Comments Posted By John McCrarey
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Hmm, maybe my comment box is different since I’m logged in as an admin. Yep, I just checked. The comment box on the post does not have the tabs I mentioned. Sorry for the confusion!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 19/September/2023 @ 7:05 am
Sometimes when I’m hiking, especially in the morning, I’ll walk through a seemingly invisible spiderweb. If I ever saw one of those hand-sized spiders, I’d likely shit my pants. Of course, now that I know they are out there I’ll have one more potential answer to the age-old “What’s the worst that could happen?” question as I begin a trek into the unknown.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 19/September/2023 @ 6:05 am
“The ravages of age on the mind.”
Welcome to my world! You’ve only just begun, rookie!You really don’t have to use HTML code; those tabs at the top of the comment box give you the standard options like boldface and italics.
As for the phrasing of being a dildo for a giant, I got your meaning the first time, but I can see how the rewrite clears up any ambiguity. At least you are not guilty of the dreaded comma splice!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 19/September/2023 @ 5:59 am
Interesting background on the “Buddy Fucker” term, I wasn’t aware of that context and always thought of it as a sexual perversion gag. His girlfriend is named “Fuck Buddy.” Anyway, he’s a good guy, a veteran, and he also worked as a contractor in some Middle East war zones, so I expect, in Hash fashion, the name is intended to be insulting/sarcastic and not based in reality.
I’m not sure it is so much about prudery, but I don’t want to be handing out cookies to children wearing a shirt with an erect penis displayed. Call it what you will. 🙂 Sometimes I feel shy wearing my “Goddamn ATM” shirt, thinking some may be offended by the curse word, but that doesn’t stop me (I wore it on my walk yesterday, in fact). Once, a trike driver started laughing and gave me a high five, but otherwise, no stranger has commented. The bargirls that saw it (or the picture on my Facebook) think it is funny.
Yeah, that’s the problem: people want to act like science is a religion. I hate the term “the science is settled” because that’s the opposite of what science is supposed to be all about. Some of these memes I share do not accurately reflect my views, but I do want to get the word out so people will resist the next wave of mandates. It’s also nice to make liberal heads explode.
What? Worcester isn’t a town in the Shire? Who knew? I’m sure I pronounce wrong, more of a WAR sound. I rarely use the sauce so never have to ask for it, thankfully!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 18/September/2023 @ 8:20 am
Kev, yes, when I watched that video, I thought that sounded like the advice I’ve heard from you. Understanding the wisdom of the words is one thing; changing your behavior accordingly is a whole other level of challenge. I’ve recognized for quite some time that the common denominator in all my failed relationships has been me. Until I change, nothing will. That damn samsara has me by the balls and won’t let go, it seems. Maybe it is stubbornness or stupidity (or both) that keeps me on this road to failure. I’ve also come to see that selfishness is a major character flaw that I’m going to have to learn to overcome if I truly desire success in my quest for love. I won’t lie, though, when I read the words ”I just want someone who will take care of me,” I felt myself nodding my head and thinking, “maybe that’s good enough.” Perhaps I’m hopeless and unworthy.
I should be getting royalties from that Groening cartoon. I’m going to take the next step of sharing a roof with Swan and see what happens. But you are right; if I don’t change, nothing will. I know what I need to do; time will tell if I am willing and able to escape the samsara and free myself from the cycle of failure. I have my doubts, but I’ll give making the needed and necessary changes in my thinking and actions another shot. Win or lose, it is on me. I know that now.
I sincerely do appreciate your advice and encouragement, even if it appears I’m incapable of following it. I have a better understanding of what I need to do to achieve the outcome I desire. Thanks for that.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 18/September/2023 @ 7:42 am
Soju, I’m glad you were able to dodge the vaxx bullet. Had I still been working as a re-employed annuitant, I probably would have just re-retired. It would have been a tougher call if I wasn’t retirement eligible, but I don’t think they could have successfully fired me. They would likely have put me in an LWOP (leave without pay) status, and I would have filed an appeal with the Merit Systems Protection Board. Glad I didn’t have to deal with that. As it turned out, I was “forced” to get the vaxx anyway. Under immigration rules, I have to leave the country every three years. My time was up, but the rules in place at the time required a vaxx to re-enter the country. So, I had to choose between the jab and leaving my adopted home. I decided to stay.
