I got this email entitled “Why I fired my secretary”. Reprinted here as a public service.

A few weeks ago was my birthday and I wasn’t feeling too good that morning.

I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say, “Happy Birthday!”, and probably would have a present for me. As it turned out, she didn’t even say good morning, let alone any happy birthday. I thought, well, that’s wives for you, the children will remember….

The children came into breakfast and didn’t say a word. So when I left for the office, I was feeling pretty low and despondent….

As I walked into my office, my secretary Janet said, “Good morning, Boss. Happy Birthday”. And I felt a little better that someone had remembered.

I worked until noon, then Janet knocked on my door and said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside, and it’s your birthday, let’s go to lunch, just you and me.”

I said, “That’s the greatest thing I’ve heard all day. “Let’s go!”

We went to lunch. We didn’t go where we normally go; instead we went out to a private little place. We had two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way back to the office, she said, “You know, it’s such a beautiful day. We don’t need to go back to the office, do we?”

I said, “No, I guess not.” She said, “Let’s go to my apartment.”

After arriving at her apartment she said, “Boss, if you don’t mind, I think I’ll go into the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable”

She went into the bedroom and, in about six minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake…

… followed by my wife, children, and dozens of our

friends, all singing Happy Birthday.

And I just sat there………..

on the couch………….

naked.