Dreaming man


Time is a one way street. So why does the past loom so large?

You know it’s a slow day in paradise when I’m reduced to blogging about a dream. Actually though, I don’t remember the dream that woke me from my slumber last night even though I told myself to not forget it. Ah well.

What I do recall is laying in bed unable to go back to sleep and thinking about things. And one of the things I thought about was a TV show I used to enjoy called Newhart. Or to be more precise, I was thinking about the final episode of that series, which surprising aired 30 years ago this month. Man, that makes me feel old!

For you youngsters or those who’s middle of the night memory is not as strong as mine, the Newhart show starred Bob Newhart as Dick Loudon, an innkeeper in rural Vermont. Mr. Newhart had previously starred in The Bob Newhart Show as a psychologist in Chicago. The Newhart series concluded after eight seasons with the Loudon character waking up as Dr. Hartley in Chicago. Yep, everything that happened during the show in Vermont had only been a dream.

Here”s the last couple minutes of the finale. Funny stuff!

Anyway, the point of all this, to the extent I have one, is just that I got to thinking about how I would feel if I woke up back in my Korea life, and all that has happened since that time was only a bizarre dream. I guess not knowing the answer to that kept me awake for a while.

Do I miss Korea? Yes, I do. Do I long for the relative stability and comfort I used to enjoy when I was married? Sometimes, although I don’t often allow myself the luxury of thinking about that very often. And on the flip side; do I regret moving to the Philippines? No, I can’t say that I do. Am I happy here? Hmm, perhaps not as much as I thought I would be. This is not to say there is anything wrong with my life, just perhaps that it is not all that I hoped for.

That’s the rub, I suppose. Looking back on the year I spent in Anjeong-ri, I realize now that I missed a great opportunity to embrace and enjoy that experience. Instead, I was so wrapped up in what I didn’t have there and what I was looking forward to here, that I forgot to fully live the life I had. So last night was wrestling both the demons of the past and the fears of the present. I’m not sure I came to any resolution before sleep finally overcame my troubled mind. I miss what I had but I know it’s gone. And I’d miss this life now if I left it for something else. Maybe that’s just the way it works.

Speaking of the past, I came across a photo of those long-ago days when I was just a glimmer in my father’s eyes:

I’m guessing this was circa 1950 or so. My father died 9 years ago this week.

And now I’ll return to the lockdown reality that is my current life.


Now the night is gone,
a new day is dawning
And our homeless dreams
go back to the street
Another time or place,
another civilization
Would really make
this life feel so complete.

I’ll always be a dreamin’ man
I don’t have to understand
I know it’s alright.

Voices from the past

And not just the ones in my head.

An odd afternoon yesterday. I hadn’t heard from my wife in several months and then received a message wishing me a happy birthday. My birthday is in August. Apparently she saw my party post here or on Facebook and assumed it was for me. Anyway, we exchanged some pleasantries and it was mostly good to hear from her again. I try not to think about how much I miss that old life that has been dead and buried for years now.

I also got an email from a woman I loved 13 years ago. It wasn’t so nice. She demanded that I delete a photo of her from a post I wrote here well over a year ago. I thought about it long and hard, sought out some advice, slept on it, and ultimately decided to leave the picture where it is. I did remove her name from that post which should make her invisible to a Google search. Had she made a polite request of me I probably would have done what she asked. I don’t respond well to being told what to do in a rude manner though. I did search my email archives to verify her claim that she had asked several times for the photo to be removed and as I expected, she had not. In fact, the last time we had corresponded was in 2008. In that exchange, she apologized for the manner in which she had ended our relationship and we both professed our love for one another. That was a better way to leave things than her latest correspondence. I found that missive unworthy of response. Well, I guess this post is my response.

In other unrelated news, when I first started playing darts in Itaewon, “Petro” Petrocelli was the President of the Seoul International Dart League and one of my mentors. He’s been back in the USA for quite some time now and is a sponsored professional darter in Ohio. His wife is a Filipina and I still hear from him occasionally on Facebook.

That’s me and Petro back in the day. I’m not sure who that woman is.

In darts, you have to double out. I just doubled down. Su Mi.

In quarantine news, the President announced last night that all of central Luzon, including Manila, would be downgraded from the enhanced level to general quarantine status. From what I’ve been reading that’s not going to make a bit of difference for me. Well, there are some rumors that restaurants will be able to offer dine-in service, at 50% capacity. We’ll see.

I also wanted to send a shout out to Kevin Kim for altering his lockdown meme to fit my current circumstances.

This one is for you too, Kevin:

Someone had too much time on their hands.

Speaking of time, we are all going to run out of it someday. I hope that when I go I’ll be able to give a meaningful gift like this to someone who cares for me:

What a great friend!

Does this video from the birthday party work on your computer?

As bad as I get, I’ll never be a Joe Biden though:

You go, Joe!

That’s all I’ve got for now. I suspect it is more than enough.

Oh, what a night!

I hosted a birthday party at my place yesterday afternoon. It was by far the largest gathering I’ve ever had at my house. But more about that event later in this post.

Tuesday afternoon I did some shopping. Started out at the appliance store where I purchased this beauty:

A brand new washing machine. When the lockdown closed my local laundry my helpers took on the task of washing my clothes in Filipino fashion–by hand. This should make their lives a little bit easier.

I also purchased a new blender. I knew it was low-quality made in China crap, but I didn’t have much else to choose from. It was just $25 and I figured it would get me through until I could buy something more powerful. Nope. I burned out the motor on my first attempt to make smoothies. Damn it!

I also visited the DiviMart to pick up some cheap plastic chairs and a table to accommodate my party guests. I got what I was looking for and figured I was good to go so off I went. Unloaded my driver’s car and settled in for some season 7 viewing of Game of Thrones.

So the big party day arrived with the festivities scheduled to begin in the early afternoon. But the house started filling up with Filipinas in the morning hours and they set about preparing the birthday feast. I had a walk scheduled for 10 a.m. so I wished them well in their endeavors and set out for my trek.

In addition to my regular walking mates Jim and Scott, we were joined by Troy and his gal Jessa and a former Hasher named Harry.