As for the SOB, there are no set criteria for the judging. I personally look for creativity, coordination, and enthusiasm. I think some of my fellow judges use a “who’s sexiest” standard. The performances with ass shaking in your face are often rated higher than what I would score them. Still, the outcomes always seem close with no obvious bias. Some people are calling for a system where the winners rotate week-to-week, which is ridiculous–it is supposed to be a competition. If that ever happens, I will end my association with the SOB.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 18/September/2023 @ 7:01 am
I’m so lazy I’d rather use a comma than a semi-colon. Apparently. My problem is I think about what I’m saying (writing), not how I’m saying it. That’s how I missed the comma splice.
There have been a couple of power-hungry mayors doing stupid mask mandates, but so far, I’m not hearing rumblings of impositions of stupidity beyond that. Here’s hoping it stays that way.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 17/September/2023 @ 5:56 am
I’d much prefer to fill the space IN the hookers rather than WITH them. Just sayin’.
Thanks for the videos. I will never attempt to make birria-style at home, but seeing how it is done is interesting. I’ll definitely be going back for more of John’s.
Yes, I did indeed misspell “oficina.” I know it is a one “f’ word, but lots of folks are calling the bar “The Office,” and my muddled brain mixed it up somehow. I’ll go back and fix it.
Oh, I think you’d enjoy a brief visit anyway. A different culture to explore, some interesting hikes (morning time when it is cooler), and investigating the food. The restaurants all serve beer, so both of our interests could be satisfied. Hell, we could hang out at John’s place and eat tacos! Lots of other interesting places to see, too. Most days, I don’t even notice the heat; I rarely even use my aircon now. I guess I’m acclimated, but I really don’t think it is as bad as you imagine. If you ever change your mind, I’ll be happy to show you around.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 16/September/2023 @ 7:22 am
Once I’ve hit all the bars again, I’ll update the rankings at least. In the meantime, the research continues!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 16/September/2023 @ 6:42 am
There is no mushroom culture here that I’ve observed. The log in the photo is lying randomly on the roadside amongst the usual litter. How those mushrooms came to call it home is a mystery.
Scott’s ankle seems completely healed now. We tease him sometimes about being slow, but honestly, he takes a lot of the photos I share here. That takes time and makes you fall behind. I think I will start adding an “SP” on his shots to properly acknowledge his contributions.
Beer, pecan pie, and ice cream are my carby addictions. But I’m going to continue enjoying my life while I have it.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 15/September/2023 @ 7:15 am
There may be some ongoing work, but the inside things that I consider essential (like hot water in the shower) are already done. It shouldn’t be a problem.
I’ve arranged for some guys with a truck to move my stuff on the 30th. Between now and then, I just need to pack everything up in boxes.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 14/September/2023 @ 6:04 am
Regarding a detour, we’ll have to see if we can find a walkaround, but as of now, the only way through is over or under a barbwire fence. We’ll figure something out eventually.
I didn’t sample the boob cake, but I had a slice of the chocolate one, which was excellent.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 13/September/2023 @ 6:43 am
The death penalty was abolished here in 1987. Given the insanely slow processing of court cases and innumerable nonbailable offenses, a false accusation can put you in jail for a long time without a trial. A standard piece of advice for newbies here is don’t piss off a Filipino–nothing good will come of it. Better off making friends with the police than the lawyers and avoid arrest altogether.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 12/September/2023 @ 6:07 am
I think having six bars in one place is a good thing without the redundancy that normally happens when you have several businesses under one roof selling the same product. The difference being that while all six venues sell alcoholic beverages, they are unique in other ways. Bars tend to have a “personality” that attracts a certain customer base, and those customers then attract other like-minded folk, creating a comfortable “at home” feeling among the guests. I call that the “vibe” of a place, hard to define, but it is a welcoming feeling that makes you glad to be there. I think the theme song to “Cheers” that I posted captures some of the vibe I’m talking about. The bars are different in practical terms as well. You have three bars with dancers if that’s your thing. Wet Spot also has a lot of waitresses and GROs/massage girls looking to keep you company. Next door at Alaska, there are fewer girls overall, but it has a friendly, welcoming feel. The Green Room bills itself as a “sports bar,” but it is a lot like Wet Spot without the dancers–I get swamped by thirsty girls whenever I’m there. Sloppy Joe’s is what I’d call a hangout place; people come to sit, drink, and bullshit among themselves in a pleasant, laid-back atmosphere. La Oficina is the new kid on the block, a smallish go-go bar with a more intimate feeling than its larger counterparts. BarCelona would also fit in the sports bar category (by that, I mean showing events on large-screen TVs) and offering weekly pool tournaments. I like the open-air rooftop atmosphere, which makes it unique among the six bars of the Maze.
