I got it in my head to revisit all the bars in Barretto and then update the rankings of my personal favorites. Of course, that will require a period of weeks to complete, but you’ve got to start sometime, and last night seemed as good a time as any. And since I was having dinner at John’s place, I began my quest there.

I arrived at John’s place a little before five p.m., and as I began my ascent up the stairs to the rooftop, the dining room waitress said the bar wasn’t open. John said it was closed because the upstairs waitress hadn’t shown up for work. Alright then, I guess I’ll be sitting in the restaurant. Still, it is not a good sign when you are so understaffed that you can’t overcome a single absence. I very rarely frequent the bar at all; I come to John’s for the food. I know he has a pool tournament in the bar a couple of times a week, which at least brings in the players. Anyway, the bar review will have to wait for another day.

John’s is on the far side of town (from where I live) and on the side of the highway opposite the bay. My plan last night was to visit the bars on the same side of the road between John’s and The Maze. So, that would be It Doesn’t Matter, Voodoo, Bottoms Up, and Hot Zone.

I’ve been boycotting this bar because of a waitress insisting I violate Rule #1 (don’t be a sucker) by paying for her kid’s school supplies. Well, that’s not the bar’s fault, so I just needed to resolve the issue with the waitress. I’d already blocked her on Facebook, and when I arrived, she came out to hug me. I pushed her away, saying, “I don’t want that.” I could see that hurt her feelings, and she immediately turned around and went back inside. I didn’t see her for the rest of the night. That works for me.

IDM used to be my top-rated and favorite bar. That’s no longer the case, and it has nothing to do with the wayward waitress. Since the owner, Bob, died tragically, the whole vibe of the place has changed. I think it is slowly coming back, but Sloppy Joe’s has captured many of their former customers. I always sit outside, but there are two pool tables (with weekly tournaments) and a dart board inside. Not a bad place to hang out at all.

Two beers at IDM, then it was time to move on.

This is a girly bar (with dancers) and not the type of venue I regularly visit. I usually have a good time on the occasions that I do. Josie, probably the oldest bargirl in town, was on stage, and as usual, she came down to join me for a drink. This time, another dancer I’d never met before also came to my table. I usually don’t appreciate an uninvited guest, but that is the nature of the girly bar environment. And since I had a coupon giving me a free beer for every lady drink purchased, I figured, why not?

Lyn is relatively new at the bar, so she hadn’t heard any of my joke repertoire. That was a plus. They each wound up with two lady drinks, so that gave me four beers to consume before my departure. It’s a small and friendly bar with a decent lineup and worth a visit if you are out on a barhop.

I wasn’t allowed to take any pictures here, which is a shame because owner Jay consistently has the best lineups in town. Last night, they were all decked out in new and sexy uniforms. If girly bars are your thing, you need to visit the best of Barretto in this category. I only stayed for one beer here last night; just wasn’t feeling it.

As I departed Hot Zone, I realized I had somehow missed the bar next door, Bottoms Up. I haven’t visited that bar in over a year, and I’m just so used to walking by like it isn’t there that I briefly forgot my mission.

It’s a small bar with three or four dancers on the stage. One other customer besides me and it looked like he had tabled a couple of the girls.

As you can see, Nikole isn’t particularly young or pretty, but in my inebriated state, she seemed nice and friendly. Perhaps overly so. After I bought her a drink, she began rubbing up against me, but not with her hands. Again, that’s not unusual in this type of bar, but I normally don’t like touching beyond a shoulder rub. I could see I might be headed for trouble, so I finished my beer, gave Nikole a tip, and said goodnight. There is nothing wrong with the bar, especially if you like a cozy, hands-on (or ass-on) environment.

And that’s where my bar crawl ended.

Next time, I’ll do a bar crawl in the new Maze complex, visiting all six bars.

I went to Wet Spot for my nightcap, and my coupon was still valid, so I bought a lady drink for my waitress and one for Aine, thus earning two free beers in the process. The Wet Spot dancers were sporting new uniforms featuring a braless top.

I finished my beers and headed on home, a little later and a little drunker than normal. The sacrifices I make for my readers!

Another SOB Friday, so I’ll be back to Wet Spot tonight!