Oh boy, what a day. Lockdown Sundays are the worst in no small part because of the way I react to them. Which is basically just being flat out unmotivated. Nope, couldn’t even be bothered to post my usual drivel here at LTG.
Anyway, I tried to make the best of it. Downloaded Stephen King’s The Stand. I made it through the first two hours before the beer kicked in and I lost interest. I’ll get back to it though, I’m sure. I was always a big King fan, although these days his politics get on my nerves. I read The Stand when it was first published way back when then I read it again when the expanded version (much better IMO) came out. The film version (made for television) was released in 1994. I’m sure I saw it but honestly didn’t remember it much. What stood out was seeing people like Molly Ringwald and Rob Lowe back when they were in their prime. Molly has a sweet “girl next door” look about her that I find attractive. Not bad for a white girl.
After pausing the movie I actually hung out with my Filipino neighbors in the back yard for a while. First time I’d done that. And yes, drinking was involved. The conversations were mostly in Tagalog so I didn’t have much participation but it was an okay change of pace.
Later that night things went to shit big time. I’m still processing that event and I’m not prepared to write about it here. Suffice to say it was the worst experience I’ve had in a very long time.
I really, really need to get off my ass and start taking steps to make some positive changes in my life. I’ve been in a “satisficing” mode for too long and to my own detriment. I believe I deserve better but it’s up to me to make that happen.
Ah well, going to Hash today and maybe that will help clear my head. Or drown my sorrows.
I’ve read both versions of The Stand and find them better than the TV version(s) that came out. I think I like the original novel a bit more because (1) it’s shorter and cuts out a lot of unnecessary plot, and (2) the extended version includes the ending where Randall Flagg reappears, which cheapens everything that came before and alters the situation from a definitive Armageddon to something more like a repetitive, samsaric, Hindu cycle of creation and destruction.
You’d think that a religion student like me would appreciate the expanded novel’s subversion of Christian imagery (to wit, the move away from linear history—i.e., events culminating in Armageddon—to cyclic history, i.e., events being part of a repetitive circle), but I guess I was looking for definite closure. The shorter version of the novel provides that.
“Later that night things went to shit big time.”
Gonna guess this is lady-related. You’ll have noticed that I stopped commenting on your love life for a year or so. My thinking is that I’ve said about all I can say from my admittedly limited perspective, given that I’m not a lady’s man (or is it horndog?) like you. Either you’ll figure this relationship stuff out for yourself, or you won’t. The other reason why I stopped commenting on that aspect of your life is that I began to cringe at my own tone and attitude: who the hell am I, after all, to presume to advise you on something I know next to nothing about? Sure, I have general insights on human nature, but I’m certainly not living anything like the life you’re living. You’re better off reading the online insights of other Western expats in SE Asia. So I’ll simply say: good luck with that. And please consider that a standing “good luck” for every future time that you blog about something going disastrously wrong. (And if the “turning to shit” has nothing to do with women, I apologize for wasting your time with the above verbiage.)
As for this:
“I really, really need to get off my ass and start taking steps to make some positive changes in my life. I’ve been in a “satisficing” mode for too long and to my own detriment. I believe I deserve better but it’s up to me to make that happen.”
Maybe it’s time to plan a long hike along the Appalachian Trail…? I don’t know. I do know that living with a purpose, even a limited-scale one, is better than living without a purpose, so if you can find some sort of ambitious project for yourself—something that takes a whole month or a whole season to do—you’ll end up feeling fulfilled, and maybe something of a badass. You could learn something new, like wood-carving or clay sculpture or Filipino martial arts. (Or Tagalog!) Carving/sculpture-related lessons abound on YouTube, and they’re free.
Good luck with the next COVID-19 Hash!
Interesting take on The Stand versions. I’d read them years apart so maybe I just enjoyed the story again despite losing the definitive ending you describe. And yeah, the movie I’m watching isn’t really cutting it. Hell, me commenting on Molly Ringwald’s looks is a dead giveaway!
Good guess on the cause of the shitstorm. I’ve actually always appreciated your love life advice and guidance even though I seem incapable of following it. I’m not sure why I continue to allow myself to get sucked into these unfulfilling relationships that are clearly bound to end in disaster. I fear that at my age it’s a bit late in the game to change my ways but maybe I’ll get lucky next time. I will try to raise my standards some though.
I’m afraid that the Appalachian Trail is beyond my physical capabilities these days. I’ve even swallowed my pride and do the “short” trail at the Hash lately. But yeah, two years into retirement I find the lack of purpose in my life disconcerting. I think perhaps the “horndog” issues stem in part from trying to fill that void. Actually, if I could find the “right one” to share my life I might be satisfied. See? I still haven’t learned! Anyway, good suggestions on things to try. Learning Tagalog would be a plus. Maybe I can find an attractive female tutor. And maybe we’d fall in love. Oh shit, here I go again!
John, Keep strong. you seem to have a pretty good perspective overall on life and the curves it throws you.
Quote
“Learning Tagalog would be a plus. Maybe I can find an attractive female tutor.”
Unquote
Yep, long haired dictionaries go a long way to making language class more enjoyable.
Thanks for the encouraging words, Brian!