There was nothing wrong with January 10, 2023, but the first date I experienced with Gen last night was a disaster. Yeah, the red flags had been firmly planted right in front of my eyes, but I proceeded with the scheduled date anyway. I’ve been around the block a few times and had more than my share of dates over the years, so when I call last night the worst date ever, it must have been bad.

I guess it could have been worse, though. We met for dinner a few minutes after the appointed time. Gen had said she was shy and wanted to bring a friend, but she showed up alone. In retrospect, if she had brought a friend, I might have had someone to talk to. So, a lukewarm greeting on the street, then up the stairs to John’s place. The restaurant was empty, so we took a seat in there. The waitress brought menus; I ordered a gin soda and asked Gen what she wanted to drink. No response other than a blank stare. Same thing happened when it came to ordering food. I wound up ordering for her…bulgogi and rice and some Korean chicken wings. I know she could speak because she got up and had a lengthy and animated conversation with the waitresses in Tagalog. I assumed she was inquiring about potential employment. When she returned, I asked if she wanted to go upstairs to eat because John was up there playing in a pool tournament. She just shrugged, so I said, “let’s go.”

Things weren’t any better upstairs; what little she said, most of it I couldn’t understand. Now granted, it was our first meeting in person, but we had chatted (in writing) numerous times, and she was reasonably articulate. So, I’m not sure why speaking to me was proving to be such a problem. It was incredibly frustrating to be subjected to her non-responsiveness and apparent disinterest in me or anything I had to say. And she certainly wasn’t initiating any chatter, at least with me. She talked with the upstairs waitress but didn’t share with me what it was about. She also spent time messaging someone on her phone, which seems extremely rude in the best circumstances.

When the food arrived, Gen ate the rice (of course) and picked at the bulgogi. Trying to discern whether she liked it or not and why was beyond my ability to interact. I got her to try a chicken wing, and she said it was “spicy.” At the end of the meal, about half of everything was left, and I asked if she wanted to bring it home in a take-out box. She just shook her head no. So, I told the waitress to take the leftovers.

Once we were back down on the street, she was asking about getting load for her phone and wanted me to help her find a place. I’d had enough and told her goodnight. She did seem surprised as I walked away. I offered to pay for a trike ride home for her, but she declined.

Later last night Gen messaged me that she had cried all the way home. That I wasn’t the nice guy she thought I was. And now she knows why I’m still single. Maybe she’s right.

I’m not afraid of love. Just like I’m not afraid of poison. I avoid both, because love is poison to me.

Ha! When I checked to make sure today’s post title hadn’t been used before, I saw that in October 2018, I had written about The date that will live in infamy, so since I’m using “A date” here, that’s unique enough. I had to laugh when I read that post again because, honestly, I’d forgotten all about Cherry. That date had ended with some passionate lovemaking, so it was much more satisfying than my date with Gen last night. Cherry broke up with ME the next day because she claimed to know I was having a relationship with my domestic helper (not true then or now). Looking back with all the wisdom (heh, yeah, I know) I’ve gained over the years, I’m pretty sure Cherry was a freelancer, and when I didn’t offer payment for her services, she dumped me. She actually did me a favor in doing so, I suppose.

EPILOGUE: I was surprised to get a message from Gen this morning asking about the hike and whether she could still attend. I truthfully told her that everyone was welcome on the hike. And sure enough, she arrived by Jeepney right at 0900. Once we got started, she told me she had never hiked before. Today’s version was relatively easy, with only an hour and a half on the trail. I walked her back down to the highway where she could catch a Jeepney home. She was much more friendly and conversant during the hike and, at one point, even held my arm. Where was that last night when it might have made a difference?

Just a few minutes ago, Gen messaged me to say that she was at John’s place to apply for a job, and she starts training tomorrow. Well, good for her. I hope it works out.