Comments Posted By John McCrarey
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Yeah, I wear my mask around my chin in town and only pull it up when I see someone in uniform. How can I vape with a mask on?
These are scary times. I’m not afraid of the virus, what will be will be. But these power-hungry bureaucrats aren’t going to want to let go of the authority they’ve enjoyed over all aspects of our lives.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 26/September/2020 @ 7:46 am
Mark, NOW you tell me! It’s a good tip though and I’m going to take you up on it. Wouldn’t have helped yesterday because I didn’t carry my backpack with me to the mall.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 25/September/2020 @ 4:50 pm
No, it is a small pack but still bigger than I need. With the old one I’d put my thumbs under the straps when I walked (on flat ground anyway) and it did relieve the pressure on my shoulders. I’m hoping that chest strap does the same thing. We’ll find out today.
Yeah, I don’t like to poop in public, including public restrooms. Luckily, I’m pretty regular unless I’ve got something else going on. When I got to the mall yesterday I did use the toilet. Only to discover there was no toilet paper anywhere to be found. Heh, I guess that’s what underwear is for…
» Posted By John McCrarey On 25/September/2020 @ 7:23 am
One of the advantages to a little-read blog I suppose. It is good to have some space where I can talk about my thoughts and feelings. I do worry sometimes that someone will inadvertently be hurt by something I write here. That’s never my intent.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 25/September/2020 @ 7:36 am
That’s scary, Soju. I am not going into the water!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 24/September/2020 @ 10:33 am
Gentlemen, I am truly humbled by your responses and impressed by the unanimity of your viewpoints.
Judy is different than the women I have been meeting. Older for one thing. Never worked in a bar either. From what I’ve observed she truly does have a loving and caring heart. She’s really into gardening and nature as well. In some ways, she reminds me of my last (and technically current) wife Jee Yeun (the good ways, not the breaking her promises and my heart part) I honestly think if I had met Judy in another time and place where we were both single, she could have been the one.
But we didn’t and I’m not sure that our pasts can now be reconciled. Judy has a lot to deal with as her marriage unravels and I think I’m serving as an outlet for her emotions and perhaps she views me as a safety net. I do agree that her clinginess is a big red flag and that she is already using the “L” word with me tells me our definitions of love are not in sync. I don’t think Judy is a scammer or user but I know she is in a desperate place and from where she is standing I look like salvation.
Bottom line I guess is that other than the being married part, I could probably give her a go. And if her husband really does leave her I still might. We’ve not talked a lot about my marriage but my impression is that she hopes to be married again but I’ve made clear that is not going to happen for me ever again. Right now, I need to take a step back. I’ve done pretty well so far keeping my little head out of the decision making process. My big head says to proceed slowly and see what happens if and when Judy is truly free (or as free as you can get in the “no divorce” Philippines). I guess I’ve craved a loving and nurturing woman who thinks I am the answer to her fervent prayers. The reality of that may feel more like suffocation though I suppose. I am definitely keeping my eyes wide open and keeping my emotions in check. I feel like I’m in control and that’s a good thing.
So, if falling for the neighbor’s wife is progress I guess that shows just how fucked up I’ve been. As far as looking outside my comfort zone goes, I really wasn’t looking when this Judy thing kinda sorta happened. I’m really not attracted to the girls I meet in bars these days, although there is a manager I could go for in one. I still have my Date in Asia account open but my half-hearted efforts there haven’t led to more than a few brief chats thus far. It’s funny though, my profile on Filipina Cupid said something very similar to what Brian suggests–“if you ask for money before we’ve met I’ll block you.” Actually though, I’m doing fine alone. Judy is just a distraction at this point, I can’t even see her in person except for the rare occasions she comes to see my helper and I happen to be home.
Anyway, lots for me to think about and consider. I appreciate y’all providing me the honest feedback. I’m going to tell Judy to back off and focus on her next steps with the husband. I’m not going anywhere with or without her.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 24/September/2020 @ 8:14 am
“Upon seeing the tear in the painting she shed a tear.
Something crucial is missing. What is it, and where does it go?
Well, you didn’t close the quotation mark. I don’t think that is crucial though. 🙂 I believe the comma that is missing after “painting” is pretty crucial though.
It is pretty hilarious that an article on the difficulty of English has so many errors.
I normally wouldn’t even mess with the umlaut but since I accidentally discovered that it happens when I use the quotation mark key without a space I get the umlaut, I figured why not?
When I saw that Günter was going up the mountain behind my subdivision (as opposed to the big mountain off Rizal Extension) I figured I knew the terrain and would be able to bail as needed. I had never been up the way he chose (and I doubt I’ll go that way again) but I was curious. And the bad part at the end I was able to successfully bypass, so it was a win-win.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 23/September/2020 @ 7:31 am
Thanks again for the searing advice and suggestions for further reading. I always grill my steaks so I just need to do a better job with the pre-heating part I think. Of course, on the grill, I can’t always control what happens (dripping juices feeding flames and all). Also, I sometimes get distracted and don’t flip the meat as soon as I ought to do so.
