Comments Posted By Kevin Kim
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Brian, I see what you’re saying, but if the transactional nature of the relationship is the focus (“What’s in it for me?”), this is little different from all of those ethical arguments that claim that all of our acts are ultimately selfish—a claim that gives all acts the same ultimate value, making it impossible to distinguish one act from another. That there are benefits arising from a good relationship is undeniable, but true solidity comes from the selfless giving that is necessary for the best relationships.
Personal example, which I trotted out when I gave a speech about love at my brother’s wedding (I officiated): when our mom was pretty far along with her brain cancer, I often wished for the Jesus-like ability to take her cancer into myself so that she could heal, and I could die instead of her. Had I somehow been able to acquire that ability, I would have gladly and unhesitatingly taken her place. A loving relationship has at its core an understanding of sacrificial commitment that mere transactional selfishness is inadequate to explain. Simply claiming that I derive benefits from the relationship fails to justify what makes it loving. If love is merely and fundamentally a trade, it’s not love. There has to be a sense that the two of you represent something bigger than either one of you alone.
The “everything is [quality X]” argument (e.g., “Everything is art”) fails because it makes makes quality X ultimately meaningless. Things are things only in contradistinction to other things. If everything is art and nothing is not-art, then the term “art” has no value as a descriptor. If a loving relationship is, at its base, no different from any other form of human relationship, wherein lies its value?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 26/May/2025 @ 8:52 am
I got a laugh at the different names for restrooms on the door to the toilet at this bar (Garfield’s Last Stand)
I’m surprised they didn’t have a good, British Isles expression like “the bog.”
Damn, so this must be the last bar on the hop. Now what? I checked the Angeles Hash Facebook page, and nothing was posted about the Beach Run. To hell with it, we ordered a beer and decided to do our own bar hop and finish here when the Hash arrived.
What did the Hashers tell you when they finally arrived? How were you supposed to read those directions/instructions? What’s with the sloppy “T-Backs” versus “TBACS”? How were you supposed to know what time to meet people after the walk? Where was the clear indication of the route’s starting point and endpoint (“Start at T-Backs” makes “T-Backs” the starting point, so what’s the endpoint, and how do you know? was the trail a loop?)? This is why it’s important not to be sloppy with language. Never let an illiterate idiot write your instructions.
Oh, and when we ran into the Angeles Hashers later, I learned that they had started at Jollibee’s and did a 5K hike before beginning the barhop. Thanks for letting us know. (To be fair, the Hash webpage was updated, even if Facebook wasn’t. I just didn’t know about the web address. Now I do.)
Wow, this must be Asia: rushed, last-minute changes (you said “updated”) that are poorly communicated. We get that all the fucking time in Korea. The sloppiness of a random, nonlinear life. The inefficiency that such sloppiness creates means you have to develop a “flow with it” mindset, but it’s still frustrating, even after twenty-some years.
I was in the local Costco on Saturday, and the place was a madhouse—worse than ever before. I remembered why I normally visit Costco on Tuesdays, a low-traffic day. Koreans mill around, stop suddenly and randomly, do 180s for no apparent reason, block aisles with no consideration for others, and generally act like selfish barbarians when they’re in crowds. Koreans one-on-one can be wonderful. In groups, well… that’s how you end up with stupidity-induced disasters like the horrific Itaewon crush a couple years ago (2022).
At least the sloppiness you encountered didn’t lead to 159 deaths.
Saturday’s report: 6041 steps. 4.64 kilometers. 3043 calories burned.
To clarify: that has to be 3043 calories burned for the day, not during such a short walk. I’d burn 3000 calories during a 25K-30K walk. But that calorie number seems high even if it factors in the entire day. A short walk plus a day’s worth of sitting? Is your Fitbit sucking again?
re: Jim’s “People who can’t find love buy it” (that video)
I saw this comment exchange on Instapundit between two older people:
WOMAN: My spouse of 29 years and I are discussing this evening what makes a relationship work by process of elimination. We agree what doesn’t work is a transactional relationship (IOW, “you do something for me[,] and I will do something for you in return”).