“Who could that be in the reflection?”
I hope it doesn’t reflect poorly on me…
Yes, I did notice the ambiguity of “bi-weekly” when I wrote that. He said he came a couple of times a month, and I briefly considered “bi-monthly,” but that felt like once every two months. I probably should have just not gone “bi” at all. Not that there is anything wrong with it.
It’s not the Spanish of “La Oficina” so much as it is the irrelevance as a bar moniker. I mean, you can make a joke about The Office (wife screams, “Where are you?” and you say, still at the office), but that doesn’t translate so well. Plus, Oficina is kinda hard to say, especially after a few beers.
I hadn’t seen the DeSantis fake smile clip, but yeah, I see the resemblance. Looking back at the photos, I can see a pretty clear progression from sober to drunk as the night went on.
Yep. the t-shirt performed well–good fit, lightweight, and sweat-absorbing.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 11/September/2023 @ 8:11 am
“when you’re the leader, do people try to walk ahead of you?”
Normally, yes. Leader is not precisely the right word for it. If it is left to me to pick the trail, I’ll say something like, “Okay, we’ll go up behind Marian Hills, circle back to Four Corners, then take the tires down to Columban.” Folks will walk at their own pace, then periodically wait for us slowpokes to catch up (it is supposed to be a group hike), and then continue on to the next stop. Yesterday, Gary and I stuck together because we walk at a similar pace.
Yes, at the SOB, “home-field advantage” does exist, perhaps more than it should. The home bar goes first, and as a judge, I give their performance a score that sets a high bar for the others to try and exceed. That does happen occasionally. I thought it did this week, but the other judges didn’t see it that way.
It was a bit of a surprise to have a package I wasn’t expecting delivered. I guess I’d forgotten I’d ordered it. I’ll be taking the shirt out for a test walk this morning.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 10/September/2023 @ 7:56 am
Yeah, I cut John some slack; he’s got a lot on his plate these days. I’ve seen the ads where he is trying to hire, including paying higher wages than many of his competitors. I’ve heard he is a strict boss (don’t be late!), which may explain some of his turnover issues. Anyway, I hope it all works out. I’d hate to lose that menu!
I hadn’t really thought about that “yum” versus “yummy” thing. I don’t say “yum” all the time; it’s more of a slangy/lazy/informal rendering not intended to be grammatically correct. That said, it’s not just me using it that way; I’ve heard it before. I think it goes into the “technically wrong, but common usage” category. Like ain’t.
I guess Lucky thought it was ballsy enough for me to publish such drivel!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 09/September/2023 @ 6:35 am
Yep, mama is a special lady. K-pop is big here, so maybe he is in a band.
And yes, I remember living like a King (or was it a rock star?) in my Anjeong-ri palace. Best of all, it was on the government’s dime!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2023 @ 5:56 pm
Kev, regarding the wires, I had to go back and look at the pic again because I hadn’t even noticed them. It’s just the norm here.
Yikes, and no thanks to rucking. Sawmill ain’t nothing compared to that!
