A funeral. A birthday. A baby.

What a week.  Drove 1145 miles to Enid, Oklahoma so my mom could be buried in the family plot near her mother.  Actually, she was buried in Goltry, a small and sad outpost on the windswept and desolate Oklahoma panhandle.  I believe if you look up the word depressing in the dictionary you can see a picture of Goltry.

The day of the funeral was windy (as I expect everyday in that godforsaken land must be) and bitterly cold.  Mom wanted a simple graveside service and that is what she got.  My Aunt Pat (of fruit salad fame) led the service and the grandkids present each gave a moving tribute as to what Grandma Bonnie had meant in their lives.  Tears were shed and then it was done.

Well, we had a family gathering at the Western Sizzlin’ (apparently one of the finer dining establishments in Enid) and then those of us who were so inclined retired to the Ramada Inn bar.  The eight of us then proceeded to wash away our sorrow (at least temporarily) through massive quantities of beer and various other alcoholic beverages.

My nephew Jason and his wife Rosie brought out a guitar and sang “Upward Over the Mountain” in honor of my mom. It was an incredibly beautiful song and an appropriately moving moment that seemed to give each of some measure of closure.  I know mom would have loved it.

By unfortunate coincidence, the funeral day was also daughter-in-law Lauren’s birthday.  We did a toast in her honor.  Although Lauren was toasting us with fruit juice.  Because she found out that morning that she was pregnant with my son’s first child.  Apparently after quite some time trying.

Kevin revealed that in one of his final conversations with mom she had asked him to promise to take his son to church on Sundays.  He told her “grandma, I don’t have a son”.  She said “just promise”.

Renee is convinced that the first thing mom did in heaven was to pull some strings.  I don’t know about that.  But it was a day of days for sure and I wouldn’t put anything past my mom.

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3 thoughts on “A funeral. A birthday. A baby.

  1. I’m sorry for your loss, John, but I’m not too surprised to learn that the day was an alloy of high points and low points. Death and life are wrapped up in each other, so I guess we take each moment as it comes, and find the perfection that shines through all the surface imperfections. On that note: congratulations to you and your son as he starts down the path toward fatherhood.

    Peace and blessings,

    Kevin

  2. As always Kevin, thank you for your words of wisdom. I wonder if you realize the comfort you provide through your willingness to share your own painful experiences. I’ve never forgotten your Easter meditation from 2005 for example. I just wish I could do a better job at “putting it down” sometimes.

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