About John McCrarey

Born and raised in southern California. My career exodus has taken me to Arizona, Oklahoma, Arkansas, South Carolina, Virginia, and Washington, DC. And as of 23 January 2005, Seoul, Korea. Married with 6 grown children (blended family). First grandchild is in the oven! I created this blog to document my adventures as an expat living and working in Korea. I'm also pretty confident that I will on occasion feel the need to express my views on current events and other matters I find of interest.

Time to party

I have the Friday group hike coming up at 0900, and the Hash Christmas party is a 1:00, so it is now or never if I’m going to dispense my daily dose of bullshit here at LTG. So, let’s get to it.

At my age, every day is special, and yesterday was no exception. That’s not to say I did anything special, but I still enjoyed filling in the hours, however comfortably and well. We did a walk to the Subic Market and dispensed some sweets to the children we encountered along the way. Swan picked up her Christmas present from me while we were there. Later, we enjoyed a nice dinner at Jewel Cafe and some liquid refreshments in the Green Room afterward. Yep, just another typical day in paradise. Here’s some of what it looked like:

Heading out for our trek
Beth, head waitress at Wet Spot, joined us for the hike
First delivery of the day
The writing on the wall. Something doesn’t add up here.
As close as we got to Easter Mountain this time.
You are welcome!
We didn’t expect to see so many kids out on a school day. Not sure what’s up with that.
On the streets of Calapacuan
A scenic river
Walking the plank
A peaceful fish pond
Highway walking with a couple of slowpokes
The back way to the market is more pleasant than the highway
He was born when I was in high school. Way too young to go.
And there is the Subic Market in the distance
Subic town
The goodies for this week’s Candy Walk
My walk app offers three sets of maps from which to choose. This is the satellite version.
The standard version
And my favorite is the hybrid. Our journey was just a tad under 8K yesterday.

And here is my gift to Swan:

An electric vehicle. Practically a steal at just over $1500.00.
Front and rear seating
The rear-end
And the dashboard

To be honest, I’m a little worried about her driving this on the highway. Traffic moves fast, and these are slow. But she is a grown-up with a driver’s license, so hopefully, she’ll exercise good judgment on the road.

When it was time to head into town, we walked. Walk out, trike home is just the way I roll.

Beauty in the sky
Beauty on the street
Beauty on the dinner plate.

We both had the Jewel filet mignon for 499 pesos each. It’s a small cut but very tasty. The last time we ate these, they had gravy on the meat; this time, I ordered it on the side. And plopping the steak on top of the mashed potatoes was something I’d never seen. It was easy enough to move it, but it just seemed strange.

So, I calculated that I could afford to indulge the potato calories. I limited my evening intake to six gin and sodas. And when I got home, I discovered I was out of my preferred sugar-free pudding dessert. So, I made a batch of blueberry/pineapple smoothies instead.

And that put me over the top. Oops. Well, my pudding order should arrive tomorrow, and Swan made some sugar-free gelatin for tonight.

And the Friday weigh-in results:

  • Today’s weight: 240.6
  • Last week: 245.2
  • Reduction: 4.6 pounds.
  • Starting weight: 267.1
  • Overall reduction: 26.5 pounds

Slow but steady progress. At least I’m moving in the right direction.

Today’s memories courtesy of Facebook:

Eleven years ago, I was enjoying suburban life in my Columbia, SC house. Damn, don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone…
Nine years ago, there was a parade in Itaewon to celebrate the birth of the pedophile Mohammed. I got in trouble at work for calling him that on my blog. But how else do you describe someone who married a 12-year-old?

No time for me to parse a YouTube video today. Sorry!

I do have these tidbits of humor to share:

Dude, nothing beats the real thing!
More proof that size doesn’t matter.
Anything is possible, Spock.

And that’s all for now, folks. Back tomorrow (I hope).

The story of my life

It was twenty years ago today when Long Time Gone was born into the blogosphere. What a ride it has been! Of course, things seldom go as planned, but I had no clue at the time that the journey I was about to embark on would completely and irrevocably change everything and lead me to places beyond my wildest imagination. In my “do-over” afterlife fantasy, there are many things I would change, but making the move to Korea and leaving my vanilla American life behind forever is not one of them. Here’s what I had to say twenty years ago in my first blog post, “And So It Begins”:

I’m moving to Seoul, Korea. Although the general consensus among family and friends is that I’ve lost my mind (which I don’t necessarily deny), this is something of a calling for me. One of my biggest regrets in life was not serving in the military. My father and two brothers are Army vets. My daughter is currently serving her second tour in Afghanistan with the 82nd Airborne. I am incredibly proud of her and all our troops who are sacrificing so much to defend our freedom and to bring freedom from tyranny to others. Sitting on the sidelines watching these incredible men and women making a difference in the world has only exacerbated my desire to find some tangible way to make a contribution in support of our military. Of course, at 49 my options are somewhat limited. I have been a federal civilian employee for over 28 years, and so for the past several months I have been applying for civilian jobs with the Department of Defense. I was not selected for a position I applied for in Iraq, but the Army offered me a job in South Korea and I have accepted. I don’t presume to think that doing a civilian gig in Seoul is heroic or particularly self-sacrificing, but if in some small way I can play a part in our national defense, I am proud to do so.

Ok, that’s the altruistic reason for going, such as it is. On a more personal level, I have lived a very comfortable life. Too comfortable perhaps. The chance to live and work overseas in a totally alien culture seems to be an exciting opportunity to get out of my box and experience a new lifestyle. Yes, I am looking forward to the adventure. Of course, the nature of adventure is the not knowing how things will turn out. I know I will miss my family and friends and everything that is familiar and wonderfully American. I have made a two-year commitment to the Army, and if I am miserable and lost and lonely, well I will deal with it and learn what I can from the experience. Going in, I have a positive attitude and believe that I have the power to determine what I gain and how I grow as I live this new life.

So, this blog will serve as a diary of my life in Korea. It will be a place where I share my thoughts on what I am seeing, doing, and learning. And since I am fairly political and opinionated, there will likely be some commentary on my views on world events. I have been a blog reader since I discovered the blogosphere shortly after 9/11. This is my first attempt at writing a blog, and that will be part of the adventure I am undertaking.

My original intent when starting LTG was to have an easy way to stay in touch and share with my friends and family back home what was happening in my Korean life. These days, no one from those long ago times reads the blog or cares about me and my so-called life here in the Philippines. Everything changes, but this journey of mine still goes on until I finally reach the end of my road. And I intend to keep writing this public diary of mine even if no one cares enough to read it. I know I have a handful of loyal followers, and that means a lot to me, even if your reward is being subjected to my daily dose of drivel. Thank you!

I have occasionally fantasized about writing the story of my life. Perhaps one day, my descendants will want to learn more about that crazy relative who left everything behind and moved to Asia. In some ways, this blog fulfills that purpose. My plan now is to spend the next few months scrolling through the archives for the rare post that might be worthy of inclusion in my unwritten autobiography. I’ve created a new tag, “The story of my life,” to add to those posts so they will be easy to find in the future. And I’ll share a link to those stories with my readers as I find them.

Over the past twenty years, I have written 5,326 posts and received 17,181 comments. Happy blogiversary! I hope you’ll stick around to see what happens next.

And here’s what happened yesterday:

The morning dog walk to start the day

And then it was time for the Wednesday Walkers group hike. We took a Jeepney out to the far side of Subic and commenced our hike from there.

Out of the Jeepney
And off we go!
Leaving the city behind
Catching up after a pee stop
Bushy grasses would be our bane for much of the hike
Mostly flat, but this was a tricky down
We last came this way in March. It wasn’t so overgrown with plant life back then.
Ah, the wide-open spaces!
It’s so much easier to walk on the dirt road. It didn’t last long, though.
Working the fields
Graffiti, Filipino-style
Village life
The road’s gone, but the grass is low for now.
Lollipop delivery
Pausing for the group shot. Biggest turnout we’ve had for a while.
A hard-working carabao
Life on the farm
Marching single file
It held her!
And then it got wet and muddy
How muddy? This muddy.
We needed to cross the river, but some of us wanted a better option for doing so.
Washing the mud off our shoes was an added benefit
The carabao didn’t mind us passing through his turf
That bridge most of us didn’t take
These two gals did, though
Well done, Beth
This cow was a little freaked out seeing us pass through. At least he ran the other way instead of at us.
And then there was another water crossing
No dry shoe option this time
Through the fields we go
It seems strange to grow a crop in the riverbed, but whatever it takes
Slippin’ on down to the river
And then wading across
There is freedom in wet feet–you don’t have to care anymore.
Through another small village
Then back on the pavement
All the Jeepneys passing by were full
But then we were able to flag down a passing Victory Line and rode back to Barretto in comfort
Just about 6.5K from start to finish

Swan and I killed the evening hours with visits to It Doesn’t Matter and a nightcap at Wet Spot.

I made it, but just barely.

Remembering when we were a family:

Both my brothers are still alive; I just never hear from them anymore.

And now for a taste of politics:

Funny and sad how that works

In today’s YouTube video, Reekay recounts the sad tale of expat Ted. I spend more than I should and have depleted a sizeable chunk of my savings, but that monthly government pension deposit is ample to keep me living large—at least until the USA goes bankrupt. Avoiding four years of Kamala spending might be the miracle we’ve needed.

And some humor, if you please:

That kid is going places!
Time to wrap it up, Kirk
Maybe it’s a hump too far

Anyway, here’s to hoping it will be a Long Time Gone before my blogging days are over. I ain’t in no hurry to give it up.