It was good to reread the review; I’d actually forgotten that one. I think Nerissa’s fantasy of a life in France or the UK is nothing like the reality she’ll discover. But life is for learning.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2023 @ 7:10 am
Yeah, I respect her courage, but I think she needs to think things through. If the guy doesn’t respect her and her culture enough even to visit here, I’m not sure he will be someone to be trusted when she is there on her own. And I think her vision of what life in Europe is like is a fantasy. She’s a grown woman, though, and can make her own decisions. And live with the consequences.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2023 @ 6:57 am
The questions you raise in the second paragraph are exactly the ones I’m asking myself. I’ve chosen to take a wait-and-see approach for a few more weeks. I’ve pulled back emotionally, so she will have to convince me that whatever we have together is mutually beneficial. I really am in a place where I am okay with being alone, especially if drama and stress are the alternatives.
As for the sex aspect, I sometimes feel that maybe she just has no interest. That one night we spent together out of town, she told me “she didn’t like it” when I attempted to initiate a coupling. I think the fact that I’m still around is evidence that sex isn’t my primary motivation here. Don’t get me wrong, I like sex and can’t imagine a relationship without it, but I’d like to see if we can connect better emotionally as a priority. And yes, that would make the sex even better!
I might not know Swan well enough to know her best traits, but the ones I’ve observed included generosity, loyalty, caring nature, shared taste in music, honesty, intelligence, seriousness, cleanliness (she doesn’t even like dirty words), goal-oriented, and family-focused (even if she doesn’t have kids, which is a plus from my perspective). That’s ten, subject to change if and when she lets me close enough to learn more.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 11/September/2023 @ 2:50 pm
Honestly, Kevin, this is not about sex. Yeah, that’s important too and I’m not willing to be in a long-term relationship without it, but it is not the sex I’m missing at this point. I’m craving companionship, intimacy, and the feeling that I’m a priority in Swan’s life. Again, maybe she’s just different, but she never opens up about what’s on her mind or in her heart. Whenever I try to find out what is happening with her, she gives me some variation of the “be patient” response. I’m in full wait-and-see mode now and leave it entirely up to her whether she wants to see or talk to me. Sometimes, a full day goes by without a word beyond “good night.” If I ask what she was doing all day, she says we can talk about it over coffee in the morning. It’s weird. I feel lonelier now than I did before I met her. Granted, that may very well change when we are living in the same house. I’m willing to wait and see.
Another concern is that she doesn’t seem to share an interest in the things I enjoy. She did consent to hike with me one day a week, but only the two of us. I’d love to have a girlfriend who does the Hash, but I understand that’s not for everyone (some of the rituals are over the top). But it would be nice if she would join the group hikes occasionally–I envy the couples who participate. And I get that she doesn’t like bars and wouldn’t expect her to hang out in that environment. Still, I rarely get invited to join her in any other activities we might share. I’m not so needy that I expect her to always be by my side; I think time apart is good in a healthy relationship, but she makes no discernable effort to find ways to spend time with me. In fact, even on our “scheduled” times, she will cancel if she gets invited to do something else with friends.
So again, my issue isn’t about the lack of sex. If it turns out she isn’t interested in having an intimate relationship, we can settle for friendship. It may be as simple as she doesn’t find me attractive or interesting. I won’t “fire” her because she is not up for being my lover. I don’t fuck the help anyway.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2023 @ 7:36 am
Kev, sorry that my spaghetti-eating method has triggered you. It’s just how I’ve always done it, and it seems much more efficient. I did look around as others ate, and it appears that only I have found the pleasure inherent in simplicity. True story: I used to have staff in Philadelphia, and on one trip, they took me out to eat at a local family-owned Italian restaurant for dinner. One of my counterparts told the female owner I was a spaghetti cutter. She thought he was joking. When I confessed it was true, she looked disgusted, shook her head, and said, “No spaghetti for you!” And she was serious.
“Why do I feel as if I’ve read almost these exact words before?”
Because my love life is like “Groundhog Day.” Anyway, when we are living under one roof, things will change. My feelings now are likely a manifestation of my selfishness and inability to put Swan’s needs first. But I know what I want, and if it turns out Swan can’t or won’t provide it, then I’m prepared to accept that we are not destined to be lovers. I’m not going to settle for a passionless relationship–I’d rather be alone.