We decided to keep it easy and did a mostly flat 8K hike around Easter mountain.
As is my custom, I brought along some bags of candy to brighten the day of kids we encountered along the way.
Someone had built a new bridge so we gave it a try. I was impressed with its sturdiness.
Another opportunity to lighten my backpack…
Crossing the river...
Further up our path, we encountered these hard-working folks in the process of making uling (charcoal)
On the road again…
Up we go…
These folks were keeping their cool…
It’s been said that every picture tells a story. I’m not sure I understand this language though…
Scott, who is 70 years old, gingerly makes his way down…
We made it! Harry, Jessa, and Troy.

When we arrived back at the house the party was in full swing. The celebration was by and for a Filipina so us guys weren’t really relevant to the gals in attendance. Still, we got to eat the food and drink the beers. Well, the beers were mine anyway.

Some of the guests congregated in the living room…
Others were out on the patio. That’s my new table and chairs in actin…
Credit where credit is due, the gals prepared some damn tasty vittles…
My helpers, Tere and Gina, were kept busy taking care of the guests.

Some of the Filipinas were drinking Emperador, a popular local rum. The rest of us were drinking beer. Lots of beer! I had 36 bottles in the house at the start. And then we sent out for 48 more. Had a few more people show up than I anticipated and they all came thirsty. Apparently.

Maybe not so coincidentally, the night did not end without incident. It began with an accident that may have been an omen. Those chairs and stools I purchased for the party? Well, I was sitting on one of the stools, until I wasn’t.

And no, I wasn’t even drunk. Well, not THAT drunk anyway…
The culprit was that low-quality shit stool I bought. The leg could not withstand my American-sized ass I guess.

As curfew approached and the beer ran out (again) people started heading home. Most had walked to my place (or taken a trike). One guest drove though. I didn’t pay much attention to his condition when he departed but a little while later I got a message from his angry girlfriend. It seems my guest had hit someone with his car and kept on going. She said I shouldn’t have allowed him to drive drunk. And she’s right about that. He seemed fine to me when he left but then again, I’m sure I was drunk by then and wouldn’t have known the difference. Of course, I feel bad about it though.

So, this morning he tells me that he apparently clipped a woman’s arm as she walked. A woman who just happens to be a barangay official and is also acquainted with his girlfriend. The girlfriend went to the injured woman’s house last night and did her best to smooth things over. This morning he went to the barangay and was cited for a quarantine violation, driving under the influence, and leaving the scene of an accident. I’m not sure what happens next, but he wasn’t jailed at least. I expect a fine and compensation to the victim is in his future. Hopefully nothing more severe.

One of the last things I remember from last night was Harry passed out on the dining room floor.

Here he is being tended to by another guest. I was a little bit worried because I had heard Harry had some history of blackouts in bars and I wasn’t sure if this was something more than intoxication. Well, he was still alive when I came downstairs this morning, which was a relief.

I actually don’t know Harry that well so the morning encounter was a little weird. I offered some coffee which he declined. He said he was waiting for daylight before making his way back home and went to lie down on the couch. He left about an hour later without saying anything.

Meanwhile, I went to do my morning internet rituals. I had a bit of a hangover and low energy, but otherwise was feeling okay. And then someone sent me the last photograph taken of me at the party:

Yep, I got floored. And no, despite appearances that is cake smeared on my shorts. Truly.

Not much else I can say in my defense. It was a good party. A nice break from the boring lockdown routines. And not something I’ll be doing again anytime soon.

Promise.

Marching on

Yep, another post about the Hash. COVID run #2 to be exact.

Twenty Hashers showed up at the designated location at the appointed time.

The trail itself was pretty short, but when you added in the getting there part it was about right.
And we are off! Er, on. Make that On-On!
Hello out there, Easter Mountain!
What’s everybody looking at?
Oh, I see. Just another beautiful day in Barrio Barretto.
Moving on…
…and on.
The old man’s house is a landmark on the My Bitch trail. Sadly, the old man who resided here died last year.
An old man on My Bitch. Glady he is still with us. (Is it weird to talk about myself in the third person?)
On-Home was once again at Derelict’s house near the end of Rizal Extension.
A little socializing prior to the circle. Left to right: Anal Receptive, Cum Together, Blow My Pipe, and Fucking Old Man.
The Grandmaster, H.I.V., and his assistant, Buddy Fucker.
We initiated yet another virgin…
We didn’t have our customary ice block this week, so us violaters didn’t suffer the pain of sitting on the ice.

And that was a few steps closer to getting back to some kind of normalcy. I think next week we’ll even order up some ice.

And so it goes. I’m having some folks over to the house tomorrow afternoon. Went out today to buy some stuff to accommodate guests. More on that next time.

I haven’t touched a dart in way too long, but this cracked me up anyway:

I really need to start practicing. I messaged the owner of Alley Cats today to ask about the rumors that the bar would not be reopening. She denied it, but did admit it’s been a struggle dealing with ongoing expenses and no income.

I’ll be back!

High noon

One of the downsides of the COVID Hash experience is the 12:00 p.m. start time. Well, since I have to meet up on the mountain, I need to leave the house at 11:30. No big deal except this is my siesta time and my body is giving me a big WTF? right now as I prepare to head out. Man, I’m becoming such a whiner in my old age. And don’t give me that “becoming?” bullshit!

Today’s hike will be at least in part a reprise of my morning jaunt. I went up on My Bitch to deliver some goods to my mountain family.

Every little bit helps I suppose…

So, some things are so stupid they make you laugh while you are shaking your head in disbelief. The latest from the Department of Tourism is this gem of wisdom: When hotels are allowed to reopen they will be limited to only two guests per room. So, I’m picturing a Filipino family driving up to Barretto from Manila for a weekend at the beach. Mom and Dan and two kids in the back seat. They book the standard room with two queen beds at Treasure Island. And then are told the kids can’t share the room. But that long drive from Manila all together in the car is fine. What bullshit!

Ah well, stupid is as stupid does I suppose. Time for me to get stupid now and hang out with a dozen or more people for some hiking and just as importantly, some drinking this afternoon. I’m not wearing a mask on trail but I’ll try and keep my distance. Luckily, I’m a slowpoke and will likely be bringing up the rear.

