Greetings from the Philippines. I made it home safe and as sound as I ever was, although getting here was quite the adventure. Assuming stress equates to adventure, that is. Living it was probably more interesting than retelling it here, but when has boring ever stopped me?

Up early and packed, a final complimentary breakfast, then down to the hotel lobby to check out, a call for a Grab car, then headed for the airport. Our Vietnam Airlines flight from Da Nang to Saigon (sorry, I’m old school, no Ho Chi Minh for me) was scheduled to depart at noon, arriving in Saigon at 1:30. Our connecting flight to Manila left at 3:45. I was a little nervous about that because there was little margin for error. It is what it is, and as Swan kept reminding me, our mantra was “Be Positive.”

So, we arrived at the Da Nang airport a comfortable two-and-a-half hours early. The check-in counters all had long lines, and I walked the length of the lobby looking for the one serving our flight. The signage was in Vietnamese, and I assumed the words were the names of destinations. I didn’t see any for Ho Chi Minh, but the last station said “all other destinations,” so I joined that line. A few minutes later, I noticed that the airline for this line was Viet Air. Shit. Yeah, I’m that dumb these days. So, we went back to the Vietnam Airlines section and took our spots at the end of the line. Oh, well. At least we were there early and had plenty of time.

When it was finally our turn to be served, I handed the agent our passports and flight information. She noted that our connection to Manila was with a different airline (Philippines Air). I acknowledged that and asked whether our bags would be checked through to our final destination. “Sorry, sir, that’s not possible.” Okay, so that means when we get to Saigon, I’ll have to retrieve my luggage from baggage claim and recheck in with Philippines Air. And then the agent told me, “You’ll be arriving in terminal three, and the connection is in terminal two.” Okay, how do I get to terminal two? You’ll have to take the airport bus. Shit, that two-hour window between flights was looking more and more insufficient. I guess the Vietnam Air agent noticed my distress. She put “priority tabs” on our luggage so that they would be offloaded early when we landed. Then she changed our seats to row twelve near the front of the plane so we could exit as quickly as possible. Hey, every minute saved helps. We thanked her for the assistance, then made our way through security and arrived at our gate more than an hour before boarding time.

I checked our gate at 11:30 and was distressed to see that no plane was there yet. I didn’t see any way they could deplane arriving passengers, get those of us waiting on board, and take off on time for our scheduled noon departure. When the plane finally pulled into the gate a few minutes later, it was empty. That helped, and Vietnam Air had us all aboard in time for a departure that was only 10 minutes late.

An uneventful flight, and I kept checking my watch to see if we would arrive as scheduled at 1:30. If wheels on the ground count as arrival, we made it on time. And then the fun began. Our plane taxied for several minutes before coming to a stop. Except we weren’t at a gate, one of those portable stairways was rolled up to the door for us to exit. Damn it, that means there is a bus ride to the terminal ahead, so much for being moved to the front of the plane.

The bus was uncomfortably packed to the gills (standing room only) before we finally departed for the terminal. I swear to God, that was the longest airport trek I’ve ever been on. From our parked plane, we travelled to the other side of the airport, and had to occasionally wait for passing airplanes to clear. It took almost ten minutes to reach the drop-off point. When we entered the terminal, we were in the baggage claim area, which was a relief. And then, in a first for me in a lifetime of air travel, we saw a Vietnam Air representative (a damn attractive one to boot) holding a sign with two names on it in English: mine and Swan’s.

She welcomed us in broken English and advised that she would be happy to assist us in getting to our connecting flight. Man, I really appreciated that! She walked with us to the baggage carousel, and our luggage was indeed amongst the first to arrive. Then she walked us to where we could catch the bus between terminals, but suggested we consider taking a taxi instead, since that was the quickest way to get there. Let’s do it! She took us to the taxi stand, and we thanked her for her help. The taxi driver wanted 250,000 dong ($9.50) for the ride, which seemed like a lot, but then he said it was a 6K ride. WTF? 6K between terminals? Fuck it, let’s go.

Wow, what a ride. We exited Terminal Three, drove through crazy Saigon traffic, and finally arrived at the Terminal Two drop-off point. Paid the driver, grabbed our bags, and made a dash to the Philippine Airlines check-in counter. Luckily, I had done an online check-in, so I was able to be at the front of the bag drop-off line. The agent promptly checked our bags and issued our boarding passes. Then she asked how long I’d be staying in the Philippines. I know you have visa-free entry to the PI for the first 29 days, so I told her I would be departing on February 16. Where to, she asked. I knew that was coming, so I pulled out my phone and showed her my e-ticket to Hong Kong for the 16th (the throwaway ticket cost me $16 at OnwardTicket.com). She punched in the numbers, and we were free to go. Yay! We made our flight!

Oh, except we still had to go through immigration and security. I had visions of my immigration nightmare upon arrival, but this time everything went smoothly. But, oh my, I’d never seen a longer line to get through security. That extra cushion of time I thought I had quickly evaporated. When we finally got through and redressed (shoes, belt, watch, pockets), we made a dash for our gate and heard the “last call” announcement. We answered, “We’re here!” and boarded.

And we had a very pleasant flight with Philippine Airlines. A whole row of seats to ourselves, a tasty snack, and two free beers! Well done!

We landed 30 minutes ahead of schedule, went through immigration without a problem, claimed our bags, and went out to find our driver. The traffic outside the terminal was insane. And Swan couldn’t reach her friend Bong (my new driver since Danny’s departure) on the phone. I suggested we move to the far end of the arrivals concourse, which was less crowded, and we’d be more easily seen there. Sure enough, Bong saw us and walked over. He went to get the car he had parked somewhere, and then minutes later, we were on the final leg of our journey home.

Traffic is notoriously bad in Manila, and apparently, on Friday nights, everybody wants to get out of town. Bong handled it as best he could, and we plodded on, finally arriving at the place I call home a little after 11 p.m. Yep, that was a LONG day for me, but it went a lot better than it might have, especially if we’d missed our connection.

Coincidentally, it was a mere 21 years ago that I took a journey that changed the rest of my life forever.

And from the October 2016 LTG archives, this post gives my assessment of Thailand after the first scouting visit as a potential retirement destination. As I have said, there are many paths in life to choose from, and we never know what might have been. Unless we get a do-over.

Since I’m back in the Philippines, let’s check in with the Filipina Pea for today’s YouTube video. I’m not sure I’d want to survive a zombie apocalypse, but just in case, here goes:

I’m not funnier now than I was in Vietnam, so take these as you will:

And a Saturday night in Barretto is on the horizon. Will all the bars seem new again? Only one way to find out.