…and your misfortune. I mean being stranded on a desert island is one thing, but having your rescue message found by the Big Hominid means you’re screwed for sure…
Sorry, Kevin. I couldn’t resist.
That’s your mistake…
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Author Archives: John McCrarey
Why yes, yes I am
So, I came upon this link that asks the question: Are you smarter than an educator? That seems to be a pretty low bar as far as intelligence indicators go, but I took the test anyway. I was astounded when I saw just how easy the questions were. I did miss two which I attribute more to not reading carefully than to ignorance. Even so, I scored a 93%. Now get this: The average score for all 2,508 Americans taking the test was 49%; college educators scored 55%! That’s pretty damn scary.
Here’s a direct link to the test. Go ahead and take it. It will probably make you feel good about yourself. Or sad for your fellow citizens. Or both.
As God is my witness
I have a kimchi pot on my front porch. Today the doorbell rang. Jee Yeun answered the door and began conversing in Korean. Apparently two well dressed Korean men were driving by and saw the aforementioned kimchi pot and surmised correctly that a Hanguk-saram was living here. So, they wanted to stop by and share some good news.
And so they did and then they left.
The other strange event of the day is that my house is full of the wonderful smell of roasting turkey. Well, it is not strange that the house smells of poultry because I’ve had some in the oven these past couple of hours. It’s just strange that I’m making turkey this time of year I suppose. But what the hell, I’m retired and no slave to a calendar. And I like turkey.
Just another exciting day in the life here at LTG.
Two things I haven’t done this year
1. I have not posted anything here on the blog.
2. I haven’t smoked a cigarette.
So, I guess technically speaking there is now only one thing I haven’t done this year. Of those two at least. And I can live without ever smoking again. Which is actually the point of quitting, right?
I’m not going to say it’s been easy. Although truth be told quitting is easy. It’s the staying quit that’s the hard part. But I’m chock full of good intentions this time. I still get the urge to smoke of course, especially when I’m alone or with somebody. Ha ha, I love my sense of humor! But seriously, there are moments when I really want to inhale some nicotine. Like while I’m writing this post. Or when I’m playing darts. And so when I’m feeling an overwhelming need, I reach out to my new best friend for comfort:
Is that cheating? Who cares? Yes, it’s a nicotine fix. But it ain’t the nicotine that is scarring my lungs. And it’s really just a crutch until I can walk away completely on my own. And I’m getting there.
Speaking of walking, I’ve rededicated myself to six hours a week on the treadmill. So far, so good. It’s just been a few days but I do feel better already. I do the treadmill in the morning and an hour of darts practice in the afternoon. Usually with a nap in between. It’s a pretty sweet routine.
In other news, I did my first dart tourney of the year this past weekend up in Charlotte. I threw better than I usually do, and even managed to to finish in the money.
With my partner J.R. we managed a Top 8 finish in 501 and a Top 4 finish in Cricket.
And that’s about all I’ve got to say about 2014. At least so far. It did start well though.
I’m wearing my bomber jacket! Ready for Itaewon!
Happy New Year!
That’s Life
My journey through the annals of Life continues apace. The magazine that is. I’ve now reached August 1955, the month and year of my birth. What keeps it interesting I suppose is finding tidbits of long forgotten stories and then trying to discern what happened next. Okay, so I’m easily entertained. But let me share a sad tale from the August 15 issue.
Life did a short feature on a group of American airmen who were shot down over China during the Korean war and had been imprisoned as spies ever since. They were finally released after years of negotiations between two hostile governments . One of these was Airman 2/c Daniel Schmidt.
An unlucky flyer, but things could be always be worse. And then they were.
While sad sack Schmidt was enduring years of Chinese torture, his lovely redheaded bride Una, who was also the mother of the child Schmidt had never seen, had remarried to a local lumberjack by the name of Alford Fine. Schmidt was understandably distraught to learn this news upon his return to the U.S. and promptly filed for divorce.