The sands of time

The hourglass that is your lifetime comes in many sizes; in most cases, the bigger, the better. If a grain of sand is the equivalent to a day in the life, here’s what my particle of yesterday looked like:

Feeling like a king doing the grocery shopping at Royal.
A discounted Nativity scene. Yeah, I don’t believe that story either.
Home from shopping, I embarked on a 4K neighborhood walk on the streets of Alta Vista.

Then, I was off to an appointment with Dr. Jo for the second installment of my chelation therapy. Other than getting a needle poke for the injection, it was pretty painless. This will likely be a regular event for the next several weeks. It’s 2000 pesos a pop, but if it helps clear those blocked arteries, it is worth the time and money.

It being Tuesday, Baloy Beach was next on our agenda.

Toes in the sand again
The floating bar view. As I expected, the cloud cover precluded seeing the sunset.
A gin and soda night for me
A batch of my brownies for the brown knees on board
Swan and Lizza (the Kokomo owner’s spouse)
A quiet Tuesday on the beach, but it was surprisingly busy on the floating bar
I didn’t get to see the sun go down behind the mountain, but it left a colorful sky for me to enjoy
Goodbye until next week
Next stop, Treasure Island
Swan had tacos for dinner
And I couldn’t resist the beef enchiladas. I only ate one last night and saved the other for breakfast. That’s how you divide and conquer those calories!

So, I mentioned a while back that Swan had bought some almond flour and keto sugar. Yesterday, she put her new ingredients to work and baked a carrot cake.

It came out looking like a regular carrot cake does.
This slice was my dessert when we got home last night.

I’m sorry to say, looks can be deceiving. It tasted dry and unsweet, lacking the flavorful richness I’m accustomed to. That small slice cost me 180 calories, and it was unsatisfying to my sweet tooth. Needless to say, I won’t be tempted to indulge again.

Another under-budget day

One year ago, the next step in my recovery from nasal nodule surgery was removing the internal bandages.

Not a pretty sight and it was painful as well.

Today’s YouTube video is from one of my favorite vloggers, The Filipina Pea. In this installment, she responds to viewers’ emails in a fashion reminiscent of Dear Abby. Some of the situations these guys get into with their Filipinas are so bad as to be almost funny. Not that I have any room to talk. My biggest diversion (perversion?) was dating the eighteen-year-old and not grasping how weird it truly was until my granddaughter celebrated her eighteenth birthday. Nope, I couldn’t continue on that road after that. Still, I never even considered asking out the mother of a girl I had been dating like one of Pea’s fans. Pea is wise beyond her years in the advice she provides.

If that wasn’t funny enough, how about these:

That’s one of my old jokes, captured in a meme. Oh well, I stole it from somewhere anyway. My version was: Forget the past; it can’t be changed. Forget the future; it’s a mystery. Forget the present, I didn’t get you one.
I guess that’s one form of dating
It seems Olive is always trying to make it hard on Popeye.

So, I had a good hike this morning and have no plans as yet for this evening. Something special is coming here to LTG tomorrow. I hope you’ll come back and read all about it.

Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin'
Into the future
Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin'
Into the future

That really gets my goat!

It was a good Hash trail yesterday, especially since our shortcuts preempted the main hill climb. Most of the trail we did was through familiar territory, and as usual, Leech My Nuggets did an excellent job marking our path, so there were no wrong turns. There was, however, a butthead on the trail that tried to fuck things up for us. Thankfully, we avoided the worst of his aggression, but Pubic Head took a painful hit that knocked him to the ground and left him bruised. You just never know when some mean fucker is going to attack as you innocently walk by. Sure, you can play it safe and give a carabao a wide berth, but you don’t expect a goat to turn on you. In this case, the goat was tied next to our narrow path, and there was no room for a walkaround. Pubic Head was leading the way and was surprised to suddenly come under attack. As I approached the scene, the goat turned and came towards me. I gave him a whack on the head with my walking stick; he paused, then put his head down and pushed towards me once more, so I hit him again. We seemed to be at an impasse, but then one of the group yanked his rope, and the goat retreated, allowing us to make our escape. Later, we ran out of beer before the Hash Circle was over. Two fuck ups in one Hash sucks. Oh well, it could have been worse. I didn’t get impaled or impaired, as I was limited to Zero beers—six of them.

The Hash trail started at the 7-Eleven in Matain. We walked there from Barretto, adding around two kilometers to the grind. You can see how much the gals that accompanied me enjoyed it!
The gathering Hash
I thought crossing the highway would be the most dangerous part of the hike. I was blissfully unaware of the goat fuck to come.
The rare shot of me leading the pack. It lasted for all of fifty yards or so.
The first climb of the day
Come on up, the weather’s fine!
Back on the flat
Woodsy
Streetwalkers
Onward we trudge
Man on a hot tin roof
Cums Alone doing her thing
Feeling a little down
More kids along the way
And now, a stroll through the valley
Walkin’ the line
Not much margin for error
This was a wicked combination of water, mud, and barbed wire.
As we were passing through the Divine Mercy graveyard, Cums Alone left the road. When I asked where she was going, she told me, “To see my mom.”
She left a wildflower she had picked on the gravestone
My first Easter Mountain shot of the day
I was in the process of taking this photo when I heard a shout, and the group came to a halt. As I approached, Pubic Head was just getting up off the ground.
Then, it was my turn to confront the deranged goat. I gave him a couple of whacks, but he didn’t back off. Fortunately, when someone tugged on his rope, he retreated without further incident.
And then we had a river crossing
The freedom of wet feet
Another Easter Mountain view
Back on the relative safety of the wide open road
Three years older than me when her time was up.
Heading up into Alta Vista
Three different trails have gone this way, but #1631 is the one that mattered yesterday
On-Home at Leech My Nuggets’ place
Hanging out before the Circle
The Circle
Deflowering a virgin
This week the Hashit went to Tiny Cunt Fucker
The way it was—8K for the yellow and 6K with our shortcuts in purple. I added 2K with the walk from my place.

As I mentioned, the beer ran out before the Hash was over. Since we were already in Alta Vista, we went home instead of visiting IDM. Walking in the dark, even for a short distance, wasn’t fun. But we made it without a fall, so there’s that. A burger patty for dinner, then viewing some crappy YouTube videos before calling it a night.

Back on track

I’m looking better than I was one year ago:

Breathing better now that those nose nodules have been removed

Today’s YouTube video is entitled “Five Minutes of Your Life You’ll Never Get Back.” Since I invested five minutes of my precious time, here’s your opportunity to do the same. It’s a video from a trike ride through the streets of Angeles City. There is no commentary whatsoever. Being a sometimes visitor to AC, I recognized some of the scenes. It didn’t make me miss it there, though.

To the humor, then:

It looks more like a tongue-lashing
‘Tis the season
If she wasn’t on the naughty list, she is now!

I’ll be visiting Dr. Jo this afternoon for round two of my chelation therapy. Then, we’ll move on to Baloy Beach for our Tuesday floating bar experience. Back with more on this tomorrow.

I’ll be visiting Dr. Jo this afternoon for round two of my chelation therapy. Then, we’ll move on to Baloy Beach for our Tuesday floating bar experience. Back with more on this tomorrow.

Weekend wrap-up

Goodbye to you, Pozorrubio. Perhaps we will meet again next year.
Well I woke up Sunday mornin', with no way to hold my head that didn't hurt
And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad, so I had one more, for dessert
Then I fumbled through my closet, for my clothes and found my cleanest dirty shirt
And I shaved my face and combed my hair and, stumbled down the stairs to meet the day

I’m no Kris Kristofferson, so after my forgotten Saturday night, my head didn’t hurt, and I didn’t have a beer for breakfast. Maybe I should have.

Remnants from my drunken shopping at 7-Eleven the night before sufficed for my Sunday morning breakfast. Actually, the Snickers bar is “only” 279 calories, and it satisfied my hunger until we were back home for a proper lunch.

We rode home with Tiny Cunt (Keith) and his girl for a comfortable two-and-a-half-hour trip. Along the way, we passed the cleanest city in the Philippines.

Sorry for the blurry photo; it was taken at high speed on the expressway. I’ve heard lots of talk about Concepcion being “immaculate.” (Yes, I went through all that effort just to make this lame joke, but that’s the way I roll.)

Anyway, we arrived home a little after eleven. Swan prepared a nice ribeye steak and broccoli lunch, and then I got to work on yesterday’s massive post. When I finished that, it was time to prepare myself for my Sunday evening endeavors.

Dinner for the five Hideaway gals delivered from Jewel Cafe lightened my wallet by 1500 pesos.

Hideaway had a decent crowd, so that was good to see. The girls enjoyed their food and thanked me profusely. I had two gin and sodas, then headed across the highway to John’s Place for dinner with my sweetheart.

That would be her.
The view from John’s when I arrived.
And a bit later after sundown.
I continued my calorie splurge by satisfying my craving for birria tacos. Three to a serving, but I gave one of them to Swan, thereby limiting the damage to 400 calories. Oh, and I washed it down with a gin and soda.

With dinner over and done with, we moseyed up the highway to The Green Room to enjoy our nightcap. Swan brought some of John’s delicious chicken wings to share with our favorites there. Three more gin and sodas, and we called it a night. I satiated my sweet tooth with some canned cranberries, then hit the hay.

That’s three days in a row I exceeded my calorie goal. I’ll try to do better this week.
And eat less!

