his light hair down
And his wife cried as he walked out

Don’t take your darts to the ‘Twan babe
Leave your darts at home Goat
Don’t take your darts to the ‘Twan

So, who says Canadians don’t have a sense of humor?

UPDATE: Jenn contributes this interesting link of popular Canadian misconceptions…

Yes, I am alive and relatively well. Wanted to clear that up.

Saturday I took a wine cruise on the Han river. It was supposed to be a group outing with a bunch of people from work, but in the end there were just 3 of us. A good time was had and much wine was consumed. Which I guess was the point.

Sunday I took the cable car to Seoul Tower. First time I had been up there. A tad hazy, but still a spectacular view.

Last night we managed to take the Alley Ratz 12-7. That may have been enough to put us in first place by percentage points, but the Ratz still have a makeup game to play this week with the Blessed Bulls so that could change. We finish the year with the Bless U guys on Monday so they will be deciding one way or the other who wins the division.

Sorry I’ve been away this long. More sorry I still don’t have anything to say.