I always thought that would be a great title for an autobiography.  It’s probably been used before.  I can’t remember the last time I had an original thought.  Actually, I do.  But that was a pun so it probably doesn’t count.

After more than 56 years of hard (meaning soft) living, I’m sure my body has paid the price.  How much, I don’t as yet know.

Nothing significant to report from today’s version of being poked, prodded, and probed.  Had some different tests than last time, but I’ll have to wait for next week’s appointment with Dr. Yu to get the full results.

I was a little disconcerted that my blood pressure was so high, it’s usually borderline (135/90) but today it was 156.  Also, they have this machine that takes a picture of your heart in 3D that they wanted to use on me.  Apparently, your heart needs to slow down to like 70 or something (keep in mind, I know nothing about it other than what I was discerning from some very rudimentary English).  They gave me a little pink pill, but apparently my heart rate was still too high, so I sat there for an hour and the gave me another pink pill.  They did the test, so I guess I’m golden.

In an MRI-like machine it freaked me out when a male voice with an English accent said distinctly: “take a large breath and hold it in.”  Followed by “now let it all out”.  After the test, I asked the technician about it but he didn’t understand a word I said.  I heard the same voice again in the 3D heart machine, so it was in fact recorded as I had surmised.

The last test of the day involved the prostrate.  A pretty nurse told me something about a probe and my anus.  It wasn’t the pretty nurse who inserted said probe but rather some male Korean technician.  He was none to gentle nor generous with the lubricant.  And while he was probing around in there his cell phone rang.  And he answered it!  I felt so cheap and humiliated.

Ah well, it’s all over now except for the crying.  Which I hope I won’t have to do after getting my results.