It’s good the police are on the lookout for that missing comma!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2023 @ 7:58 am
Thanks for the link; very interesting and something I’d never considered before. I wonder why.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2023 @ 7:35 am
Brian, honestly, even at the friend level, I’m feeling ignored. But perhaps this is my test. We’ll see what happens come October when we are living in the same house.
With the exception of hotel bars, every bar allows waitresses to have a drink with a customer. I’d guess 50% or more employ GROs whose job is to drink with customers. I define “gogo bars” as ones with dancers, and that’s about 25% of the total bars in town.
I’ve often offered that tip instead of the lady drink option, and the girls almost always prefer the drink. I asked them why since the tip was worth more than the commission and was told that they have to meet a lady drink quota every night (or sometimes a week) or their salary is reduced. Also, some bars require all tips to be shared.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2023 @ 7:33 am
Drain, I’m not really ascribing bad motivations for Swan’s actions; she seems sincere and is trying to be honest about her distancing. And as she is quick to point out, we’ll be living under the same roof soon, and we’ll have lots of time to share together. Whether that leads to more intimacy and emotion remains to be seen.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2023 @ 7:14 am
“you’ve long been a man who follows his, uh, baser appetites.”
And this is where all those bad habits began. My first love, Karen, moved two hours south to San Diego, but I never technically broke up with her. I’d drive down to visit once a month or so. And then I met Gail; she was just a natural fit, like dating your best friend. I should have cut the strings to Karen and gone on with my new life, but no, I wasn’t that smart. After one visit with Karen, she wanted to ride back to Orange County with me. When we got to my apartment, I was surprised to see my roommate was having a party. When Karen and I walked through the door, we were face-to-face with Gail, who was a guest at the party. Talk about awkward. At that moment, I realized that Gail was who I wanted, and I did break up with Karen for good the next day. It was too late, though, to fix things with Gail.
My love life has been a Groundhog Day of fuck ups ever since.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 06/September/2023 @ 6:53 am
Thanks, Soju. I reminded of the great Joe Walsh refrain: Everybody’s so different, I haven’t changed.
I didn’t like how 8-tracks would click over right in the middle of the song, causing a brief but irritating pause. Plus, with cassettes, I could make my own mix tapes from my extensive album collection. Nothing is more romantic than giving your girl a cassette with all your favorite love songs.
Thanks for reminding me of the song. Indeed, a dreamer lives forever!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 06/September/2023 @ 6:34 am
I think the gals might like my unbathed smell. I’ve had several sniffing my clothes and complimenting the smell of the fabric softener my helper uses. “Is that Downey? Nice!” Honestly, I find it irksome because I wear expensive Armani cologne, and they never seem to notice that smell.
I don’t eat a lot of local delicacies, but balut is one I will NEVER sample. Just the thought of eating an aborted duck fetus grosses me out.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 06/September/2023 @ 6:39 am
Ah, yeah, I agree Jana works much better.
I didn’t mean to imply that the lady drink experience is always negative or disappointing. It can be sometimes, and I intend to overdo it when it’s not, so I just need to the point where it is a treat for special occasions.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 05/September/2023 @ 7:36 am
«« Back To Stats PageRe: reversed image. Yeah, I had that backward. Didn’t think it through. Again.
Actually, with the bargirls, I’m paying for some companionship and company when I want it, and the rest of the time, I’m just feeling sorry for the girls who are working hard to make a living. I wouldn’t want their job! I’m alone most of the time in my life, so getting out and having a drink with someone is about the only socializing I do. As to “bar guys,” well, when I run into one of the Hashers in a bar, we’ll drink, chat, and buy each other drinks. We usually don’t have a bargirl around in that scenario. As for craving female attention–not really. Attention that you pay for is pretty much unsatisfying. I often choose bars without GROs so I can drink in peace. The problem is, after all this time, my regulars expect a drink when I visit the bar, and it kills my buzz to disappointment. I’m cutting way back (probably half of what I used to buy), so it’s a weaning process.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 05/September/2023 @ 3:47 am