What does work is a relationship where each experiences joy from the very act of attending to the needs and pleasure of their beloved. Mrs. T experienced joy throughout her life through the opportunities you provided to her…and likewise the opportunities she provided to you.
MAN (who lost Mrs. T, mentioned above): Ultimately, our secret was simple though it takes two to tango. Each of us considered the happiness of the other to be more important than our own. So, rather than making demands of each other (transactions!) we each simply worked at making the other happy. We didn’t pull it off 100% of the time, but we weren’t too far off.
Isn’t it nice not to fall in with toxic people? Loving relationships that last aren’t based on transactions, which is why I’ve been down on transactions all these years. If one selfishly thinks only in terms of benefits, one really doesn’t understand love.
Today’s YouTube video deems Angeles foreigners to be “lowlifes.” Not everyone here is a [whoremonger—one word], and even those that adopted that lifestyle have their reasons. Why judge?
Judging, in itself, isn’t a sin—it’s an indication that someone has principles and morals by which to navigate life. And a mere judgment doesn’t put any pressure on anyone else to change. All it is is mental (or outwardly expressed) disapproval. People who feel pressure from someone who judges probably feel at least a little guilty about how they’re living: the last remnants of their conscience. They’re not “being made” to feel guilty. If they really had no conscience, they wouldn’t feel a single twinge of guilt.
I liked Jim’s video, what he had to say. I could learn something from his example.
I know where it starts, we’ll see how it ends.
Wow, you really don’t know what a comma splice is. I didn’t think the error would reoccur in the very next post, but you’ve exceeded my expectations! Let’s celebrate the loss of brain cells with a few more beers!
Nightmarish thought: What if you successfully live to 85 but lose all awareness by 80, having melted your brain to slag through drinking? From Swan’s point of view, that’s a long time to linger as a drooling, pants-wetting, bed-shitting dependent. I really hope her love for you is unselfish. Non-toxic.
Have fun at the Hash (preferably better defined this time), Mr. Fly.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 25/May/2025 @ 3:17 pm
I guess an “and” would have worked, too.
Not just an “and,” but a “comma-and.”
(a) The enemy appeared all around us; I was the only one to survive.
(b) The enemy appeared all around us, and I was the only one to survive.So now the question is: Will you keep committing this error? I guess we’ll see. One thing I notice about flies is that they have no long-term memory. If they go to a sunlit window, you can try to smack them, but they simply fly away and come back five seconds later, all memories of danger forgotten. “Learning” a lesson means retaining it. Did you learn, or did you just parrot? I see in your answer, for example, terminology that you never use: comma splice, compound sentence. Do you know what these terms mean?
As I’ve said many times, over 90% of your errors are addressed in my “Commas” series, Parts 1 and 2. If you were to reread those and practice them, you’d really internalize the relevant concepts. But that means work and effort.
My blog has a search window at the top. Every time there’s a comma-related question, instead of using Grammarly—which can often be wrong—visit the blog, go to the search window, type “commas” in it, and scroll down the search results to the relevant post. Oh, no! Too much work!
Without looking at Grammarly or any other references, can you tell me what makes a compound sentence a compound sentence? How do you know it’s not a complex sentence?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 25/May/2025 @ 1:49 pm
Thank you, Grammarly!
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 25/May/2025 @ 12:58 pm
The river is as dry as it gets, but come next month, it will be raging.
Are you looking forward to the rains? Monsoon season in Korea is most of July and about half of August, with rains still happening but becoming infrequent through September and October.
Taking the road less travelled through a [banana-tree] forest.
I’d want to collect some tarantulas from the banana trees, but I have no idea how I’d get them into Korea.
I only pass this way a couple of times a year, but the kids remember and come running for cookies.
“Yay, it’s SATAN! I mean, SANTA!”
free drinks from 6-8 p.m.
Ooh, spot the error!
Friday’s report card: 22,055 steps. 16.96 kilometers. 3937 calories burned.
A good report card. 17K is a step toward doing your big, 29K walk (San Narciso?).
I wrote about trying to write an essay after smoking a joint before class.
(a) I wrote about [trying to write an essay] after smoking a joint before class.
