And here I am, still trying to figure out what happens next and where I go from there. I guess time is on my side, so for now, I’m sticking with Option #1: riding it out. Things may not be ideal at the moment, but given my history, there’s no need to rush and make things worse. I have begun considering other options if circumstances warrant. I’m sorry, but I’m not able to be more specific than that for the time being.
My melancholy day included a Decay Dance.
A solo Saturday evening in Barretto.
And then I grabbed a trike and took my sorry ass home. I’m pathetic, I know. Hey, it’s who I am, you’d think I’d be used to it by now.
On to the October 2018 LTG archives. I was spending a lot of time at Treasure Island back in my early days in the Philippines. I’d become quite friendly with the staff, and when Jessa turned 30, I took them all out for a movie and birthday dinner. And yes, I got my chance with Jessa about a year later, but of course, I fucked it up. Jessa and I are still friends on Facebook, and she seems to be doing well, having found a new love and life in Subic. Kat found work on a cruise ship, met an Aussie bloke, got married, and now lives in the land down under. RuRu is an OFW working in Qatar.
Today’s YouTube video resonates. Most expats didn’t run away; they chased a dream. Of course, some dreams don’t come true, but at least we tried and made the best of it. My favorite quote from a John Greenleaf Whittier poem sums it up: “God pity us both, and pity us all, who vainly the dreams of youth recall. For of all the sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these: it might have been.” Damn, how did I remember that line?
Time out for humor:
And life goes on. I’m going to make the best of it.
Seems Swan has left you for another man. Sorry to hear it but there’s plenty of fish out there.
Jackson, no, she’s still here. Physically, anyway.
Let her go, mate.
Clean slate…pack up and move to Thailand or Cambodia
I am stuck here in Angeles because of the Mrs and my bar, but were I not taking those into consideration, I would be in Siem Reap or Hua Hin in a flash.
It is a fucking shithole here…..scammy, mercenary people, pisspoor infrastructure…..the shit you do for a slight improvement in English language skills or a marginally easier visa.
You have, what? 10 years left? Don’t spend it in this fucking dump.
Dr Greg Williamson, John can surely make his own decision as to where he wants to reside without you throwing your mildly-salted peanuts in the ring.
Let’s keep the looney tunes comments where they belong – in the funny books and not here thank you.
Now let’s all remain in control here. No need to lose our tempers and look like kindergarteners thank you all very much.
Yeah,! You’re right Dr. Greg. John you should leave fucking Swan. She’s dump to you. Find someone else, better than Swan. You should move to Combodia or Thailand maybe your life Is there.
Anonymous, there is no one better for me than Swan.
Gary, Dr. Greg makes some fair points based on his personal experience. Our paths are not the same, and I’ll stick with what I know and love.
Dr. Greg, nope, not ready to give up. And if I ever do, I’m too old to start over in another country. I might consider a place like Pundaquit or maybe La Union, but they are both a tad too isolated. Barretto was and is a good fit for me.
I agree that Angeles is a shithole. Even as a tourist, I couldn’t handle more than a few days there at a time. Do you mind if I ask what bar?
Hopefully it doesn’t come to that, but not quite sure what you mean about being “too old to start over in another country.”
What deep ties do you have in the PI that would preclude that? You don’t have family there, you don’t have a business or property there. Yeah, you have friends there, but they don’t appear to be “go to the ends of the earth with them” type of friends. More of a superficial “if I see you in the bar, I will say hi to you” friends.
You have a familiarity with Baretto and that is about it. I get it, change is tough. I hate change, but it often is not as bad as imagined. What does starting over mean to you? A new place to rent? New trails to hike? New bars to hang out at? Different supermarket to shop at? None of those seem insurmountable, even if they are in a different country.
Anyway, I hope it doesn’t come to that, but moving seems to be less of a big deal than you think.
I have mentioned before, but you need to get out of the SE Asia bubble for a bit. Do a road trip across the US. Take a tour in Europe. Go on a cruise. Etc.
Brian, I just don’t have the passion or desire to do all the things that are required when you start over. Honestly, I wouldn’t even want to move within the PI. I’m old and fading and don’t have much spirit of adventure remaining. That said, I COULD do it if moving were my best option. I just don’t want to.