And so, Christmas has arrived at last. Here’s what went down on the eve of this momentous day.

I completed the rounds of giving envelopes to the security and maintenance staff of the subdivision. They are certainly deserving and seemed appreciative. Yeah, when you add in the bargirls and my sponsorships, I burned through some cash this season. No regrets, though. It feels good to help those less fortunate, even in a small way. One big project remaining next week– the Aeta village outreach our hiking group will be part of. Fifty+ families for that event, then a hike to some waterfalls with the village chief as our guide. Looking forward to that.

Just before I headed out for my morning walk yesterday, I got a message from “Maria,” one of my former “friends with benefits” program participants. I’d been ignoring her pleas for help these past couple of months because she struck me as being selfish, dishonest, and generally unworthy. But in the spirit of the season, I responded to her “Merry Christmas” message with a the same to you. And, of course, she wanted help so she could provide a Christmas meal for her children. I had no interest in her providing me with any “services,” but I figured I’d contribute 1000 pesos so her family could enjoy a happy holiday. She lives in the squatter village right outside Alta Vista, so I told her to be out on the street when I walked by in fifteen minutes. There she was, waiting as I approached. Six months pregnant by the way she looked. She said she was “shy” to tell me. I just shook my head, gave her the money, wished her well, and walked on. I doubt she even knows who the father is. Hmm, let me do the math. Nope, not me!

After my hike, I got busy in the kitchen.

Now, I do my baking the old-fashioned way. From a box. But that doesn’t mean I don’t occasionally go off-recipe. For this cake, I added raisins and walnuts to the mix. The cake tasted fine, and I like the texture and crunchiness of the walnuts. Now, I like raisins just fine, but I guess because of their weight, they wound up on the bottom crust of the cake. When I removed the cake from the pan, some of those old grapes were left behind.

So, a few days ago, the Snack bar owner sent a message inviting me to the Christmas party. And then, early yesterday morning, the gal running the party messaged me asking if I would be a judge for some contest they were having. I asked what time the party started, and she said 4:00 and the contest would begin at 5:00 or so. Alright then, sounds like a plan. I brought the brownies and some gift envelopes.

So, I don’t know what went wrong, but the party had not started by 5:30, and I was getting restless. Yeah, I just wasn’t feeling it.

I handed out a couple of envelopes to my favorites and moved on to It Doesn’t Matter. A couple of more beers and an envelope for Agnes there. Joy messaged me asking if “Santa” was going to visit Hideaway, and I decided, “why not?” The bar is closed today (my regular feeding day), so I fed the gals last night instead.

I also wanted to say Merry Christmas to my favorites at Cheap Charlies, so that was my next stop. Beers and lady drinks flowed, and I handed out a couple more envelopes. I had one left to give away, and I wanted to reward my waitress at Wet Spot. That required dodging some traffic on the highway, but I lived to tell about it.

Daddy Dave showed up, and we had a pleasant conversation as we imbibed our alcoholic beverages. The clock struck 9:00, and that meant time for me to bail, so I caught a trike for home. Gave the driver 150 pesos for the ride and wished him a Merry Christmas. He seemed pleased with that.

And now it’s Christmas. I’ve got a lunch buffet reservation at Mango’s, and I need to head out that way soon. But I busied myself in the kitchen again, preparing my only remaining Christmas tradition: my Aunt Pat’s Recipe World Famous Fruit Salad.

Speaking of which, drinking alone (even with a bargirl beside you, you are still emotionally alone) can sometimes feel depressing. And I really wasn’t happy about the way the party thing worked out (I got a message from a friend around 8:00 showing the party in full swing), but upon reflection, it was probably for the best that I wasn’t there. That’s the past; I need to keep it there.

Anyway, time to head to Mango’s for my Christmas meal. And after that? Well, I think I’m going to throw caution to the wind and drink like a madman this afternoon. I’m not going quit until I’m comfortably numb. We’ll see how that works out for me.

There is no pain you are receding
A distant ship smoke on the horizon
You are only coming through in waves
Your lips move but I can't hear what you're saying
When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown
The dream is gone
I have become comfortably numb