I’ll let you know how things work out tomorrow.

Are we there yet?

The view from here (well, my upstairs balcony anyway) on yet another in a series of lockdown Sundays.

So, I guess there have been a couple of milestones on the way to the “new normal”, whatever in the hell that turns out to be. We are just a little over one week into the general (versus enhanced) community quarantine. More businesses have been allowed to open, trikes are allowed to operate again (limited to one passenger) and there is a general feeling of the old hustle and bustle returning. Hell, it’s starting to get dangerous to cross the highway, just like in the good old days. But we ain’t there yet.

No hotels or bars are allowed to have guests yet and restaurants are still limited to takeout only. Some businesses aren’t going to reopen at all, but maybe that’s best for the survivors since the customer base is going to be diminished. The laundry I used to use reopened and I saw the owner as I passed by the other day. She asked when I was going to bring in my clothes again. I had to confess that my helpers are now doing my laundry and I promised to buy them a machine. You could see the disappointment on her face. Oh well.

It’s not all bad news though. “Goman’s”, that hotel/restaurant/bar I used to frequent early in the quarantine, has once again reopened, albeit on the sly. I popped in because I saw the plywood blocking the door had been removed. Turns out that was just because they were doing some construction work inside. Anyway, they welcomed me back, told me to keep quiet about it, and happily served me the San Miguel Zero beer I’ve been craving.

So once again I can enjoy beachside views…
…and bring home some takeout food like these pork chops.

Turns out my old Speakeasy place is also still open. As I suspected, when the manager called to tell me they were closed, he meant they were closed to me. That’s fine. I prefer Goman’s anyway. Also, with the alcohol ban lifted it’s easier to keep the fridge full of cold ones at home. Best of all the prices have dropped back into the normal range now.

So, that’s the update on the quarantine situation. In other news, there are some nice aspects to staying home once you get acclimated to it.

Last night I enjoyed a hot out of the crockpot pulled pork sandwich. Yum!

And today I binge-watched seven episodes of season six of Game of Thrones.

My big ass curved screen Samsung TV has gotten more use in the last two weeks than it did in the previous two years.
And of course I had some nourishment and liquid refreshment to get through the marathon.

I’ll save my thoughts on some of the tangents the series has taken for when I’m sober another day.

I’m also getting to spend more time with my boys here at home.

Buddy came out on the balcony with me to enjoy the view this afternoon…
While lazy Lucky took a nap under my bed…

I didn’t do any walking today except for the morning dog exercise. I did take a couple of “interesting” photographs during that excursion though. It seems the rainstorm yesterday had some impact in the neighborhood.

I don’t want to go out on a limb, but this pine better toughen up before a real storm blows through…
And apparently this hillside got it’s rocks off during the storm. That doesn’t bode well for the houses being constructed nearby…

And there you have it, life goes on and we adjust as necessary I suppose. COVID Hash run #2 is on tap for tomorrow. That will get my lazy ass off the couch and out of the house at least.

Rain and Snow

Sorry, I’ll have a more substantial post (well, comparatively speaking) tomorrow. For now, I’ll just report that it is raining hard. I do believe we have officially entered rainy season. This will allow me to stop complaining about the heat. Damn it! Will this rain ever stop?

Anyway, I’d almost completed my morning walk before the downpour commenced. The weekend lockdown commenced at 2:00, so I had to forego my afternoon hike. Well, I did manage to score three more cases of beer today at least. And prices are back to almost normal.

I cooked up some pulled pork which went well with the conclusion of Season 5 of Game of Thrones. I was very surprised to see Jon Snow’s demise. About the only character with character. I guess Billy Joel was right when he sang only the good die young.

Speaking of death, you’d think worrying about the COVID would be enough, but today I found some info about something even more dangerous:

What the H to Oh!

Time to load up Season 6. I’ll try and do better tomorrow!


They say there’s a heaven for those who will wait
Some say it’s better but I say it ain’t
I’d rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints
The sinners are much more fun…
You know that only the good die young

On de Fence

Here is today’s post.

We (Jim, Scott, and me) did our traditional Saturday hike today so as to avoid bumping up against the weekend curfew. Not that it would have mattered because we wound up going short and finished by noon. It was all pretty hot and intense though so that was enough.

Up we go!
The climb was actually tougher than it looks.
Having prevailed, we were rewarded with this view of the bay…
…and this one of Barretto.
It never ceases to amaze me how folks make a life in the isolation of the mountains.
Scott had taken a tumble on the climb up and this kind woman brought him water to wash his scrapes and some disinfectant cream to further cleanse them. I was happy to return her kindness with candy and cookies for what appeared to be half a dozen kids roaming about.
Once you become a scofflaw over the quarantine restrictions what’s a little trespassing?

Well, rules are rules and we should all just follow orders I suppose.

It’s the Nazi thing to do.

I’m on record as stating just how ridiculous the mask-wearing requirements truly are, especially since most of the masks are homemade and porous. So this pretty much captures the preventative value of donning the mask:

We are fucked.

That’s really all I’ve got for now. I do have some news about the easing of the quarantine (or perhaps the ease of violating the quarantine) I’ll share with you tomorrow. Now some beer drinking beckons me (and yes, that last sentence is related to the previous sentence).

Stay tuned!

A nada kind of day

A wise man* once said, “he who has nothing to say should not say it”. Like that’s ever stopped me!

Grocery shopping today and my, what a difference a week makes. As we pulled up the first thing I noticed was no line waiting to get inside. It turns out that with the mall now opening at 10:00; earlier grocery shoppers must use the back entrance to the store. Walked around to that door and still no line! Of course, the store still sucks but at least I didn’t have to wait long to be disappointed. What kind of supermarket doesn’t stock Italian dressing for chrissakes?

Actually, I was also relieved that my age didn’t come up. Last week I used being an old fart to my advantage, bypassing the line by claiming senior privilege. Under the new quarantine rules, oldsters over 60 are supposed to stay home altogether. So I knew I wouldn’t be invoking the senior shortcut but I read about some people being turned away from stores in Barretto because of their age. Anyway, at least for today that turned out to be a non-issue.

