It’s strange sometimes how things just seem to fall together. While I was out walking and listening to a playlist Spotify chose for me, this Townes Van Zandt song I don’t recall ever hearing before comes on. Somehow it just resonated with me. And that led to some introspection and a realization that I seemed to have hit a sweet spot and found the proverbial happy place in my life. At least for the moment, given my history, I can’t count on it lasting, but damn, it has been a long time since I’ve been free of the burdens that come with regret. No, things are nowhere near perfect or even what I hoped for, but I’m at peace with what I have found in the here and now. That’s about as close to an epiphany as this muddled old brain will render.

Days, up and down they come
Like rain on a conga drum
Forget most, remember some
But don't turn none away.
Everything is not enough
And nothin' is too much to bear.
Where you been is good and gone
All you keep is the getting there.

Here are some of the things I remember about yesterday, starting with a wet street walk. My phone battery was gone, so the pictures from the walk are all Scott’s:

I had mentioned my Friday evening plans included a scheduled meet-up with my new favorite Whiskey Girl, Kim. WG doesn’t open until 5:00, so I killed some time at Sloppy Joe’s. It was nice hanging out with Chris and Jim, two other American expats enjoying their golden years in a retirement community that caters to the desire of us old fuckers for cold beer and hot women. As I made my way to the planned rendezvous with Kim, she sent a message saying she was going to be late for work. Hmm, she didn’t say how late but did say she was on her way. I know she lives in Olongapo City, so I figured thirty minutes max. Two beers later, I was feeling foolish for waiting, so I paid up and headed out.

I was a tad hungry and thought I’d grab a bite at Thumbstar. The kitchen is outside the front door, and as I arrived, I saw my old friend Rica was cooking. Perfect. Except, I didn’t want to go inside the bar, and all the seats outside were filled with girls who should have been inside the bar. Despite dropping several large hints and telling Rica I wouldn’t stay if I couldn’t eat outside, no one made any effort to accommodate my desires. So I left with an empty stomach.

Well, the missed connection with Kim and the rude treatment at Thumbstar had soured my mood somewhat. I decided my crew at Cheap Charlies would be glad to cheer me up, so I climbed those stairs and took my regular seat overlooking the highway. Nerissa “greeted” me by saying she had seen me with “my date” at Central Park on Thursday and that was my last straw. I lit into her saying I wasn’t with a date, I was comforting a friend who had lost someone dear to her. And why would should you care who I was with anyway, you are just someone I know from the bar, not my girlfriend. Yeah, it was a bit harsh and my tone was angry. I immediately felt bad, apologized, and bought a round of drinks. The damage was done and the buzz was killed, though.

Sitting there I recalled that living without drama is a proactive effort. If I let the little shit disappointments trigger me, happiness will remain elusive. And I let it all go. Oh, I’ll be back at Whiskey Girl one of these days and I’ll be my usual sweet self with Kim. The food at Thumbstar is okay, but I have better options. If Nerissa wants to play the part of a jealous Filipina, she can find someone else to buy her drinks. I just don’t care. And like magic, I was ready to enjoy the rest of my Friday out on the town.

I crossed the highway and made my last stand at The Green Room. My table was soon surrounded by the gals I know there–Angie from the Hash, Chu, my regular waitress, the little girl who does my back rub, and Mary, the woman I first met when I was staying at the Arizona Resort in 2010. I ordered a round of drinks for them all and had Chu fetch a menu from Sit-n-Bull. I had a club sandwich, and the girls had pancit.

So, what could have been a disappointing evening turned out just fine. I can’t control the behavior of others, but I’m the boss of how I react to it.

Them holes are all that's real.
Some fall on you like a storm,
Sometimes you dig your own.
The choice is yours to make,
Time is yours to take;
Some sail upon/dive into the sea,
Some toil upon the stone.

So, I believe I mentioned becoming Facebook friends with Mama Onenia (aka Olivia) and her daughter, Jennifer, the “first family” up on the My Bitch mountain trail. The “conversations” have pretty much been limited to an exchange of “good mornings,” but I was surprised to hear from Jennifer the other day asking if I had an old phone she could use. Apparently, she’s been borrowing her mother’s when she needs to communicate. Well, I dug through a drawer and found this beauty I used back in Korea for a couple of years before I moved here (2015-2017 or so).

So, naturally, I wanted to reset the phone and delete my old apps, but before doing so, I went in and saved most of those old pictures. Some brought back painful memories, others were scenic reminders of the beauty of Korea, and most were about my old darting life. I’ll slap some of the better ones up here on the blog in the coming days, but today the focus will be on the ex-girlfriends (from the Philippines) I had during my final years in The Land of the Morning Calm.

This next picture stung when I saw it. Sohee and I were never more than friends, but she was a special friend all the same.

So with the phone charged and ready to go, it meant taking a solitary walk on the My Bitch trail this morning. I still get a little paranoid up in the hills on my own, imagining all the things that could potentially go wrong, but then again, if I have balls enough to cross the National Highway on a daily basis, especially after a few beers, hiking the Bitch trail is comparatively safe. Just watch your step, some of those drop-offs would be bone crushing.

After dropping off the phone, my path took me past my other mountain friend, MJ’s place.

And that’s where things stand with me as of now. Whatever happens next is all part of the adventure. It’s Saturday night, so I’m sure I’ll be spending some time with my true love.

To live is to fly
Low and high,
So shake the dust off of your wings
And the sleep out of your eyes;
Shake the dust off of your wings
And the tears out of your eyes.