Here are a few other photos from my weekend on the farm:

The hotel we stayed in this year. Last year at The Mansion was more to my liking.
Is it RDT or J’adore Grand? If they don’t know, I sure as hell don’t, although the trike drivers call it RDT.
A view from my third-floor room. The room wasn’t much better, and the wifi sucked.
That’s our room with the towels in the window. I told Swan the housekeeper would bring fresh towels, and Swan said, “What if no one comes to clean?” Turns out, she was right.
Heading out to start our Saturday with Haggis Bash Hash. If you read yesterday’s post, you already know how it ended for me.
Our Hash host and farm owner, Honeydew.
Christmas decorations down on the farm. Well, I brought the lady with me.
That’s my fat gut at the Friday circle
And my drunk ass at Saturday night’s after-Hash gathering of the Subic Bay contingent.

So, been there, done that, got the t-shirt:

And life goes on until it doesn’t.

Speaking of which, this was my life twelve years ago:

A cigarette in my hand and a wife at my side. Everything changes, not always for the better.

It was good to see that our soon-to-be former President is being appropriately honored by the USPS:

Today’s YouTube video once again raises the question of why some folks are quitting the Philippines. I don’t know anyone bailing for other than medical issues, but maybe my circle knew the things the vlogger identifies and came anyway. I know nothing here took me by surprise. Sure, there are frustrations, but that would be true wherever I lived.

And now the jokes are on me:

Sounds more like “All In The Family” than “Star Trek”
Talk about an asswhuppin’
And now we’ve covered both sides of the spectrum

Hash Monday has arrived once again. Leech My Nuggets is the Hare, and the On-Home will take place at his house here in Alta Vista. Leech is one of the best when it comes to a well-marked trail, which I always appreciate. He also provided my fellow short cutter, Pubic Head, with a map in advance so we could plot our deviations. And so we have done. I’ll let you know how that works out for us tomorrow.

I came across today’s music video in my Facebook memories. Arizona was the best place I’ve ever lived (at least in the USA), and this song has always had a special place in my heart. It’s from the opening credits of the movie Junior Bonner and was filmed in Prescott, the town where I used to live. The songwriter and performer, Rod Hart, played in a bar band in Prescott and I had the pleasure of seeing him perform live on several occasions. Give it a listen:

Morning, Arizona morning
Almost sets me free
Makes me glad to be alive
Wondering, why I started wandering
Should have stayed right here
Underneath the clear blue skies

Sadness, changing now to gladness
With the rustle of the breeze
Through the pinon trees where I lay
In the morning, Arizona morning
A place where I can smile
And see a hundred miles away

The birds are flying high above the morning
Singing to the colors of the dawn
And in my mind, I hear a gentle warning
You've been a rounder and a rambler much too long
And a rover, wishing it was over
All my battles won, resting in the sun this way

In the morning, Arizona morning
Coming home today, wishing I could stay
Wishing I could stay

Here’s the movie (slightly shorter) version that I had posted on Facebook all those years ago:

And I also came across this short video talking about some of the backstage shenanigans that resulted in a bar band performer doing the opening song in a Sam Peckinpah film:

A long hard one

Get your mind out of the gutter; I’m not talking about THAT! It was a busy and full Saturday at the Haggis Hash. There were two trail options for the morning hike–a short 3.5K trail or a long 9.5K version. I was hoping for something in between, but since I was unfamiliar with the area, shortcutting wasn’t a consideration. As we departed, I still hadn’t made up my mind about what I was going to do. And then when we reached the spot where the short trail diverged, I impulsively decided to go the distance and do the long trail. Shocking, I know. Swan came along with me, but I sensed she wasn’t happy about it initially. But she came around as we shared the adventure. It took us over two hours to finish the well-marked trail, but surprisingly, we finished ahead of four other Hashers. Here are some photos of our journey:

Gathering at the start
On-On!
The middle of the pack
And the back of the pack, where I tend to hang out
The goats seemed surprised to see us
There go the short trail takers
And that’s the way ahead for the long walkers. The majority of this group is already so far in front of us that they are out of sight.
A couple of Hashers are still in view up ahead, but that didn’t last long. For most of the remainder of the hike, it was just the two of us. Thankfully, the Hare did a great job marking the trail, and Swan has sharp eyes and saw the marks I missed.
The first kids we saw on the hike. And yes, we had goodies to share.
Farm country is flat and that’s a feature I like
I thought this decrepit building was unoccupied until I saw the laundry hung out to dry.
And we were surprised to see an old woman in a wheelchair inside. That’s Swan giving the granny some cookies.
It was a hot day, and occasional spots with shade were refreshing
More kids receiving the cookie bounty
The Hare used strips of tissue paper for trail markings, which could be seen from a distance and helped to keep us on the right path. That’s better than the ribbons sometimes used at the Subic Hash because the paper is biodegradable and will disappear after some rain.
A shady spot pause
Ah, the proverbial rickety bridge crossing. This one doesn’t look very strong or sturdy,
Swan is only half my size
It was dicey in places, but I made it across
Swimming in the river
Still going strong
Wife says, “you can have a truck or a motorcycle, but not both!”
Well, looky there, other Hashers! Turns out they had missed a turn and had to backtrack allowing us to get ahead of them.
The first water crossing of the day
Swan wasn’t happy about getting her shoes wet
We gave this cow plenty of room as we passed
A brief walk in the woods
And then back out in the sunny fields
The Hare is fucking with us at about the halfway point in our journey. “Walang” means none.
Not as impressive as the dams on Kevin’s walk, but this is the Philippines.
More kids to please
Walking on the rocky riverside
And then walking in the river
Flirting with my girlfriend?
I’ll take that as a good sign
Now I’m motivated!
I recognize that windmill! Our Haggis On-Home farm is in sight!
I don’t recall any Hash trail I’ve done longer than this one. Glad it was flat!
The way we walked.

The hiking was done, but the Haggis festivities were just beginning. It started with a hamburger lunch. I skipped the buns but had two patties and some potato salad. I drank tea with the meal, knowing that I had several hours to go and the beer could wait. When we moved outside for the games, I started on the beer but worked hard at slowing down my usual rate of consumption. I was also feeling tired, in part from the hike but also because it was the time of day I normally nap. I elected not to participate in the Haggis games, instead finding a shady spot to sit and sip my beer.

I occasionally got my lazy ass up to check how the games were going. This was the piggyback race.
Swan and her partner in the sack race.
Swan’s team finished second
I’d never seen an event quite like this one. The girls are blindfolded and pass buckets of water by pouring it into the bucket being held behind them. It was kind of fun to watch.
Not surprisingly, most of them ended up wet.

So, the games went on for a couple of hours, and then it was finally time to begin the Hash Circle. They don’t do ice at the Haggis Hash, but they did employ a “bucket brigade” to toss water on Hashers when called upon to do so. I got my turn to be drenched before the circle ended.

My view at the Circle. There must have been more than a hundred Hashers in attendance.
We were served “Scottish eggs” as a snack at the Circle.
The bucket brigade in action
Me after my drenching

After a long-ass Circle finally ended, we moved back inside for the dinner.

The bagpipe man
The bagpiper led the procession to kick off the dinner. A short speech was made in a thick Scottish brogue that I didn’t understand a word of.
Everyone was provided this small serving of haggis with some sweet potato. There was also a full-fledged dinner buffet, so no one went home hungry.

I arrived at the farm around 9 a.m. We started the trail at 10 and finished around 12:30. I had my first beer a little after 1:00. The games finished after four o’clock, and the circle went on until 6:30. Dinner was served at 7 p.m. We left the Hash sometime after 8:00 but didn’t return directly to the hotel. Instead, we stopped in town at a beer garden. I don’t recall whose idea that was.

The Subic contingent and buckets of beer.
And we were serenaded at our table by this duo.

That’s all I remember. I woke up in my hotel bed at 6:30 this morning, which is sleeping in for me. Swan gave me a Coke Zero to drink, and I asked her where it came from. She said we stopped at the 7-Eleven on the way to the room. How did we get back? She said we took a trike. It’s all a blank page; the last thing I remember is being at the beer garden. Apparently, we didn’t leave the beer garden until around ten p.m., an hour past my bedtime.

A long day with too much of a good thing and higher-potency beer didn’t help matters. I’m glad I didn’t do anything stupid, and December 7 will not be my personal day of infamy.

I only remember twelve beers. Who knows what happened after that?

Five years ago, I was attending my first-ever Haggis Hash, this one in La Union:

The haggis before it was cooked. I eat it and try not to think about where it comes from. Tastes alright, but I’ll never crave it. Maybe I’m not of Scottish heritage after all.

In today’s YouTube video, the Filipina Pea takes the 4B movement to task. Funny to see a Filipina point out the ignorance of women who think they are better than her.

And some humor:

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!
I’d tell her no, but I can do you doggy-style
It’s all in the stars

Back home again and embarking on the Sunday routines, starting with the Hideaway feeding. Then, I’ll be treating Swan to Sunday dinner at John’s Place. Then we shall see. No beer tonight; that’s a promise!

Back to my Scottish roots

Such as they are. Greetings from the Haggis Hash! The event is being held at the farm of our Hasher host here in Pozzorubio, and day one was very nicely done. A full day of Hashing and drinking (but I repeat myself) lies ahead, so I’m going to just slap up some photos from yesterday as I need to hurry and prepare myself for today’s adventure.