I was going to cook up some pulled pork yesterday but discovered I was out of one of the key ingredients–brown sugar. I bought some today and will do the pork roast in the crockpot tomorrow. Last night I had takeout food delivered to my door for the first time ever in the Philippines. I knew the restaurant, Foodies, was good having ordered off their menu many times back in my Cheap Charlies days. And for some reason, I had a hankering for lasagna, a dish I hadn’t tried from Foodies before. The food arrived promptly but that is the best I can say about it.

Does this even look like lasagna to you?

The innards were okay I guess, but the pasta shell was hard and stiff to the point of being nearly inedible. And I’m not sure what was up with the color but I found it off-putting. I guess they didn’t use a tomato-based sauce or something. Anyway, lesson learned. Next time I’ll order stuff that I know is good, like the beef stew or meat pies.

So Facebook reminded me that I posted this seven years ago:

Still funny though, right? Must be how Kevin Kim feels every time he reads one of my posts here.

I got to wondering if I had posted this on the blog back then. And sure enough, I had, along with the story of how I learned to pronounce “ascertain”. Hint: it is NOT as certain.

I also saw this Ayn Rand meme on Facebook. What really struck me is how spot-on it is regarding the way things work here in the Philippines.

This is why a country rich in resources and cheap labor will always be a third world nation. That and the people in charge seem to be spectacularly stupid. The way the quarantine has been implemented is just the latest example of that sad fact.

Oh well, still happy to be here. Mostly.

*It wasn’t really a wise man, I just made that up. But you knew that, didn’t you?

Such is life

I’m not an expert on the provenance of words, especially words that aren’t in English. So, take c’est la vie for instance. I mean, I understand that it translates as “such is life”, but to what degree does it actually express misfortune? I’m sure you wouldn’t tell someone who just lost a loved one
“c’est la vie“, even though that’s technically true. Dying is a part of life after all. Anyway, for purposes of this post c’est la vie is expressed with a shrug and an implied “oh well”. Things are what they are whether you like them or not.

Take last night for instance. I’m of course stuck at home as usual. Right around 5:00 I pop the top off a bottle of beer, settle down on the couch, turn on the TV, and start watching the next episode of Game of Thrones. And then the power goes out. Damn, I hate when that happens. “Brownouts” as they are called here. Fortunately, it happens less often than I expected when moving to the third world. And generally speaking, the brownouts usually last for less than an hour. I was concerned though because this one occurred after 5:00, so I was pretty sure it wasn’t scheduled maintenance. After waiting a bit it was getting hot in the house. So I decided to walk down to the guard shack at the front gate to see if they knew what was going on.

I took the boys along. They were pretty surprised to be getting an afternoon walk.

Anyway, the guard said Zamelco (Zambales Electric Co-op) had been notified, but he had no idea when they’d be out. Nothing to do but light some candles, sit outside, drink beers before they get hot, and wait. I did get more than a little concerned when I noticed most of the other houses around me had power and that the street lights were working. Usually, it’s an all or nothing type deal. My next-door neighbor came out and told me she had also called Zamelco and was told a truck was on the way. And about thirty minutes later power was indeed restored.

I finished watching episode 3 of season 5 and then noticed that I had someone managed to break the two vape pens in my pocket. Must have sat on them wrong, but they were irreparable. That’s a pretty big problem because I can’t get replacements here and I have pretty much depleted my backup supply. Oh well.

I guess on the grand scale of tragedies, I’m doing pretty well though. Were it not for my petty complaints what would I have to blog about, right?

Here’s today’s “interesting” photo.

I hand out these bags of candy to the kiddies on my hikes. I just noticed the name of the company that manufactures these sweets is called “Candyman”. Hey, that’s what they call me!

I don’t know how Game of Thrones will turn out, but I was happy to see that the descendants of the Stark family are doing well:

Made in Winterfell no doubt.

I’m not sure if this constitutes a bright side or not, but it seems the pandemic has had an impact on the litter issues here in the Philippines:

Or maybe we have just masked the problem...

This cartoon made me miss those glorious nights in the bars charming the sexy young bargirls with my good looks and wit:

What’s my next move?


Man: Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I’ll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I’m a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what’s your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.

Well, don’t judge me on my love life alone. In fact, I’m thinking about taking the archives of LTG and turning them into an autobiography. I’ve even got a title picked out:

No. No, it didn’t.

Such is life.

COVID Hash Run #1

I had the honor of participating yesterday in the historic first running of the COVID Hash. With the easing of quarantine restrictions, some members of the Subic Bay Hash decided to push the envelope and get On-On again.

Now, the quarantine rules still don’t allow us to do what we did, but we did it anyway. We did, however, try to be discreet about it. In that regard, we met up on the mountain so as not to draw unwarranted attention to ourselves. Our regular meet-up location (Johannson’s) is still closed anyway. For our On-Home beer drinking and Hash circle activities, we camped out at a fellow Hasher’s residence. I guess our illicit plan worked out okay because we were not accosted by the authorities. In fact, we intend to do it again come Monday.

We did a short 5K trail, although I did another 5K going to and getting home from the Hash. Here are some photos as promised:

Pubic Head was kind enough to add my path (in pink) to our meet-up point.
Early arrivals. We met up at “4 corners” an intersection of trails that is a landmark on My Bitch. Around 1.5K from my house.
Is everybody here? Let’s go!
On-On! Here we are actually passing through the yard of my mountain family friends.
Marching on…
…and up. That’s me practicing social distancing way back there second to last…
It was a steady climb but really not a bad one.
Up top. Then we went down to the valley and back up again.
Keep on Truckin’ onwards…
Without a marked trail, we pretty much all stayed together. That’s unusual for the Hash, but it was nice to not be alone on trail for a change. Yeah, I’m the old slow guy. Although actually, Buddy Fucker and Pubic Head both fell way behind on the final climb. They knew the way to the On-Home so we let them set their own pace.
Don’t give up yet!
It was another hot ass day, so Pubic Head took advantage of this shady spot to catch his breath…
A valley view from the trail.
Passed by this lonely virgin in the woods…
On-Home was at Derelict’s house. This is the driveway…
We did the Hash circle inside a huge screened porch area.
Initiating a virgin Hasher…
Buddy Fucker got the Hashit for being DFL (dead fucking last).
Not a bad turnout for a bunch of lawbreakers!