Things then got rather messy as local news accounts of the time portrayed. Una moved out of Alford’s trailer home and desperately sought reconciliation with Schmidt. Schmidt, however, was not in a forgiving mood. Meanwhile, the local sheriff pursued an investigation into whether Una was guilty of bigamy. The Air Force insisted it had notified Una that her husband was still alive in China prior to her remarriage, but Una denied it. It appeared the woman with two husbands might soon wind up with none.
Finally, Schmidt’s mother intervened and arranged a meeting between the two star crossed lovers. And when Schmidt saw Una, he fell in love all over again.
The newly reunited family makes an appearance on the Art Linkletter show.
It was a tale worthy of Hollywood, except for the happy ending part. As this outstanding blog post recounts, Una and Schmidt divorced in 1960 and Daniel died in 1962 of a broken heart. Well, during open heart surgery anyway. He was 31.
I really don’t give a duck
So, I have a friend on Facebook who is a Professor of Sociology at a university in Massachusetts. He’s a good guy (I used to play darts with him in Columbia) although he brings a decidedly leftist viewpoint to his political discussions. Which is fine, he’s one of my few liberal acquaintances who is actually willing to engage in a serious discussions of the issues of the day. We had a marathon session one night at my house while enjoying a bottle of whiskey which was a very pleasant experience.
So anyway, a few days ago he posted this on his Facebook page:
Here’s something I want to cautiously offer to the conversation – while we’ve been having important conversations about tolerance and silly arguments about free speech, more and more attention is being given to a media figure who’s real life has been managed and distorted into a stereotype of a poor person. That stereotype simply isn’t the whole picture, just take a look at the picture of the Duck Dynasty family from a few year back included in this article. Let’s try to see more of the picture, and also think a bit about who benefits from the perpetuation of the stereotypes.
From the article: ‘As long as we keep our concerns on the ideological bigotry expressed by one type of loser in the system, no one notices the corporate or government policies and practices that are the real problem. While all eyes are on the poor, rural, white, Southern bigot, we fail to see the owners of media corporations sitting comfortably in their mansions making decisions about which hilarious down-trodden stereotype to trot out next. Sexist, homophobic, and racist ideology gets a voice, while those who really benefit laugh all the way to the bank.’
And here’s the article he linked. Give it a read and then come on back.
I wasn’t going to respond at all because I could see in the FB comments that the article was blood in the water for the lefty sharks who follow him. But with the article still in mind and my holiday magnanimity satiated, I wrote the following comment:
I hesitated weighing in on this because I’ve never watched Duck Dynasty and didn’t believe that anyone who watches “reality” programs of this ilk actually think of them as real. But I read the linked article anyway and came away wondering what was more astounding–the smug arrogance or the blatant hypocrisy. And talk about stereotypes! All the liberal gospels right up front and center. You’ve got your classism, evil corporate exploitation, conservatives as racists, and oh yeah, “white privilege” all together at last! And make no mistake, the article did in fact call Robertson a bigot in the classical sense of the word.
I don’t personally care what Robertson says or believes, I don’t care if he is faux redneck, and I don’t care if A&E cancels his silly show. I don’t expect he does either. In the grand scheme of things this kerfuffle is just another pointless distraction from the issues that should matter most to the American people. But since we are on the subject I want to state once again how personally offended I am by this whole pseudo-science doctrine of white privilege. How is it different from any other race based stereotype?
Now, just a couple of weeks ago I was reading how incensed y’all were about the college professor who was taken to task for offending her white students by calling them out for their obvious (to her) guilt of being members of a privileged race. But hey, she’s got as much right to her religious beliefs as anyone, right? I just don’t understand the double-standard being applied to Robertson. I for one like the concept of a free marketplace of ideas, even the ones I don’t personally care for. I just wish my friends on the left could be so open-minded and inclusive.