Back for the second time
We completed our registration and received the gift bags, including a new Hash shirt.
Camping out is an option I have no interest in, but quite a few folks took advantage of the opportunity.
My dad always said we were Scotch-Irish.
We even have our own clan. My branch added an “e” somewhere along the way
He hopes to be a man again.
The Subic Bay Hash House Harriers contingent
The Hare providing last minute guidance before the hiking commences
And we are On-On!
Yesterday’s trail was only 5K and mostly flat, just what I like! Longer options are in store for today
Into the unknown. There is an element of excitement in being in a new environment.
Some wide open spaces
A tree I liked
The first cookie delivery of the day
A walk on the not-so-wild side
Walk towards the light!
Lollipops for these two
The only dicey bridge crossing of the day
Reminded me of my Arizona days
Bringing some sweetness to their day
Swan was feeling a little corny
The back way
A Thai outpost?
Turns out this is a resort where some Hashers are staying. Strangely, I didn’t see any signage.
There were three or four drink stops along the way. I took a pass–I try to keep my walkaholic life separate from my alcoholic one.
Falling behind
Through the fields we go
No hill climbs yesterday. We’ll see what happens today.
Rural beauty
The trail ended here.
Beer and an empanada snack awaited our arrival.
Cloud cover
I *think* this is a mango grove
The trail we walked.

Then it was back to the farmstead for the Haggis Hash circle.

You can’t have a farm without a windmill, right?
Circle up!
Bagpipes to kick off the event
They don’t do ice here, but they do have punishments
These gals didn’t wear Hash attire, so they were paraded around the circle, and we voted for the hottest one.
I found her to have the best ASSets.
A fire to light the circle
And then dinner was served—a pork stew. I had mine without the rice. The Haggis will be served tonight.

San Miguel Zero beer was not available, so I had to go with the stronger and more caloric San Mig Light. I drank my money’s worth again, and then we found a trike to take us back to our hotel.

Oops! Well, I am on vacation after all.

Okay, I got to get ready, so no memories, YouTube, or bad jokes today. Sorry!

Before I go

In a rush this morning before my departure for the weekend adventure at the Haggis Hash up north in Pangasinan. The low down on yesterday was taking Swan on her longest hike yet…nearly 10K. The best moment for me was when she told me she had been ready to quit as we walked uphill on the highway at about the 6K point, but once we started strolling along the riverside, it was fun again. We finished up at a restaurant in Calapandayan we’ve been wanting to try and enjoyed our meals and the view.

Heading out. Swan knew we were going to Subic town but didn’t know we were going the back way, which is about twice as far.
These are customers from our Sunday Candy Walk. The mother asked Swan to be a Godmother to her baby, and Swan agreed to do so.
Can you see the cabin in the woods?
Flowers are on de vine!
These are pretty, too
It had been months since Swan passed this way, but that kid (see him?) saw her and came running
Swan did some heavy lifting on this hike
Rice fields are ready for planting
Over Bridge #4
River crossing
The ass side of Easter Mountain
The road where Swan began to lose her enthusiasm for the hike
Still a long way to go
Getting it done
Be grateful for all that you have
On the riverside
Coming to a beach near me soon
What a coincidence. Both were born in January 1958, and both died this past week. Both are younger than me, too. RIP.
Can you guess what I read when I first saw this sign?
Off the highway and into an alley for a much more serene walk
A narrow passage back to the highway
And then lunch at Ezekiels
It was good with my girlfriend, too
Bayside views
Bayside living
Bayside dining
As seen from our table
Some of the menu selections
Carbonaro for Swan
She seemed to enjoy it
I did the honey garlic chicken wings and found them quite tasty.
I shared the bones with a stray cat under our table
The route we took

Later in the day, we paid a rare visit to Cheap Charlies. I reasoned that I could get a fairly priced gin and soda, and if we got hungry, we could order some food from Foodies, the restaurant on the ground floor. And that is just what we did!

It had been a long time since I enjoyed a delicious bowl of beef stew.

Swan ordered something called Kare Kare, a Filipino stew. I forgot to get a photo. Sorry!

A view from Cheap Charlies

We did our nightcap at Wet Spot, where I enjoyed chatting with the owner, Daddy Dave.

Another day under plan

A little bit of a disappointment at this morning’s weigh-in: 245.2, down only three ounces since December 1. Overall, I’ve lost 21.9 pounds since beginning the diet on November 1. In more positive signs, my belly circumference is down an inch to 48 and two inches off the waist to 44. I’m getting there.

Here is how I looked fifty years ago:

I reckon those days are gone forever. At least until God grants my “do-over” request.

Gotta skip the YouTube video today…no time!

That was a speedy trip
At least you didn’t lose your rein, dear boy.
What a crusher!

Okay, I need to pack up the laptop, as my ride will be arriving shortly. I’ll post updates during the weekend as time allows.

Castillejos loop de las loonies

The Wednesday Walkers took a long thirty-minute Jeepney ride out to Castillejos and proceeded to do an almost 8K stroll on the backroads of town. It’s almost crazy the lengths we will go to in order to see some relatively new scenery. There, I made this post title somewhat sensible now, right? Here are some photos from our journey:

Exiting the Jeepney
Posing for the group shot
Let the roadwork begin
Are we having fun yet?
I’ve been known to worship light beer
Govic Highway, let me slip away on you…
The wide open road
A more pleasant stretch of road
A horny carabao
Faking a leg injury
Dirt is better than pavement for walking
Taking in the view
Marching on
Saluting the Wednesday Walkers
A peaceful village of shanties
Country living
The way ahead seems peaceful enough
Nature’s arch
In Flanders fields?
This pink teddy appears to be escaping
And then we came upon this huge, vacant, haunted-looking mansion. I’d love to know the story behind this.
Always look both ways before crossing
We had planned to conclude our hike with lunch at Mad Willies. Alas, the hours have changed and now they don’t open until noon.
But we had the good fortune to catch a passing Victory Liner bus for the ride back to Barretto. Air-conditioned comfort is much better than a Jeepney for only 20 pesos more.
We wound up having our lunch and liquid refreshments at It Doesn’t Matter. It’s all good!
We went thataway!

Swan and I spent a good portion of our Wednesday evening at BarCelona.

The view from our regular perch
Looks like Mama has a homeless friend
My date
Me and my date
Who cut the fart?
Then we moved out to the rooftop area
The space between By The Sea and Central Park Reef resorts
Looking up the highway
And looking down the highway
A colorful sky

We had our nightcap downstairs at Green Room. We shared a table with my friend Tom, who regaled me with stories from the good ol’ days in Barretto (he’s been here for twenty-five years). It’s tame here by comparison to what he termed “the Wild West,” when things were a lot crazier. I’ll take it the way it is, thank you very much.

We ordered our dinner to take out from Sit-n-Bull.

The options for a dieter exclude my usual favorites. I had these ham slices with a side of coleslaw.

But you do what you gotta do, right?

I did manage to come in under my target goal

I’ll do my weekly weigh-in in the morning. The last pair of shorts I bought had a size 42 waist. When I loosened my belt as I prepared for bed, the shorts dropped to the floor, still fully buttoned. I’ll take that as a good sign!

Today’s memory is the view from my apartment window in Seoul twelve years ago:

That’s snow, not fog. And speaking of fog, I’m not sure if that’s from my apartment or not. It doesn’t look familiar to me now. Plus, I think we were higher up. Oh well.

Today’s YouTube video gives a glimpse of life in Barretto in 1992 when it was still the “Wild West.”

And the daily dose of humor:

Hey, I resemble that remark!
It’s more than a feeling
That pun crashed on takeoff. Sorry!

I’m not sure what’s in store for this evening, but tomorrow morning, I’ll be heading to Pozorrubio in the province of Pangasinan to participate in this year’s running of the Haggis Hash. It’s always good to get out of town for a change of pace. Don’t worry, I’ll be posting my lame crap from there so my loyal reader(s) won’t miss out on the fun!

And the “first time hearing” video:

Dethroned again

I did my weekly grocery shopping at Royal yesterday, but I wasn’t royalty. Yes, I had lost my crown. Well, not technically lost; it had fallen off while I was flossing. At least I didn’t swallow it. So, after shopping, I visited my dentist. The crown isn’t in the best of shape, and the stub of my tooth doesn’t provide much room for grounding, but Dr. Barrera agreed to reattach it and see what happens. So, I left forty-five minutes later with a freshly glued crown, feeling like a king again. Then I took a 5K stroll amongst the peasants to celebrate having one less hole in my head.

My mouth was still numb when I finished the walk, though.

After the usual R&R at home, the gal and me did our Tuesday on Baloy Beach thing.

I baked this batch of brownies to bring along for the Kokomo’s floating bar crew
Arriving on Baloy
The happy place for Swan
Toes in the sand and a smile on her face
Ready to be ferried to our watery destination
Not real crowded but a couple of big spenders were on board
Wine for Swan, gin and soda for me
The best part of the day
Nice seeing you again
Hasta la vista!

So, they’ve hired a bunch of new girls, some of them quite attractive. Whenever an unattached male came aboard, the girls swarmed him like hungry mosquitos. But they were not overly aggressive and graciously accepted the “no thank you” response. The music was loud, but the playlist was good. I reckon I can handle my once-a-week visits here satisfactorily. The views make it all worthwhile.

When it was time to eat, we went ashore and ordered dinner at Treasure Island.