I wound up getting pretty a good buzz on because I was drinking stronger beer than normal (still no Zero’s and they ran out of SM Light). The shortest way home was taking My Bitch back, but I wasn’t so drunk that I thought THAT was a good idea. Walked the back streets and took advantage of that by popping into my favorite eatery–Sit-n-Bull.

They are only open now for takeout, so I brought me home a great tasting pulled pork sandwich and some baked beans. Hit the spot it did.

Instead of blogging like I promised to do I popped open a beer, turned on the TV, and watched a couple more episodes of Game of Thrones. Sorry ’bout that!

I guess little by little we are moving back towards normalcy. Here’s hoping it continues.

Holy hell

Life’s a beach. Oops, I spelled bitch wrong.

In my last post, I naively speculated that perhaps my run of things going broke in the night might be over. Turns out there were some holes in that theory. Like these:

My living room ceiling…
…and the floor in my upstairs bathroom.

As you have likely surmised the two holes are related. My helper noticed the ceiling was discolored and sagging. Luckily, she knew someone in the biz and he came out and cut a hole to see what was up. Turns out the toilet in the master bath was leaking. He spent most of Saturday making repairs. Cost me 700 pesos for the labor ($14.) and 2000 pesos ($20) for the materials. The job still isn’t finished though as I’m told the repairs “need to dry”. Which meant I was peeing off the upstairs deck last night since I’m too lazy to walk to the downstairs bathroom. Exciting times, eh?

This is the first weekend of the new normal around here, which basically means my hike on Saturday was mostly legal as the weekend lockdown didn’t begin until 2:00 p.m. It was just Scott and I and since the sky was threatening rain we confined ourselves to flat city streets and Baloy Beach.

The beach was about as empty as it can get. Keep in mind this is a Saturday during what used to be the high season.
Just yours truly and a father and child out in the water. I felt bad for the kid because it was starting to rain. Probably got soaked!
Empty nipa huts that would normally be teeming with Filipino families…
And no customers for the banca boats either…

Last night I fired up the grill and this was the result:

You should have tasted my rump! Steak that is. Although honestly, it was a bit tougher than I like…

Tonight I was grilling chicken and the grill quit working. Hopefully, it is only out of gas, but I have my doubts since it hasn’t been very long since my last refill. We’ll see if my string of bad luck continues.

Spent a very lazy Sunday binge-watching Game of Thrones. I’m through season four now and that puts me into new territory. I recall from several years ago watching the episode where Joffrey was poisoned, but since then I’m seeing the storyline for the first time. Good stuff. I’ve got an old man’s ears now and the torrents I downloaded from Pirate Bay apparently don’t have subtitles which makes things a little hard to follow sometimes. Especially when Khalessi is speaking whatever the hell language she shares with the natives. Still enjoying it though.

And there you have another report from my locked-down life. But before I go, let me share some stuff you might like almost as much as I did.


He that would make his own liberty secure, must guard even his enemy from oppression; for if he violates this duty, he establishes a precedent that will reach to himself.
–Thomas Paine

Sometimes it seems like our founders are speaking to us from the grave as a reminder to stand up for what is important. Steve, the Englishman who doesn’t drink, left the following comment to my post on Facebook:


What does that mean in English?

Eh, even after all these years the Brits still don’t get it. Go worship your Queen or something!

Well, I did manage to secure two more cases of beer. At TWICE the normal price. Ah, sweet capitalism and the law of supply and demand!

And here’s a public service announcement from someone who knows what they are talking about:

Stay safe!

A little political humor for your viewing pleasure:

The ought to be a couple more at least joining them at the Barr.

And finally, I found this pretty punny:

Hopefully, my luck will change. Um, change for the better I mean!

We are going to do a first-ever Quarantine Hash tomorrow. Not sure of the details, just that we are meeting up on the mountain. I’m sure it will be a small group. Look for a full report and photos after we’re done.

Peace out!

If it ain’t broke…

…don’t fix it. If it is broke you’re screwed. Or so it seems.

Now, I can’t say that the virus (whose origin cannot be named) is responsible, but it seems that I’ve had a run of things going broke that coincidentally coincided with the unavailability of repairs or replacements. It started with my Fitbit, then my watchband. The other night my blender gave up the ghost and then last night I discovered my mosquito zapper has burned out. Hopefully, I’ve used up all my bad luck by now!

Speaking of luck, more details have emerged regarding the lowering of the quarantine status from “enhanced” to “general”. My province of Zambales had been slated for general but for some unknown reason requested to remain under enhanced requirements. However, the city in which I reside (Olongapo) is an independent entity within Zambales and has elected to transition to general. Meanwhile, the Subic Bay Metropolitan Authority (SBMA) which is the official name of the old Navy base, has decided to remain closed to non-residents. Confused yet?

So says our esteemed Mayor.

Practically speaking, not a lot changes for me. The curfew is now 7 p.m. which provides me an extra hour and nowhere to spend it. The weekend lockdown will now begin at 2 p.m. on Saturday giving me an extra half-day to be out and about quasi-legally. Thank you, Mr. Mayor! Oh, and the sale of alcohol is no longer banned, but consumption is. I’m still trying to figure that one out. The department stores are allowed to reopen but are not permitted to use air conditioning or provide wifi. Still, maybe I can replace my broken shit.

Or maybe not. Actually, the above tweet was from San Diego, CA. Apparently they are in some kind of “stupid” contest with the Philippines.

Oh well, no use in complaining. We just all need to reach out and lend a helping hand in these difficult times.

That’s the important thing!

And at least we still have access to take out and food delivery:

Yes, the wurst will be here soon…

But you know what? Walking about this afternoon I did realize just how small my problems truly are. I bitch and moan of course, but that’s an old man’s privilege, right? And really, when life tries to push a big “fuck you” in your face…

…just shove that fucker away.