Suwerte to me!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 23/September/2020 @ 7:51 am
Sojo, we separated at the end of 2015 by her choice. I figured it was on her to initiate the divorce that she claimed to want. I wouldn’t have a clue how to do that in Korea anyway. Anyway, she never filed. There are some pretty significant benefits for me being able to claim a spouse deduction on my federal tax return. Since I have no plans to ever remarry I don’t have any motivation to divorce.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 21/September/2020 @ 11:48 am
Kevin, yeah I preheat the grill before slapping on the meat but I didn’t have it going full blast this time. I’ll definitely pay more attention to the searing process next time though. Thanks for the tip! I’m usually more worried about overcooking. I prefer mine almost medium, but on a hot grill with distractions, I screw that up too often. I’m guessing they slice the steaks slim so they can give you four in a pack for that 1500 pesos. All in all though, I enjoyed eating some tender American beef again. I’ve got four more in the freezer, the next batch should come out better.
Yes, I’m married and actually Judy knows that. Her problem with it seems to be that it will make it harder for us to get married in the future. I reassured her on that account. I might be open to a relationship someday but it will NOT include marriage. Been there, done that. Four fucking times!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 21/September/2020 @ 7:42 am
Hey Brian, yeah imagine how it would be if I wasn’t actively trying to AVOID drama in my life. Damn shit keeps finding me! In all those years of being a manager, I never had to directly fire anyone, although I did make sure people who were fired, stayed fired. Teri is the caregiver professional and she was engaged in trying to calm me down, warning me about my blood pressure. Heh. To be fair, this is the first time I ever had a problem with Gina and I could have handled it better too. Hopefully, the drama is all behind us now.
Judy actually suggested finding somewhere on the old Navy base. It’s no problem moving within Zambales province, so it could be done. I’m just not willing to risk getting tangled up in legal issues for a piece of ass.
On the money transfer methods, no BPI is not linked to my American credit union account where my pension is deposited. The work around some people use is to open a Philippines bank account and deposit a check once a month or so (it takes 20 days to clear usually). That was my plan but I couldn’t find a bank that would let me open an account on a tourist visa. I brought in $9500.00 (just under the ten grand reporting requirement) once but felt very uncomfortable having that kind of cash on hand. And yes, it was a German living in the area who got robbed and murdered when returning with a large amount of cash. Rumor is his girlfriend tipped off the robbers. Another method is wiring money to yourself with Western Union or one of several other money transfer services. I tried that a couple of times but found it expensive and inconvienent. For example, I also do the transfers in dollars to avoid getting raped on the exchange rate. But the local offices never seemed to have enough dollars on hand and would then pay me in pesos at a lousy exchange rate. So the most convenient way for me has been to make ATM withdrawals once a week or so. Most banks have a limit of 10,000 pesos per transaction, but BPI gives 20,000 (when the machine is stocked anyway). They all charge 250 pesos per withdrawal, so I get more bang for my 5 bucks with BPI. Not ideal, but it works out most of the time. If I ever lose my debit card I’m screwed though!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 21/September/2020 @ 7:32 am
“Is this the grammatical version of a pushmi-pullyu?”
That’s about the best excuse I can come up with. Makes me cringe too. Honestly, I was in a hurry and dashed this post out with even less care and thought than usual. I *think* the “That is” was going to be a different sentence altogether and for whatever reason, my addled brain decided to go with the “just about all I did today was hike” part. If I could go back in time, I would just delete the “that is”. I won’t fix it now though because that would make these comments (which are probably more interesting than the post) irrelevant.
First my nose, now this. What a day!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 19/September/2020 @ 7:25 am
Kev, Well, technically it was a foot spa and a pedicure. You can get one without the other. I actually had my first ever foot spa in Korea. Had years of dead skin to remove, with deep fissures and cracks in my heels. The attendant told me I needed to come once a month in the future. I was a mess for sure. That salon is where I met Jee Yeun as well. And yes, I do recommend them…I go every couple of months and it keeps the skin on my feet in healthy shape…no more dried out cracked heels…
Bian, yeah the job must suck. And she wasn’t a good enough actress to pretend otherwise I guess. She was pretty cute though. 🙂
» Posted By John McCrarey On 17/September/2020 @ 7:09 am
No, the complaints are almost always in jest. If you say it was a good trail you have to join the Hares on the ice. So people come up with BS things like “not muddy enough” or my favorite for any of Günter’s trails “too flat!”
Ha! You noticed the leaf plate! It was actually quite effective.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 16/September/2020 @ 7:28 am
Comma before, please. Heh. Two sentences, two mistakes. And yes, it is an all too frequent occurrence with memes.