But I digress. You wanted a conversation about stereotypes of the poor. Well, guess what? We are not as yet a collective and most folks can think for themselves and tend to act in an individualistic manner. Robertson no more represents the poor than does the “welfare queens” or “gang bangers” we see frequently on display in popular media. A media controlled largely by the left, if political donations to democrats are any indication. But the reality is people don’t fit in the neat little boxes to which they’ve been assigned by their intellectual betters. And that’s a good thing I reckon. Otherwise, as a person who believes in limited government I’d be nothing but a racist, homophobic, Tea Partier, right?
The best article I’ve read on this subject serves as a nice counterpoint to the one you linked. I humbly invite you to take a step outside of the echo chamber and give it a read. If you dare! http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2013/12/19/angsty-emo-outrage-and-ducks/
Glen Reynolds had the best line I’ve seen on the topic: “A&E is now cancelling “Duck Dynasty” and replacing it with a new show about life in the White House. It will be called “Duck Responsibility.”
It’s a holiday tradition
That’s right, I know it must be Christmas because I just whipped up a big batch of my Aunt Pat’s recipe fruit salad. I’ve been making it for the holidays the past 30 some odd years I reckon. It was always my favorite part of the Thanksgiving feast when I’d visit Aunt Pat (mom’s older sister) as a boy. Funny thing is I mentioned this to her and she denied any knowledge of making a fruit salad. Well, one of us is wrong about that but I’m pretty sure it’s not me.
I start by draining a can of mandarin oranges and a can of fruit cocktail…
…then I cut up a granny smith apple…
…and slice up a couple of bananas…
…the remaining ingredients are sour cream, pecans, coconut and baby marshmallows…
…I stir in the sour cream till it is mixed well with the fruit. Then I add the pecans. Next, I sweeten it up some with the coconut and marshmallows…
…and it comes out looking something like this.
Hey, I never said it was difficult! And it does taste better than it looks. The only problem I’ve ever had is with people who insist on calling it ambrosia. It’s NOT ambrosia. Ambrosia doesn’t use a sour cream base. So there.
Hope y’all have (or had) a great holiday. We’ll be heading over to spend Christmas with the son and daughter in the morning. Started and finished my Christmas shopping yesterday. It’s not hard when everyone on your list is getting a gift card. Well, the grandson is getting this:
Assembly was required. I managed it though.
Have yourself a merry little Christmas
To all our friends and family around the world:
즐거운 크리쓰마쓰
Nollaig Chridheil
Maligayang Pasko at Manigong Bagong Taon
Feliz Navidad
Weihnachtsgrüße
メリークリスマス
Geseende Kerfees en ‘n gelukkige nuwe jaar
I’D Miilad Said ous Sana Saida
Joyeux Noël et Bonne Année
Mele Kalikimaka & Hauoli Makahiki Hou
Pozdrevlyayu s prazdnikom Rozhdestva i s Novim Godom
Suksan Wan Christmas lae Sawadee Pee Mai
Noeliniz Ve Yeni Yiliniz Kutlu Olsun
Nadolig LLawen a Blwyddyn Newydd Dda
Gute Vaynakhtn un a Gut Nay Yor
聖誕快樂
(sorry, couldn’t find it in Canadian!)
Can you here me now?
When it comes to grammatical errors here at LTG readers may wonder if I’m really that ignorant or if I’m just apathetic. To which I would respond “I don’t know and I don’t care.”
So their!
We’ll make heaven a place on Earth
Came across this mind boggling and thought provoking article that claims we are moving closer to having the capability to map a human brain to the extent that a person could live on in a “virtual” world after the mortal body has turned to dust.
Imagine a future in which your mind never dies. When your body begins to fail, a machine scans your brain in enough detail to capture its unique wiring. A computer system uses that data to simulate your brain. It won’t need to replicate every last detail. Like the phonograph, it will strip away the irrelevant physical structures, leaving only the essence of the patterns. And then there is a second you, with your memories, your emotions, your way of thinking and making decisions, translated onto computer hardware as easily as we copy a text file these days.