Rooftop beer drinking on tap for this afternoon to celebrate the end of enhanced quarantine. How better to celebrate a quarantine than by violating its strictures!

I haven’t had this much fun stickin’ it to the man since my rebellious teenage years! Woot!

Odds and ends

Things I saw when I was out and about on the internet today.

Kevin Kim had a thought-provoking post dealing with the philosophical questions regarding the “right” way to give to others. He delved into the religious aspects of charity for charity’s sake and how that true generosity is not contingent on getting something in return. Good stuff, go give it a read.

I left a comment on Kevin’s post regarding my own selfish motivations for helping others:


I’m living comparatively rich in a poor country. When I first started visiting here I’d feel guilty and get depressed about all the poverty that surrounds me. So I resolved that when I moved here I’d find ways to make a difference for some people at least. I help a few in various ways which perhaps makes their lives a little easier. I get the satisfaction of knowing my presence here has made a small improvement for them. I’m honest about the selfish nature of my charity, but to me, it’s a win-win. Since religion plays almost no part in my life I sleep just fine at night despite my doctrinal failings.

I really hope I don’t come off as engaging in virtue signaling. I mean, I do what I do and it may not be much, but every little bit helps I hope. I’m certainly not looking for any attaboys, but doing what I do makes me feel better, I honestly don’t give a flip what others may think of me or my activities. I can’t recall where or when I first heard this anecdote but it still resonates with me:

There was a big storm and after it passed thousands of starfish were washed up on the beach as far as the eye could see. A young boy was standing near the water and throwing the starfish back into the ocean one by one. An old man approached and said: “Little boy, why bother? You can’t save all these starfish.” The boy responded as he picked up antoher starfish and threw it into the sea: “Maybe not, but I saved that one!”

We all just need to do the best we can. Leaving things better than we found them is a worthy accomplishment. Let’s move on, shall we?

You can’t open your browser without encountering hysterics and doomsday platitudes concerning that mysterious virus that magically just appeared in the world. It would be racist to actually say where it came from, or so I’ve been told by folks who claim their intellect is superior to mine.

I just laugh at them.
There are none so blind as those who refuse to see…

But despite all the bullshit, occasionally you can ferret out a tidbit or two of truly useful information. Imagine the comfort I took when I saw a pillow that looked exactly like mine:

I’m not exactly sure what the connection to being a sweaty sleeper and beating the virus might be, but I’m always grateful for my lucky genes!

On a more serious note, I came across a writeup on an expat forum I read that pretty closely echo my sentiments. Well, except for the part about bailing on the Philippines. I’m not ready to give up on this country just yet.


Just a heads up on lockdown in a major city in the Philippines. Lots of insanity and madness at all levels. The country had major problems and human rights issues prior to the so called corona virus, now it’s all just snowballed. Millions of the poorer people’s lives have been made worse than they already were. Without the monthly pay check they are basically screwed. Lots of problems getting food. A lot of the aid hasn’t reached them, and possibly been pocketed by those in power, as people have suggested. Yet so many people just go about their daily lives.

This is the first time I have ever heard some Filipinos say this is a shit country. Usually they are quite patriotic. That’s not to say a lot of the masses are speaking out. The average poorer Filipino is not often found to think for themselves or question or do their own research. So many reactions to this whole so-called pandemic have been nothing short of disturbing indeed. As a society it has got to be one the most easily scared and manipulated that I have ever witnessed, especially in the lower classes.

In my opinion, the people of authority here often have no idea what they are doing. What I commonly see here is people in positions of authority that clearly do not possess the intelligence or common sense to make decisions that affect people’s lives. The main problem with people like this is that they think they are smart, but they are not. It’s a common trait here, maybe a form of narcissism.

It is what it is and hopefully at some point sanity will prevail. Here’s hoping!

Some of these lockdown rules just go too damn far!

Anyway, Olongapo begins the general quarantine rules on Saturday. I’m not sure that it will matter much, still no bars to go hang out in.

You know, I’ve not even touched my darts since the bars were shut down. I have a decent setup here at the house but I’m just suffering from a complete lack of motivation to practice. Hell, I could have been a pro by now…

In other news, it looks like I’ll be able to stop complaining about the heat soon:

Rainy season is coming! Something new to bitch about!

Scott posted some photos he took of yesterday’s walk on his Facebook page. He’s better with the camera than I am. Here are a few for your perusal:

A man in heat.
I’m coming! I’m coming!
Living large…
A much better photo of the laundry ladies creekside.
The final push to the top…
Kids love the candy!
But this teenager turned down my generous offer. Go figure. Maybe I’m the guy her mother warned her about…

Alright, enough of that. Let me leave you with this:

No shit?

I do recall the dyslexic bank robber who burst inside and shouted: ÖKAY MOTHER STICKERS, THIS IS A FUCK UP! GET YOUR ASS IN THE AIR OR I’LL BLOW YOUR HANDS OFF!”

You are welcome.

Trail blazing

I hope you like this post!

It was hot out on the trail today. Blazing hot. Four bottles of water hot. We cut short our planned hike but still wound up with a 10K morning. A different way (for me) up the big mountain and a brand new way down for all of us–there was no trail so we just blazed our way the best we could. Got a little dicey in places, but made it to the bottom in one piece.

Thatch grass the way I like to see it…harvested and ready for new duty as a roof on a nipa hut.
Making our way up…
Scott crossing the requisite rickety bridge. Not sure what’s up with my camera, he looked a lot closer when I took the photo.
It wasn’t the hardest way up, but I was still sucking wind and falling further behind than usual. Scott and Jim were patient though…
Wash day on the mountain. Hard to imagine doing laundry in a creek, but when that’s the only option it is the best option I suppose. I sweetened their day with some candy…
The final push to the top.
One view…
…and another. Both from the same vantage point.
Jim took the lead on getting us down. What he thought was a trail petered out, so we made our own. Really steep and slippery in places, but we found a way.
Onward!
I guess I should have taken this as an omen for what was in store.
Kevin Kim’s last post about his crazy hike included some nice flower pics. Two can play that game!
What I liked about these was that they were growing right out of the concrete. Good job, guys!
And I also managed to break the 20,000 step barrier for the first time in quite a while.