(b) I wrote about [trying to write an essay after smoking a joint before class].You’re saying you smoked a joint, then wrote an essay about trying to write an essay? Or that you wrote an essay about the topic of “trying essay-writing after smoking a joint before class”? Either way, actually high or not, that’s pretty meta.
Of course, we are still living in crazy times, I just don’t have any drugs to ease the pain these days.
Spot the error! And why is it an error? I expect you’ll quietly ignore the “why” part. Which is why you’ll keep making this mistake.
Enjoy Angeles City.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 24/May/2025 @ 7:29 pm
this was the time frame during which I met Jee Yeun, who was destined to become my final wife.
Luckily, she still is!
re: lack of drama
Yeah, I can see how peace and quiet might be a turn-off to some, but to me, I appreciate the tranquility and stability after all of that stupidity. That said, there’s still plenty of potential for drama. As noted above, you’re still married to Jee Yeun (she romanizes her name strangely: it should be Jee Yeon, rhyming with “she fun” or “we won”), which could be something were you ever to bestir yourself and go through with a divorce instead of passively leaving it up to her. And with everyone getting older, you’ve got more and more people having strokes and/or dying outright, so that’s all sorts of fun. Maybe start a dead pool (here). Some deaths are guaranteed to come out of left field.
Have a good weekend trip with your (technical) side chick! I’m glad she’s cool with the situation.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 24/May/2025 @ 3:03 am
This tree looks thirsty…
Meaning you’re gonna piss on it? Open wide, tree.
I can’t help but notice the Groundhog Day quality of my life.
It’s that “spiral time” I was talking about. Repeating, but never exactly.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 22/May/2025 @ 5:16 pm
It’s the right time of the day…
Rebecca seems to be okay. They did a bunch of scans and tests, and it turns out to have been dehydration, which messed with her blood pressure. Fluctuating BP caused her stroke-like symptoms (dizziness, cognitive impairment, etc.).
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 22/May/2025 @ 11:51 am
A nice but somewhat hazardous walk, what with little to no shoulder along the National Highway. Reminds me of my walk along the South Korean east coast. Lots of traffic, and lots of potential to be love-tapped by passing cars.
The new road down to the Bantay Bayan village is now open.
The road itself looks nice. Too bad no one thought to put in a walking path alongside.
I found it mildly amusing that my hike from Royal to Sit-n-Bull was exactly five kilometers.
5 km with a time of about 1.167 hours = a pace of about 4.3 kph. That’s about my pace, these days, when I’m starting on a long walk. By the end of 25-35 km, my pace slows significantly to under 4 kph, sometimes as low as 3.2.
u would appear, at bottom, to be just another narcissistic dude with a fairly serious drinking problem, seems pretty sure.
As a blogging Zen-teacher acquaintance of mine says, blogging requires a bit of narcissism, and I see the diagnosis of “a fairly serious drinking problem” hasn’t changed over the years, however much you might want to deny/rationalize it. But hey—if you think your liver and kidneys can handle the constant abuse, and you’re okay with the visceral fat twisting its way around your guts (not that I have any moral high ground on that score), then keep right on a-drinking. Only Mother Nature can teach any lessons, and if she’s chosen not to teach you anything, I hope you make it to 85 problem-free. My own experience, though, tells me that no one stays invincible forever, not even people who are still 30 in their own minds.
I wonder what he would say now that I blog every day?
Spot the error!
A Tolkien of my appreciation.
That was a minefield of bad puns.
Still no word from my buddy in Fredericksburg about his wife. He may just be waking up. I expect he’ll write to me once he’s at his office.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 21/May/2025 @ 9:11 pm
Mike’s wife isn’t fat and doesn’t drink, either, so what gives? I have no idea.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 21/May/2025 @ 8:46 am
My computer had a hiccup, and I don’t know whether my first attempt at a comment went through. Assuming it didn’t…
Sorry to read about Stewed Rat’s TIA. Good luck to him as he gets meds and therapy and maybe a prescription for a new life-path, preferably one without alcohol (does he even drink?).
My best buddy in the States (Mike in Fredericksburg) got back yesterday from a lovely trip to England, but his wife just had her own stroke-like episode, so they’re in the hospital, getting her tested. Possible TIA as well. It’s as if there’s something in the water.