The floating bar and the sliver of a moon as seen from Treasure Island
This chef salad filled the void in my stomach nicely

A bit of a hiccup on the way home. The peanut vendor I have helped out occasionally messaged that he was unable to restock his peanut tray because all his funds had been used for medical expenses. Well, I respect the fact that Emmanuel works hard selling his wares in the bars of Barretto rather than resorting to begging on the streets. So, I agreed to help him out and told him to meet me at 7-Eleven at 7:30. I had the trike driver stop there on our way home, but there was no Emmanuel. He had messaged earlier that he was on his way, so we paid the trike and waited for him at SnackBar. He got there about ten minutes late, and I lit into him. He said he had walked from his home in Subic, and I gruffly said that he should have left earlier. I told him it was extremely rude to ask for money and then not be on time to receive it. Yeah, I was being an asshole, and it might have been the gin talking. Anyway, I messaged an apology this morning, and he thanked me. So, all is well.

Maybe the end of NEXT year…
A decent effort with the calorie intake yesterday

“The past beats inside of me like a second heart.” I saw that on Facebook this morning, and it seemed like a nice introduction to today’s installment of memories. Just this one from eight years ago:

I saw this somewhere on the streets of Seoul and liked it. You can also see my skinny reflection in the glass.

I’m seeing a slew of videos about expats regretting their move to the Philippines. Today’s video features a well-spoken Filipina giving her thoughts on the subject. I honestly don’t let things like the “skin tax” bother me, and there are easy enough workarounds. My major complaints, like noise and litter, aren’t enough to make me want to leave. I just remember my mantra: Take a deep breath. Relax. Accept the Filipino way.

Laughing can help, too:

No candy, cakes, pies, or ice cream for me these days.
WTF
That’s what I just said, mother fucker!

Anyhoo, I’m a lucky man enjoying the mundane lifestyle I’ve adopted. I can tell my boring drivel is tortuous for my readers; my current stats say I’ve lost about half of my blog visitors over the past few months. Thanks to the rest of you for sticking around. If you have any suggestions for things you’d like me to write about, feel free to let me know in the comments.

Doesn’t bother me

I guess I’ve reached the stage of my Hash career where I shortcut without shame. The Hash should be something I enjoy, not a chore. Yesterday was no exception. The Hare’s laid a good and well-marked trail, but when it was time to climb up to the Black Rock ridge, the like-minded Hash group and I opted to go longer and flatter. And it worked out just fine that way.

The trail started at the VFW and passed through Alta Vista. So, I waited here. Bug Fucker was the first Hasher to appear, but I hung around until the group who hike at my pace came by.
And here they come now
The neighborhood German has “Sans Souci” on the wall of his residence, which resolves the mystery of the words the Hares left on the pole nearby.
Almoranus, the German Hare for yesterday’s trail, confirmed the message was intended for the dwelling’s occupant. “A pleasure palace without worry,” indeed!
Out of the ‘hood we go
Over the river on Bridge #3
The river I mentioned
We were pretty much retracing the Candy Walk route so far.
Entering San Isidro’s Purok 3
Pubic Head’s shot of Easter Mountain
The way up to the Black Rock ridge. This is where we parted company with the Hare’s trail.
We did a nice flat valley walk instead
Up top there is where we did not tread
The Black Rock
We did do one climb up some steps and rejoined the Hare’s trail where it came down from Black Rock.
On-On!
That’s always a welcome sign
Onward we tread
Swan waiting on her slowpoke man
And then down we go
My Easter Mountain shot
It better be!
On the Govic Highway
Arriving at our On-Home venue at last!
I enjoy the outdoor ambiance here
Cums Alone, as last week’s Hashit recipient, prepares to pass it on
The honor was bestowed on Buddy Fucker’s Wet Spot this week.
As is our custom, some of the Hashers gathered at IDM when the Hash was over.
The “hard” portion of the trail is in red, and the “long” part is in yellow. Us flatlanders had an 8K journey.

A better day on the diet journey as well.

I limited myself to “only” ten beers.

Weather is warming up here again, but nine years ago I was experiencing this:

Snow on the streets of Seoul

And eight years ago, my still undiagnosed lung issues had me hocking up phlegm all night long.

Things are so much better for me now!

For today’s YouTube video, we’ll have a little fun with Mikey Bustos. He’s such a Filipino!

And here’s some more fun:

Easy mistake to make
I think you’ve got that backwards
Not if he jumps out the Windows

Okay, thanks for dropping by. I’ll be back with more tomorrow.

I’m not sure how anyone would not have heard this song long ago, but these guys claim this is their “first time hearing” reaction:

The first day of the week…

…was also the first day of the month. Otherwise, it was pretty much like every Sunday around here. I’m not complaining; keep ’em comin’!

Heading out for another Candy Walk. We took our biggest load yet, 250 bags of sweets. We needed two full backpacks and two big handbags to carry it all. We’ve reached maximum capacity.
The first regular stop
What has its gots in its bagses? (get the reference?)
The beauty of nature. The flowers are lovely, too.
They are coming for you, Swan
These are my favorites. Very polite. A hug and a blessing (putting your hand on their forehead) before taking the candy and then thanking you profusely.
I thought they knew each other. Nope. A random stranger trying to sell Swan some property in the neighborhood.
A big bushy bunch of blossoms but no bees
Taking a piss while pretending to be taking in the view
It began like this
And they just kept on coming. The last of the candy bags was dispensed here, but luckily, I had some cookies and lollipops in the backpack to fill in the gap.
At the foot of the mountain we call Easter
Reflecting during the trike ride home
Another Sunday, another 5K Candy Walk. A record-breaking 250+ dispensations this week.

The Hideaway feeding was also pretty much standard fare. There’s a new girl working now, so that’s one more mouth to feed. I was surprised to see the bar was packed, even without a pool league match. That’s a good sign. One of the other customers was an old acquaintance who lives in San Antonio. It was nice to see him again after many months.

The Joy of eating

Speaking of eating, it was time for my Sunday dinner date with Swan.

The cloud cover marred the usual sunset view
So, I zoomed in on the Christmas decorations across the street instead.

We were once again the only customers at John’s place, but the service and food quality remained up to John’s high standards.

I was tempted by the birria tacos but couldn’t justify the high-calorie content. Instead, I opted for the pulled pork sandwich (sans bread). Next time, I’ll order it without the bread, so I don’t waste a bun.
And I had a side salad instead of fries.

We did our nightcap at Wet Spot. Things went a tad overboard when a customer bought me a drink, and shortly after that, the bar comped me one. I suppose it is better to be fat than rude, so naturally, I accepted the generous gestures. It was a gin and soda night, and my comfort zone with that drink is limiting myself to six beverages. The two freebies put me at eight for the night. I was slightly buzzed but in control of my faculties.

My Wet Spot drinking companions. Yes, Aine and Swan have made up.

And this is the price I paid for my over zealousness:

A gin (85 calories) too far.

Today is the seventh anniversary of my longest walk.

I remain hopeful that I can achieve 50,000 steps once more in this lifetime.

It’s been a while since we last checked in with Reekay. Today’s YouTube video takes on the “real women” of the West and their unfavorable views of Asian women, who many men find much more desirable. I didn’t technically move to the PI for the women, although I obviously enjoy the unique qualities that come with a good-hearted Filipina. It just took me way too long to find the right one for me.

And maybe these will put a smile on your face:

I’m getting older, but I ain’t old yet. At least not in my mind.
Never really thought of it that way before. And yes, that misspelling of “you’re” is a tad irritating, even for someone like me.
A pig in a poke?

And now it is Hash Monday once again.

And as I observed on today’s dog walk, the trail passes through Alta Vista.

Vienna Sausage is the Hare once again, and I’m unsure what his message in German on that pole is supposed to mean. Google Translate gives me this: Pleasure Palace Frederick the Rough Sanssouci, which makes about as much sense as not shortcutting his trails. In fact, I’m going to start from Alta Vista instead of the VFW, and I’ll likely consider my safety and comfort as I determine how much of the rest of his trail is worthy of my time. I’ll let you know how that goes tomorrow.

As far as it goes

The day didn’t go exactly as planned, but it came and went, and I lived to tell you about it. Here goes.

Swan left the house early in the morning to assist with a charity event in Cawag, Subic. So, I walked the dogs alone and then came up with the idea to see how far I could walk me. I had it in mind to see if I could make 15K, so I plotted a course that included walking the length of the GOVIC highway (around 7K) and then either continuing on from there or walking back towards Barretto as far as my tired old legs would take me. Around the four-kilometer mark, I realized that my good intentions wouldn’t carry me as far as I had hoped. So, I changed course and headed back. I’ll try the long walk again another day.

At 1.6K, I found myself just beginning the Govic Highway journey. Weekend traffic (this picture is deceiving) made it less than pleasant, which was a factor in my decision to bail.
A 3.2K, I was rounding a bend in the road and seeing a familiar mountain ahead.
At 4.8K, I had bailed on the highway walk and taken refuge in the wide-open spaces, comforting myself in the knowledge that each step was one step closer to home.
6.4K found me on the streets of the Saint James neighborhood in Calapacuan.
At 8K, I was back at the beginning of Govic Highway. That trike stand proved irresistible, so my morning hike ended here.
My route was half of what I hoped it might be. Perhaps next time I’ll be in a better frame of mind.

Next on my agenda was a supposed birthday party at Kokomo’s scheduled to begin at 5 p.m. We got to Baloy a tad early, so we visited Laharnyz for a drink and beach views.

The view from Laharnyz

Then we strolled up the beach to Kokomo’s.

