I stayed for two beers. Service was attentive, and there was no drink pressure. It doesn’t appear they employ GROs, just three or four waitresses. The music was good and played at a reasonable volume, and the video offerings on the several large-screen TVs looked entertaining. BarCelona is one of the nicer venues in town, ambiance-wise. I’m not sure why I don’t visit here more often. Must be not liking all those stairs you climb to get there.
Sloppy Joe’s has been buzzin’ of late, especially since the move. I always notice a large crowd when I pass by. So, I was surprised yesterday to see there were no other customers when I arrived. But it didn’t take long to discover why. There was no manager present (something I’d also never seen before), and the girls were playing their kind of music at full volume. If I weren’t on a mission, I’d have turned around and walked back out. Instead, I took the outdoor seat as far away from the blaring speaker as possible and ordered a beer.
As I was sipping my beer and trying to ignore the grating music (and the music is one of the things I usually like about this bar–when the manager or Chris is picking the songs), a guy I didn’t recognize wandered in off the street. Turns out, he was from out of town (up the highway in San Antonio) and had been surprised to discover Sloppy Joe’s was no longer where it used to be. Apparently, that was his preferred hangout when he made his bi-weekly visits to Barretto. He was shocked that the bar was empty last night and also disgusted by the music. He shouted at the girls to turn it down, and they complied, making it easier for us to converse. I enjoyed chatting and wound up staying for three beers.
I figured I’d better put some food in my belly to absorb those beers that were yet to come, so I made my way to the only restaurant in the Maze.
When I had visited Jollibee earlier in the week, I wanted to try their chicken burger but was told it would take fifteen minutes to prepare. So much for fast food. I’d been craving a chicken burger ever since, and the Maui-style sandwich sounded perfect for me.
Two more beers during the meal, and I was ready for bar number three of the night. The Green Room was the closest to my current whereabouts, so that’s where I went. It was packed and I didn’t see any available seating, so I kept on walking. That’s a nice aspect of the Maze, plenty of options and they are all nearby.
Once again, I was the only customer. I took a seat in front of the dance floor and ordered a beer. Regular readers know I’m not a big fan of the dancing bars; sometimes, they make me feel a little depressed. It’s got to be a hard job under the best of circumstances, but standing up there trying to act like you are having fun in a bar devoid of customers must be especially challenging. For me, there is also a “meat market” vibe with the girls on display for potential purchase (well, more like rental). Anyway, I’m not being critical; it is just not my thing. Even in the go-go bars, I tend to gravitate more to the waitresses.
Last night, five dancers were shuffling around on stage at La Oficina. I wasn’t foolish drunk enough to call them all down for a lady drink, but a couple of them were rather cute. Instead, I had my waitress change some hundreds into fifties and gave each dancer a tip.
The dancer third from the left was in the “I would if I could” category. The one on the far right surprised me by knowing my name. She told me she used to work at Whiskey Girl. And my waitress knew me as well, having formerly worked at Queen Victoria. Damn, this is such a small town!
Two more beers at La Oficina (I hate that name, by the way), and it was time for my fourth venue.
As the first bar I ever visited in the Philippines (back in its Angeles days), Alaska has always been a sentimental favorite. And now that it is located in the Maze, I will be visiting more often. It’s a friendly place, and I always feel at home here despite it being a dancing bar. Last night was no exception.
When I found out it was my waitress’s first night on the job, I naturally felt compelled to buy her a lady drink to welcome her onboard. (And that’s the first LD I bought all night. But not the last.)
Good times and two more beers to wash it all down.
I guess this has become one of my regular hangouts, but that comes with a price. As soon as I sat down, I was surrounded by four thirsty gals I’ve accommodated in the past. I usually try to limit my company to only two, but the previously consumed beers overrode my better judgment this time.
Still, I had the good sense to limit the drinks to one each, and then I made my escape next door to Wet Spot.
I had heard rumors that my Hash buddy Dave would be celebrating his birthday at Wet Spot last night. But he hadn’t shown by 9:00 and I knew it was time for me to get my ass home while I still could.
There you have it, a successful journey through the Maze. Six bars, fourteen beers (but who’s counting?), nine lady drinks (that I remember), and an experience that is unlikely to be repeated in this lifetime. I guess that qualifies as a good night!
And for the record, there was more to my day than over indulging in spirits and bargirls.
And I’ve been studying up to increase my pun repertoire.
I did have a bit of a hangover this morning, but I’ve recovered sufficiently to be able to enjoy a little more hair of the dog that bit me when I feed the girls at Hideaway later this evening.