Good luck putting all of your trees together into a walking path. Make it a good walk!
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 21/May/2025 @ 4:37 am
I would never relinquish my American birthright, even though I have no intention ever to return there to live.
Are you loyal to the actual country, or more loyal to an idea of the country given the country’s perceived reality?
re: “Ferme ta bouche”
Literally, “Shut your mouth.” Kind of bland. I’ve commented several times, but you keep forgetting, that the more natural way to say “Shut up” in French would be more like, “Ta gueule!” or “Ferme-la!” or “La ferme!” Of the three, stick with “Ta gueule!” A “gueule” is an animal’s mouth. A “bouche” is a human’s mouth. In French, when you want to be more cuttingly insulting, you refer to a human’s body parts as if they were an animal’s body parts.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 19/May/2025 @ 2:34 pm
The technical definition of a drunken blackout is having gaps in the memory caused by intoxication. Of course if you remember coughing and collapsing, that’s probably not a blackout. Gaps in the memory.
See here.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 19/May/2025 @ 2:19 pm
I seem to recall you writing, after some of your recent episodes, that you didn’t recall what had happened the night before. Sounds like a blackout to me.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 19/May/2025 @ 12:26 pm
We enjoyed all kinds of grilled meats, including burgers, dogs, chicken, and pork.
I didn’t see any burgers, dogs, chicken, or pork in that photo. Just fish and some sort of mystery meat(?).
I was relieved to read that driving in the pool is not allowed.
From that hilarious sign: “All children in the pool are must have adult supervisions, babies must wear diapers.” And that comma should really be a…?
I could spend all day proofreading the rest of that sign. Jesus. Incredibly, even with the Filipinglish, the intention of each instruction is understandable.
The guy’s table.
I’d fit right in with all of the man-boobs, double chins, and hanging guts.
What he said.
The “hath” was used correctly in that meme, but “mine” is generally used before a vowel sound or after a noun, e.g., “Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord” or “Enemy Mine” (movie title). In the A Song of Ice and Fire book series, one character often refers to her uncle as “my nuncle,” derived from the archaic “mine uncle.”
Yep, another blackout incident, another fall to the floor, and a cut on the head.
Nice to know that things haven’t changed that much!
From the linked blog entry:
Sorry to say, when the doc started probing around I screamed like a banjee.
I’ve heard of a banshee (see my review) before, but never a banjee. And where does the other comma go?
Also, I noticed this:
(1) …hit the floor, and now have stiches in my head…
(2) The also stiched up my head which comparitively speaking…Notice anything? One error in (1), and four errors in (2). You must’ve still been drunk. Or too hung over to have your regular IQ back.
Boy, you really hated commas back then. Just like nowadays.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 19/May/2025 @ 3:28 am
At least that “rickety” bridge had a railing. As long as I have something to grip, I’m okay with most heights. And that bridge didn’t really look rickety; it looked rather solid. If this were a primitive, violently swaying suspension bridge over a perpetually windy canyon and a half-mile plunge, I’d be freaking out.
re: Reekay video
He made the right decision: the mother would have been selfish to abandon her kids. Better for her to be with them than with him.
the phenomenon of mothers without children
This is a contradictory phrase: by definition, a mom is a mom because she has kids (or is that a bigoted thing to suggest these days?). The kids might not be physically by her side, but they still exist. “Mothers without children” sounds like “triangles without angles”—an impossibility.
That said, I can’t think of a short, neat phrase to replace the problematic phrase. “Mothers who’ve abandoned their kids”? “Mothers separated from their kids”? I don’t know.
I hope today went well/is going well. Get your damn laptop fixed. Or buy a new one, you stingy bastard.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 17/May/2025 @ 3:55 pm
By that girl’s standards, I’d be as successful in the PI as I am here in Korea. And despite her attempts at rationalizing, she does sound a bit slutty and self-justifying.
Looks to have been a nice (if steep) walk. Very nice views at the top, as always.