Sand, water, mountains, and sunshine
That beach of mine
I’ve never seen a Subic sand sculpture before. Nicely done!

So, we get to Kokomo’s, and the beach bar is decorated, but there is no sign of the birthday girl. The floating bar is also decorated with balloons, so we figured that must be where the action is.

Kokomo’s had more guests than I’ve seen before. Mostly Filipinos, except for one table of foreigners.

The floating bar was also busy, but the birthday gal wasn’t there either. Cakes and a tray of food indicated that this was indeed the party venue.

This sailboat dropped anchor, and the crew rafted over to the floating bar. For some reason, the girls came running. It turns out they like to buy lady drinks.
And then the sun did its thing

We stayed for two drinks, and there was no indication there would be a party other than the food, cakes, and balloons. I’d had enough waiting, so we caught the raft back to shore. There was some loud videoke “music” taking place at Kokomo’s, and that was enough for me to just keep walking. We caught a trike to Green Room and spent the rest of the evening there.

It wasn’t the Saturday I had in mind, but it turned out okay regardless.

And I stuck with the plan

It’s De(cline)cember now, which makes my new lower-calorie lifestyle one month old. I marked the occasion with a weigh-in:

  • December 1: 245.5
  • November 1: 267.1
  • Weight loss: 21.6 pounds

Not a bad start. Now to keep it going!

Facebook took me back in time to 1974:

The Ringwraiths were the Westminster, California, recreation league softball champions
I have a hunch the 70s were more fun than my 70s are going to be.

Five years ago, the Cheap Charlies gals welcomed me home after my Korea vacation:

They are all gone now, and I rarely visit this bar anymore.

Today’s YouTube video has a tongue-in-cheek look at five dangers associated with dating a Filipina. I say it is worth taking the chance!

Your daily dose of humor:

Did he have both hands on your shoulders during the exam?
Don’t be a dick about it, just go ahead and boner.
A Honda is nothing to brag about anyway.

And now, to prepare for the rest of my Sunday. A Hideaway feeding is on tap, followed by dinner with Swan at John’s place. Then we shall see what happens next. Read all about it here tomorrow!

This song popped up in my memories, too. It is still a joy to watch!

What the hell? Okay, you can watch it on YouTube if you want. Damn it.

So, here’s another oldie but goodie:

From the mountain to the sea

And a grave descent in between.

It was one of the nicer group hikes we’ve done in a while. It started with a Jeepney ride three kilometers out of town. Then we climbed to Kalaklan Ridge once again, and we all agreed that this was one of the easier (but not easy) ways to get up there. Next, we had a very pleasant walk along the ridgeline path before beginning our downward journey to the beach via the Olongapo hillside graveyard. I haven’t ventured through all those above-ground tombs in ages, but the views are to die for (sorry!). I checked out some of the gravestones as we passed and was a little surprised that the majority I saw were born after me, and it made me feel both lucky and old. When we reached the beach, I was relieved that the tide was relatively low. The last time I attempted this beach walk I reached a dead end when the waves were crashing into the rocky shoreline blocking my path. We still had to do some wading yesterday, but we found a way around and walked the beach all the way back to Barretto. Good times!

On our way to the meet-up
Friday’s hike participants
Let the climbing begin
The fat guy is bringing up the rear, as usual
Onward and upward
Looking back down from whence we started
Burn those calories!
Almost to the top
Enjoying the relative flatness of walking the ridgeline
People do live up here. It appears to be a hard life.
First cookie delivery of the day
At the upper reaches of the graveyard
The view from here
Felt like I was auditioning for a part in The Walking Dead
I’ve never seen a cemetery like this one
No one is really buried here
Sadly, none of the residents can enjoy the view as much as we did.
This is the oldest birth date I saw here. A plaque said he served in the US Navy during World War I. So, he lived under Spanish, American, and Japanese rule and lived to see the Philippines gain its independence. What a life!
The whole family is together here
Across the highway and down to the beach
With a brief stop to see the lighthouse
Cookie delivery on the beach!
There’s a way around
They say no man is an island, but a fisherMAN can be…
Flower power
I tried not to step on any
This is where I got blocked last time…
Gary is descending rocks the hard way
It wasn’t the last time we got our feet wet yesterday
Told ya!
Another delivery
In the village of Bantay Bayan. Thinking of owning this place and living an isolated lifestyle is a fun fantasy. I’d call it “The Rite Spot On The Beach.”
I can see Easter Mountain from here
Filipino graffiti
And now an interlude on some wide-open beaches
A brief rest stop at Kon-Tiki
Then on with the beach walk
Until the sand turns to rock
There were two options: over the rocks or in the water. You can see how people voted with their feet.
I did both
Scott chose the wet route
Back in Barretto and passing the The Floating Island Resort
The final delivery of the hike
Finishing our hike on the highway
Just shy of 7K beginning to end

But I wasn’t done with the beach yet. After some rest and recovery at home, Swan and I headed for Baloy.

The beach that is Baloy
And there’s that toes in the sand smile
Where else are we gonna go?
Rock me on the water
Good times!
Not much of a sunset with the cloud cover, so this will have to do.

Kokomo’s owner, Steve, is back from his brief visit to his Australian motherland, and we had a pleasant visit. There were only a couple of other customers this time, but the girls occasionally got up and danced anyway.

The Kokomo’s crew strutting their stuff. Sorry for the crappy photo.

I had initially planned to grab a bite to eat somewhere other than Treasure Island for a change, but once we were back on the sand, I went with the easy option.

It really is the best place on Baloy overall.

Neither of us was in the mood for a big meal, so we went with one order of chicken wings.

That’s the sixteen-piece serving. I had three, Swan had four, and the rest came home for the helpers to enjoy.
And I’m back on track and staying under budget
Not a bad day’s work.

I’ll just leave this here:

About damn time!

Today’s YouTube video comes from the Pea, and it’s a good one. It discusses the differences between women of the West and the East. I voted with my feet long ago. Give it a watch and see what you think.

Humor time:

For the record, I have no such secrets. And I’ve been to Thailand.
I don’t know about that. And I’m a lesbian trapped in a man’s body.
That pun is of Biblical proportions.

Okay, there is a birthday celebration for the wife of the Kokomo’s owner later today, so we’ll be heading back to Baloy Beach again. Life is good.

A feast for the eyes

You can’t taste the goodness of the Thanksgiving gathering at The Rite Spot, but at least you can see how it looked.

The meats: ham, chicken, and turkey, before being chopped up and moved to the roof. There are also mashed potatoes, candied yams, bread, as well as a lasagna that one of the guests provided.
Turkey ready for eating
Sliced ham
Chopped up chicken
Swan’s green bean casserole
Mashed potatoes
Carrots and potato
A cake provided by a guest. We also had pumpkin, pecan, and apple pies

I apparently neglected to photograph the fruit salad and candied yams. There was also dressing and gravy.

I wasn’t sure how many to expect. I put the word out; some acknowledged it, while others kept their options open. A couple I was expecting messaged later that they couldn’t attend. I told folks we’d start drinking at three and eating around four, but not many people were present when we kicked off the feast. I figured we’d have plenty of leftovers, but some members of Swan’s family showed up later (that’s how Filipino time works), and we filled the seats.

Time to eat
The chow line
My plate with a little bit of everything and some fruit salad on the side. I enjoyed gnawing on a drumstick for the first time in years. Hey, I wouldn’t have moved to the Philippines if I didn’t like dark meat!
As usual, the gals sat at their own table.
The mom’s and kids gathered here
Time passed, and the sun faded away
It should come as no surprise that karaoke broke out
Swan worked her ass off in the kitchen and did a great job. She was having fun on the roof with friends and family
A couple of Swan’s nieces
Rockin’ on into the night
Checking the status of the food tables
The meats and lasagna took big hits
And so did the sides
People all over the world love my Aunt Pat’s recipe fruit salad
The candied yams had a few fans, too
Mercy loved the yams so much that she wanted to bring some home.

We had bought some takeout containers to give away whatever leftovers remained. Quite a few folks brought the sides and desserts home with them when the party ended. My one-day reprieve from the diet was over and I didn’t need any temptations hanging around the house.

During the festivities, I downed a record-setting fourteen bottles of San Miguel Zero beer. The leftovers won’t be much of a temptation because I rarely drink at home unless I have guests to entertain.

And now for the damage done:

Good thing I didn’t go back for seconds. Except for the pecan pie.

Back on track today. No breakfast and a 7K hike that included another climb up to the Kalaklan Ridge. I weighed myself just now, and I’m at 246.6, DOWN one pound from yesterday. Go figure.

Anyway, it turned out to be a nice gathering, and I enjoyed hanging out with the guys and downing lots of beers. I’m thankful for that opportunity.

Facebook memories presented a video I posted twelve years ago of me playing in the finals of a dart tournament: “Finals of 11/17/2012 KDF tourney in Seoul featuring Alister “All-Star” Tarbett (Scotland) versus John “The Walrus” McCrarey (USA). Best of 5 501 legs. John took the first two legs, Alister came back to take the next two, setting up a classic showdown in the final leg.”

Spoiler alert: I won

Today’s YouTube video advises avoiding ten common mistakes retired expats make. I’ve made some of these, but after more than six years here, I’ve learned to avoid most self-inflicted problems.

Today’s dose of humor:

My body, my choice
The other guy appears to be stone cold sober
When I want to engage in self-reflection, I look in the mirror

Okay, what’s next? I’m skipping the SOB this week in favor of a relaxing evening on Baloy Beach. I guess I’m just In The Mood.