That second version of you could live in a simulated world and hardly know the difference. You could walk around a simulated city street, feel a cool breeze, eat at a café, talk to other simulated people, play games, watch movies, enjoy yourself. Pain and disease would be programmed out of existence. If you’re still interested in the world outside your simulated playground, you could Skype yourself into board meetings or family Christmas dinners.
The author goes on to make the case that actual creation of this technology is not necessarily a good thing, noting that the moral and societal implications of implementation will “transform humanity in ways that are more disturbing than helpful.” I guess I can see the downsides, but given my lack of faith in any form of afterlife, I’d probably be inclined to accept immortality wherever I might find it. Of course, that might be it’s own kind of hell. I’m reminded of a story I read back in the 1970s entitled “I have eternal life and it’s killing me”.
Speaking of virtual worlds, of late I’ve been crafting a rather detailed fantasy life in my mind. Yeah, I’ve got too much time on my hands I suppose. But really, I just use these fantasies as a sleep aid. A detailed version of counting sheep if you will. I won’t bore you with the details of that world, although I’m young, handsome, and have the benefit of 20-20 hindsight. So yeah, I avoid all the mistakes I’ve made along the way in my real life and do things like invest in start-up companies with odd names like Microsoft and Apple. Anyway, I imagine novelists go through similar exercises as they craft their stories and create fictional characters to populate those worlds. Which is to say I don’t think I’ve gone totally off the rails.
So that’s how I kind of imagine what a virtual afterlife might look like. What do you think? Do you prefer the great unknown of death or would you rather have a computerized version of yourself live on through infinity?
I’m with Ben on this one…
Finding my geographic center of gravity
The midpoint of my life’s journey leads to this bridge in Saratoga, WY.
Well, I guess gravity has nothing to do with it. But finding your geographic center is pretty cool and fun to do (linked fixed, sorry!). Turns out the midpoint of everywhere I lived is tiny Saratoga, Wyoming. Population 1,690 proud souls and home of the annual Steinly Cup microbrew competition. Gonna have to pay those punny folks a visit one of these days I suppose.
Westminster, CA (23 years), Prescott, AZ (5 years), Fort Smith, AR (3 years), Columbia, SC (12 years and counting), Stafford, VA (8 years) and Seoul, ROK (6 years) winds up looking like this.
And where pray tell is your center?
UPDATE: I changed the headline for this post after a commenter graciously pointed out that I had invented a new word for stupid…
Is that a Glock in your pocket…
…or are you just happy to see me?
A nice commercial entitled “Wrong Girl”. Although I think I’d call it “Ginger Snaps!”. The eye candy alone makes it worth the watch.
Parenthetically speaking
A comma is important, whether it comes from Oxford or not.
You won’t find this type of mistake on LTG. Ah hell, maybe you will. But no blog is totally worthless, it can always serve as a bad example.
The scales of injustice
I have not reported on my personal Battle of the Bulge lately. Mostly because there has been nothing much to report. Once I crossed the 50 pounds lost threshold (228 pounds) I’ve encountered the proverbial brick wall. I’ve been bouncing around from a low of 225 to a high of 230 since then. This morning I was disappointed to see a 2 1/2 pound gain from last week leaving me at a bloated 229.5.
It’s my own damn fault of course. I’ve been extraordinarily lazy of late. I managed a whopping two hours total treadmill time last week. That and the fact that I’m playing darts four days a week now (Tue/Wed/Fri/Sun). Which is not to say that darts isn’t good exercise. After all, it does require you to get off your sorry ass and actually move around some. No, the problem with darts activity is that I normally consume several bottles of aiming fluid (aka beer) during a match. Even at a low 2.6 carbohydrate grams per bottle that adds up. So, I need to rededicate myself to my exercise regimen and show greater discipline in resisting temptation (damn your smoothies Jee Yeun!).
