Almost exactly 24 hours after she arrived, my surprise visitor departed. Perhaps she will return again in a year like last time. Well, maybe small doses of Lyn are the best medicine. And I didn’t have cause to title this post “Vile Lyn,” so there’s that. Anyway, bottom line up front: Lyn is cute and sexy, fun to be around, and doesn’t seem to be all that attracted to me. For example, she didn’t even sleep with me (when I awoke this morning, she was on the couch). I can’t claim to be disappointed regardless of how much as I wanted to do the deed because I had the impression from the moment she asked if she could visit that my role was to provide lodging and entertainment, but romance wasn’t part of the equation. That proved to be the case.
Lyn arrived earlier than expected, around 0900. She told me she needed time away from her kids (16 and 10) because their recent behavior has been stressful. When we met last year, she seemed to enjoy hiking, and I thought that would be a nice way to fill some hours, and it is also a good remedy for stress. I was disappointed when she told me she hadn’t brought footwear or clothes suitable for a hike. I figured we could remedy that with a quick visit to the local DiviMart store. We found a top, a pair of pants, and some shoes in her size, and the total bill came to less than a thousand pesos. Heh, I won’t vouch for the quality of the gear. We headed back to my place, she changed into her new clothes, and we headed out for a hike.
Lyn took a nap when we got home and slept for three hours. I’d put some meatballs in the crockpot before she arrived, and they were ready to go by the time she woke up. Some mixed veggies and garlic bread rounded out the meal. When we finished eating, it was beer o’clock on a Saturday evening, so we headed into town.
Since Lyn lives in Angeles City, I thought visiting the floating bar would be something different for her. We made the journey to Baloy Beach on foot, and she took my hand in hers as we walked. I was thinking how sweet that was when she said, “It is the only way I can keep up with you when we walk.”
When we left the floater, I took Lyn to Johan’s, and she finally got the coffee she wanted. There was a pool tournament taking place, and Lyn is a big fan, so she enjoyed watching some of the play. After Johan’s, I took her for a beach walk, thinking McCoy’s might be our next stop, but it was Saturday night, and the videoke was going full blast. We both said, “No, thanks,” and kept going.
We grabbed a trike, and I had the driver drop us at Whiskey Girl. I grabbed some seats near the pool table and called my favorite waitress, Jen, over to join us. I know Jen likes playing pool too, so I challenged her to play Lyn to earn a lady drink. They played three close games, but Lyn was the victor in all of them. Once the playing was done, I could tell Jen was uncomfortable sitting with us, and before long, she told me that she needed to go serve one of her regulars. Okay then, bye! Jen did message me this afternoon to apologize, saying she didn’t want to cause trouble with my new girlfriend. I explained that Lyn was not my girlfriend but that I understood.
We went home after Whiskey Girl. Lyn didn’t want a smoothie or other dessert, saying she wasn’t hungry. She revealed that she was worried about her kids, and it was pretty obvious she regretted her apparently rash decision to leave town without them. It was my bedtime, but Lyn said she would stay up a while longer and call home. Alright then, good night.
As I mentioned, Lyn was asleep on the couch when I got up this morning. She told me she wasn’t up for a walk but would like to take a swim before she headed back to AC. I suggested we have breakfast at Treasure Island, and she could use the pool there. Lyn surprised me when she told me that she doesn’t like chlorinated pools, preferring the “natural” water of the bay. I almost laughed out loud at that, having seen what flows into the bay from filthy rivers. But who am I to rain on her parade? So, I told her after the dog walk, we could have breakfast somewhere on the beach, and she could swim to her heart’s content.
As promised, I took Lyn to Mango’s so we could eat and she could swim.
Lyn caught a Jeepney in front of Mangos and made it home safely. Before she departed, I asked if she needed anything, and she said she was fine. Then I tried to give her 1000 pesos as a Mother’s Day present, and she wouldn’t take it. I’m not going to lie, that hurt my feelings, and I considered it borderline rude. I thought things over while walking after she left and decided to let it go as just another indicator that whatever her feelings may be, she does not want anything I might have to offer.
Noted.
Maybe she’s like you in that all she wants is “companionship,” the difference being that she has a clearer idea of what “companionship” means.
So what does the “vial” in “Vial Lyn” mean, aside from being a way to avoid writing “vile”? If you’re going for a pun on “violin,” well, the pun has to at least mean something to be a pun, yeah? Otherwise, it’s just fun with phonetics.
Hmm John, I have a different take. Someone refusing to take money is IMO not a bad thing. I dont think it is rude at all that she refused money from you. I would be flattered that she was happy enough to spend time with me, even if it seems definitely in the “friend zone”, and wanted nothing in return. :shrug
I think Brian’s on to something. Lyn just wanted to hang, and she thinks you’re cool enough to just chill with. I’d take that as a plus. No monetary bullshit, nothing transactional—just hangin’.
It’s the age-old question, though: can a man and woman just be friends, or does friendship inevitably turn into something else over time? For some people, especially the sex-addicted, there’s always the expectation of sex lurking somewhere in the relationship’s subtext. This is aided (or exacerbated) by the fact that we guys are generally wired to think about only one thing all day long, so this subtext isn’t unnatural: it’s why the friends-or-not question exists to begin with. But plenty of guys who aren’t as obsessed with the question will affirm that it is possible to have female friends who are just friends. (Full disclosure, I have only one very distant female friend who lives in England! And yes, she’s spoken for. And she’s not a very close friend, but we banter sometimes.)
Anyway, back to Brian’s point, I’d say that her non-acceptance of money shows both her independence and maybe also her boundaries, but positively, it definitely shows that she sees you as cool enough, and perhaps safe enough, to hang with. A woman like that could be a font of information if you find yourself pursuing someone else and needing feminine wisdom (but I’m not suggesting you merely use her!). Trying to take this friendship in a physical direction would probably just ruin it.
I’m not going to assume an agenda here, but would like to see her return.
Brian and Kev, yeah, I’m coming around to your way of thinking regarding the gift rejection. The only negative here was my reaction–Lyn can’t be faulted for her honesty and independence. She’s different than most of the women I meet, and I need to adjust my attitude accordingly.
As to the larger issues associated with my ability to maintain a platonic male-female friendship, I’ve managed that in the past. I don’t know that I would choose that with Lyn, although I’m not really in a position to expect otherwise. Where things might go is entirely on her, but the reality is she lives two hours away, and her children are her priority. Perhaps being her “escape from stress” is the only role for me to play in her life, take it or leave it.
Whether that role would involve sex is also TBD. I’m not the horndog I used to be, but I am also very attracted to her hot bod. I didn’t push it this weekend, but I’m not sure I’d enjoy resisting those urges over the long haul. I mean, if we continue to meet once a year, no big deal. But monthly sexless rendezvous is probably outside the scope of my ability to enjoy.
And about that apparently failed pun–the vial in the title was a reference to the small doses of being with Lyn I experienced. Of course, any joke you have to explain isn’t funny. I’ll try and do better in the future.
the vial in the title was a reference to the small doses of being with Lyn I experienced
Ah. Got it now. Yeah, that needed explaining.
I didn’t push it this weekend, but I’m not sure I’d enjoy resisting those urges over the long haul. I mean, if we continue to meet once a year, no big deal. But monthly sexless rendezvous is probably outside the scope of my ability to enjoy.
It doesn’t always have to be about sex. Try the friend thing. You might be surprised. If you hate being known as a player, here’s your chance to avoid being one.