Happy Turkey Day!

May your blessings on this day of giving thanks be plentiful.

Busy morning getting ready for the Thanksgiving gathering on the rooftop. My last portion of the feast to prepare is the candied yams, but I’m waiting for the oven to free up. Turkey is done, but now it’s the chicken’s turn to get roasted.

Turkey basted Gordon Ramsey-style with Swan’s loving touch and into the oven.
Three hours later, the thermometer says the turkey is done
Looks ready to eat to me
It ought to go good with these berries that I bought

Meanwhile, up on the roof:

The new Rite Spot banner is hung
Tables are arranged
Beer is waiting for ice (there’s another cooler with wine, soju, and liquor for the gals)
And there is always The Rite Spot view

Three more hours until guests start arriving, so I’ll share some of my yesterday. The Wednesday Walkers took a two Jeepney (blue and red) ride out to Olongapo City’s Gordon Heights barangay. There’s a road to the top of Kalaklan Ridge (half paved, half dirt), and we took it. It was a 1.6K uphill trek to the ridgeline. I don’t know why, but road climbs, especially straight ones, kick my ass more than trails. Once at the top, we had the usual amazing views that made the struggle worth it. Getting down was a bit of a challenge, too, because the grass was thick and high, making it hard to stay on the trail. We fought our way through and had an overall enjoyable hike.

First, the blue Jeepney from Barretto into Olongapo, then this red ride up to Gordon Heights
We have arrived
This week’s iteration of the Wednesday Walkers (plus Scott, the cameraman)
And so it begins
Hadn’t been by here in quite some time. Back when I was a tourist, and then the first year after I moved here, this was my primary charity recipient. In time, I became convinced that my efforts were better directed elsewhere.
On up
And up some more
The pavement ended but we still had a ways to go
Ridgeline achieved, It’s time for a rest, right, Scott?
Hello down there, Barretto
The blue waters of the bay. The old Hanjin shipyard will soon be reopened under new ownership.
I didn’t forget you, Easter Mountain
Lollipops for the mountain children
Braver than I am
View finders
Another vantage point
The view from here
And now, the struggle to get back down begins
I’ve walked this way many times, but never experienced the grass being this thick
Made for some tough going, but we made it through
Rolly’s place. One of our regular stops on the way down from the ridge
See you next time, Rolly!
On down!
Through the hillside village above Abra Street
Back on the pavement in Barretto
Up, over, and down the other side

I told Swan I was treating her to dinner at Sit-n-Bull (I had a 15% discount coupon I needed to use) and asked if she wanted to have a drink before dinner. She said she did. So, Outback, BarCelona, or Sloppy Joe’s to start? As I expected, she answered “Outback” without hesitation. It has beach views.

We don’t come here often, but it is a nice view
Cheers!
The Outback pool bar
Time passages

And then off to dinner.

Kare-Kare, a Filipino dish Swan enjoyed.
I did the Salisbury steak with mushroom gravy, but I f’d up on the baked beans side dish. It had way more calories than I imagined. Oh well, it’s a warm-up for today’s coming ingestion.

A nightcap at Wet Spot, then home for a good night’s sleep before the big day.

Despite the beans fiasco, I managed to come in under my daily budget

Speaking of which, I weighed in a day early so I could assess the damage of the Thanksgiving cheat.

  • Today’s weight: 247.6
  • Last week: 248.6
  • November 1: 267.1
  • Net loss: 19.5 pounds

Belly is still 49″ circumference. Waist is down to 43.

Meanwhile, back in the kitchen:

Swan’s sister arrived early to help out
Chickens are done
My first attempt at candied yams. I’ll withhold judgment until I see how they taste.

Looking back to ten years ago, I was alone in Columbia, South Carolina for Thanksgiving. That didn’t stop me from preparing a feast:

You gotta do what you gotta do…

Today’s YouTube video carries us back to the first Thanksgiving and dispels the so-called myths surrounding this American tradition.

And give thanks for these jokes:

You are such a turkey sometimes, Gump!
I hate when that happens!
Holiday cheer to cum!

Anyway, time to get ready to greet the guests who will be arriving soon. Oh, I almost forgot, we had an earthquake this morning.

I was up and around but never felt a thing. Another Thanksgiving blessing!

Okay, Happy Thanksgiving to both of my readers. I will give you a full report on the celebration and feast tomorrow.

And surely you knew this would be the song of the day:

Thanksgiving Eve

A busy day ahead as I make final preparations for tomorrow’s feast. It’s been seven years since I last attempted to prepare a Thanksgiving dinner, and I’m thankful Swan is here to assist. One of my chores today will be trying a dry brine recipe helpfully provided by a commenter. Thank you, Mr. Kim! I’m also attempting a candied yams recipe I found online. I hope it tastes as good as the one Mom used to make. I’ve already got my Aunt Pat’s recipe fruit salad chillin’ in the fridge. An apple pie is in the oven, so while that’s baking, I’ll share a little about my yesterday.

As usual, I start my Tuesday by baking up a batch of muffins. I don’t get to partake these days, but my housemates, driver, and “mama” enjoy them.

Cranberry-Orange this time

Next up was a trip to Royal for the weekly grocery shopping adventure. This time, the cart was overflowing with the extra goodies I purchased for the upcoming big meal.

We definitely ain’t going hungry, diet or not.
Spend it if you got it
This meat thermometer set me back $7.50. I’ve never used one before, but it’s recommended when baking a turkey.
I’m also excited to report that I found cranberry sauce in a can! And it is the whole berry style I prefer. I’m so Thankful!

In keeping with my No! vember objectives, I engaged in my newest Tuesday routine–a neighborhood walk after shopping.

For you Easter Mountain fans
Another view from the ‘hood
A 4K stroll. And this time, I turned RIGHT.

Renewing an old Tuesday tradition, Swan and I took a walk out to Baloy Beach late in the afternoon.

The view on arrival at Baloy
Toes in the sand puts a smile on her face every time.
Our objective, the Kokomo’s floating bar, is in sight
A view of Kalaklan Ridge from the floater. I wound up climbing that MF’er this morning.
What the hell, did a plane crash?
Why do they call it pair a sailing when there is only one? (sorry!)
Another gin night
I prefer beer, but you got to do what you got to do
Swan asked why I never smile in our photos
Is that better?
You knew this was coming.
Actually, it’s going
And now it’s gone
It’s cloud illusions I recall
The bright spot on the beach is our dinner destination–Treasure Island Resort

A nice evening on the floating bar. Not as crowded as Saturday was, but still a good crowd for a Tuesday. Certainly better than the Kokomo’s beach bar ever does.

See you next week!
You win this time, Santa
With that girl what lives in my house (that’s me talkin’ Southern, y’all)
A nice ambiance at TI
Chicken cordon bleu for Swan
And beef enchiladas for me.

Man does not live by salad alone. I only ate one enchilada last night (350 calories) and one for lunch today. And I’m still skipping breakfast, which is a bit of a surprise; I didn’t think I had the willpower to ignore those morning hunger pangs. I’ve discovered they go away if you ignore them long enough.

Not a bad day, if I do say so myself

Meanwhile, in the kitchen:

Before it was fruit salad
And after
The apple pie is safely out of the oven now. Everybody doesn’t like something, but nobody doesn’t like Sara Lee. Yes, I baked a frozen pie.

And I had these two beauties delivered:

Pumpkin and pecan. I am so going to blow my diet tomorrow!

And here is the result of my first time trying brine on a turkey:

Brine applied in accordance with this recipe. Swan suggested I add some garlic, and so I did.

I’ll add a butter-based glaze with additional seasonings before I pop the turkey in the oven early tomorrow morning.

Next up on my agenda is the candied yams.

The recipe calls for these ingredients: yams, butter, brown sugar, cinnamon, and marshmallows. I’m adding the pecans because I’m nuts.

I’ve decided to wait until after the turkey is cooked tomorrow to make the yams. Reheating them seems fraught with peril.

Swan is still busy in the kitchen making a green bean casserole, roast potatoes, and a small ham. We’ve also got roast chicken, dressing, and mashed potatoes with gravy on the menu. Some of our guests will be bringing their favorite sides, so no one is going home hungry. We’ve also purchased some “take out” containers so we can send everyone home with leftovers. I’m only going to cheat one day!

Oh, and the old banner didn’t survive the rainy season, so this new one will be there to greet our guests at the Rite Spot tomorrow:

We’ve enlisted Swan’s sister, Chloe, to manage the assembly line bagging the candies for Sunday’s Candy Walk.

Spreading the joy

Today’s YouTube video discusses hiring a “tour guide with benefits” when visiting the Philippines. Those days are over for me, but as a tourist coming from Korea back in the day, I took this route, and for the most part, it worked well. My mistake was falling in love with my regular guide (Loraine), and that didn’t end well for me. Live and learn.

Today’s dose of humor:

My sleep score has been higher than normal lately, but I’m having some bizarre dreams.
You are Royally screwed

And it wouldn’t be Thanksgiving if I didn’t post this old gem:

I see, the blind man said as he picked up the hammer and saw.

Okay, my work here is done now. I’m going to shower up and head into town for some Thanksgiving Eve revelry. Tell you about the Wednesday Walkers and my night out tomorrow. I hope you’ll be Thankful for that!

