It wasn’t what you said…

…it’s what you didn’t say.

Ah well. Another one bites the dust. Sometimes you just have to accept that you are wasting your time. I don’t need a woman who doesn’t want to be there for me. Stupid shit really. So I’ve got to let it go and move on. I honestly think I’m done. There are worse things than being alone. Yeah, I know when it comes to relationships I sound like a broken record. Some fools never learn I guess.

But on a more positive note, the sun was shining when I awoke this morning. I did my routines and rituals, then headed out to scout some trail. Got a text message from Scott (Pubic Head at the Hash) asking me to join him for the Sausage Walkers. He wanted to do a flat trail starting out from the other side of Subic town and walking back to Barretto. I was down with that plan, so I retreated back to the house to load my backpack with snacks and water.

We met up at Angels Bakery then we loaded up in a passing Jeepney for the 20 minutes ride out to our starting point.
Then the five of us hit the road.
Kids cooling off in the dirty canal on a summer’s day…
And onward we walked and walked ignoring the heat and humidity…
That’s “Easter” mountain from the previously unseen (by me) backside. Kinda like the dark side of the moon…
A farmer working hard preparing his rice paddy for planting…
And still we marched on…
Despite the heat, it was a beautiful day. The surrounding mountains were resplendent in their shimmering greenness…
Eventually we came upon the Matain river…upstream before the denizens of Subic have filled it with trash…
A trike driver took the opportunity to wash his machine beside the river.
“Isn’t this the bridge you were afraid to cross last time?” Um, no it isn’t. But we are not crossing this one either. We need the next one down river…
There’s the bridge we need to cross!
A final view of the river from said bridge…
Now, this was just freakin’ bizarre. I was just on this trail a couple of weeks ago. The rains this week completed washed it out. Powerful stuff!
And then finally the traditional re-hydration at Cheap Charlies…
A 10.6 Kilometer hike all told.

And so ends another day in the twisted life of your humble correspondent. But the night has only begun! Time to get out there and see if I can meet my future ex-girlfriend!


I can read your eyes just like a book
You tell me different, but I know that look
And I don’t have to guess what’s between the lines

So what in the world am I still doing here
You push me away when I get too near
Saying love’s too simple to analyze

So why do I feel confused
Why do I feel so used
Like a worn-out thought you threw away
It wasn’t what you said, it’s what you didn’t say

Where are the windows, where are the doors?
I haven’t the key to your heart anymore
I haven’t a clue to what’s gone wrong

‘Cause you look at me sometimes as if I weren’t there
You say you’re listening, but you never hear
The strains of silence have grown so strong

I never wanted to doubt you
But I’d be better off without you
I’m no good at looking the other way
It wasn’t what you said, it’s what you didn’t say

So look at me one last time
With eyes that still know how to shine
Hold me like you won’t let go
But you let go anyway

No one belongs where they’re not wanted
You’re just a ghost, and my heart is haunted
When I said goodbye, you didn’t even beg me to stay
It wasn’t what you said, it’s what you didn’t say
No baby, it wasn’t what you said, it’s what you didn’t say

2 thoughts on “It wasn’t what you said…

  1. Christ, was this Marissa again? Sigh…

    All the wisdom you need to know re: women is already contained in this blog, and it’s all written by you. Woo-hoo! You are your own guru.

    As for the hike, it looked to be an uncharacteristically sunny day. So which is better—walking on flat ground on a sunny day during the rainy season (which might mean lots of humidity), or walking on flat ground on a rainy day?

  2. You know me too well. What? Listen to my own advice? Who does that? Seriously though, I’m trying hard to get it right this time.

    I’ll take sunshine over rain for sure. Now, yesterday we all had wet feet from crossing puddles and streams, but still better than being soaked. Although I noticed that I’m a redneck now…

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