Ever thought of adopting a goat? Or having pets other than your dogs?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 16/May/2025 @ 7:08 pm
A nice outing with the Wednesday Walkers, although there was a misunderstanding along the way. I understood the group was going to do the Black Rock climb, and I agreed to join in. The rest of the group thought I was going to do my usual walk around and meet them at the bottom. So, when Swan and I reached the top of Black Rock, no one was there.
How does this sort of misunderstanding arise? Everyone simply assumes? I hope this kind of problem doesn’t occur too often. It feels a lot like one of those married-couple things where the wife says, “But I thought you were…,” and the husband says, “But I thought you were…” Every group needs a coordinator/leader responsible for communicating the agenda clearly and well beforehand. And you all don’t text each other when you go missing? Or is the signal bad when you’re out in the mountains? (It was bad for me along Skyline Drive.)
I’m sorry to hear your son no longer talks to you. So I ask in turn: what’s that all about? I’d guess it’s at least partly the American aversion to all of the May-September nonsense you old pervs engage in in the Philippines. But I suppose there are American examples of this, too, like the ill-fated Anna Nicole Smith and her nonagenarian hubby, J. Howard Marshall.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 15/May/2025 @ 10:29 pm
Steve’s a big-time leftie. Some years back, he disallowed me from ever commenting on his site again because, in his words, I had taken “a deep dive into fascism.” I used to think he was one liberal I could talk civilly with, but he didn’t agree, I guess, and partly thanks to the arrival of Trump, he chose his side and went all woke. I think the breaking point was all the memes I’d been publishing on my blog. I was never once uncivil when I commented on his blog. A shame, really. He’s otherwise a good guy, and I don’t have the same anger toward him that he harbors toward me. Then again, I’ve put plenty of people—leftie and rightie—out of my life as well, so I have no moral high ground on that score. The bridges we burn, eh? Funny thing: I’ve known the guy for years, since we were both on AOL forums in the 1990s, but have never met him. So… what did I lose, really? Or so I tell myself. The whole thing is kind of sad.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 15/May/2025 @ 4:33 pm
Yes, Wikipedia confirms it was “Diamonds and Rust.” Baez had a nice voice back in the day—lots of high notes with vibrato.
A movie buff I know wrote his own review of “A Complete Unknown.” He and I don’t talk anymore, so don’t tell him I sent you.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 14/May/2025 @ 8:25 pm
Now what?
Gather enough trees and make a connect-the-trees path. Create your own “tree Hash,” or “Trash.” People can go in groups or singly, and they have to take selfies at every tree along a given path: the filename of their photos ought to provide a date/time stamp. If it’s a group, they can take a group photo of themselves at the start, plus group selfies along the way, with every face clearly visible, to prove no one dropped out by the end. Or, if that’s too strict, just put the path out there for people to figure out for themselves. Assuming they know how and can navigate/orienteer. I’ll leave photo-upload methods and other rules up to you.
You have one of the worst cases of TDS I’ve seen.
I’m sure s/he had a response to that. Some people don’t know when to give up.
re: the “tolerance” meme
Hilarious. I may have to steal that.
“That’s impossible!”, says the old man in disbelief, “Someone else must have shot that beaver.”
Didn’t you just put this joke up—or one that was similar—the other day? Well, I found this from 2019 (scroll down). But I’m sure you recycled this joke more recently.
Old men are repetitive. They also repeat themselves. And I’m positive I’ve left that joke here as a comment, too.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 13/May/2025 @ 6:13 pm
So I guess the PI wants its citizens to be sober when they vote. Do they have any laws against voting while stupid?
Congratulations as you start your eighth year in country. Here’s to many more.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 12/May/2025 @ 10:02 pm
Sure thing. I’ll be here. I think.