Cheers!
Where everybody knows your name,
And they’re always glad you came;
You want to be where you can see,
Our troubles are all the same;
You want to be where everybody knows your name.
re: all the bars in one place
What do you think about having similarly themed establishments all in one place? In Korea, you see this all the time, and to an insane degree: trinket shops selling the same wares right next to each other; food stalls, electronics stores, clothing stores, etc., all shoulder to shoulder. In a capitalistic sense, this is about as direct as you can get in terms of competition, but you still have to wonder how healthy such a mix is. It’s different for, say, restaurant districts because there, you’ve got a bit more breathing room, and it’s rarer to see restaurants selling food X right next to each other. I sense that, for barhopping, it’s convenient that you don’t have far to stumble when moving from bar to bar, but does this sort of close competition guarantee, in a Darwinian way, that there’ll be a loser? (I suppose one answer to that is Yes—fuckin’ duh.)
That sign is misleading; it is actually located on the third floor.
Some enterprising fellow had better slap a sticker on the incorrect text and right that wrong. I approve of vigilante proofreading!
Back to the Green Room next.
Who could that be in the reflection?
had been surprised to discover Sloppy Joe’s was no longer where it used to be.
That’s what he gets for not reading your blog.
Apparently, that was his preferred hangout when he made his bi-weekly visits to Barretto.
Ever notice the ambiguity? “Biweekly” can mean “twice a week” or “once every two weeks.”
That’s a chicken patty with sliced ham and a pineapple ring on top.
Looks nice. I’d eat that.
Two more beers at La Oficina (I hate that name, by the way)
Because it’s Spanish or because a bar is supposed to be where you go to escape from office life?
She’s forty and recently returned from a stint working in Qatar.
A friend and ex-coworker of mine works in Qatar. Loves the place. I’d go if it weren’t for the damn desert heat. Why’d she leave Qatar? The boyfriend?
Well, sometimes you just gotta go with the flow, I suppose.
Okay, now, that’s a strange smile. Did you see that video of DeSantis fake-smiling during an interview?
It doesn’t appear all those previously consumed beers adversely impacted my sobriety.
Jesus Christ, it just gets weirder!
I don’t look forward to the new puns, but you’re gonna use ’em, anyway.
Did the new tee work out during your walk?
I think having six bars in one place is a good thing without the redundancy that normally happens when you have several businesses under one roof selling the same product. The difference being that while all six venues sell alcoholic beverages, they are unique in other ways. Bars tend to have a “personality” that attracts a certain customer base, and those customers then attract other like-minded folk, creating a comfortable “at home” feeling among the guests. I call that the “vibe” of a place, hard to define, but it is a welcoming feeling that makes you glad to be there. I think the theme song to “Cheers” that I posted captures some of the vibe I’m talking about. The bars are different in practical terms as well. You have three bars with dancers if that’s your thing. Wet Spot also has a lot of waitresses and GROs/massage girls looking to keep you company. Next door at Alaska, there are fewer girls overall, but it has a friendly, welcoming feel. The Green Room bills itself as a “sports bar,” but it is a lot like Wet Spot without the dancers–I get swamped by thirsty girls whenever I’m there. Sloppy Joe’s is what I’d call a hangout place; people come to sit, drink, and bullshit among themselves in a pleasant, laid-back atmosphere. La Oficina is the new kid on the block, a smallish go-go bar with a more intimate feeling than its larger counterparts. BarCelona would also fit in the sports bar category (by that, I mean showing events on large-screen TVs) and offering weekly pool tournaments. I like the open-air rooftop atmosphere, which makes it unique among the six bars of the Maze.
“Who could that be in the reflection?”
I hope it doesn’t reflect poorly on me…
Yes, I did notice the ambiguity of “bi-weekly” when I wrote that. He said he came a couple of times a month, and I briefly considered “bi-monthly,” but that felt like once every two months. I probably should have just not gone “bi” at all. Not that there is anything wrong with it.
It’s not the Spanish of “La Oficina” so much as it is the irrelevance as a bar moniker. I mean, you can make a joke about The Office (wife screams, “Where are you?” and you say, still at the office), but that doesn’t translate so well. Plus, Oficina is kinda hard to say, especially after a few beers.
I hadn’t seen the DeSantis fake smile clip, but yeah, I see the resemblance. Looking back at the photos, I can see a pretty clear progression from sober to drunk as the night went on.
Yep. the t-shirt performed well–good fit, lightweight, and sweat-absorbing.