In other health related news, I’ve begun the process to becoming a non-smoker in 2014. I’ve been taking Chantix for a week now. I’ve taken it before with some success–over a year smoke free until my mother’s death knocked me off the wagon–and it does seem to curb my craving for nicotine. According to the warning label the side effects include nausea, headache, vomiting, drowsiness, gas, constipation, trouble sleeping, unusual dreams, or changes in taste. And oh yeah, suicidal thoughts and depression. Luckily for me, all I get are the unusual dreams and gas. Well, truth be told I can’t say that I’m more gassy than normal, but my normal tends to be a lot. But for me, the dreams are the best part. I find myself looking forward to going to bed wondering what I will dream tonight. Vivid, detailed, and bizarre is how I’d describe my nocturnal excursions. Certainly better than anything I’ve seen on TV lately!
So that’s my story. Wish me luck!
Does Rand Paul read my blog?
Way back in September I posted my plan for saving Detroit.
And now that Johnny-come-lately Rand Paul has stolen my best ideas.
I guess I should be flattered. Or angling for a job in the Paul administration.
You go your way and I’ll go mine?
An outstanding post from Kevin Kim over at Hairy Chasms this morning. Go give it a read right now.
And then read this one courtesy of NPR.
Makes you think. It did me anyway. I left a comment on Kevin’s blog that was long enough to a post here, so that’s what I’m making it:
This was a good and thought provoking read. As one who leans right though I must say that I haven’t observed as the norm the kind of thinking on separatism that you describe. I don’t believe that folks should stay in their place, but rather we should all have the freedom to make the place we want for ourselves. It seems to me that the most extremist viewpoints on both the right and left are what gets everyone’s attention, while the vast majority of us just want to live our lives in harmony.
For example, Malkin can definitely be out there on the fringe, but the reality is most people think we should have a sensible and consistent enforcement of our immigration laws. Although Malkin used harsh rhetoric, most countries in the world, including Korea and Mexico, strictly enforce their immigration statutes.
I too fear we are losing our “unum” and that can’t be a good thing for a country that was founded on a “melting pot” principle. But having said that, it’s always been the case that Americans have lived together and yet stayed somewhat apart. Every major city has it’s Italian district, it’s Chinatown, etc. I recall when my kids were in high school our community was 50% black and 50% white. This was decades after Jim Crow mandated segregation. And yet, at basketball games the African-Americans by choice sat almost exclusively in one section of the bleachers. There was no friction or animosity, they just preferred to sit and cheer together. I guess that’s just basic human nature.
Assimilation is good and necessary but I don’t think achieving that requires abandoning your cultural heritage either. So, I think that while English proficiency is a necessary component of becoming fully “Americanized”, I don’t really have a problem with those who haven’t mastered the language. My attitude on this has moderated significantly over the years. In my hometown in California we had a huge influx of Vietnamese boat people. I’d drive down main street and couldn’t read the shop signs in the city I grew up in and I found that irksome. But after living in Korea for several years I came to really appreciate some simple courtesies like announcing subway stops in English. Now, when I encounter the ubiquitous bi-lingual (generally Spanish/English) signs, advertisements, ballots and the like, I’m okay with it. Although I still think bi-lingual education in the public schools is wrong. It seems to me that kids who are not compelled to learn English are being set up for failure and a minimum wage lifestyle. That is in no ones best interest.
After all these years I can’t converse in Korean, so maybe shame on me. I never worked on the economy there though and I did learn enough to get by (I can order my beer and ask for the bathroom for example). I do feel like a failure though when I can’t participate in the conversation when I visit Jee Yeun’s family. But many many times I’ve had Koreans apologize to me for their “poor” English. In their own damn country! And that embarrassed me because we wouldn’t have been talking at all if they relied on my limited Korean.
Anyway, I think we might be losing something that binds us together as a nation. But on the other hand, maybe we are just evolving as a nation. I do wish we’d have less “us and them” and more “we are all in this together”. I imagine you may call me a dreamer. But I’m not the only on.