In other news, I came across this Kevin James short film and it was really funny in a sad way. Less than two minutes long, give it a watch!

And I’ll leave you with this Wuhan virus moment:

I wear a mask because it is required of me. I know and I suspect the authorities know it doesn’t make a damn bit of difference. Especially since ANY face covering is acceptable. Lots of folks just tie a bandana over their face. Those with actual masks usually wear them pulled UNDER the nose. Ah well, the show must go on!

Anyway, it was a good day. I’ve got enough beer here at home to get me through the night so I reckon I will pop one open and enjoy some Game of Thrones.

Which reminds me. Did anyone else notice the parallels between some current events and the sad demise of Ned Stark? Michael Flynn is no traitor but he gets railroaded on bullshit charges. He finally pleads guilty to keep his son from being prosecuted on another made up charge (the bogus Logan Act). Ned was an honest man too and confessed to a crime he didn’t commit to protect his children. At least Flynn didn’t lose his head. Those damn Lannister’s are a lot like Hillary, aren’t they?

Fit as a fiddle

Well, maybe not, but I’ll be fit in a bit. That is if my brand new just delivered Fitbit fitness tracker motivates me to get off my lazy ass and start meeting my 20,000 step daily goal again.

Ain’t she sweet? And now I can even give you the time of day!

Facebook has also provided me some inspiration by reminding me what I looked like seven years ago:

“Ah, but I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now”.

I don’t want to go back there so I gotta keep steppin’ it up!

The fact that I was able to get my Fitbit delivered through an online purchase at Lazada (the Philippine version of Amazon) is noteworthy. When my old Fitbit died a month ago, Lazada wasn’t shipping. I’ll take that as a positive sign that we are moving ever so closer back to normal, albeit baby steps.

Speaking of which, it was announced today that effective this Saturday Zambales province is being downgraded to “general community quarantine” status. Practically speaking that won’t make a lot of difference. Some stores and businesses are being permitted to reopen, but not restaurants, bars, and hotels. Still, there are a few things I’d like to buy at the mall so maybe that will happen. I’m also hoping the restrictions on entering the old Navy base will be rescinded so I can once again go grocery shopping at Royal. No word on whether the ban on purchasing alcohol will be lifted or if the curfew will remain in place. Stay tuned.

I guess even under a general quarantine the would-be Nazis will have plenty of opportunities to rat out their neighbors.

Today’s “interesting” photograph was taken in the yard of my next-door neighbor’s house.

That’s quite an impressive tree, don’t you think?

Actually, what makes it impressive to me can’t be seen because of the morning sunlight behind the tree. So, I went out and took this one from my backyard using the zoom feature:

It’s in full bloom right now. Beautiful brightly colored flowers.

Going out in a bit to enjoy some rooftop beers with Jay. Got to make the best of what you have, right?


My guard stood hard when abstract threats
Too noble to neglect
Deceived me into thinking
I had something to protect
Good and bad, I define these terms
Quite clear, no doubt, somehow.
Ah, but I was so much older then,
I’m younger than that now.

2/24/731

Well, no matter how you slice it, today marks two years, or twenty-four months or 731 days that I’ve been living in the Philippines. Time flies.

Not sure what to make of this anniversary. These past couple of months have been rather unpleasant but overall I can’t say I regret making the move. I have a comfortable and comparatively easy life here. I never found the love I’d hoped for but I’m learning to live without it. I’ve settled into my routines and as my faithful readers have surely noticed, that can sometimes get a little on the boring side. Honestly though, I mostly enjoy the walking, with a group or on my own. I miss my bar life these days which provided some semblance of a social life. I guess that’s enough for an old retired guy.

Looking backwards (dangerous I know!) I do miss the life I left behind in Korea. Not enough to second guess my decision to move here, but I have regrets about not appreciating my time there while I was living it. There’s something to be said for living in the moment. I was too busy lamenting the life I’d lost to enjoy the life I was living I suppose.

Looking forward I imagine this life will do and if it doesn’t I’ll do something different. Getting a first-hand taste of the utter incompetence of the idiots in charge does make me consider dusting off my Plan B. I understand Cambodia is back to pretty much normal these days. Well, at least the bars are open again there. But I ain’t going anywhere anytime soon. I do want to incorporate more travel into my life once things calm down again.

As to regrets, well, you know the song, I’ve had a few. Although really, the disappointments were the tuition to the school of experience. I’ve been scammed a few times by women I thought I knew and trusted, been ghosted by people I considered friends, and let down on occasion when I misjudged the true nature of someone’s character. But honestly, I’ve been doing that all my life so I guess it’s really on me.

So, the journey continues until it ends and I’m still motivated to keep on moving forward as long as possible. I’m relatively healthy and I’m thankful for that. I think my being here has made a positive difference in a few lives and that was one of my goals when I made the move. I’m going to strive to live each day as it comes and be satisfied with whatever it brings. And whenever I start feeling depressed or sorry for myself, I’ll just take a look out the window.

Life is good.

Thanks for joining me here. It’s nice to have y’all along for the ride!

I would if I could but I can’t so I won’t

Nothing to do but put on my big boy pants and deal with. Yep, winding finishing up yet another lockdown weekend. In theory, this should be the last one, but Lucy has pulled away that football so many times now that I ain’t counting on it.

Done with season two of Game of Thrones, so that’s an accomplishment I suppose. I also got desperate enough to start playing solitaire on the computer. I’m up to the Master level now!

Speaking of being a master, I came across this clip of George Carlin back in the day (early 1970s?). He was talking about this pandemic bullshit way back then. Just over six minutes and well worth the watch. Dude must have been a time traveler.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSbT7JVNEU4&feature=youtu.be&fbclid=IwAR0tiEoSly-nQnCv4q4mCdSIuaREeDGStqEyu3vQUQHopEJklZjFdk3pJ3Q
What he said.

And while we are on the subject of time travel, Kevin Kim did another of his “crazy walks”, this time doing an overnight hike on the streets of Korea. I’d never even considered doing such a thing and unless I’m on the run from the law I doubt I ever will.

