This bar crawl was a real SOB

A promise made, a promise kept. I finally got around to documenting a Barretto bar crawl, the first of what I anticipate will be several “themed” adventures in exploring the various drinking establishments here in my little town. My motivation for last night’s adventure was this tiny scrap piece of paper:

My mission: Use this coupon to the max prior to its expiration (which was midnight). There are seven SOB bars. My plan was to do two beers (for the price of one) in each bar, then move on to the next until I had hit them all. That makes for fourteen beers, all told. Would I still be standing? Only one way to find out.

Because of a day-long power outage, I was getting a later start than normal. I usually leave the house around four, but it was nearly six o’clock before I headed out last night.

The view as I began my walk into town. It was completely dark by the time I reached the highway.
I still need to work on my map-making skills. For the purposes of this bar crawl, I hope my crude numbering of the bars will suffice.

I began my “crawl” at the junction of the National Highway and Baloy Beach road. I turned on my Map My Walk app, thinking that would show the distances between bars (they are all located on the highway). Unfortunately, that map came out looking like this:

I guess I needed to pause the tracker when I was sitting in the bar drinking. I’m not sure why it freaked out so much inside the bars; maybe the dancers made it go crazy. The time is accurate, though; it took me right at three and a half hours to complete my mission.

Anyway, the entire distance between all the bars was only around 1K. Every bar except one were on the same side of the highway, so I didn’t have to play frogger too much. I did the first three bars in the order I passed them on the street. Then I went to the most distant remaining venue and worked my way back to others. Enough about logistics; let’s get crawling!

Bar #1: Queen Victoria
The friendliest gal in the place!

They do have bargirls here, but they are not aggressive. I usually just sit at the bar and never even get approached. That’s fine with me. My favorite, TinTin, hasn’t been around my last few visits. The male bartender is friendly and provides prompt service, so no complaints there.

It’s a good venue for darts, although I no longer play.
They also have a pool table if that’s your thing.

Queen Vic’s claim to fame is that they feature live bands several nights a week. That’s not an attraction for me personally, but they have a nice setup for those who do:

I can hear just fine from my seat at the bar; thank you very much.

I understand that on weekends after the bands are done, they do a disco routine that lasts until four in the morning. Heh, I’m not into the disco scene, and I’m NEVER awake during those hours, but it’s the only disco in town, and I reckon it’s a good venue for meeting freelancers (the bargirls from around town that come get discounted drinks).

Bar #2: Whiskey Girl

Whiskey Girl is located almost directly across the highway from Queen Vic. Be careful when crossing!

This bar has a pool table as well.
And a stage with dancers, some of them were actually quite cute.
The view from my seat.
And the view of my favorite waitress.

I always enjoy the music here, especially now that I sit further away from the stage. I was the only customer during my brief visit, but it was still relatively early.

Back across the highway, and maybe a one-block walk, is the Alaska Club.

Bar #3: Alaska Club

Alaska is one of my sentimental favorites, it being the first bar I visited in the Philippines back in its Angeles City iteration.

Owner Jerry always welcomes his guests with a hearty greeting. I was also the only customer here last night.
Alaska is one of town’s most active pool venues, offering tournaments and league play several days a week.
And dancers for those who prefer that kind of entertainment.
Joy is my favorite Alaska dancer.
Always fun to chat with. Looks like we are both having a great time, doesn’t it?

Next, I walked up the highway about half a kilometer to visit Voodoo.

Bar #4: Voodoo

I rarely patronize this bar except when it hosts the SOB. It’s a small venue and only offers dancers and bar girls for entertainment. They have a pretty decent lineup of girls, but photography is not allowed, so you’ll need to check them out on your own.

Well, this gal posed with me, so there you go.
And, of course, my “regular” gal latched on to me as soon as I was through the door. She might be one of the oldest working girls in town, but she is actually very nice to sit with.

Walking back up the highway towards Baloy, maybe a hundred yards from Voodoo is the Hot Zone.

Bar #5: Hot Zone

Once again, I was the only customer. They had eight attractive dancers on stage, and I couldn’t help but think about what a hard job it must be to be an entertainer with no one to entertain.

As you can tell, I turned off my flash so I could discreetly snap some picks The girls in the bars tend to be shy about being photographed.

I felt sorry for the dancers and wanted to recognize their contribution to making the world a more beautiful place, so I handed out 50 peso notes to everyone on stage. There is a certain amount of pressure when you are the only best customer in the place.

The waitress brought me these which I took as a sign that they thought I must be nuts.

Yeah, those beers were beginning to kick in, but I was only half a block away from my next bar.

Bar #6: The Green Room

To my surprise, the place was packed. I was thinking it was just a slow night in town, but I guess folks were just in a Green Room frame of mind. One of the waitresses asked me “what are you doing here? It’s already nine o’clock.” Yes, my habits are well known to some in this little town.

I got a seat by the pool table and enjoyed watching the action.
The Green Room is one of two SOB bars that do not have dancers on stage (the other is Queen Victoria). They do employ numerous GROs (guest relations officers) and waitresses.

The also have a couple of gals that do back and shoulder massages. One of them I used before wanted to give one to me, and I said sure. But when I tried to take her picture she declined. That pissed me off a little, so I said, no picture, no massage. Yeah, I can be a bit of dick when I’ve had too much to drink.

I rather fancy this waitress, but I don’t interest her at all. Oh, well.

Time to move on, and my next and last stop was right next door. Didn’t even have to leave the building.

Bar #7: Wet Spot

It was also quite full of customers.

No one on the pool table, though.
Manager Brett keeping an eye on things.
I think I caught the dancers between sets or maybe they were with customers.

I drank my two beers here and congratulated myself on the successful conclusion of my bar crawl. It was actually kind of nice to be drinking with a purpose. Fourteen beers is pushing my limit, but I wasn’t stupid drunk or anything like that. A later start and a later finish, but probably not a significant amount of increased consumption.

And there you have the first in what will likely be a series of future themed accounts of my visits to the bars of Barretto. Hope you enjoyed it.

4 thoughts on “This bar crawl was a real SOB

  1. That was a beautiful evening shot to begin the proceedings.

    The two map graphics are hilarious for the scribbled numbers and the zigzaggy tracking lines. The tracking lines look like the path of a coke addict.

    In that first pool-table shot, there’s a girl sitting against the back wall. I couldn’t tell, at first, whether she was part of that huge photo or actually there in the room.

    Bar #2: Whiskey Girl shot—the one on the left is giving me guy vibes. Bakla?

    Did any of this have to do with the things you said were being foreshadowed?

  2. You are quite the observer of photo details. But I’m sure they are both real girls. News of a bakla working in a bar spreads fast, and I’m quite sure if Whiskey Girl had a Whiskey Girl-with-something-extra, I’d have heard about it by now. I didn’t pick up that vibe from her in person, either.

    Yeah, I couldn’t find the link you sent me on adding text/graphics to a Google map, so I just made due the best I could. The crazy map I don’t understand–what would make GPS readings go crazy like that?

    The bar crawl was one of the surprises; the other was the impromptu journey by bus out to San Marcelino and the longish (for me) 10K walk we did out there. The brownout was scheduled, so that wasn’t really a surprise.

  3. “…..and I couldn’t help but think about what a hard job it must be to be an entertainer with no one to entertain.”

    I have a similar thought if I go into place with live entertainment, and I am one of a few customers or the customers that are there are not paying attention. It makes me think – The Beatles first gigs were probably played in front of an audience like this.

  4. Yeah, it seems almost disrespectful to the performer to not at least give them your attention. On the other hand, the dancers aren’t very energized when the bar is devoid of customers.

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