Back home from my weekend jaunt to Walt Disney World in Florida and here are some random thoughts on the experience.

I am a Disney agnostic which sets me apart from the fanatics and haters.  And me and Disney go way back.  Disneyland in California opened a month before I was born, and I grew up living less than ten miles from the park.  Back in those days you paid a small admission fee to enter the park and then paid for each ride individually.  Or you could purchase a book of ride coupons called a “Valu-Pak”.  The rides were all graded A-E, with A being the least popular (cheapest) and the best rides (Matterhorn Bobsleds, Jungle Cruise, etc.) requiring the much coveted “E ticket”.  Now, my grandma worked as a housekeeper in a motel near Disneyland and the tourists would leave unused coupons as a tip (cheap bastards) when they checked out.  Usually there were only crappy A and B tickets, but once in a while she’d bring home some books with some D’s and on a few joyous occasions we would score a magical E ticket.  So, even though we were comparatively poor I’d visit the Magic Kingdom at least a couple of times a year.  Hell, in high school Disneyland was was a great place to take your girl on a date.  There was this nice sit down restaurant (with waiters and everything) inside Pirates of the Caribbean that never failed to impress, well I was gonna say impress the pants off a virgin, but that never happened.  For me at least.  I had more success in that regard going to the beach to watch the submarine races.  But that’s another story.

Now that I’ve digressed, let me head off on a tangent.  Mr. Boothroyd was my seventh grade math teacher.  During the summers he was a “guide” on the Jungle Boat attraction at Disneyland (which he would brag about in class). For some unknown reason he disliked me.  Well, to be completely honest back in the day I could be a bit of a smartass and my mouth earned me a paddling from more than one teacher.  But it was different with Boothroyd.  He would mock and humiliate me.  We were a working class family in an upper middle class school district.  And Boothroyd would actually make fun of my clothes in front of the rest of the class.  I guess it was a tradition for him because he hated my older brother as well.  My father was in route sales back then supplying packaged foods to catering houses, including salads and desserts.  Boothroyd told my brother (again, in front of the whole class) if he didn’t study harder he’d grow up selling Jello out of a truck just like his dad.  Bastard.  To this day I can’t ride the Jungle Cruise without thinking of that prick.  Ironically, just before I entered government service I was working in route sales supplying ready-made sandwiches to convenience stores.  I did pretty well at it too.

But let’s get back to Disney World shall we?  These days you buy a park pass (about $90 per day) and all the rides are included.  The rides are mostly better and the lines longer than I remember.  In addition to the Magic Kingdom, you can visit Epcot (my personal favorite) Disney’s Hollywood Studios, and the Animal Kingdom.  These parks are surrounded by Disney owned hotels and resorts.  In fact, the whole complex at some 47 square miles is larger than San Francisco and all privately owned by the Disney company.

Now, Walt Disney was a visionary and by most accounts a truly great American.  I certainly admire him.  But the Walt Disney World we visit today is decidedly not what he had in mind.  The Experimental Prototype Community of Tomorrow (EPCOT) as conceived by Mr. Disney was to be a “community of the future” designed to stimulate American corporations to come up with new ideas for urban living.  In describing his city, Walt Disney is quoted as saying: “EPCOT will take its cue from the new ideas and new technologies that are emerging from the forefront of American industry. It will be a community of tomorrow that will never be completed. It will always be showcasing and testing and demonstrating new materials and new systems.”

Alas, Walt Disney died while his dream city of tomorrow was still on the drawing board.  After his death, the Disney Company scrapped his vision and went with the money making theme park/resort hotels concept.  And you really can’t argue with success, today Disney World is the world’s top tourist destination and it provides employment for over 66,000 people.

But what really prompted this overly long post is this simple fact: it works.  Although I had visited Disney World several times in the past, this was my first experience staying in a Disney resort and doing the package deal (including multi-day theme park tickets).  What impressed me was how seamlessly and smoothly the whole thing comes together.  I drove down, but if you fly in a Disney bus picks you up at the airport and delivers you to the resort, free of charge.  You don’t mess with your luggage, they bring that separately and deliver it to your room.  When you check in, you are given a “key to the world”.  Not only does this key open your room door, it serves as your ticket to all the theme parks, and allows you to charge anything you desire to purchase with a simple touch of the key (same concept as the T-money system in Korea).  That key is all you ever need during your entire visit.

Disney also provides complimentary bus service to anywhere and everywhere in the park.  The buses run on time, they are clean and comfortable, and the drivers are friendly.  Well, EVERY employee I encountered during my weekend stay was smiling and courteous without exception.  No detail goes overlooked, and it just all comes together in the most extraordinary way.

And that’s the thing.  Walt Disney World is for all intents and purposes a small city (albeit with an incredibly transient population) and they get it right in a way real cities can never seem to manage.  Why is that?   Absent evidence to the contrary, I’d say it is more proof that the private sector can do almost everything the government can do, only better.

So there you have it.  My point that is.  Which I could have made in the first two paragraphs and saved you all this pain (assuming you actually made it this far).  But what can I say, after 34 years with the federal government I even blog like a bureaucrat.

“Grandpa went to Disney World and all I got were these crappy Mickey Mouse ears”