Yesterday’s morning walk was much more my style:

All done in sane fashion during daylight hours. Most of it was in the Subic jurisdiction which isn’t under strict weekend lockdown, so kinda sorta legal too.
Scott and Jim met me at the home of my mountain friends. It’s rustic, but they seem to be doing alright.
As is my custom during these difficult times I carried up some rice, canned goods, and other treats to help them out a bit…
This is about as close to a carabao as I want to get. They are horny devils…
A view on the trail…
A mountain view…
A bay view…
A view of Scott and Jim…
Hello little girl, would you like some candy?
Kids hanging out…

Anyway, it was a hot but otherwise pleasant 8K endeavor. The highlight of my weekend by far, but that’s not saying much I suppose.

For today’s interesting photo, I’ll offer this:

Stuck on you.

My helper had put out some flypaper. This morning when I went to make my coffee I encountered this poor guy. I know the feeling to be stuck in the house.

And I’ll leave you with this golden oldie:

Hey, it gave me a smile. But then, I’m pretty bored so YMMV.

Time for me to get back to counting flowers on the wall. Or watching Game of Thrones. One of those.


I keep hearing you’re concerned about my happiness
But all the thought you’re giving me is, conscience I guess
If I were walking in your shoes, I wouldn’t worry none
While you and your friends are worrying ’bout me
I’m having lots of fun

Counting flowers on the wall, that don’t bother me at all
Playing solitaire ’til dawn with a deck of fifty one
Smoking cigarettes and watching Captain Kangaroo
Now don’t tell me I’ve nothing to do

I don’t have the time

A couple of weeks ago my Fitbit died on me. And then last night this happened:

My watch band broke (again). Luckily, there’s a shop at the mall where I can get it fixed. That is, whenever the fuck the mall opens again.

Yeah, I’m old school. I’ve never relied on my phone as a timepiece. It’s hard to get into the habit, especially at night. Hell, I never even used to bring my phone upstairs when I went to bed. Now when I wake up at o’dark thirty I have to reach down, pick up the phone, tap the screen twice to activate it, and then realize that without my glasses (still downstairs on my desk) I can’t read the time display. It is those little things that make life harder than it ought to be.

Speaking of time, it is still passing whether I can track its progress or not. Facebook shared with me what I was doing two years ago:

Enjoying my re-retirement luncheon…

And life goes ever onward. Here’s the “interesting” photo from this morning’s walk:

This was written on the wall outside Columban College. I asked Google what “tayo” means in Tagalog and the answer was “let’s go”. Then I asked my helper about “sex tayo” and she started laughing. Apparently it is how you ask someone to have sex with you. Good to know!

Speaking of sex, Catherine came to visit yesterday afternoon. It was her idea. Honestly, she’d been pestering me for days. And it was fine and dandy. Last night she sent me a message saying “babe, my friend have phone for sale. Only 15K.” I didn’t respond so I don’t know if she wants me to buy her a phone or was just letting me know one was available. Well, I don’t need a phone and I ain’t spending $300. to buy one for someone else. Still, a little disappointing. You help someone out and they assume you are a sucker. I’m going to have to be pretty damn horny before I invite her back!

On the internet today I was reminded that my foreign language skills aren’t much better than this:

I have found that the only phrase I need in French is “ferme ta bouche”.

And don’t even get me started on punctuation:

As Kevin Kim has been trying to teach me, commas are about so much more than the pause.

Sometimes I stir shit up on Facebook in a manner other than my intended one. I posted this for all those #stayathome and trust the government to look out for you types:

Just be a good little sheep. We have a nice shower waiting for you at the end of the train ride…

Anyway, one of my German FB friends took offense and talked about Americans being fucked up in the past as well, specifically mentioning the Indians. I responded that is precisely my point–anyone who trusts the government to serve their best interests does so at their own peril.

Later this afternoon I’ll be doing the rooftop beer drinking thing. And tomorrow will begin another total lockdown weekend. Looks like more Game of Thrones binge-watching is in my future.

C’est la vie.

Gouged


The vaccine I’m hoping for from this entire Coronavirus episode in American history is one that inoculates the population from these unbearable, pathetic Shame Squads.

We’ve heard enough from you, Karen.

Anyway, I was fearless on my weekly grocery shopping expedition this morning. I needed to be when I got a glance at the line waiting to get inside the mall which allows you to get in line to get into the store.

The line was about twice as long as last week’s line. I don’t know why.

Well, as it turns out I didn’t have to wait for long. My driver once again successfully got me in through the senior citizen’s line. Hey, old age has its privileges. I’m not sure it is technically legal since I don’t have the government-issued oldsters ID, but I won’t say anything if you don’t.

I’ve had several folks ask me to be on the lookout for the Filipino alcoholic beverage of choice, Emperador. It’s a light rum, but not really my thing. And six weeks into this lockdown it is getting scarce. So I was disappointed on behalf of my friends when I learned that the SM store had none in stock. On the drive back home my driver mentioned that he “knew a guy” that might have some for sale but that he was charging more than twice the previous price for a bottle (95 pesos versus 220). Well, fuck. That’s the law of supply and demand, right? So, I had him go ahead and secure me a case of the stuff. Hell, it will make some friends happy and might even come in handy should I run out of beer.

It’s like liquid gold. Apparently.

Speaking of beer, I still have a case and a half left from the three cases I bought last week (shaddup!). At that rate of consumption, I might not make it through the quarantine. I ran into the guy who helped me buy the last batch but he too has now raised his prices (from 1000 pesos a case to 1800). That’s basically paying inside the bar retail prices without getting to actually be inside the bar. Damn. What’s a beer lover to do? I paid for another case at the inflated rate.

And that’s how things are in my world today. But wait, before you go take a look at these gems and jewels I came upon while hiking through the hills and valleys of the internet:

“If it weren’t for double standards they’d have no standards at all.”
Do you think that Thomas Jefferson could see into the future?

And finally, I’ll need to be on the lookout for this Game of Thrones mishap:

Not sure what season this is from but I’m not there yet.

Something to look forward to!