Are you just unwilling to get your laptop repaired or replaced? Depending on your needs, you might not have to buy an expensive laptop as a replacement.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 12/May/2025 @ 3:14 pm
Something’s changed. You rarely ever respond to comments at 6:30 a.m. anymore, and you rarely visit my blog at that time anymore. Everything okay? Just sleeping later these days?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 12/May/2025 @ 10:31 am
Well, you’ve accumulated a lot of memories. I imagine it feels like an interesting ride. And you seem to have settled into the Filipino way of living, more or less. Any chance you’ll make a book out of any this? Some legacy to pass on to your Stateside family, who might need some catching up on what life has been like for you? Blogs aren’t forever, after all.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 11/May/2025 @ 11:10 pm
I’m glad to read that Daddy Dave is okay. How’s the driver? Fired?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 10/May/2025 @ 7:48 pm
You’ve got a lot of favorite trees. Ever thought of doing a connect-the-trees tour? Could be awesome. Can you plot each tree’s location via GPS coordinates? Info on how to do that is here. It’s a skill that could come in handy someday.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 09/May/2025 @ 9:18 pm
I went over to read your old post because I was curious as to what “duh-ee-na-stee” was. Apparently, you thought it was the hangeulized way to say “Dynasty.” But the long “i” sound (like the “i” in “night”) in Korean is written in two syllables as “ah-ee,” not “uh-ee.” So it would’ve been “dah-ee-nuh-seu-tee (다이너스티).” The “st” combination can’t be hangeulized as “st” because, according to Korean spelling and pronunciation rules, you have to interrupt the consonant sound with a vowel sound. So the “-sty” in “dynasty” would become a “seu-tee” (스티, see above). This is also why a simple-to-pronounce word like “Christmas” is such a mess when you spell it in Korean: 크리스마스/keu-ree-seu-mah-seu—going from two syllables in English to five in Korean.
The above remarks are true for the Yank pronunciation of “dynasty,” but a lot of Brits would pronounce it “dinnuh-stee,” which would hangeulize as 디너스티/dee-nuh-seu-tee.
Yeah, it’s possible to learn to sound out Korean words without having any idea what they mean. And FWIW, one Korean word for “dynasty” is “wangjo/왕조.”
Saying “heyo/해요” is less polite than saying “haseyo”; even more polite would be “haejuseyo/해 주세요” (sort of like “please do it”). But Koreans don’t normally say “do it,” by itself, as a command, the way we do in English. They’ll usually add some information like “that way” (그렇게/geureogae) to make the thought more complete in their minds. So you might hear, “그렇게 해 주세요” (“Please do so”). However, in an office context, especially if you’re the big cheese, you might get away with sounding less polite because of how social stratification works in Korean society and language. But in many Korean offices, people of higher and lower status all speak to each other in a politely informal (or formal) way. Again, this may depend on the office and the social context.
We English speakers immediately sense when a foreigner hasn’t said a phrase completely. For example, if I ask, “Did you speak to Bill?” and the foreigner says, “Yes, I spoke,” you immediately realize there’s a “to him” missing even if you understand the speaker’s intention. Every language comes with its own sense of how to form a naturally complete idea.
And now, alas, I guess you’ve forgotten all of your hangeul (written Korean) through lack of use. Nice to live in a more-or-less English-speaking Asian country!
Three years ago, I had my first and last date with this gal I met on a dating website.
Dating sites are lame and geared toward desperate people. Avoid.
And as every leader knows, success is about the quality of the people you lead.
And success in love is about the quality of the people you date. You’re a lucky man.
I’d pay to stay out of a Filipino jail because I know I’d die inside of one.
You’ve said this a few times before. What would kill you? Lack of beer and sex (there might not be a lack of sex—ha ha!)? Lack of general companionship? Something else?
Well, good luck with the next walk and stay out of trouble.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 08/May/2025 @ 6:54 pm
Sorry—I started writing the comment last night and never published it. I see your answer to Brian re: the start of the rainy season.
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 08/May/2025 @ 2:30 pm
«« Back To Stats PageSo, Danny got busy jacking things up and putting on the ritz, er, spare.
Nice Asian parking job! Like our BMW drivers back in the States.
The writing wasn’t on the wall, but the artwork was.
That’s awesome. Reminds me of similar art that we have in Korea.
Why I don’t trust sidewalks in the Philippines, especially after dark.
We’ve got deathtraps like that here, too. I’ve seen them during my cross-country walks.
And then just as I was coming into Barretto, the skies opened wide and dumped rain by the buckets.
You say it’s the “upcoming” rainy season. When does it normally start?
» Posted By Kevin Kim On 08/May/2025 @ 12:45 pm