Thanks for giving…
myself a day off from the low carb life.
Son Kevin prepares the bird for its destiny…
Fry me to the moon…
Ready and willing to be served…
a bountiful spread of opportunity to over indulge…
the plate that I ate. Well, the plate was all I didn’t eat…
A fine, fine day. Thanks to Lauren and Kevin and family and friends for making it all so good!
How to write good
This little piggy went to the market
In this exciting episode of The Adventures of LTG we go grocery shopping!
Finding the larder at the Little House on the McCrarey was in a seriously depleted mode, the wife and I took to the highway for some hunting and gathering. First stop was the Korean market.
Jee Yeun’s home away from home.
It seemed we needed just about everything they sold.
One hundred fifty dollars later we loaded our burden up and carted it out.
Although two large jars of Kimchi may seem excessive, that’s only a one month supply for Jee Yeun. One radish, one cabbage.
We also scored us a nice thick slab of samgyapsal.
Bringing home the bacon!
Having taken care of the Korean specialty foods, it was off to the American supermarket for the rest of our necessities. Now, I’m a Publix kind of guy, but Jee Yeun wanted to score some galbi and Bi-Lo is the only store in town that slices short ribs in a proper Korean fashion.
In addition to our standard grocery list, I picked up the ingredients for my Aunt Pat’s recipe fruit salad, my contribution to the family Thanksgiving feast next week.
Having loaded the shopping cart to near capacity, it was time to check out. Now, I’m not going to rant about it (much) but one thing that I find irksome about the American shopping experience is that stores are going big on this “self checkout” system. As a matter of principle I refuse to ring up my own groceries. But the bastards make you suffer for your insolence by only manning the bare minimum of cashier operated checkouts. Today they had two lanes open and one of those was for fifteen items or less. One person was in the 15 item line, and there were several in the regular lane. So, a manager walks by and observes my frustration and directs me to the short line, despite the fact that I was several times over the stated maximum for items.
I sensed there would be trouble, but I followed the manager’s instructions. The customer in front of me was an older (than me) woman with two items that had already been rung up. So, we proceeded to load the conveyer belt to overflowing with our 100+ items. And waited. And waited. I’m not sure what was going on, but the woman was fumbling around in her purse for what seemed like an entirety. I guess she was looking for her Bi-Lo discount card. Finally, the cashier tried to look her up in the system without success. And then a discussion ensued as to whether the purchased items were even eligible for a discount. The woman finally decided that she would pay, and proceeded to count out the correct amount at a pace that seemed to make my head want to explode. And I’m talking about the bills. When she went rummaging for her change purse and then started counting out each individual coin I was reduced to reciting the serenity prayer repeatedly. To no apparent effect. Meanwhile, customers with 15 or fewer items were coming up, looking at our pile, and giving me the evil eye. I know what they were thinking, because lord knows, I’ve had those same thoughts when I was on the wrong side of a misbehaving customers. When you don’t follow the rules established for the grocery checkout the very fabric that binds society together begins to unravel. Yeah, there was definitely murder in the hearts of some Bi-Lo customers today.
But here’s the kicker. When the old woman was finally done with her transaction, she turned to me and said “I thought this line was for 15 items or less!” Now, I might have just ignored the comment, but then the checker said “yeah, I know.” So I remained relatively calm but gruffly pointed out that I had been directed to this line by the store manager. They both then professed to have only been “joking”. Yeah. Ha ha. Good one.
Anyway, as my purchases were rang up I had to do my own bagging (another downside of the 15 item line). I had bought two bottles of wine on sale and the cashier said if I buy four I get another 10% off, plus a nifty little carry sack. So, I sent Jee Yeun running for two more. As she placed the wine in the nifty little carry sack the cashier asked “now will you smile?” So, I mustered up my best fake smile ever and rolled on out of there.
And to think that some people believe retired life must be boring!