You are correct, the Hare’s don’t normally go out with the Hashers. I left an hour early to police the trail then hit the On-Home.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 15/September/2020 @ 7:15 am
Ditto.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 14/September/2020 @ 7:06 am
Thanks for the recipe. I’ve actually never ever attempted making coleslaw. My mom’s was what got me hooked.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 13/September/2020 @ 7:06 am
Oh yeah, and I frequently do. Still, it’s nice to have someone else’s take on it once in a while. Plus that slaw!
And don’t call me Surely!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 12/September/2020 @ 3:36 pm
I always was afraid of snakes… I’m holding out for gyro!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 12/September/2020 @ 7:11 am
Thanks, James. Appreciate your insights. I regurgitate a lot of the crap that’s in my head here on the blog. It’s nice to have readers that can help me make sense of it all.
Hopefully, the journey still has a ways to go. Thanks for joining me!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 11/September/2020 @ 6:35 am
Yeah, lechon is actually my favorite of the Filipino foods I’ve sampled. The pork here is the thing…Well, that and fish.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 10/September/2020 @ 3:49 pm
James, that’s a great perspective. Thanks, it provided good food for thought.
Kev, not sure what motivated Janey. Well, should did harangue me some more about the photo incident I wrote about. Turns out her friend “Judy” did lie to her. Somehow it is still my fault though. She said all the Hash girls are mad at her because of me. I didn’t engage much, telling her it was not my business and she shouldn’t let a bunch of catty girls get to her. In the end she asked if we were still friends and I responded “of course”.
That seems to be the way to do it with Filipinas in a small town. They don’t lose face so much and it is easier to just be friends than not.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 10/September/2020 @ 7:09 am
Yeah, no idea what David was really all about. The stories going around are that he was into the bakla (transgender) scene and that he pissed off the wrong person. Anyway, he made it to 75 and that’s my goal!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 10/September/2020 @ 8:21 am
Kev, well I am unarmed but I always try to be situationally aware.
Lauren, nice to hear from you again. What’s it been, going on two years now? Sorry to be such a disappointment to you guys, but at least I haven’t been forgotten.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 09/September/2020 @ 6:14 am
Hey there, James. Well, violence is less frequent here than back home in the USA, so I’m not too worried.
Yeah, the ice is well-used every week. It’s recognition/punishment for a wide variety of feats and transgressions. All in good fun, of course.
When I moved to the PI my daughter said “Daddy, I want you to be happy. Just don’t date a woman younger than me!” I truthfully responded, “honey, they are ALL younger than you!”
It’s funny when I first started writing the blog it was intended to be a way to stay in touch with friends and family back home when I moved to Korea. I don’t believe anyone in my family reads the blog these days. Truth is, after all these years I’m kind of estranged from everyone I knew. So the journal has become more of a diary I suppose and I try to write as if no one cares. I don’t advertise the blog or link to it from Facebook like I used to. That gives me a little more freedom to tell the whole story of my life, sordid though it may be.
Thanks for reading and commenting!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2020 @ 5:02 pm
I thought that quote had a familiar ring to it. It’s been a long time since I even thought of Love Story. Other than my own of course.
And yeah, I was going to use Seventh Heaven and changed my mind at the last minute. I didn’t know anyone was playing along!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 08/September/2020 @ 6:30 am
Hey James, yeah I only intended to have one helper but the other is a friend of the one I hired–she came for a visit and never left. The second one really just fills in on weekends when the primary is off, but she gets a small salary (plus room and board) now. I guess it’s a good deal for her. I don’t know of many expats with live-ins, but that’s my preference. And for the record, I DO NOT mess with the staff. 30+ years as an HR guy taught me not to mix work with pleasure.
Yep, life goes on and I’m going to continue doing the things I enjoy for as long as I can. Certainly not going to let small town small minds limit me.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2020 @ 11:10 am
The job description for my helpers is to make my life as easy as possible. They take care of the house of course. Get my prescriptions refilled. Pay my bills. Schedule any appointments I might need. One of them is a certified caregiver so hopefully, she will keep me alive should I have a medical emergency.
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2020 @ 8:03 am
Pete, yeah I’ve pretty much given up the hunt. I know there are quality women out there somewhere but they are going to have to find me. Meanwhile, I’ll just make do with P4P or friends with benefits.
Brian, yeah I hear you. I could never live the province life. And while it seems that everyone knows my name, there are lots of other expats around to divert attention. My masseuse told me she has three customers named John. I only know one of them!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 07/September/2020 @ 8:09 am
«« Back To Stats PageJerry, and I always thought bears shit in the woods! Honestly, it would make me nervous to have them out in my yard. Be careful!
Good luck with the daughter and nerve regrowth! Hang in there!
» Posted By John McCrarey On 06/September/2020 @ 7:34 am