Well, rather than repeat myself, let me just share what I posted on Facebook this morning:

Got stopped by the police last night for being out after curfew. They asked where I’d been and where I was going. I went all American on them, yelling about me being a free man who can come and go as I please.

They arrested me and I just now got released from a holding cell. I have been advised that deportation hearings will be initiated as soon as possible. It looks like my time in the Philippines is coming to an end.

There should be a day on the calendar dedicated to fools like me.

What can I say? Those who play must pay. Speaking of paying, here’s the latest from one of the biggest bar owners in town:

Hello all. I’ll be assisting Moe in managing a new business venture which will be available to all at our soft opening this Wednesday at 6 PM in the Paradise Hotel. Now before you go thinking too much into this please let me explain how it works.

Due to the COVID-19 social distancing restrictions and most of our staff returning to the provinces, we are offering the opportunity to spend two hours with a top of the line, ultra realistic sex doll. You’ve heard how realistic they look and feel. Totally lifelike size (about 5’1) lifelike weight (about 90 lbs). Absolutely state of the art silicone silky life-like skin, real hair, eyelashes, eyebrows, pussy hair and totally realistic feeling vagina, ass, and mouth. She can bend into any position you desire and each doll comes wearing a removable sexy see-through babydoll and panties.
We have 5 brand new, never used dolls. 3 are Filipina’s with brown skin and long silky black hair, 1 is a Caucasian blonde and 1 is a red head ladyboy for those customers who would like to take a walk on the wild side.

How it works: You can contact Lyn, our receptionist at the Paradise front desk and ask for a doll room. You will also be able to call ahead and make a room reservation with your favorite doll at: 0929710800.

Upon arrival, you will be given a menu card to choose which type of doll you prefer and she will be ready for you in your room. Payment is made at the reception desk and is P1000 for a 2 hour visit. Lubrication is provided along with an instruction dvd set up in your room, just press play on your remote to watch. All orifices are naturally silky smooth and feel just like the real thing. Use a little lube and you’re off to the races. This will change the way the adult entertainment industry operates here in Brgy Barretto.

When you’re finished just leave everything and the doll is thoroughly cleaned and sanitized inside and out. There is no violation of law, social distancing, or worrying about a runner, stolen wallet, or STD. She won’t argue over price or get upset if you fart in bed. The best thing is she never says “NO!”

As I mentioned before, the soft opening is this Wednesday at 6 PM and if everything goes well we will consider expansion by July. Piatnight membership cards honored. 10% discount to First Responders & medical personnel.

With the absence of the real thing, these dolls are an absolute God send. Please feel free to stop in for a glass of champagne during our soft opening, we will have all 5 dolls on display and an instructional video playing. Come on in and have a drink and check things out. We are very excited to offer an alternative form of entertainment to you and believe this will be the start of a growing industry.

I hope to see you there.

Would I be a fool to attend this event?

Meanwhile, back in the real world:

I guess the quarantine has exempted fire starters from the lockdown:

Yesterday’s special at “Gomans”:

I had another long hike with some fellow walkaholics this morning. I’ll post about that adventure (with photos) tomorrow. This damn curfew has turned my world, well, my biological clock anyway, upside down. Having to be home at 6 p.m. has me all out of sorts. I was in bed before 8 last night, how f’d up is that? Ah well, hopefully, this will be over in a couple of more weeks. Or I’ll adapt. One of those.

It’s April Fool’s Day. Hope no one made a fool of you!