Damn, it’s been awhile since I’ve heard from Sawyer Brown. Still love this classic:

A Bitch of a Hash

I didn’t really have a plan, but things still didn’t go the way I anticipated for yesterday’s Hash. The first decision I made was to walk to the Hash starting point from my house via the My Bitch trail. Swan and another Hasher, Fuck Buddy’s Wet Spot, joined me on the trek to the start. I gave myself an hour to get here, and that proved to be just shy of enough. While hiking on My Bitch we encountered the official Hash trail at Four Corners. Of course, it was going in the opposite direction, but I figured I’d just follow the trail in reverse until I got to the start. Except when I saw the trail made a turn and was going the same way that last week’s Hash took, I decided fuck that and kept going on the Bitch to Rizal Extension and then down from there to the start at Court Two. This caused me to arrive at the start three minutes late, and everyone was already gone. Well, I could have followed the marks and done the Hare’s trail, but instead, I chose to make my own path on the streets back to the On-Home at Red Bar. Based on the feedback I heard from other Hashers, that proved to be my best decision of the day. The trail had a long and nasty climb to Kalaklan, some of it in a creekbed, and was poorly marked in places, with even experienced Hashers losing the trail. Nope, not for me. We have the same Hare next week, so I have low expectations. Anyway, here are some photos from along my way.

Only one Bitch here, ladies!
The Easter Mountain view
Cookies and lollipops for Mountain Mama Onelia
See you on Thursday!
The view from here. That’s a big burn going up on the mountain.
Still following my lead
When we arrived at the start, no one else was here. That’s what happens when you are three minutes late.
So we became street walkers
And after making a long loop, caught up with the official trail again near the On-Home venue.
Almost there
We have arrived!
Who am I to argue?
Circle up!
And look who got the Hashit this week. (She didn’t sit on the ice because her Aunt Flo from Redlands is visiting)
That’s the first time for Cums Alone. Next week, she’ll have the honor of passing the Hashit on.

Then, there was the after-Hash gathering at IDM.

Looks like everyone is having fun.

I was hungry, and the IDM menu offerings didn’t have many low-cal options, so I went with this:

Lemon chicken nuggets. They were quite good, but I only ate half of them to keep the calorie count down make room for more beer.

So, the stats for my chosen path look like this:

It’s slow going in places on the Bitch
Sorry for the crappy map, for some reason the type I like wouldn’t load.
And here is the nightmare I avoided. No regrets!

The Hash is known as a drinking club with a running problem, so I try to honor the tradition. Also, I want to get more than my money’s worth. It was close, but I managed to stay under the daily calorie budget:

The “snacks” were ten San Mig Zeros

And now, it’s time to look back in time:

Ten years ago, I quit smoking for good. And took up vaping. That got me through the transition. I’ve been vape-free for the past couple of years.
Seven years ago, my friends Wan Jun and Becky came down from Seoul for a weekend visit to Pyeongtaek. They are still living a happy life together.

And today, Facebook slapped me with the memory of falling in love three years ago. This hiking date in San Antonio convinced me I had found “the one.” There are many photos of us snuggling up, but she has previously asked me not to post her pictures here, and I mostly try to respect her wishes. It was a great day on the mountain; I’ll never forget what might have been. Of course, things turned out alright for me when I met Swan two years later.

The trail began with these steps
And this admonishment
What the scenery was like
Good advice. But she quit on me a few months later.
And there she goes

So, yesterday’s YouTube got a positive reaction from one reader (he even shared it on his blog). Glad you enjoyed it, Kevin. I honestly didn’t know much about the jokester Mikey Bustos, but it turns out he is Filipino-Canadian and is pretty famous in North America. I’m going to be checking out some of his other work, but in the meantime, here’s his parody take on if Michael Jackson was Filipino:

Here’s some motionless humor:

It’s not the meat, it’s the motion
One of my all-time favorites. An amazing man.
Finished my Thanksgiving shopping today. Bought some extra foil to dress the turkey.

Later, I’ll be re-instating my Tuesday tradition of visiting the Kokomo’s floating bar. Hard to beat sipping a cold beverage on the water and watching the sun go down. Tell you all about it tomorrow.

Money talks, Candy Walks

Another Sunday Funday. I dropped some coin but dispelled the myth that money can’t buy happiness. We were happy putting smiles on the faces of over 200 children during our weekly Candy Walk, that’s for sure.

All our bags are packed, we’re ready to go…
The path to San Isidro is thick with grass
Our first stop is always a happy one
Entering the village of Marian Hills
Where are all the kids today?
Ah, here they are
Installing a solar light in a tree. That ought to brighten things up!
The house on a hill
Waiting patiently for our arrival
Over Bridge #3
Come and get it!
The Easter Mountain shot
Besieged
And here come lots more
A 5K morning of sweetness

But I wasn’t done spending money on Joy.

This week’s food for the Hideaway feeding
Joy feeding

And then it was time to purchase some happiness for me and my girl.

John’s gone, but the view remains
Life goes on
A pleasing bowl of bulgogi for my dinner

We had our nightcap at Green Room, and the largesse continued. Four of the girls received lady drinks, and everyone else received lollipops. Another gin and soda night, and I am starting to learn my non-beer boundaries. Whether that will stop me remains to be seen.

The last time we called our “regular” trike driver, he failed to show up as scheduled. So, we agreed we’d not bother calling him and just went to grab a ride at the trike stand. As fate would have it, our regular guy was first in line. A happy ending to the night for all!

Skipping breakfast does help with staying on the calorie budget. I skipped again this morning but was hungry, so I had an early lunch. (I woke at 5:30 and ate my first food at 9:30)

Twelve years ago, I was immersed in the best times of my Korea life.

Darts and friendships made for happy memories.

Let’s have some fun with today’s YouTube video. For some reason, I thought of this one during my visit to Hideaway Bar. I requested it be played on the big-screen TV, and everyone had a good laugh—especially the Filipinas.

That’s a good lead-in to more funny shit:

That outta work
We don’t have cougars in the PI–all the white men are too old.
Talk about a fingerbang!

Hash Monday has arrived once more. Sadly, the trail start is midway up Rizal Extension, making it a pain in the ass to get to. I have no idea where the trail goes from there, but the Hare isn’t one of my favorites, so I have low expectations. My plan is to hike the My Bitch trail from my house, then down Rizal Ext from there. Once I arrive at the start, I’ll decide whether to do the Hare’s trail or find my own way to the On-Home at Red Bar. Check back tomorrow to see how that works out for me.

The feeling is floating

Another Saturday has come and gone. We did another hike to the Subic marketplace to stock up on sweets for the upcoming Candy Walk. Nothing special about that anymore. The highlight was visiting the Kokomo’s floating bar on Baloy Beach for this season’s grand re-opening. We followed that event with dinner at Treasure Island and enjoyed listening to a band called Star Network for the first time. All in all, a good day.

The walk to the market is so routine as to be boring, so I wasn’t motivated to take many photos. But I can’t resist those funeral banners for some reason:

Romeo was seven years younger than me when he passed. Sorry to Juliet for her loss.
Thelma was four years older. Hope Louise is okay.
Mission accomplished—only fifty bucks for this week’s candy supply.
The 7.5K route we took to the market

Next up, a walk to the beach!

Saturday on the beach
Here comes our ride
It was nice to be back on the water again
I remember you!
This was by far the busiest I’ve ever seen the floater.
Looking up the beach
And looking down the beach
I baked a batch of welcome-back brownies for the brown knees
And then it was that time of day
See you next time
The lights come on…
…as darkness falls

It was good to enjoy some time on the water again. I assume it was so crowded because it was opening night and also Saturday night. Lots of big spenders were on board, plying the staff with lady drinks. Several of the gals were stumbling around drunk. It was a bit different vibe, but Tuesdays were always my Kokomo’s day, and I expect things will feel more like normal next week.

Then it was dinner time. TI has live music every Saturday, but on previous visits, it was the Engine band playing. Last night’s group featured three female singers and a different sound. I enjoyed hearing them play, which is not always the case with bar bands.

Tuning into Star Network
And the lead guitar player was awesome.
It was my gin and soda night, and I sipped my last one (#5) with dinner.
I enjoyed my low-calorie chicken breast selection very much.

A trike ride home and some sugar-free pudding to end the evening. Speaking of sugar-free, my order of sugar-free sugar was delivered yesterday:

Swan wants to use it for her cheesecake recipe. We’ll see how that works out.
Yesterday was one of my better days, diet-wise. Makes up for my overindulgence on Friday. Skipping breakfast isn’t something I thought I could do because I usually wake up hungry. And now I’ve managed to do so two days in a row!

Some memories:

Eight years ago was the last time I prepared a Thanksgiving feast at home. Had my nephew Justin, a co-worker, and some of the Shenanigans bar staff over to join me. Good times!
Seven years ago, I was living the Camp Humphreys lifestyle in Pyeongtaek.
Two years ago, I shared a Thanksgiving meal with some friends at Papagayo Resort. Sadly, Bob, the guy on the right with the tattoos, died in a motorcycle accident a few months later.

Today’s YouTube video is from a guy I’d never seen before. So many of my fellow expats seem clueless. We all have to find our way in life, and sometimes, that’s the hard way.

How about a taste of some nasty humor today?

You should hear her after a beer!
What an asshole!
You are what you eat.

Soon, I will be heading out for my usual Sunday routine. I’ll start by feeding the Hideaway girls, and then I’ll have a Sunday dinner with Swan. This was posted on Facebook:

John’s place, minus John, is still going, and as long as it is, I’ll dine there to honor his memory.

I will be back with more of my drivel tomorrow.

And the “first time hearing” video: